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IN PRIMO 


A STORY OF FACTS 
AND FACTORS 


ENILED 



Fleming H. Revell Company 

Chicago ; New York ; Toronto 


1899 


1 


‘TZ.3 


29620 


Copyrighted, 

1899, 

By Fleming H. Revell Company. 
TWO COPtFS RSCFIVEO, 



. „ lY I ^ CV 


TO 

MY FATHER AND MOTHER, 

WHO TAUGHT ME TO LOVE THE TRUTH. 


} 



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FOREWORD. 


IN PRIMO is intended to help young people and 
those who guide them to realize the importance of 
beginning life with high ideals and noble purposes. 
Intercourse with people in many homes of many 
lands has disclosed a need for the right kind of a 
foundation in the building of character, and for the 
use of the right material in its structure. A little 
wrong interwoven destroys its beauty, strength and 
symmetry. If this simple story shall prove an in- 
centive to truer living and greater achievement, it 
will have accomplished its mission and satisfied the 
ambition of the author. 













IN PRIMO. 


CHAPTER I. 

Miss Fledding, the daughter of a well-to-do 
London tradesman, was sent to the Continent to 
complete her studies. Subsequent business mis- 
fortunes necessitated her accepting a situation in the 
school where she was educated. Two years later 
she was married to Mr. Bradford, and removed to 
America, where, soon after their arrival, her hus- 
band died, and she established a school in the town 
of S , naming it Fledding. 

S , like most other towns on the Ohio river, 

had a mixed population. Among them were many 
whose fortunes were wrecked during the Civil War, 
in consequence of which their means were limited ; 
yet they seemed to have lost little of their social 
pride, and to a great extent, retained a strong 
prejudice against Northerners and their institu- 
tions. 

Mrs. Bradford’s English manners and Continental 
education recommended her to this class of people, 
and they patronized her school. Through them 
her reputation reached many families living 
farther south, and annually she received new pupils 
from different Southern States. 


9 


lO 


In Primo. 


Although many of these families, through stern 
necessity, had to exert themselves to obtain a liveli- 
hood, still, as intimated, they had strong prejudices 
and no small contempt for those who labored for a 
living. However, as the girls from these families 
grew older they seemed to form more practical ideas 
of life; and year by year the new-comers to the 
Seminary were less and less pronounced in their 
views. 

Fledding was not a rich, fashionable school. 
Moreover, Mrs. Bradford could not have conducted 
such an institution. Her pupils paid little and 
expected little in return. The rooms, although 
plainly furnished, were comfortable and cozy. If 
Mrs. Bradford did not furnish an elaborate table, 
no complaint was made, for most Southern families 
had grown accustomed to plain fare. 

The young ladies passed out of the Seminary 
fairly accomplished, and their parents were satisfied 
that in this school there were no associations that 
would tend to lower their social standing. They did 
not, by any means, regard their teachers as being 
on a social level with themselves. When enumerat- 
ing the advantages of Fledding Seminary, Mrs. 
Bradford never failed to remark that Miss Berkely, 
language, history and art teacher, belonged to an 
old, aristocratic New York family of fallen fortunes; 
and that she had a superior education, was unusually 
accomplished and had the bearing of a princess. 
Owing to these circumstances, I, who am Esther 
Berkely, received more social consideration from 
the young ladies than did the other teachers. 

The teachers stood much in awe of Mrs. Bradford. 


In Prime. 


II 


In a way I never could understand, she succeeded 
in impressing them with the idea that it was a great 
privilege, as well as an honor, to teach in a school 
patronized by the old aristocracy of the South. 
Among themselves there seemed to be more or less 
striving for favor from Mrs. Bradford, and popu- 
larity with the pupils; consequently, there existed a 
degree of jealousy among them, together with a dis- 
position to take any possible advantage of each 
other’s misfortunes and mistakes. 

As teachers, they were mechanical — and satisfied 
to do the same work in the same way year after 
year. Hence, they manifested little animation 
when instructing their classes. 

In this institution the accomplishments received 
most attention, although mathematics and other 
sciences were taught in a way that gave the pupils a 
superficial knowledge of these subjects. The 
teacher of music, dancing and etiquette was really 
the most enthusiastic, as well as the most successful 
teacher on the staff. 

When circumstances made me dependent upon my 
own exertions for a livelihood my imperfect knowl- 
edge of mathematics and physics, as well as my 
distaste for these subjects, prevented my obtaining 
a position in a first-class school, where my environ- 
ment, as well as my salary, would have been more 
in keeping with my taste and needs. Therefore, I 
was compelled to seek employment in this out-of-the- 
way Seminary. 

When I entered Fledding, Mrs. Bradford received 
me kindly, but I was not long in discovering that 
she and I would never be more intimate as acquaint- 


12 


In Primo. 


ances than we were on the first day of my arrival. 
The chief interest of her life was to make as much 
money as possible out of Fledding Seminary. Her 
every act, word and smile was carefully calculated 
to assist in accomplishing that end. 

Although always on friendly terms with my fellow 
teachers, our tastes and interests were so utterly 
unlike that we had very little in common, and 
socially I found myself alone. 

Under such circumstances I began my acquaint- 
ance with Julia Seymour. A few days after my 
arrival at Fledding, I noticed a slight, pale girl 
moving about the school-room, putting things in 
order, assisting the younger girls with their lessons, 
and helping in a general way, rarely speaking unless 
spoken to; timid in manner and easily startled. 
When I inquired who she was, Mrs. Bradford replied : 

“Oh, she is an orphan girl who works for her 
living and studies when she can.“ 

Seeing Mrs. Bradford did not wish to continue the 
conversation, I sought an opportunity, later, of 
speaking to Julia, and asked: 

“How long have you been here?” 

“Six years. Miss Berkely.” 

I then inquired about her studies and learned she 
had made good use of her time, although, during 
the past year, she had found little leisure for study. 
After this I spoke to her whenever we met, and 
felt much drawn to her. One evening, about four 
weeks afterwards, I asked Julia to come to my room 
to prepare her lessons. She came, and when she 
was through studying I encouraged her to tell me 
of her life before she came to Fledding. 


In Primo. 


I then told her I would like her to be my friend, 
and asked her to come often to my room, where I 
would help her that she might make more rapid 
progress. Her pale face flushed and then turned so 
white I feared she was fainting. As I threw my 
arm around her she leaned her head against my 
shoulder, and after several minutes looked up in a 
startled way, saying: 

“I beg 3 ^our pardon, I do not know why I did 
that. ” 

I asked, “Julia, do you think you can love me 
enough to be my friend?” 

“Yes,” she replied, “I love you ver^" much. I 
have never had a friend since mamma died.” 

I saw she was struggling with thoughts and emo- 
tions which she could not express, — probably did 
not understand, — so I let her return to her room. 

After that Julia frequently spent her evenings 
with me. She was a very apt student, marvelously 
quick in acquiring language, and simply devouring 
history. She also displayed no small artistic talent. 
As for mathematics and natural science, she already 
knew more than I ever expected to. 

As we became better acquainted, her timidity 
passed away, and she talked with me quite freely. 
She was anxious to graduate and become a teacher 
in the Seminary; for, knowing so little of the out- 
side world, it never occurred to her that she could 
teach in any other place. Not wishing to make her 
discontented and unhappy over what, at the time, 
could not be remedied, 1 made no suggestions 
regarding the future, but urged her to give special 
attention to such subjects as she would most need 


In Prirno. 


H 

to understand when the time came for her to seek a 
more promising field. Although these branches 
received scanty attention at the Seminary, yet, act- 
ing upon my advice, she made the very best of her 
opportunities; indeed, her progress surprised her 
instructors and class-mates. 

As has been said, she was pale and slight, but, 
when animated, her large blue eyes were very 
expressive ; ordinarily, however, she had a startled, 
apprehensive look. This was not caused by positive 
ill treatment, but she received so little attention 
from any one, led such a lonely life, and being, 
because of her refined and excessively sensitive 
nature, very shy, she instinctively shrank from 
notice. Her wealth of beautiful, golden hair would 
have curled all about her face had she not combed 
it back so tightly. Her movements were full of 
grace, and her voice, though seldom heard, was low, 
rich and sweet. 

In winter she usually wore a gray or brown wool 
dress, and in summer a plainly-made print or lawn. 
I subsequently learned that a new dress had to serve 
two years as “best dress,” and then was repaired 
and made over to last two seasons more. Her 
other clothing was provided on the same economical 
scale. 

Julia was honorable, generous, and affectionate; 
had not her nature been so repressed she would 
have been a cheerful, bright, merry-hearted girl ; as 
it was, no attempt had been made to bring out the 
best that was in her. 

Mrs. Bradford understood her own interests well 
enough to make everything as pleasant as possible 


In Prime. 


15 


for the daughters of her patrons, and always greeted 
them with kind words and smiles ; but she had no 
time to spend on the friendless orphan. Julia would 
perform her duties well whether she was commended 
or not, so nothing was to be gained by expending 
any effort on her. 

The school girls did not consider it consistent with 
the dignity of their positions to recognize Julia as 
an equal, socially ; many of the teachers, drinking in 
the pervading spirit, looked upon it as an imposition, 
if not as somewhat lowering, to teach a girl whose 
position was almost that of a servant. 

To be sure, Julia was never required to do rough 
work, but she had to hold herself in readiness to 
obey everybody’s bidding and was regarded as a 
sort of general help. The result of all this was 
that her social nature and much of her intellectual 
power lay dormant. Had she not been a girl of 
unusual ability and force of character, this mode of 
life would most certainly have crushed her, and 
apparently no one would have felt the least 
responsibility for the ruin. 

During four years Julia Seymour was my com- 
panion and friend ; she kept my life from stagnation. 
On my part I tried to pour into her life all the 
brightness I could. I also endeavored to encourage 
her in solving many of life’s problems, and to form 
opinions of her own. With great delight I observed 
her growing originality and individuality. Notwith- 
standing her unfortunate circumstances, she was 
developing into a woman of rare grace and power, 
which, with her natural dignity of manner, was 
winning for her a place of respect that even Mrs. 


i6 


In Primo. 


Bradford seemed unconsciously to accord her. She 
made no attempt to enter the charmed circle of 
school -girl society. I think she did not desire to do 
so at this time ; but she instinctively compelled the 
courteous, if distant, recognition of her fellow 
pupils ; yet in the moments of unreserve spent with 
me, she revealed a fun-loving nature, which, under 
less adverse circumstances, would have made her a 
leader in frolic and merriment. Her wonderful 
capacity for keen enjoyment might possibly have led 
to thoughtless and extravagant expression had the 
opportunity been presented. 

When we had been thus together about four years, 
one day Julia hastily entered my room, and said: 

“Esther,” (I had asked her to call me so), “a 
gentleman has come to see me and says that my 
mother’s cousin, Mr. Clayton, and his son Frank are 
both dead and that I am heir to his property! He 
informs me that as I am over eighteen years old, I 
need not choose a guardian, but may act in accord- 
ance with my own pleasure in the management of 
the property. What shall I do?” 

“This is strange news, Julia. Would you like me 
to go with you and see this gentleman?” 

“Oh, please do. I feel so frightened. Mr. Clay- 
ton was very rich. Mr. Markham says he has acted 
as his agent for many years, and would be glad 
to serve me in the same capacity. What shall 
I do?” 

In the parlor we found Mr. Markham, an honest, 
pleasant faced man. I said to him : 

“Miss Seymour is somewhat overcome by this 
sudden announcement which you have made to her, 


Ill Primo. 


17 


and has asked me to see you. Will you be so kind 
as to explain the matter again?" 

He briefly stated what Julia had already told me, 
and further informed us that Mr. Clayton had died 
a year ago and the courts, having no knowledge of 
any lawful heirs, had proceeded with the settlement 
of the estate. The family of the late Mrs. Clayton 
had recently presented themselves as heirs, but 
while the court was investigating their claim, he had 
heard from an old man who was formerly a servant 
in the Clayton household, that there was another 
branch of the family of which the only descendant 
was a daughter whom Mr. Clayton placed in a 
school several years ago. With some difficulty Mr. 
Markham had traced Miss Seymour to Fledding. 
He then named the amount of property which had 
fallen into her hands, and said he had come to 
inquire what directions she had to give, again 
expressing his willingness to continue as agent in 
managing the property. 

After a few minutes’ thought, I asked him if it 
were possible to defer answering his questions for a 
few days, when he readily consented to come again 
next week. I also asked him not to mention the 
object of his visit to any one in the school or town. 

During the week I talked matters over with Julia 
and we decided it would be best to continue Mr. 
Markham as manager of the business for the 
present. In the meantime Julia would remain at 
Fledding until she was graduated. 

On Mr. Markham’s return Julia informed him of 
her plans, and he explained what must be done to 
establish her claims as Mr. Clayton’s heir. In 


i8 


In Primo. 


answer to his inquiries we told him that six hun- 
dred dollars would be sufficient to meet her expenses 
during the year. When he expressed surprise at 
the smallness of the amount I told him that Miss 
Seymour had been accustomed to a very limited 
income and did not desire to make much change in 
her style of living before leaving Fledding. This 
satisfied him, and we again asked him not to mention 
her affairs to any one in the place, as at present she 
did not care to have the change in her circum- 
stances known. 

I advised this course without giving my reasons, 
further than that I thought it best; as she trusted 
me implicitly and was so bewildered by all that had 
taken place, she gladly followed my suggestions. I 
knew that if Mrs. Bradford was aware of what had 
occurred she would undertake to manage affairs in 
away that would best further her own interests; con- 
sequently I would either have to leave Julia entirely 
under her influence, or things would be made very 
unpleasant for me and might result in my being 
obliged to resign my position. 

In the second place, if the school girls knew that 
Julia had inherited a large fortune, and that she was 
really a descendant of one of the oldest and wealth- 
iest families in the country, there would probably 
be a decided change in their attitude towards her. 
Julia was sufficiently bewildered without having her 
confusion of thought increased by a sudden and 
entire change in her social atmosphere. 

I knew that the teachers, also, would be much 
influenced by Julia’s altered circumstances; those 
who hitherto had so unwillingly received her into 


In Prime. 


19 


their classes, would at once discover her superior 
capacity and attainments, and would make them- 
selves ridiculous in their efforts to win her favor. 

Besides, she had been so kept back in her studies 
that if she were graduated in one year she would 
need all her time for preparation ; and the changes 
that would take place, were her affairs made known, 
would necessarily take up more or less of her time 
and attention. 

But, more than all, until she could, to a certain 
extent, realize that the hollowness of much pro- 
fessed friendship could do her little harm beyond 
causing her disappointment and sorrow because 
most people are not so good as they would represent 
themselves, I did not want her mind and heart dis- 
turbed by these changes with their too apparent 
causes. Notwithstanding the cold neglect to which 
she had been subjected, there was no bitterness 
in her feelings towards those around her. It seemed 
never yet to have occurred to her that she had the 
slightest claim upon any one for consideration. 

I was then young, yet I had been repeatedly 
shocked by the hardness, unkindness and indifference 
of people towards those who they supposed had 
no especial influence to retard or advance their own 
interests; yet these same people studied to be 
pleasing and generous with those from whom they 
desired favors, socially or otherwise. 

I did not want Julia to feel the utter loathing for 
human nature which I felt when I realized that of 
the many who had once flattered me and professed 
so much affection for me, only a few had been my 
real friends — the same in adversity as in prosperity. 


io 


In Prime. 


In the time of trouble I became painfully aware that 
the majority of my professed friends had cared for 
me only because I was a rich man’s daughter, and 
I passed through some very dark hours. Had not 
the unfailing Friend stood near me all the time, say- 
ing, “Look unto Me for help,” I should have 
renounced everything and called all false. I did not 
wish Julia to have such a lesson now. I wanted her 
to learn these things gradually, so that when life’s 
full responsibilities came to rest upon her, she would 
know, without having received a great and sudden 
shock, that human nature is much the same every- 
where, and that we need not expect much from it 
when misfortunes come. 

At the beginning of the fall term Julia told Mrs. 
Bradford that she now had means to pay for her 
schooling until the end of the year and asked for 
admission as a regular pupil. Mrs. Bradford asked 
some questions, but in her straightforward way 
Julia told her she did not wish to make any explana- 
tions. Mrs. Bradford, really abashed at her gentle, 
lady-like reserve, and firmness of character, con- 
sented to receive her as a pupil. She was aston- 
ished, however, when Julia asked permission to 
retain her cheerless little room; but Julia gave as 
her reason, “I am not acquainted with the girls and 
would not feel at home with them.” 

During the year Julia spared no time from her 
studies, rarely leaving the building, except on 
errands, and talked little about future plans; but 
what she said showed that she was not simply calcu- 
lating how much personal enjoyment she could 
derive from her wealth, but was thinking intently 


In Prime. 


21 


how it might be used to advance the interests of 
others. It was evident that she purposed making 
the best of her life and opportunities. 

Sometimes I was anxious because of her inex- 
perience and ignorance of the world outside of 
Fledding; but I rejoiced to observe her increasing 
strength of character and originality, without any 
abatement of her innate modesty; and felt sure that 
when the test came, she would be found possessed 
of sufficient self-confidence to enable her to carry 
out what her more mature judgment should dictate 
was best. As yet, her natural independence was 
overshadowed by her implicit faith in my wisdom 
and her utter reliance on my judgment. 

I thought it best not to advise her at present 
regarding her future, further than to suggest that 
during her first year in the active world she would 
be wise not to undertake any special enterprise, nor 
make any decided changes in business matters; but 
rather, to live quietly, and learn all she could about 
her new duties, and thus grow into fitness for her 
position. If she moved thus slowly and understand- 
ingly, I had no fear but she would manage wisely. 

At last Graduation Day came, and Julia went to 
her own home, leaving me to my lonely life. Our 
friendship continued and strengthened with the 
years. She has been a blessing and help to me ever 
since I knew her, and I know the world has been 
made better because she lived in it. 

With so many reminders of her existence still 
about me, I cannot yet realize that Julia has again 
passed out into a new world, again leaving me 
behind. 


22 


In Prime. 


A few days ago I sat by her side as she entered 
into her eternal rest, and soon after looked for the 
last time upon the sweet face, on which rested a 
smile which said to me ‘ ‘ Peace. ' ’ 

Her journal was placed in my hands, with the 
words : 

“Make any use of it you may think best.” 

I have just finished reading it, and as it lies before 
me, my mind goes back over her life since I knew 
her, and I want to give some of its blessedness to 
others. So I invite the reader to share with me its 
hallowed pages. 


CHAPTER 11. 


June — , 1 8 — . — 

I am twenty-one years old — rich, 
and my own mistress. I am so glad to be free ! 
And yet I am so lonely. Only twenty-one years 
old and not a relative in the world, and hardly a 
friend ! But for the first time in my life, I may go 
out and come in, rise and retire when I choose. 

How beautiful it looks out of doors ! I was never 
in the country before and feel as if I must go wild 
with joy. Yet it is sad to remember that I am 
here through the disappointments and heart-breaks 
of others. Now I must close this first entry in my 
journal. The breakfast bell is ringing, and this 
fresh air makes me so hungry. 

June — , 1 8 — . — 

There ! I promised Esther I 
would write my first thoughts on waking on my 
twenty-first birthday, and let them be the beginning 
of a journal from which she should have such 
extracts as I would be willing for her to see. 
Probably there will be nothing in it she may not 
read ; but she will soon grow tired of reading such 
a journal as I shall write. 

That first entry looks queer and reads queerer, 
but it tells just how I felt yesterday morning, and I 
feel just the same to-day. 

Monday night, about nine o’clock, I arrived at 
my new home — the first home I have had since I 
23 


24 


In Primo. 


was six years old. It was dark, rainy and dreary, 
but as the carriage drove up the hall door opened 
and a flood of light poured out. Mrs. Tate, the 
housekeeper, a kind, elderly Scotch woman, was 
there with a warm welcome and kind inquiries. 
Was I wet and tired? Was I not very hungry? 
Dinner was ready. She took me to a bright, cozy 
room, removed my wraps, and then conducted me 
to the dining room. I would not allow myself even 
to think of the place as mine. I said, to-morrow, 
to-morrow^ I shall begin to live; to-morrow I will 
take possession of my own. 

So, after dinner I unpacked a valise, and then told 
Mrs. Tate we would do no more until morning. I 
slept, oh, so soundly, and did not waken until long 
after the sun had risen. I sprang up, ran to the 
window, drew the curtains and looked out upon the 
green grass, leafy trees and lovely flowers, washed, 
refreshed and beautified by the rain of the previous 
evening. Beyond, to the north, lay Silver Creek 
flashing in the bright sunlight. How cool and 
invigorating the air, how fragrant and delightful 
the odors! And this home was all mine! I was 
free to do with it all just as I chose; could stay here 
as long as I wished. 

It was the first holiday of my life, and I spent it 
running through the garden, wandering through 
the stables and barns, and roaming in the adjacent 
woods. My first birthday in the country — and my 
own home — shall I ever forget it? 

This morning I received a letter from Mrs. 
Howard, Esther’s friend, which I must copy into 
my journal; 


In Primo. 


25 


M — , June — , 18 — . 

Dear Miss Seymour: — I wanted to write this 
letter in time for you to receive it the first day you 
spent in Sunset Park, but it will be too late for that. 

I wish to express to you my joy that all this good 
fortune has come to you, and my sympathy with 
you in all the happiness and responsibility which it 
brings. 

Will you allow one who feels a deep interest in 
you to counsel you concerning the new life upon 
which you are entering? You have riches at your 
command; all that money can procure may be 
yours. It is right that you should enjoy life; but 
will you not consider well, during these first months, 
what will be the best use you can make of your life 
and of your wealth? So few rich people think 
seriously about this important matter and thus 
miss the choicest blessings. Will you not endeavor 
to so consecrate your life and your money that they 
may be used for the glory of God and the good of 
the world? As you look forward to the time when 
you must lay aside all that belongs to this world, 
do you not desire to leave behind you the record of 
a life so spent that it may be a worthy example to 
other young people? 

In order to do this, the all-important thing is to 
begin right. After business habits and all things 
connected with a rich person’s life have become 
fixed, influences, circumstances and environments 
make it difficult to change. Whether you will live 
for yourself alone, or to benefit others as far as may 
be in your power, will be settled within the next few 
years. I know you will think of these things and 


26 


In Prime. 


pray for divine help and guidance in ordering the 
affairs of your life. 

I hope sometime to meet you again, and it will 
give me great pleasure if I may occasionally hear 
from you. Praying that all good things may be 
yours, I remain. 

Your affectionate friend, 

CORDELIA HOWARD. 

How very thoughtful in Mrs. Howard to write me 
this letter now! I have replied, thanking her for 
it and assuring her I would endeavor to profit by 
this kind and timely advice. 

I owe to Esther my pleasant acquaintance with 
Mrs. Howard. What, indeed, do I not owe to her? 
Through Mrs. Howard I learned much of Esther’s 
history previous to her coming to Fledding. When 
Esther was ten years old, her father, then a rich 

man in , employed Mrs. Howard as governess. 

She remained in the family five years, when she 
married and removed to Boston. Mrs. Howard 
never tired of telling about Esther’s good qualities, 
and considered her a brilliant student, thoughtful 
beyond her years, and of a remarkably strong, up- 
right character. She was a bright, gleesome, 
spirited girl and of such a gentle, amiable disposi- 
tion that her father called her his “Sunbeam.” 

She grew to be a tall, graceful, dignified young 
lady, with masses of dark brown hair in which the 
sunshine seemed hiding ; and dark brown eyes that 
spoke wise and beautiful things, although at times 
they danced with merriment, for she keenly 
appreciated the humorous side of the happenings of 


In Primo. 


27 


life. She was educated and moved in the highest 
social circles, of which she was the ornament and 
pride, — but was not engrossed with her own selfish 
enjoyment. There were none so lowly that she was 
not ready at the first opportunity to expend her best 
effort to put them at their ease and make them 
happy. 

When Esther was twenty years old her father 
died, leaving his affairs unsettled. Nothing was 
left for his widow and children. Besides Esther, 
who was the eldest of the family, there were two boys, 
sixteen and eighteen years of age, and two daughters, 
one twelve and the other fourteen years old. 

Esther had received an education befitting an 
accomplished young lady rather than one that would 
enable her to provide for herself and those depend- 
ent upon her. However, she had considerable 
talent as an artist, and as before her father’s 
death her slightest wish was gratified if possible, 
she had received the best instruction to be secured. 
Esther was also a fine linguist, speaking French, 
German and Italian almost as fluently as English ; 
she had also made a special study of history and the 
literature of the languages with which she was 
familiar. 

Her knowledge and accomplishments were now 
put to good use. Having settled her mother in a 
small cottage, the rent of which it taxed the 
resources of the family to meet, Esther accepted a 
position as teacher at Fledding. The boys obtained 
situations as clerks on low salaries, and the younger 
girls attended school. 

Esther has been at Fledding for five years; the 


28 


In Primo. 


elder brother, Richard, has proved himself a suc- 
cessful salesman; the younger brother, Edward, 
has not succeeded so well, as, could he have com- 
pleted his education, his tastes would have led him 
to choose a profession. Nevertheless, he is a con- 
scientious worker, and year by year his salary has 
been increased. Clara, the second daughter, was 
graduated from high school last year and has a 
position in a village school. Henrietta, the youngest 
daughter, is still in school. 

Although it has been a great disappointment to the 
family that Richard and Edward could not go 
through college, as their father had planned, yet it 
is a great satisfaction to the children that they are 
able to provide for their mother a comfortable home. 
If they cannot supply her with luxuries, she has 
now, at least, to undergo no hardship, as was the case 
during the first two years after their father’s death. 

Mrs. Berkely is a sweet, patient woman, who, 
amid grief and misfortune, has encouraged her 
children in their struggle with the world, by always 
making the best of circumstances, never complain- 
ing, but constantly reminding them of God’s care. 
Her subdued but cheerful manner, her contented 
smile and hopeful words have helped them over 
many hard places. 

Ill health has prevented her assisting in the labor 
necessary to provide their support; but her chil- 
dren always assure her that she has been their 
inspiration, declaring that they would have given 
up the struggle long ago had they not, day after 
day, on returning from their work, found her seated 
in her easy chair, with a bright look and a kind 


In Prime. 


29 


word of welcome. Mrs. Howard frequently 
remarked, “With such a mother to instruct her by 
precept and example, it is not surprising that Esther 
has become the noble young woman that she is.” 

Through all their adversities, Mrs. Howard has 
been the unfailing friend of the Berkelys, taking an 
especial interest in Esther, and rendering every 
assistance the independent, spirited family would 
permit. 

June — , 18 — . — 

I must take more time to write in 
this journal the events of each da}^ as they occur. 

When I rose yesterday morning I carefully 
examined my room and its furnishings for the first 
time. It is quite a contrast to the little seven-by- 
nine bedroom I occupied at Fledding. How plainly 
I can see the faded carpet and narrow bed, the tiny 
old wash-stand, the cracked pitcher with its time- 
colored bowl ; and the tiny mirror which made my 
face look all awry ! And those pegs on the wall that 
held my entire stock of dresses, wraps — and one lone 
hat ! While there in the corner, serving as a seat, 
was a small box which held all my other possessions. 

Well, as I said, I looked about my large and 
elegantly furnished apartments and examined the 
adjoining dressing room, finding that my trunk had 
been unpacked and the contents stored away in the 
capacious closets and drawers with which my rooms 
are so abundantly supplied. M}^ wardrobe takes up 
very little space as yet. Parsons, my maid — Oh ! I 
forgot to say that I have a maid ! It gives me such 
a queer feeling to think of it. When Mr. Markham 
sent his clerk to Fledding to see what I would like 


30 


In Prime. 


to have done for me at Sunset Park, and what 
assistance I would require on the journey, he asked 
if he should send a maid to accompany me. I 
caught my breath and answered “No.” He then 
said he would send her directly to the Park, where 
she would await my coming. On the evening of my 
arrival, feeling so uncertain about everything, I told 
Mrs. Tate if she would kindly give me such 
assistance as I might need, I would prefer to see no 
one else that night. I thought no more about it 
until the next morning when Parsons came and 
proffered her services to help me dress. Imagine 
my amazement ! Well, she has busied herself as best 
she could. Never having had a maid, I do not quite 
know what to do with her. 

Yesterday morning Mrs. Tate asked me if I 
would not go over the house and receive from her an 
inventory of the furnishings, linen and plate. I 
replied : 

“I do not care to look at the things just yet. I 
want to drive out to the fields and over the country 
to-day, and see what everything is like. ’ ’ 

“But I feel anxious lest anything should happen, 
and then you may feel dissatisfied with me.” 

“No, I would not,” was my reply, but she seemed 
so worried that I concluded to please her, thinking it 
would take only an hour or two, — but it took all day ! 

First we went to the kitchen, and there the cook, 
in a brand new calico dress, attended by the kitchen 
maids, displayed her store of cleanly-kept kitchen 
utensils. Then, in the dining-room the table maid 
showed me enough silverware to furnish a store. 
Such beautiful things in solid silver! I enjoyed 


In Primo. 


A! 

this. When we had looked at the china and table 
linen, behold, luncheon was ready. By the time 
we had examined the parlors, sleeping apartments, 
stores of linen, noted the furnishings and inspected 
the servants’ rooms it was six o’clock, and too late 
for my drive. I had worked very hard all day and 
was glad to rest, leaving everything else for the 
morrow. 

June — , 1 8 — . — 

This is Friday morning, and I 
must write everything up to date. Tuesday, being 
so warm, I wore my lawn dress, and in the evening 
found it was much torn and soiled, the result of my 
prowling around out of doors all day. I have soiled 
my other thin gown, and to-day had to wear my 
traveling suit, which Parsons had brushed and 
repaired. 

My wardrobe must be replenished. I was 
inclined to laugh when Esther remarked that I 
would find my wardrobe too limited, but could pro- 
vide myself with whatever I needed when I was at 
leisure from school duties. But Esther knew better 
than I, as she always does. 

So, yesterday, having donned the traveling dress, 
I drove miles and miles. I have seen every field I 
own in this part of the world, and looked up the 
country generally. It is ever so much nicer than in 
town. I made the time spent profitable as well as 
pleasant by learning many things about the value of 
land, the machinery used in farming and crops 
raised. The men working in the fields were 
very obliging and willing to explain everything. 
The overseer said : 


32 


In Primo. 


“Well, Miss, we must look sharp, for I see you 
are going to be a good farmer. ’ ’ 

“I am sure,” I replied, “everything is going on 
well, so you need not be afraid of me.” 

“Yes, but you are one that will find out things for 
yourself. Mr. Clayton always sent his agent to 
look after matters. He was a city man and knew 
very little about farming, so his plans were not 
always the best.” 

“Well, I will try to be a good farmer. Where do 
you live?” 

“Down there by the school-house.” 

Having found out where the other men lived, I 
came home very tired. 

This morning Mrs. Tate asked me, “Do you know 
your face is quite sunburned? You will spoil your 
complexion going out in the middle of the day this 
hot weather.” 

“Oh, Mrs. Tate, I never was in the country before, 
and I feel as if I could not stay in the house. ’ ’ 

“But you will tire yourself out, and we shall have 
you sick; then you will have to stay in the 
house. ” 

“Well, on Sunday I will stay in the house all day 
and read and be quiet. ’ * 

“Will you not go to church?” 

“I did not know there was a church here.” 

“Oh, yes, there is a Methodist church in the 
village where you got off the cars. It is only two 
miles away.” 

“Is there? I drove down the road at the side of 
the village yesterday, so I do not know what is 
there. Well, I will see, — if it is not too hot. I 


In Primo. 


33 


have no more thin dresses, and yesterday I was very 
uncomfortable in this serge. ’ ’ 

“Miss Seymour, do you not think you would better 
have some nice older lady as a companion for you? 
Please do not think me presuming, — do not be dis- 
pleased, but you are too young to be here alone. ’ ’ 

“Why, Mrs. Tate, I am not alone! You and all 
these other people are here. What can I want any 
one else for?” 

“But, my dear young lady, it is not proper for one 
in my position to advise you. ’ ’ 

“But why should I have any one to advise me? 
What would one advise me about?” 

“Young people are likely to make mistakes, and 
to be misunderstood. I think, if your mother were 
here, she would have objected to your spending 
last Thursday alone out in the Park and woods.” 

“But why? There was nothing to harm me! I 
am not afraid of the people who work for me ; they 
are all very kind.” 

“All that may be true, but a young lady ought 
not to get herself talked about. You were out all 
day yesterday, and no responsible person with 
you. ’ ’ 

“But why should people talk? I was only seeing 
the country, looking at the fields and finding out 
things I ought to know. ’ * 

“Yes, it was all right, only it looks better for you 
to have some older person with you. Some of the 
men were saying that you were a bonn}’’ lass, and 
very clever for your years, but you needed some one 
to look after you or you would get into trouble. ’ ' 

Now, is not that a great idea! When I am so 


34 


In Prime, 


happy because I am so free and no one to say “Do 
this” and “Do that,” why need some one come to 
make me miserable? Besides, I do not know a 
single person, such as Mrs. Tate has in mind. I did 
want Esther to come with me, — still she is only a 
little older than I am, athough she is ever so much 
wiser. I do wish I knew some competent person to 
tell me what is best 

To-day I drove to the city to do some shopping. 
Parsons went with me. Besides a number of new 
dresses, it seems I needed half a dozen pairs of 
gloves, as many pairs of shoes, and an unlimited 
supply of ribbons, laces, as well as two more 
hats. Dear me! Wouldn’t Mrs. Bradford be 
amazed if she saw me in possession of such a lot of 
things? I left the dresses with a dressmaker whom 
Parsons recommended. We were in the city the 
whole day, and came home tired out. I had spent 
more than the cost of all my clothes since mamma 
died. 


CHAPTER III. 


June — , 1 8 — . — 

It is nine o’clock in the morn- 
ing*. I promised to write to Esther at the end of the 
week and have just finished the letter. She will 
have many wise things to say about what I have 
told her, so I will copy the letter in my journal for 
reference when her answer comes. 

Sunset Park, June 29th, 18 — . 

Dear Esther: — It seems a long time since I saw 
you. I so much wish I could be with you to-day, 
and tell you all I think and feel, and then listen to 
what you would say to me. Since that cannot be, I 
must content myself with writing. 

The accompanying copy of my journal will tell 
you how I have spent the week. You will also want 
to know about my journey. 

After bidding you good-bye I looked back and 
saw you standing at the door. I can see your face 
yet; it came with me all along the journey, and 
looks at me kindly as I write ; it almost seems as if 
I should hear you speak. We soon came to the end 
of the familiar drive from Fledding to the station, 
— my ticket was bought and my trunk checked. 
When once on the train, the fact that I was fairly 
launched into the great world, troubled me. Then 
the thought came that Fledding was behind and 
home before me. Except for the regret that I was 
parting with you, I was well content that it should 
be so. 


35 


36 


In Primo. 


Soon I began to notice my surroundings, and found 
we were out in the country — just then passing 
through a grove, and I hoped there would be plenty 
of woods about my new home. Presently we were 
passing fields and farm houses, all looking so quiet 
and pleasant that I was glad the home I was going 
to was in the country. Further on was a little 
town where there was quite a bustle, people getting 
on and off the cars. 

It was now about eight o’clock. As we went on, 
fields, woods, rivers, creeks and hills diversified the 
scene. On a country road I saw a number of chil- 
dren who were evidently going to school, as they 
were carrying books, lunch baskets and pails. They 
were barefooted, the girls wearing calico sun- 
bonnets, and all seemed very happy. 

While waiting to change cars at crossing B , I 

thought about how often I had heard you speak of 
the weary hour and a half you always spent there 
when going away for your vacation. 

In the afternoon it grew quite dark and cloudy and 
soon after began to rain. The gloomy evening 
made me very lonely. 

Many people on the train were very social and 
seemed to get acquainted with each other; one or 
two spoke kindly to me, and a lady offered to share 
her luncheon. I thanked her and told her I had 

my dinner at J . I am so unused to strangers it 

gives me quite a start when they speak to me ; my 
face burns and I do not know what to say. 

At four o’clock in the afternoon came another 
hour of waiting to make connections with a belated 
train; all these trains are very slow. At last we 


In Primo. 


37 


reached Hampton. My heart beat hard when I rose 
to leave the train. I was quite stiff, too, from 
sitting so long. It was quite dark on the station 
platform, as the only light was a lantern carried by 
the station master. As soon as I was off the train 
the conductor called out “All aboard,” and the cars 
disappeared in the darkness. Just then a man 
carrying an open umbrella stepped up, inquiring: 

“Is this Miss Seymour?” 

I answered, “Yes.” 

“The carriage is here waiting for you.” 

When I was seated in the carriage, I asked ; 

“Will my trunk be sent to-night?” 

“Yes, Miss, the wagon is here to carry it.” 

After a two-mile drive through the mud, rain and 
darkness, we reached Sunset Park. You will learn 
the rest from my journal. 

Parsons is very impatient for my new dresses to 
come. She, herself, has made the blue lawn I 
brought from Fledding into a very pretty frock, 
which she pronounces perfect. Parsons seems to be 
in her element when arranging my gowns or 
assisting at my toilet. She is very anxious to have 
me look nice, but try as she will, she can never 
make me handsome. I never supposed there was 
anything unusual about my hair, but Parsons 
greatly admires it, and it pleases her to call it 
golden. She takes great pains with it, and some- 
times seems disappointed that I am not more 
enthusiastic over the results of her efforts. As 
there has been no one to care particularly, I have 
never given much attention to my appearance, 
beyond trying to look tidy, which I always thought 


38 


In Primo. 


to be a duty. However, as Mrs. Tate and Parsons 
seem interested in the matter, I can at least try to 
please them, especially since Parsons takes all the 
trouble upon herself. 

Speaking of Mrs. Tate reminds me of what she 
said about my having an older person with me as a 
companion. I do not just fancy the idea, but would 
like your advice. Esther, I need you so much, and 
cannot understand why you did not come when I so 
wanted you. I am sure it would have been 
pleasanter for you than to spend your vacation at that 
little farm house. So far as my coming here alone 
to learn to depend upon myself is concerned, I do 
not see how your going off there and my having 
another person here for a companion will help 
matters. 

Please tell me all you think I ought to know. 
You are my only friend, and I so long to hear from 
you. Your loving 

JULIA. 

Evening. — After breakfast this morning, I re- 
ceived a letter from Mr. Markham, saying that he 
and the lawyer who has always attended to Mr. 
Clayton’s legal matters are coming Monday to place 
before me such statements as are necessary in order 
that I may understand the value of my estates, the 
amount of money invested in business enterprises, 
and cash placed to my credit in the bank ; also, to 
inform me as to the character of the various enter- 
prises in which a portion of my money is invested. 

It appalls me to think I have so much property. 
I do not know what to do with it — am afraid I may 


In Prlmo. 


39 


not use it wisely; then, too, Mrs. Howard’s letter 
has impressed me still more deeply as to my 
responsibility. If I had just this place, I think I 
could manage it well and enjoy it too When I told 
Mrs. Tate these people were coming, she asked: 

“What arrangements do you want made?” 

“Arrangements for what?” 

“What arrangements do you want made for their 
entertainment? What rooms will they have? How 
long will they remain?” 

“Oh, — why — just what you think best. You 
know better than I do. ” 

“No, I want you to decide these things; you are 
the mistress, and these gentlemen are your guests. 
I cannot settle such matters, but I will do whatever 
you may wish.” 

So we looked over the rooms, selected the ones to 
be used and arranged about the meals. When 
this was done Mrs. Tate turned to me with a very 
grave look, and said : 

“My dear, I suppose Mr. Clayton trusted these 
men who are coming or he would not have em- 
ployed them. Please do not be offended if I say 
that it is best to be careful about business affairs ; do 
not consent to any arrangements until you under- 
stand them and they suit you. ’ ’ 

“I am afraid there is a great deal to understand, 
and I am very ignorant about such matters. ’ ’ 

“Poor lamb! You are quite alone in the world, 
and great responsibilities rest upon you. But you 
have an honest face, and I know by your bonnie 
blue eyes that you have a good heart. Trust in the 
Lord and He will help you,” 


40 


In Primo. 


Such a great sense of loneliness rushed upon me. 
I felt that my inexperience placed me at a great 
disadvantage. If I only had my mother! Throw- 
ing my arms about Mrs. Tate’s neck, I burst into 
tears ; she held me close to her and said : 

“There, there, dear! I did not mean to make you 
cry.” 

“No, no, you did not; but I have no friends, — no- 
body ever cared for me but you and Esther Berkely. ” 

“Why, how is that? Did you not have friends at 
school?” 

“Oh, I was just a poor orphan girl, and no one 
ever talked much to me, — only Esther.” 

“But, — Mrs. Bradford I think you called her — 
what about her?’' 

“She was always busy, and only had time to tell 
me what she wanted me to do. ’ ’ 

“What about the girls? Did you not join them in 
their amusements?” 

“Why, you know I was poor and had to work for 
my board and clothes. Fledding is called a 
seminary, but Mrs. Bradford conducts it on the plan 
of European boarding-schools and receives pupils 
of all ages. There are some small girls, and a 
number of children who attend as day pupils are 
taught with them. I was a sort of nursery teacher 
and general help to the matron, or any one who 
needed me, — in a certain sense I was a servant, and 
the girls did not care to have me with them. When 
I was not working I spent my leisure studying, for 
I wanted to graduate.” 

“Did you have no holidays when you could go out 
and make friends outside?” 


In Primo. 


41 


“The holidays were the busiest times, for then 
many of the other helpers were away, and I had to 
assist in getting things in order by the time the 
next term began. ’ ’ 

“Did Mr. Clayton’s family never see you, nor 
write to you?” 

“No.” 

“Did they know how you were living?” 

“I suppose so, for Mr. Clayton took me there and 
arranged that the money mamma left me should 
pay for my board, clothes and education until I was 
fifteen years old ; after that I was to work for my 
support and instruction. ’ ’ 

“Why did you not live at Mr. Clayton’s?” 

“After mamma died, I lived at Mr. Clayton’s a 
year. Mrs. Clayton said I made her nervous 
because I crept around so slowly and never looked 
happy; her daughters, Catherine and Maude, said 
they were ashamed of me, I looked so dull in my 
black dress and always said such stupid things when 
spoken to ; so they did not want me. ” 

“Poor child! You have had a hard life; but now 
you have all poor Mr. Clayton’s property.” 

“It is very sad that all his children should have 
died; he loved them so much. I believe he him- 
self died quite suddenly, or perhaps I would not 
have been here. ’ ’ 

“Yes, the shock of Mr. Francis’ death was too 
great. He had apoplexy and never spoke again. 
His will had been made some time before, giving his 
property to his son ; there were, however, handsome 
legacies left to different members of his wife’s 
family. ’ ’ 


42 


In Prime. 


“Had he known Frank would die, I suppose he 
would have left it all to them. ’ ’ 

“Perhaps, — yet it is right you should have it, for 
the money came from your great grandfather. I 
have heard that he disinherited your grandmother; 
and as there were but herself and her brother, John 
Clayton, he had all the property. ’ ’ 

“That is true. Grandmamma displeased her 
parents by marrying an artist who was poor. ’ ’ 
“What was your grandfather’s name?” 

“Edgar Whittington.” 

“And your father was a lawyer.” 

“Yes. He had only money enough to enable him 
to complete his law studies. He was graduated from 
college before his father’s death. I was only one 
year old when papa died. He was getting on very 
fast with his profession, but had not saved any 
money, so mamma and I went to live with Grand- 
papa Whittington.” 

“Do you remember your grandpapa?” 

“No, he died when I was three years old. We 
remained with grandmamma in her pretty little 
cottage of six rooms, besides the small one for the 
servant. ” 

“That was very little room for four people.” 
“Yes, but grandmamma managed well. The 
kitchen was only ten feet square, but in the large 
basement was a laundry, cellar, cistern and many 
nicely furnished closets. Besides the kitchen there 
were two rooms, each fourteen feet square. These 
rooms, which had folding doors between them, were 
furnished like double parlors. In the back parlor 
were some very handsome book-cases, containing 


In Primo. 


43 


choice books. In this room, also, were grand- 
mamma’s rosewood writing desk and a beautiful 
round, pearl-inlaid table, from which, when it was 
to be used as a dining table, we removed books and 
ornaments. ’ ’ 

“So you made the rooms serve as dining-room, 
parlor and library. ’ ’ 

“Yes, and they were very pretty.” 

Mrs. Tate’s interest was so genuine that it was a 
pleasure to tell her all I knew of my family. I 
described to her how daintily and happily my 
grandparents lived in the two small and scantily 
furnished rooms in which they began their married 
life. I even told her of their close economy — keep- 
ing no servant and deciding to buy furniture only as 
they were able to purchase something good; so, as 
they could get the money, they bought a piece at a 
time, always choosing the very best. In this way, 
what they had was always excellent, and in a few 
years they furnished their little cottage beautifully. 

Mrs. Tate seemed so pleased to have me confide 
in her that I also told her of the bric-a-brac grand- 
mamma had when she began housekeeping, gifts 
from old-time friends ; among them three fine china 
cups and saucers, and four exquisite china plates; 
and that, as grandpapa had some choice pieces of 
silver that had belonged to his mother, they got on 
until they were able to procure more. 

“Your mother was an only child?” 

'‘Yes, and they took great pains with her educa- 
tion. She was a fine musician.” 

“I have asked a great many questions. Please 
excuse me. There is that about you which draws 


44 


In Prime. 


my heart towards you, and I shall soon love you as 
if you were my own bairn.” 

“Oh, I like to tell you these things. I never told 
them to any one before, except Esther ; but I think 
them over and over, having no one to talk to, and 
thinking so much of what mamma used often to tell 
me, makes me remember all so well, I suppose.” 

“Well, dear, do not forget what I told you about 
the agent and lawyer who are coming Monday. I 
want you to let them see that you are a young lady, 
not a thoughtless, frivolous girl; and that it is your 
intention to look into the whys and wherefores of 
things ; so that when you do decide upon any course 
they will know that you have good reason for doing 
so.” 

“Thank you, Mrs. Tate, for your advice. I will 
try to follow it. ’ ’ 

I do not know anything to say to these men who 
are coming on Monday. Mrs. Tate says I must 
take my place at the table as hostess, be polite and 
kind, and all will be well. 

As to the business interview that I dread so much, 
since I am so ignorant about such matters, I will 
not assume that I know more than I do, but will 
simply listen attentively and ask questions when I 
do not understand ; if I am uncertain what I ought 
to do, I will exercise my privilege of deferring a 
decision. Esther said that for this first year I must 
not be in a hurry to do things, nor make rash 
decisions; but just grow into my position. 

July—, i8— 

To-day, Mrs. Tate, Parsons and I 
went to church. I wore my pretty brown dress and 


In Primo. 


45 


hat to match that Esther selected for me last week. 
That seems a long time ago. 

This Methodist Church is the queerest church I 
ever saw. It is just an oblong room, with the seats 
all in rows facing the preacher, and two seats on 
either side of the pulpit. There is but one desk, 
and from that the preacher read, prayed and 
preached. He wore neither robe nor surplice, but 
just an ordinary suit of black clothes. It was very 
unlike the Episcopal service at Fledding. No 
prayer books were used, the preacher simply stand- 
ing up and reading a hymn, which was sung by the 
congregation and the choir, who occupied the seats at 
the left of the pulpit ; after which he read a chapter 
from the Bible, and offered extemporaneous prayer ; 
this was followed by another hymn. The minister 
then preached a sermon, which was also extempo- 
raneous ; after again offering prayer, the last hymn 
was sung and we were dismissed with the 
benediction. 

The sermon was certainly a strange discourse. 
The preacher talked about having in our own 
hearts the evidence that we are saved. He seemed 
to mean that unless we have this we are not 
Christians. I have no witness in my heart that I 
am saved; I was baptized when a baby and con- 
firmed when ten years old. They called me a 
Christian, and I supposed I was. 

Mrs. Tate is a Methodist, and she says the 
Methodists believe in conversion, by which they mean 
a change of heart. I asked her : 

“What do you mean by a ‘change of heart’?'* 

“Why, all are sinners, and unless they repent 


46 


In Primo. 


and receive forgiveness for their sins they will be 
lost” 

“Are my sins forgiven? Do you think I am 
saved?” 

“I do not know; only the Lord can tell you 
that. ’ ' 

“How will he tell me? I have been baptized, and 
I have been confirmed, so I am a Christian. Are 
not all Christians saved?” 

“All saved persons are Christians, but being 
baptized or confirmed cannot save us.” 

“What then?” 

“Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt 
be saved. ’ ’ 

“I do believe on Him.” 

“Hast thou saving faith in Christ?” 

“I do not know. ” 

“When you know that, you are saved.” 

“But how can I know?” 

“Ask Him.” 

I do not understand all this. I would like to 
know that I am saved, but do not see how I can 
know it until I die. Then, of course, I shall know, 
for if I am saved I shall be in heaven, and if I am 
lost I shall be in torment. I think these Methodists 
must be mistaken, for God does not talk with men 
now, as in olden times. So how can I know? I 
think as soon as I hear from Esther I will write to 
her in regard to conversion. 


CHAPTER IV. 


July — , i8~.— 

Mr. Markham and Mr. Yates came 
this morning. The former is a large, well-propor- 
tioned man, about fifty years old, with an intelligent 
face. When he came to Fledding I was so bewil- 
dered I did not think much about his appearance or 
how I liked him ; but he seems a man one might 
trust. Mr. Yates is tall, and his thin hair and beard 
nearly all gray; I should judge him to be about 
sixty-five years old. As yet he makes no impres- 
sion on me. He has been Mr. James Clayton’s 
lawyer since his father died, and had been Mr. 
John Clayton’s lawyer for fourteen years. I received 
them in the parlor, and to my inquiries about their 
health and about their journey from the west, Mr. 
Yates replied briefly, but politely. Mr. Markham 
was more communicative, and after we sat down to 
luncheon began asking questions. 

“Do you like Sunset Park, Miss Seymour?” 

“Yes, very much, thank you.” 

“And what have you been doing?” 

“Oh, I have looked over the house and its con- 
tents, seen all the fields belonging to the place, and 
driven about the country ; I also have spent a day 
in the city. ’ ’ 

He gave me a quick, inquiring look, and said : 

“So you have been inspecting your farms?” 

“I was never in the country before and wanted to 
see what it is like.” 


47 


48 


In Primo. 


“Well, what do you think of it?” 

“I think I should like to be a farmer. I learned 
a great deal the day I was out. ” 

“May I ask what in particular 3^ou learned?” 
“The men told me many things about the 
machinery, farming implements, crops and stock, 
and how they do the work.” 

“Humph! So you talked with the laborers?” 
“Oh, yes, I talked with almost everybody. In a 
day or two I am going to see their wives; I want to 
know all about how they live, and ever^Thing 
connected with the place.” 

“Remember, you must be careful not to let them 
make you believe all they tell you; — one has to 
look out for these fellows. They always represent 
things to their own advantage. ’ ’ 

“I think they told me nothing wrong, for we only 
talked about the crops they had in, how they managed 
them, and the different sorts of machinery and tools 
used on the farms.” 

“Oh, yes, yes, I know how they talk when they 
find any one to listen to them ; but you would better 
not let them think you pay much attention to what 
they say. ’ ’ 

“Well, if I am in doubt about what they tell me, 
I have only to notice what others are doing and 
consult them. There are a great many small 
farmers in the neighborhood. ’ * 

“But you will not have leisure to give such close 
attention to agriculture. If you are like most young 
ladies, you will soon have social duties that will 
take up most of your time. ” 

“I think I shall stay right here for a year, at least. ” 


In Prime. 


49 


“What! Bury yourself here? That will never 
do. You must go to New York and see your man- 
sion there, one of the finest in the city. They will 
never get you back here after you have seen that.’' 

“I am in no hurry to go to the city. It is quiet 
here and I want to stay until I am rested from all 
the years I have worked so hard.” 

“You know,, you will have to go to New York to 
see what is to be done with that residence. It is 
shut up now, and all has been left just as it was 
when Mr. Clayton died.” 

“I will think it over, and before you leave will 
let you know when I think it best to come to the 
city to attend to it.” 

Mr. Markham gave me another quick, surprised 
look, as we arose from the table and returned to 
the parlor. 

The gentlemen spent the afternoon driving out 
inspecting the farms, the park and woods ; on their 
return they went through the barns and stables. 

At dinner they talked about home and foreign 
affairs. As I know very little about these matters, 
I could not take much part in the conversation. 
Had they been speaking on historical subjects 1 
should have been quite at home, for Esther taught 
me history. One day she astonished me by saying 
I was her brightest pupil in that subject. How 
gratified I felt ! It was the first compliment I had ever 
received. I must take papers and magazines and 
inform myself of daily events. 

After dinner we had some music, and the gentle- 
men complimented me as a musician. I fear they 
are mistaken, for Miss Miller, the music teacher, 


50 


In Prime. 


never looked pleased when she gave me my music 
lessons, and once I heard her say: 

“I did not engage to teach music to girls like 
Julia. ” 

I tried my best to learn, only I had so little time 
to practice. This is a good piano, and I think I 
must use it more. Mamma intended I should be a 
musician like herself. Poor Mamma! If she were 
only here how happy we should be ! 

To-morrow morning after breakfast comes the 
dreaded interview. 

July i8— 

After breakfast, Mr. Markham, 
Mr. Yates and myself, repaired to the library. 
The room hardly deserves the name. There are 
a few old and rather mouldy books in the cases, the 
carpet is faded, in some places even worn through ; 
the writing desk is shabby, and the few leather- 
covered chairs and sofa are much dilapidated. But 
the room had been well swept and dusted, so it 
was clean. I shall give this library early attention, 
hoping to make it at least a comfortable study. 

Mr. Markham read over a list of the mills and 
factories that have fallen into my hands; stated the 
several amounts of money invested in banks and 
wholesale houses, and I found I had a small interest 
even in shipping. He also presented a paper 
showing how many tenement houses I own, and 
another containing a statement of the amount 
deposited to my credit in the bank, from which I 
may draw for general expenses during the year; it 
seems, too, that I have considerable real estate be- 
sides this at Sunset Park. 


In Primo. 


51 


Mr. Markham then proceeded to say that he 
thought all business enterprises were going on well, 
except some of the mills. He advised selling one 
of these, suggested certain changes in the manage- 
ment of two others, and asked if I approved of the 
same. I felt terribly embarrassed by the question, 
for I knew nothing about the matter. So I said : 

“Mr. Markham, I am quite inexperienced in the 
conduct of business, and know nothing whatever 
about mills. However, it seems to me, that 
until I can understand it more thoroughly it will be 
best to make no changes, except in cases where 
there are losses instead of gains. Owing to my 
present lack of knowledge, I see no way but for me 
to rely upon your judgment in this matter. I hope 
soon to have a better understanding of my affairs.” 

He stared at me a moment, and said, “Very 
well, I will then consider myself authorized to 
proceed with the mills as I have suggested.” 

“Mr. Markham, will you please leave those state- 
ments with me so I can study them at my leisure?” 

“I cannot spare these papers; I have no dupli- 
cates and need them to guide me in the conduct of 
your affairs. ’ ' 

“At least let me have them during the time you 
are here. ’ * 

“Now, Miss Seymour, that is all very well for a 
pastime at present ; but really you can employ your 
time to better advantage than in poring over these 
dull figures. You will soon grow tired of the 
business and throw it all back on my hands anyway, 
and you may as well save yourself and me the extra 
trouble.” 


52 


In Primo. 


“I should like to have the papers a few hours.” 

“Tut! tut! You are only a school girl. What 
can you understand about such matters?” 

Nevertheless, he arranged the papers and handed 
them to me. I could hardly breathe, I was so 
frightened at my own boldness. I don’t care! I 
intend to be mistress of my own affairs, and not a 
mere figurehead. 

Then Mr. Yates produced a number of contracts 
and other business agreements, for me - to sign. 
He read them over rapidly, and then placed them 
before me. 

“Why, I have not understood any of these 
papers!” I objected. “I must read them over by 
myself before I sign them.” 

There was not the least change in the expression 
of his face when I said this ; he simply turned to Mr. 
Markham, as much as to say: 

“Well, what will you have done?” 

Mr. Markham stood up, folded his arms behind 
him, and, looking at me, exclaimed : 

“Miss Seymour, it is impossible for you to under- 
stand these things ! It will be better for you to be 
guided by us, and trust to our doing what is best.” 

“I have no reason to do otherwise than trust you, 
and I expect to be guided by you, at least until I 
can guide myself. Still, I want to understand those 
papers, and until I do, I cannot sign them.” 

“But there is no time. It is now two o’clock — 
luncheon time — and we must leave here to-morrow 
morning.” 

“Very well, leave them with me and I will send 
them to you by post.” 


In Primo. 


53 


“But the other parties to these contracts are 
waiting for them and must have them immediately. ’ ’ 

“Then please let me have them this afternoon. I 
will try to get through with them in time for you to 
take them back to-morrow. ’ ’ 

“But there are other matters to be placed before 
you which must be attended to before we go. ’ ’ 

“I am sorry I did not know how much there is to 
understand. I ought to have been at work on this 
yesterday and last evening." 

“We could not have attended to it yesterday, as 
we had other matters to look after." 

Luncheon was now ready, and we returned to the 
dining-room. I was hot, flustered and awkward. 
Mr. Markham was treating me like a child, and I 
was not pleased. Surely I had a right to know 
about my own affairs, and I was quite resolved to do 
so. I think he is perfectly honest and will con- 
duct the business wisely, but I must understand 
things. If Mr. Markham should die I never could 
get things straight. At the table he stirred me up 
still more by saying : 

“Now, Miss Seymour, don’t trouble your pretty 
head about things you can’t understand. Wait until 
you get a husband and he will see to things for 
you. ’ ’ 

Between fright and indignation I was trembling, 
and could hardly control my voice as I replied: 

“ I do not expect to have a husband very soon, and 
consider it my duty to understand my own affairs, 
and think myself perfectly capable of doing so.’’ 

“Oh, now, you must not feel provoked at an old 
business man for advising you to let hard work 


54 


In Prinio. 


alone, and have a good time like other young ladies. 
I know that it is the fashion for them to be very 
wise and capable, and to play at being business 
women, but they generally do more harm than good. ” 

“Well, if I am not capable of understanding my 
business affairs, I will sell all the property except 
Sunset Park, withdraw my money from other 
business enterprises and deposit the proceeds in 
banks. Surely I shall be able to compute the 
interest as it accrues. I would not be altogether 
unhappy if Sunset Park were my only possession.” 

After that little more was said until we returned 
to the library, when they presented a contract for 
me to sign by which I would agree to employ Mr. 
Markham as my agent for five years. It also con- 
tained a statement as to the amount of salary he 
should receive and bound us both to certain obliga- 
tions. I said: 

“Mr. Markham, I am willing tQ enter into such an 
agreement for one year, but not for five.” 

“What is your objection?” 

He looked not only surprised, but embarrassed 

“Nothing, — only at the end of a year you may 
prefer not to attend to matters for me ; and I may 
find it better to make a change.” 

He twisted around on the old chair, said “Ahem!” 
two or three times, and then continued : 

“Mr. Clayton always entered into five-years agree- 
ments with me, and I supposed, of course, you 
would wish to do the same.” 

“No, I do not; you and Mr. Clayton understood 
and suited each other; we do not know how it will 
be with us. ” 


In Prime. 


55 


Mr. Yates also produced a five years* contract, 
remarking : 

“I, too, as the old contracts expired, entered into 
a five years’ agreement with both Mr. James Clayton 
and his father. What is your wish in my case. 
Miss Seymour?” 

‘‘The same as in that of Mr. Markham. I am 
willing to sign a contract with the privilege of 
renewal at the end of the year if both parties are 
satisfied.” 

Mr. Markham inquired: 

‘‘Have you any other legal adviser or agent in 
mind?” 

‘‘None. I shall certainly give the preference to 
you and Mr. Yates, if all parties are satisfied.” 

“Who advised you to this course?” 

“No one. I did not know it would be necessary to 
make such contracts. I have resolved to undertake 
little more this year than to try to understand my 
new responsibilities and to grow into my position. 
Therefore I do not wish to bind myself to any- 
thing beyond this one year. I cannot sign this con- 
tract as it is. ’ ’ 

“You will find many of the contracts read this 
morning are for five years, — some for ten years.” 

“That is why I want to study them and discuss 
them with you. I suppose business interests make 
such contracts necessary, but your business relations 
with me do not require it. You will proceed just 
the same this year as though the contract were for 
five years ; if at the end of the year all is satisfactory, 
we can renew for five years; if not, there will be 
no embarrassment. ’ ’ 


56 


In Primo. 


“Are you led to this decision because I have 
advised you not to take upon yourself business 
anxieties?” 

“Not at all. I was provoked at the things you 
said, but thought you were advising me to do what 
you believed to be best. You do not understand me 
yet, that is all. I am only carrying out my policy of 
not committing myself to more than is necessary for 
this one year. ’ ’ 

“Then I suppose it will have to be so. One other 
matter, — do you not intend to engage an older lady 
as a companion and chaperon? It seems hardly 
proper for you to live here alone with servants. ’ ’ 

“I am considering the matter.” 

“Should you desire to engage such a lady, I know 
of one I shall be happy to recommend, * ’ added Mr. 
Yates. 

“Thank you. If I decide to have her I will let 
you know. ’ ’ 

I did not consider it necessary to tell him I had 
already written to Esther on the subject, and would 
prefer to leave this matter in her hands to arrange. 

It was now five o’clock. Taking the statements 
and contracts to my room, I began copying them 
into a blank book, working diligently until the 
dinner bell rang. During dinner the conversation 
turned upon the Clayton family, and Mr. Markham 
incidentally remarked that Mr. Frank Clayton had 
taken a thorough law course. His father had 
earnestly desired him to do so, believing it would 
be of great advantage to him in conducting the 
affairs of the estates, and business generally. I 
said: 


In Primo. 


57 


“Indeed, I think it would. Why could not I get 
some law books and read them? Surely, it would 
help me to understand much of what I now know 
so little.'* 

Mr. Markham returned: “There is a fine set of 
law books in the splendid library in your New 
York house. By the way, — when do you intend 
coming to the city to see the place? It needs early 
attention. ' ’ 

“I am planning to come in about two v^eeks.” 

“Well, I will have the establishment in running 
order. Whatever additional arrangements are 
needed can be attended to afterward. When you 
have acquainted yourself with the place and have 
things to your mind, you can retire to some summer 
resort until cool weather, and then return to take up 
your residence there permanently. It is a very fine 
house and the appointments always have been 
unexceptionable. ’ ’ 

“Oh, I am only coming to see the place and what 
is there, and decide what is to be done with it 
during the year I spend here. ’ ' 

“I never supposed you would think of spending 
your winter here. I recommended your coming to 
the Park because it was on your way to New York, 
and could be put in readiness sooner than any other 
place, — and also convenient for Mr. Yates and myself 
on our return from California. By the way, I 
wonder why Mr. Clayton placed you in that out of 
the way school, with so many superior educational 
institutions in the East! Why did he take you to 
that sleepy old town?” 

“I do not suppose any of the schools you mention 


58 


In Prime. 


would have taken me on the terms he was able to 
make at Fledding.” 

“How was that?” 

When I told him how I was situated at Fledding 
he seemed much surprised and hastened to say : 

“I supposed Mr. Clayton kept you in school. Did 
he never help you beyond paying the two hundred 
dollars a year until you were fifteen years old?” 

“He did not pay that. When grandpapa died he 
left us the cottage we lived in and five thousand 
dollars, with which we bought two houses that 
we rented. The next year grandmamma died 
and mamma fell ill. Grandmamma’s illness and 
death, her own long and serious illness, and our 
living expenses, involved mamma in debt. To 
pay this she was obliged to sell the two rented 
houses, and supplementing the interest from the 
remaining three thousand dollars by teaching 
music, she managed to obtain an income of four 
hundred dollars a year. When I was six years old 
our cottage burned, and after three years, during 
which time we were both sick a great deal, mamma 
died, leaving but one thousand dollars. With this 
Mr. Clayton paid for my board and schooling at 
Mrs. Bradford’s, as I told you.” 

“Hum! Yes, I see.” 

After dinner I excused myself and have written 
all this while it is fresh in my memory. Now I 
must go to work again upon those business papers. 


CHAPTER V. 


July— i8— 

This morning at breakfast I asked 
Mr. Markham to arrange for my entertainment at 
some hotel when I came to the city, telling him I 
would bring my maid, and possibly Mrs. Tate. He 
seemed not to approve the arrangement, but did not 
try to dissuade me from my plans. 

I spent most of the forenoon resting, as I was 
very tired, having sat up until four o’clock this 
morning copying those papers. This afternoon I 
had such a dear letter from Esther, and as it 
answers many of my questions, I will copy it into 
my journal. 

L — , July I St, 1 8 — . 

My dear Julia: — I received your letter this morn- 
ing, and hasten to reply. 

Although I was deeply moved by the pathos 
which, unconsciously to yourself, runs all through 
your letter, I was delighted with the evidence it 
gave that I have not been mistaken in my estimate 
of your ability ; and difficult as the position is likely 
to prove to a conscientious, sensible girl like your- 
self, still your strength of character and good 
common sense will enable you to rise equal to 
every emergency. 

Yes, it is delightful to have a good home of one’s 
very own. I was not surprised at your giving free 
course to your joy on your twenty-first birthday, 
and your first real holiday ; I knew you were a girl 

59 


6o 


In Prime. 


of deep feeling, capable of strong and genuine 
enthusiasm; having lived such a pent-up life, you 
never before had anything over which to enthuse 
and rejoice. I sympathize with you with all my 
heart. 

I am pleased to know that you have a good, 
capable maid, and that she is so interested in your 
appearance. You are rather inclined to disregard 
the advantages of making a good personal appear- 
ance, although neat and tidy you will always be, for 
it is not in your nature to be otherwise. I am not 
in the least afraid of making you vain by telling 
you that you have natural attractions, which, with a 
little attention to what is becoming, will render you 
a very pleasing girl. Parsons is right, — your hair 
is beautiful. I used to long to arrange it in a way 
that would show it to best advantage. Your eyes 
are unusually good, both as to color and shape, and 
they are very expressive. Your full, white fore- 
head, contrasted with your red lips, gives you at 
once an intellectural and sweet, womanly look. 
When the sweet country air has somewhat rounded 
out and colored your cheeks, you will be an attract- 
ive young lady. I always admired your shapely, 
firm white hands, and although you were so busily 
employed at Fledding, the work was not of a sort 
that spoiled them. I used to imagine how your 
slender, arched foot would look in a well fitting 
boot. But I saw that your thoughts were far from 
these things, and that it would only startle and 
embarrass you if I mentioned them. 

I want you to remember that it is every woman’s 
duty, as well as privilege, to look well. Very few 


In Primo. 


6i 


have been so badly treated by nature, that, with a 
little attention to harmony of color and appropriate 
arrangement, they may not make themselves beauti- 
ful women. It is not entirely a matter of money, 
undue labor and time. A little observation, study 
and care will transform the plainest looking farmer’s 
wife into a woman of attractive appearance. I 
expect you to give such attention to these matters as 
will enable you to give pleasure to beauty-loving 
people. 

I highly approve of your having a companion. 
Of course you must have the right sort of a person. 
You need some one who will love you, and who has 
judgment and experience enough to give you wise 
counsel; you do not need a governess, — nor one who 
will attempt to curtail your liberty, or interfere 
with your affairs ; but a companion in every sense of 
the word. She ought to be one whom you can trust 
as a confidential friend; to whom you can go in 
perplexity and trouble, and unrestrainedly open 
your heart, sure of help and sympathy. It may 
be difficult to find just such a person, but I have 
written to Mrs. Howard, asking if she knows some 
one suitable for the position. She has the head and 
heart to understand just what you need; her large 
circle of acquaintances will afford her abundant 
opportunity to make inquiry. She usually writes 
me a Christmas letter, and I reply with a vacation 
budget ; so, ere many days I hope we shall have this 
matter settled to the satisfaction of all concerned. 

You say you cannot understand my reasons for 
not accepting your urgent invitation to make my 
future home with you, and I am not sure I can make 


62 


In Prime. 


it clear to you, therefore I have not tried to explain 
myself more fully. The time will come when you 
will understand and approve of my course. 

No doubt, for the present, it would be very 
pleasant for us to live together, but in the end I 
think it would not be best for either of us; for you, 
I am certain, it would be a mistake. Were I with 
you, you would continue for some time to depend 
upon me, as you do now, thus retarding your 
development into a self-reliant, capable woman. As 
for myself, in a few years at most, you will outgrow 
your need of me, and although you would never 
admit it, yet I know I should feel that I had become 
a mere dependent upon you. Then, having so long 
been out of regular work, it would be difficult to 
begin again, if, indeed, I could find an opening. 

So, all things considered, I have concluded that it 
is best for you, in a quiet way, to launch out upon 
your own responsibility. You will probably make 
some mistakes, but you will not be slow in com- 
prehending new situations, nor in seeing your way 
through emergencies. Moreover, you will not be 
beyond the reach of such assistance as I can render. 

I wanted to tell you something of the place I am 
in, and of the quiet, restful time I am having, but 
this letter is already long, and I must close. You 
must write to me soon. As ever. 

Yours with love, 

ESTHER BERKELY. 

Dear Esther, what would I do without her? She 
has thought everything out for me as usual, and I 
have more important matters to ask her about, so I 
will write her at once. 


In Primo. 


63 


Sunset Park, July 3d, 18 — . 

My dear Esther: — I have just finished copying 
your letter into my journal. I thank you very 
much for all the complimentary and encouraging 
things in your letter. I especially thank you for 
undertaking the arrangement about the securing of 
a companion for me, since this seems necessary. I 
am glad to follow your advice in this, as in every 
other matter. 

From my journal you will see how I have spent 
my time. I have now a very important thing to ask 
you about. You have read my account of last 
Sunday. I want you to tell me what you think 
about people who have been baptized and confirmed 
not being Christians. Esther, are you saved? If 
so, how do you know it? This thing troubles me. 
If I am saved and it is possible for me to know it, 
I want to know it right away. If I am not saved 
what shall I do? All this makes me rather nervous; 
I am afraid I may die and after all not be saved. 

Mr. Markham told me more of the particulars of 
Mr. Frank Clayton’s death. He was at Marseilles, 
and while out boating with a party of young men 
they came in collision with another boat. Frank 
and two others were drowned. Do you suppose 
Frank is saved? He died so suddenly! Frank was 
five years older than myself ; he was a large boy 
when I lived at Mr. Clayton’s. I liked him, for he 
never laughed at me, nor spoke crossly to me. 
Sometimes when we were alone he would show me 
pictures and tell me stories about them. I feel very 
sorry about him, and do hope he is in heaven. 

I think I have nothing more to tell you nowo 


64 


In Prime. 


but will write again next week. Please write to me 
as soon as you can ; I want to know all about how 
you are enjoying your vacation. You are my only 
friend and I long to hear from you. 

Your affectionate 

JULIA. 

July—, i8— 

To-day I attended the celebration 
of our national independence, which took the form 
of a Sunday-school picnic, in a grove the other side 
of the village. As the Fourth of July occurs during 
vacation, little was said about it at Fledding, Mrs. 
Bradford taking no interest in such matters ; so that, 
even in my own country, I am almost a foreigner, so 
far as understanding the sentiments and customs of 
my own countrymen is concerned. 

This, in connection with the fact that I am a 
stranger here, and that the people look curiously at 
me from a distance, made to-day’s experience a 
novel one. 

There were music and speeches, and, of course, 
the reading of the Declaration of Independence. 
The children, older people — everybody — seemed to 
enjoy themselves very much. If I am here next 
year I shall try to provide more comfortable seats, 
and otherwise add to the enjoyment of the day. If 
it had occurred to me, I would have furnished the 
Sunday-school a nice treat of fruits, ices and lem- 
onade. I must be more thoughtful. 

July—, i8— .— 

This evening I received the forms 
of contract from Mr. Markham and Mr. Yates. No 


In Primo. 


65 


duplicates were sent, so I wrote informing them 
that I noticed there were duplicates with all the 
contracts I signed the other day and I would be 
pleased if they would prepare the same of these. It 
will take some time to convince these gentlemen 
that I mean to do business in a business-like way. 
Evidently they think a “mere school-girl” will give 
no thought to serious matters, and that, in any 
case, it can make little difference. I am sure Mr. 
Clayton never signed contracts in this way. 

This forenoon, and part of this afternoon, I spent 
visiting the homes of the farmers who live on my 
land. Their wives showed me how they make 
butter, take care of fruit and do many other things 
connected with farm work. They were all very 
friendly, and seemed pleased to see me. I shall 
have no difficulty in understanding how farms 
should be managed, which will help me to deal 
justly with the people and at the same time exact 
honest dealing on their part. It pleases me, how- 
ever, that all my people seem kind and trustworthy. 
I must find out whether anything needs to be done 
to make their homes reasonably comfortable, and 
their work more convenient and profitable to them 
as well as to myself. 

This morning a note from Esther tells me she has 
found a lady, Mrs. Rodgers, who is to be my com- 
panion, if on meeting her I so decide. I have a 
letter from Mrs. Howard which encourages me to 
believe that Mrs. Rodgers is a very agreeable and 
congenial lady. I have written to her arranging 
that we meet in New York. 


66 


In Prime. 


Jrily — , i8— 

It rained all day Saturday and I 
stayed at home, read, rested and thought. As the 
rain continued yesterday we could not go to church, 
so I had rather a dull day. This morning an 
interesting letter from Esther has occupied my 
thought since breakfast. She writes as follows : 

L , July 5 th, i8— . 

My dear Julia: — Your second letter received. I 
have already written you about the place where I 
am spending my vacation and that Mrs. Howard 
has found a companion for you. Therefore, I will 
at once proceed with the subject of your inquiry. 

I never talk nor write much about religion, for it 
is such a sacred subject I do not feel worthy to do 
so. However, if my personal* thoughts and feelings 
will be of any help to you, I would not withhold 
them. 

I have never put the question to myself, “Am I 
saved?” Ever since I can remember, my mother 
taught me that God loved me. I cannot remember 
the time when I did not love God and want to please 
Him. I have always felt that I was His child and 
that He would take care of me. I have not been 
good at all times but, when sinful, I was so miser- 
able that I never "rested until I had sought for- 
giveness. Jesus died for sinners, and so when I 
have asked for forgiveness in His Name^ I have 
never doubted the power of that Name to procure 
pardon. It is such a mighty Name and represents 
such infinite love and holiness that it makes me 
tremble — not with fear — but with awe, whenever 
I speak or write it. I have never been afraid to die. 


In Primo. 


6 ^ 

— am not now, — why should I be? God made me, 
has always loved me. Jesus died to save me. Will 
They let me be lost when I have given them my life 
and trusted everything to them? 

I am not a theologian, but as I understand it, the 
Holy Spirit helps us to interpret the meaning of 
the Scriptures, and teaches us to pray, and 
witnesses, in our hearts, to God’s acceptance of us. 
From what I have read in the Bible I conclude that 
since the Holy Spirit has been sent into the world, 
He is all about us. Have you not heard the illustra- 
tion of the shipwrecked mariners? After drifting 
about at sea for several days, suffering intensely 
from thirst, they sighted a ship, and as soon as they 
came near enough to be heard, cried, “Bring us 
water, quick!'’ The people in the ship shouted 
back, “The fresh water is all about you! Dip and 
drink!’’ Without knowing it they had entered the 
mouth of a broad river ; the fresh water was there 
— was there in abundance — only they did not know 
it. So I think it is with the Holy Spirit. He is all 
about us, and we only have to depend upon Him to 
make the Holy Word plain; only to rely upon Him 
to teach us to pray and to lead us into all truth. 

As to the Methodists, I have seen something of 
them. Undoubtedly they are a good people, but 
their ways would not suit me. Before I began 

teaching I once visited a friend who lived in C . 

She had joined the Methodist church to which her 
husband belonged. While there I attended their 
service and was not favorably impressed with the 
difference between that church and the Episcopal. 
Neither their method of conducting service nor the 


68 


In Prime. 


manners of the people were pleasing to me. As 
you know, our people, on entering the church, 
kneel — not simply bow the head — but kneel a 
moment in silent prayer. In this Methodist 
church, here and there a person bowed the head a 
moment, while two or three knelt. The others, on 
entering, immediately sat down, arranged them- 
selves comfortably, and busied themselves reading 
the slips on which were printed the church notices, 
or in looking at other papers distributed among the 
pews; some actually talked in low tones or whispered 
to each other. One Sunday we were a little late, 
a dreadful thing to my mind, and so took a seat 
pretty well back in the row at the side of the pulpit, 
so that without effort I could see nearly all the 
congregation. Although I endeavored to fix my 
thoughts on sacred things, there was so much that 
was, to me, startling, that I could not help noticing 
what was going on around ure. 

After the sermon, which was really very good, 
and while the doxology was being sung, many of 
the congregation drew on their overcoats and stood 
hat in hand, waiting for the benediction; some of 
the ladies drew on their overshoes, and nearly all 
adjusted their wraps more or less, — ^buttoning their 
gloves, — so that there was a general rustle of 
preparation. One easily could have supposed that 
the moment the service closed the congregation was 
under some necessity of rushing out to catch a train, 
and that great calamity would result from missing 
it. But behold! The moment the benediction was 
pronounced, their haste was all over; yet, instead 
of the silent hush, the worshipers remaining a 


In Primo. 


69 


moment with bowed heads, and then, with reverent 
mien, passing out, as is the custom in our Church 
these Methodist people began smiling and chatting, 
shaking hands and visiting with friends, more as we 
would expect to see at a county fair than in a 
worshiping congregation, which had just been dis- 
missed. I also noticed that several pressed forward 
to the altar, and, shaking hands with the minister, 
engaged in an animated conversation. I afterwards 
learned from my friend’s husband that they were 
arranging for a meeting of the official board, and 
discussing the letting of a contract to repair the 
church. 

About fifteen minutes had passed when my 
friend invited me to accompany her to the class- 
meeting which was held in one of the class-rooms. 
This, too, was a new experience for me; I had 
indeed heard of Methodist class-meetings, but had 
never before attended one. There were, perhaps, 
fifty people in the room. Presently some one started 
a hymn, in which the others joined; the leader came 
forward and occupied the chair placed for him in 
front of the little company. After the singing he 
called on one of those present to offer prayer, after 
which he made a few remarks upon the sermon and 
declared the meeting open for any one who wished 
to “speak, or sing, or pray.” After rather an 
awkward pause, one after another rose and spoke at 
greater or less length, while occasionally a verse 
was sung. What most impressed me was a seeming 
lack of reverence. Two or three seemed to speak 
because of a great joy that compelled utterance, 
and I felt a great calm in my soul while I listened 


70 


In Prime. 


to their words. Some spoke so flippantly, one or 
two even attempting to say funny things; while 
others seemed to speak by rote, as if they had said 
the same thing many times; others repeated a verse 
or hymn. I would not judge them, but it impressed 
me that many of them did not realize that they were 
speaking of the “High and Holy One,” before 
whom Moses was commanded to take off his shoes. 
Their manner really made me feel faint and ill. I 
have heard wicked men curse and swear and it did 
not seem to me so awful as this familiar and 
stereotyped speaking of my Lord and Savior. There 
were a few young girls who tremblingly spoke short 
sentences, and with them I felt more in harmony. 
In the first place, I could understand how they 
shrank from thus calling attention to themselves. 
Only a strong, overpowering sense of duty could 
enable me thus to speak of matters so personally 
sacred. Then, too, they seemed to realize some- 
thing of the solemnity of the occasion when one 
takes it upon himself or herself to speak of matters 
relating to Jehovah! There was nothing in their 
words or manner of the almost seeming impertinence 
that characterized so many of the other speeches. 
Occasionally prayer was offered, few taking the 
trouble to kneel, the majority contenting them- 
selves with merely bowing the head. One old 
gentleman prayed very humbly, very devoutly, 
resting his claims on divine mercy upon the 
invitation given in the Bible. He was followed by 
a woman, who, in a loud, harsh voice, seemed com- 
manding the Lord to grant to her and those present 
what she desired; and after denouncing sinners and 


In Prime. 


71 


unfaithful professors, she called upon God to save 
them. Others, in praying, reiterated their 
sentences, and did not seem to realize the need of 
any spiritual blessing, but simply to feel it 
incumbent upon them to “take part” by offering 
prayer. At least I could not discover that any 
definite petition was offered. Beside me knelt a 
little girl about twelve years old. I could feel her 
trembling, and during one of the pauses she began 
praying. She offered praise and thanks to God 
because He loved her and gave His son to save her; 
she asked to be forgiven for her sins and to be 
made like Jesus. I felt so rested, — just as if I had 
offered the prayer, and great peace came into my 
heart. The little girl spoke so low and tremblingly 
that she was not heard three seats away, and before 
she finished her short petition a man began offering 
a loud and rambling prayer. His voice recalled me 
to my surroundings, but could not dispel the feeling 
that for a moment, at least, I had stood within the 
door of the Holy of Holies. 

When we came home my friends asked me how I 
enjoyed the services. I honestly told them how I 
had felt. 

“Oh,” said my friend, “that is just because you 
are prejudiced. ’ ’ 

“If that were the case,” I replied, “would I not 
have felt an objection to all that was said and 
done? As I was in sympathy with at least a part 
of what I heard, surely I am proved not guilty of 
prejudice.” 

“Well, of course you cannot expect people who 
speak in public only when in class or prayer- 


72 


In Primo. 


meeting, to speak in as concise and connected a 
manner as those who are accustomed to it.” 

“It was not the lack of eloquence or correctness 
that distressed me ; it was because so many seemed 
to have no knowledge of what they were trying to 
talk about, and their lack of realization of the 
sacredness of the subject and place.” 

One thing, of which I did not speak, has troubled 
me much, namely, that on the Lord’s Day, and in the 
house dedicated to His service, try as I would to 
hold my thoughts to heavenly things, I, myself, 
had not sufficient reverence to keep them from 
wandering to the things of which I have told you. 
Neither do I approve of criticising the efforts of 
people who were evidently performing what they 
considered to be their duty in the best way they 
knew. No doubt, on High their service was 
accepted as such. I think it was not wicked to 
feel keenly the irreverence manifested, nor to 
notice the difference in the spirit of the testimonies 
of those who seemed to speak whereof they knew, 
and of those who simply spoke because it seemed 
the thing to do. Yet, had I considered how the 
Lord accepts, not so much what we do as what we 
try to do, I would not have been so disturbed. 

However, as I said at the beginning, the ways of 
the Methodist people do not suit me. I can worship 
with more profit to myself spiritually, in the 
Episcopal Church, where there is not so much to 
distract my thoughts, nor tempt me to un-Christian 
criticism. 

I have never written nor said so much on this 
subject before. If it helps you in the least, I shall 


In Primo. 


73 


feel repaid, although I approached the subject feel- 
ing much as the Israelites were taught to feel con- 
cerning the touching of the Ark of God by any but 
the Levites. 

This letter Is very long. I am always eager to 
hear from you. Your loving friend, 

EwSTHER BERKELY. 


CHAPTER VI 


When going over Julia’s journal, and thus 
reviewing my own past life, I am much impressed 
with the truth that “No man liveth unto himself.’’ 
This is beautifully illustrated in Julia’s need and 
Mrs. Rodgers’ extremity occurring at the same 
time. I, also, was a gainer through their thus 
coming together, for Mrs. Rodgers became my 
dear and valued friend.. 

Mrs. Rodgers, whose maiden name was Emily 
Fowler, was the daughter of a college president. 

President Fowler was forty-five years old when he 
married Emily’s mother. When Emily was fifteen 
years of age, on account of failing health he 
resigned his position in the college. His wife died 
soon after. Placing Emily in a first-class boarding 
school, he removed with his little son, a boy ten 
years old, to California, where he boarded in the 
family of his youngest sister. 

When twenty years old Emily married Wilber 
Rodgers, a young minister of rising influence and 
power. She was well adapted to her position, and in 
her unostentatious way seconded her husband’s 
efforts to do good. 

Mrs. Rodgers was a quiet, retiring woman, whose 
life had been a sheltered one, but she was endowed 
with good judgment and warm sympathies. The 
afflicted and distressed found her ever ready to help 
with kind words and deeds. Probably her unassum- 
ing ministrations were all the more welcome because 

74 


In Primo. 


75 


they were performed so naturally and unobtrusively. 
Certain it is that many people who had hitherto 
repelled all offers of assistance, and who would 
rather perish than admit their needs, accepted 
help at the hands of Mrs. Rodgers. 

Many people who did not know her well, regarded 
Mrs. Rodgers as simply a good little woman, who 
“looked well to the ways of her house;’' and as 
being well educated and accustomed to good 
society; but they never supposed for a moment 
that she had a thought beyond her domestic con- 
cerns and such claims as society might make upon 
her. They would have been surprised had they 
known that her husband always considered her his 
best adviser, and discussed with her, not only his 
own affairs, but also the weightier matters and 
problems which engage the thought of a minister. 
Neither would they have found it easy to believe 
she had a minute and exhaustive knowledge of all , 
the benevolent enterprises of the city in which she 
lived, as well as of the church of which she was a 
unit. They never knew how many were uncon- 
sciously influenced by her to carry out schemes 
which she originated for the relief of the suffering. 
Certainly they never dreamed of the multitude of 
individual cases in which she interested herself. 
They did know, however, that she was a most 
winsome little woman, who drew and bound her 
people to her with strong and sincere love. None 
feared her; the little children were always appeal- 
ing to her with their childish wishes and hopes, and 
so thoroughly did she enter into the feelings and 
interests of the aged, that they forgot that they were 


76 


In Primo. 


older than she, — or, perhaps, that she was younger 
than they. 

Her presence in the sick room was a benediction. 
She always left sufferers quieter, more hopeful and 
happy. Yet, so gently, so unassumingly, so 
naturally did she pass in and out that they did not 
realize why they loved her, — they only knew that 
they did. 

At the time Mrs. Howard wrote to me of Mrs. 
Rodgers, she was about forty years old, and a 
widow, her husband having died a few months 
before. Like so many of his profession, the 
emergencies of the suffering people all around him 
were so urgently, so repeatedly, so constantly 
brought to his notice, that his financial resources 
were always exhausted. It had been his purpose to 
provide against the helplessness of old age, or the 
possibility of his wife’s being left a penniless widow. 
But the strong man was suddenly smitten by a fatal 
illness and died, leaving his plans unaccomplished. 

Some months later, on a sultry day in July, Mrs. 
Rodgers sat on a low rocking-chair near the window 
sewing. She was dressed in deep mourning, and 
her usually calm face looked pale and troubled. A 
young lady, also dressed in mourning, entered the 
small but daintily arranged sitting-room, and sat 
down near Mrs Rodgers. 

“Aunt Emily,” she began, “I have hurried 
through my packing so I could have the whole 
afternoon with you. It does not seem possible that 
I am to leave you to-morrow, and that we may 
never again have a home together.” 

“I am sorry you could not wait until Monday, 


In Primo. 


77 


but then you will get settled in your new place by 
Saturday evening and have Sunday to rest in, and 
to become accustomed to your new surroundings.” 

“Are your plans any more definite than they 
were a day or two ago?” 

“Yes, dear, so far as to know I must give up this 
cottage at once. I am sorry to tell you this, but 
you have a right to know it. I see no way to pay 
the rent, and under the circumstances, I dare not 
let a debt accumulate.” 

“But, Aunt Emily, where will you go? This is 
very sudden. I did not know you were so reduced 
financially. ” 

“I have been hoping there would be a favorable 
opening for me in some place where I could have 
a comfortable home, and in that case I would not 
need to tell you, for your young heart is sufficiently 
burdened without this additional anxiety. 

“I am not certain where I am going. Some time 
ago I wrote to two or three friends asking them to 
help me in securing some situation that I am capable 
of filling. If I do not hear from one of them by 
Monday, I must accept a situation as housekeeper 
offered me by a widower with a large family. 

“As you know, I am fond of children, but I have 
been so depressed and crushed that I do not feel 
equal to this truly arduous undertaking.” 

“Oh, Aunt Emily, I cannot bear to think of your 
doing this! What would Uncle Wilber say if he 
knew it?” 

“My one glad thought is that he does not know 
about my troubles. It was his intention to have 
left you and me at least a competence; but it is 


In Prime. 


^8 

almost impossible for a minister to save anything 
from his salary. Your uncle always had good 
appointments and was generously supported by the 
churches he served, but the demands on him were 
very great. His people expected him to live in a 
style that would not form too great a contrast with 
their own. Our living expenses were increased at 
least a third by our numerous guests, and by dele- 
gates to the conventions and conferences which 
were frequently held in his church. 

“Then, too, the poor and needy always knew the 
way to our home, and Wilber could never harden 
his heart towards them. I am very glad this was 
so, for I could not enjoy comforts procured at the 
cost of withholding our sympathies from the 
miseries and necessities of others. You can see 
how it came about that at the time of his death, he 
had made none of the provisions he had intended.” 

“And you expect nothing from the insurance 
company. ’ ’ 

“No. While he was very ill, hovering between 
life and death, having been unconscious for days, 
his policy expired, and the company refused to pay 
the insurance. It would not have been enough to 
support us, but it would have carried us over these 
first terrible months. ’ ’ 

“Dear Aunt Emily, forgive me if it is wrong to 
ask, but did not your father leave you some of his 
money?” 

“No, Kate, it is not wrong for you to ask, but 
the subject is so painful that I never speak of it if I 
can help it. At the time of my father’s marriage 
he had saved twenty thousand dollars, and owned 


In Prime. 


79 


a large, comfortable house, which my mother 
furnished with her own means. Seven years after 
my mother’s death, when I informed my father and 
brother Sidney of my intended marriage with a 
minister, they were displeased, but I think my 
father did not intend to disinherit me. Indeed, he 
used to write me that when Sidney was twenty-one 
years old he intended to divide his property equally 
between us, and then come and live with me. My 
husband and I wrote him that it made no difference 
about his giving us the money while he lived, but 
that we would be glad to have him make his home 
v\dth us. ’ ' 

“But he never came?’ 

“No, he was getting old, and when he died ten 
3^ears after I was married, it was found that all the 
property had been in Sidney’s hands for two or three 
years.’’ 

“And your brother did not offer to divide with 
you?” 

“No, he never offered to settle with us, and your 
uncle would not ask him for anything. But the 
poor man did not have much enjoyment from it, 
for he soon spent it all. Five years later, during 
his last illness, my husband went to him, took care 
of him and paid his doctor’s bill and funeral 
expenses. Before dying my brother confessed his 
wrong and seemed very sorry about it.’’ 

“Aunt Emily, there are some things I do not 
understand. Does not the church provide for the 
widows of ministers?’’ 

“Another painful subject, my dear. The church 
is supposed to do so, but for some reason, our people 


8o 


In Prime. 


do not contribute generously nor willingly for this 
purpose. Furthermore, so much has been said 
about ministers not laying up money to provide for 
themselves in old age, or for their families in case 
of their death, that bread bought with money so 
grudgingly given by people who talk in that way, 
would be very bitter food for me. Besides, I have 
heard your uncle tell so much of the distressing 
discussions at conference about such claimants; 
such inquiries about personal affairs, and some- 
times such sharp criticisms, even about the 
deceased minister, or about the use his widow 
made of the money contributed, that I would 
rather take my place with the regular army of 
homeless, penniless widows who are struggling for 
a subsistence, than to have my husband and 
myself thus discussed.” 

“Oh, yes, I remember once, when Uncle Wilber 
came home, he told us he had given Mrs. Gifford, 
the widow of a recently deceased minister, three 
hundred dollars. The conference had objected to 
doing much for her because she had a wealthy 
brother, who, they thought, ought to support her. 
It seemed the brother was unwilling to do so, and 
Uncle Wilber had been greatly shocked over the 
discussion of Mrs. Gifford’s family embarrassments. ” 

“That was only one case out of many, and for all 
these reasons I have not applied to the church for 
help in my emergency.” 

“Well, I am glad that at least I am able to 
provide for myself, and so relieve you of that much 
anxiety.” 

“Yes, indeed, and although it breaks my heart to 


In Primo. 


8i 


part with yon, my darling*, for you are like my 
own child, yet I am glad it is no worse. I loved 
you as my own when my husband returned from the 
funeral of your mother, who was his only sister, and 
brought you with him. As he placed you in my arms, 
I clasped you to my heart, thanking God for you, and 
promising to do by you as if you were indeed mine. ’ ’ 

“You never saw my mother?’* 

“No, when we were married she was living in the 
far west. We were planning to visit her the fol- 
lowing summer, when your uncle received a 
message telling of your father’s death, and asking 
him to come to her at once. He found her in a 
dying condition, and with her last breath she com- 
mitted you to his care. And what a blessing you 
have been to us! But it is tea time.” 

When they were seated at the table, Mrs. 
Rodgers said: 

‘ ‘ I have been talking to you in a very doleful way, 
but you are a woman now and ought to know about 
these things. ’ ’ 

“Oh, yes, I want you to tell me all.’’ 

“I do hope your new home will be pleasant. I 
do not dread hard work for you, but would like you 
to have congenial surroundings. You are a blossom 
that expands and gives out its fragrance in the 
sunshine of kindness; but you will soon droop if 
indifference overshadows you.’’ 

“Well, I like the work I am to do. Secretary and 
companion to an elderly lady,’ — that sounds well! 
She explains that I am to attend to her correspond- 
ence, read to her, and entertain her. I like old 
ladies and think I shall have a pleasant time.” 


82 


In Primo. 


“I hope so, but my troubles have made me 
apprehensive. You must write me soon and tell 
me exactly how things are. Some way I cannot 
shake ofif the impression that Mrs. Payson is an 
irritable, exacting and inconsiderate person, who 
will make great demands upon your time and 
patience. ” 

“Oh, my impressions are just the reverse; she 
will make much of me and I shall have a delightful 
time. ” 

“I am sure I hope so.“ 

As they rose from the table the postman brought 
a letter addressed to Mrs. Rodgers. After glancing 
at it she exclaimed : 

“Oh, this is from Mrs. Howard, one of my friends 
to whom I wrote concerning a situation.” 

“I am so glad,” cried Kate, “that it has come 
to-day. Let us go into the sitting-room immediately! 
I cannot wait to know what it says.” 

“You shall not wait. I will read it to you at 
once. ’ * 


Seaside , July — , i8 — . 

My dear Emily: — I am sure you know that it is 
not because of indifference that I have so long 
delayed answering the letter of inquiry with which 
you honored me. I have been waiting to hear from 
different people to whom I have written concerning 
the matter. Most of my friends, like myself, have 
fled from the heat of the city, and are scattered up 
and down the coast or among the mountains. For 
that reason I had to send my letters to their city 
homes to be forwarded. 


In Primo. 


83 


This morning I received a letter from Miss 
Berkely, a former pupil of mine, asking if I knew of 
a lady whom I could recommend, who would 
engage herself as companion and chaperon to Miss 
Julia Seymour, a bright, promising girl, twenty-one 
3"ears old, who has recently inherited a large 
fortune. She is quite alone in the world and has 
suddenly found herself in a very responsible place. 
Miss. Berkely writes as follows: 

“She needs an older person with her as friend, 
adviser and protector. In order to command 
Julia’s respect, she must be well educated, cultured 
and accomplished, and possessed of good natural 
mental ability; in order to be able to advise her, 
she must be a person of experience and judgment. 
I can think of no one so likely as yourself to know 
of some one who will meet these difficult and exact- 
ing conditions. 

‘ ‘ I am at liberty to authorize you to engage such a 
person as described on such terms as you think 
right. ’ ’ 

You may be sure I lost no time in telegraphing 
Miss Berkely, “I have found one who meets your 
requirements. “ 

In addition to what Miss Berkely has written, I 
will say that when I visited her last winter I met 
Miss Se3^mour, and think you will find her a con- 
genial friend. I feel sure you will have a pleasant 
home with her, as well as an opportunity to do good 
to one who needs your love and care. 

Please write me, fully and freely, what you think 
of this proposition, and if you decide to accept it, let 
me know your wishes concerning terms and arrange- 


84 


In Prime. 


ments. Please let me know if I can be helpful to 
you in any other way. I remain 

Your affectionate friend, 

CORDELIA HOWARD. 

“Oh, Aunt Emily, how delightful! Who is Mrs. 
Howard? I see she has found in you the right 
woman for the right place. My intense anxiety 
about that being relieved, I want to know some- 
thing about this friend of yours who is authorized 
to engage you on her own terms. I see she leaves 
that for you to settle, so I am favorably impressed. 
What sort of a person is she?” 

“We were school friends — were in the same 

classes and occupied the same room in C 

seminary. “ 

“Where washer home when she was at school? 
Did you know her family?” 

“Mr. Loyd, Cordelia’s father, was a literary man, 
and during his life secured a sufficient income to 
enable them to live in a comfortable and genteel 
way. Cordelia, a girl of great general ability, 
received a thorough education. Soon after she left 
the seminary her father died, and her mother, who, 
for some time had been in poor health, did not long 
survive him. 

“Cordelia was now twenty-three years old. Not 
willing to become dependent on her mother's 
wealthy relatives, who cordially offered her a home 
and support, and unwilling to encroach upon the 
small means left her, the interest of which was 
insufficient to support her, Cordelia obtained the 
position of governess in the home of Miss Berkely’s 


In Prime. 


85 


father. She remained with this family ^five years, 
when she married Mr. Walter Howard, a rich 
banker in Boston. 

“Her relation to prominent families in New York, 
her beauty, strength of character, and her husband’s 
wealth and social standing have given Mrs. Howard 
a position of influence in the highest circles of New 
York and Boston society.” 

“This is all very interesting. Sad as it will be to 
leave you, the thought that you are settled in so 
desirable a home, after I have left you, will brighten 
my journey. You will write and tell me all about 
Miss Seymour, and the place and everything?” 

“Yes, my dear, it will be a great pleasure to feel 
there is one in this wide world who wants to know 
all about me. Writing to you and telling you all, 
will be a joyful privilege. Of course I shall expect 
to know all the little and great things that enter 
into your life.” 

“Oh, I’ll send you more letters than it will be 
easy to answer.” 

“It is getting late, and you must have a good 
night’s rest to prepare you for your journey, so 
good night.” 

Kate bent over and kissed her affectionately, 
saying: 

“Good night, dear Aunt Emily. Peaceful 
dreams!” 

The next morning Kate started for her new home. 
A few days later Mrs. Rodgers joined Julia in New 
York. 


CHAPTER VII. 


July—, i8— 

Esther’s letter set me to thinking 
that perhaps the people in the class-meeting here 
may say something that will help me. I am not 
like Esther. I have not the least feeling that I am 
saved. Her letter shows clearly enough that she is 
certainly a Christian. Of course I see that if I could 
believe and trust as she does, I, too, would be in a 
saved state. I do not know what, but something 
has prevented my exercising this faith. Esther has 
trusted in this way ever since she can remember. 
So, while her letter helps me a great deal, it does 
not make clear to me just how I must begin. 

With these things in mind, while on the way to 
church, I asked Mrs. Tate if there was a class- 
meeting in connection with the morning services. 

“Yes,” she replied, “it meets immediately after 
the morning service.” 

“Would you like to attend the class-meeting?” 

“Very much. ” 

“I think I would, too.” 

The minister preached from the text, “So he 
drove out the man ; and he placed at the east of the 
Garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword, 
which turned every way, to keep the way of the 
tree of life.” — (Gen. III., 24.) I enjoyed the 
sermon, for it helped me to understand the 
difference between Esther and me, and the cause of 
86 


In Prime. 


87 


it. We were both born with inherited sin; until 
we were old enough to know good from evil, having 
never committed willful sin, having never rejected 
Christ, through the merits of the atonement we 
were then heirs of heaven. Thus infants are in the 
position of Christians; therefore, many churches 
believe them entitled to baptism. Thus far Esther’s 
case and mine are the same. When we reached the 
age of accountability, Esther yielded her will to 
God, accepted Christ as her Savior, and has 
trusted Him ever since. She has never willfully 
rejected Christ, therefore she cannot remember a 
time when she did not feel that she was a child of 
God. 

In some way it has come about, that while I have 
never knowingly rejected Christ, yet sometime I 
must have done so, for I know that pleasing God 
has not been the uppermost thought and desire of 
my heart. Of course, my mother taught me to 
pray, but I do not remember that she ever talked 
much to me about trying to please God. Perhaps 
she was like Esther and felt the subject was too 
sacred for her to speak of. Here, in my mind, 
arises the query : would it not have been better for 
Esther and my mother to have followed the ex- 
ample of the Methodists, and to have talked more 
freely of their Christian experiences, as did Esther’s 
mother? My mother taught me that it was wrong and 
dishonorable to tell an untruth. She said we should 
perform our duties with perfect faithfulness, 
whether others know and appreciate it or not ; that 
we disgraced and injured ourselves if we failed to 
do this. She used to read prayers, and although 


88 


In Priino. 


they contained petitions for God’s help in the per- 
formance of our duties and in our daily life, I under- 
stood them only in a general way, and did not 
comprehend that we might always have especial 
personal help. 

My Sunday-school teachers have always taught 
me that Jesus died to save us; but for some reason 
there has been no personal application that made 
any impression upon my mind. 

It is true I have always had an unsatisfied feeling 
about myself; but God has seemed so far off, and 
my ideas have been so vague, that I was helpless to 
better myself. 

Now, according to the sermon to-day, what I need 
is to be converted. The something that prevents 
my trusting as Esther does, is lack of repentance 
and consecration. But here again I was in per- 
plexity. Of what was I to repent? I am truly 
sorry that my heart is not good, that I have not 
lived to please God, that I have not more perfectly 
performed my duties ; yet I do not know of much 
that I have done that is good or bad. As to con- 
secration, I am sure that I want to devote my life 
to God’s service. But, since leaving Fledding, I 
am becoming aware that I have something of a will 
of my own ; when I think of devoting my life to the 
service of God, something in my mind or heart 
rises in opposition. I struggle to say with my 
whole heart, “I will obey God at all hazards”; 
but, after I have said it, I am not sure that I have 
determined to do so. So I went into the class- 
meeting with a great longing for help. 

The class-meeting began very much as the one 


In Primo. 


89 


Esther described. For some reason the speaking 
did not affect me as it did her. Perhaps my 
unsatisfied heart was so eager for help that I did not 
notice so much how things were said as what they 
meant. 

The first to speak was an old man who said that 
his probation was nearly over, and that he expected 
soon to receive the promised reward. He seemed 
very glad about it, but I did not know what he 
expected to be rewarded for. 

Then a middle-aged man spoke quite vehemently 
of his intention to continue in the Christian course, 
and assured the older man that he was following 
on, and that after a few more years he would join 
him in the home beyond. After this a verse was 
sung with great spirit. I felt the enthusiasm of the 
speaker, but it did not show me any way out of my 
trouble. 

A dejected looking man rose and said that for 
many years he had been trying to make his way to 
Heaven, and asked the brothers and sisters to pray 
for him. I thought, “That man is just like me; he 
is trying, but has not found what he wants. ’ ’ 

Another spoke of temptations, trials, failures and 
discouragements. It did not seem that he had been 
successful in his efforts to be a Christian. He was 
told to trust God and all would be well. I already 
understood that, so I had learned nothing yet. 
What I wanted to know was how to make a 
beginning. 

The next was a man who confessed he had not 
been as faithful as he ought; had neglected secret 
prayer, and the study of God’s Word; consequently 


90 


In Prime. 


his hope had been dimmed and his joy lessened. 
He said he was very sorry, and promised God and 
the brethren that he would do better. “There,’* 
said I to myself, “that helps me a little; I can read 
the Bible more and pray more.” 

Several spoke in so low a voice I could not hear 
them. A number simply said they loved God and 
trusted Him to save them. At the last a plainly 
dressed woman who sat in a seat with a number of 
little children, rose, and, speaking in clear but 
reverent tone, told of the joy she found in Christian 
service; .she said she had no opportunity to do great 
things, but had consecrated her life to God’s 
service, and trusted Him for grace to do just such 
things as He gave her ; that she washed dishes and 
tied on little shoes to the glory of God, for she had 
learned that whether we eat or drink, or whatso- 
ever we do, to do it all to the glory of God. In 
thus trusting and serving her joy had become 
wonderful ; she dwelt in the presence of her Savior 
continually, and her peace was like a river, ever 
broadening and deepening. 

I wanted to come right home and write these 
thoughts in my journal, while they were fresh in 
my mind. From one I had gained the idea that 
repentance is the sorrow for sin which leads us to 
cease doing wrong and become willing to do right; 
from that good woman I learned that consecration 
means just belonging to God, and being ready to do 
everything, however insignificant or great, in such 
a way that God will be honored in our act. 

What though some of the speeches this morning 
were meaningless! What though some of the 


In Primo. 


91 


people seemed to have little heart in what they 
said! Were not these two testimonies worth all the 
world to me? I am beginning to find a place on 
which to stand ; I can be ready for such service as 
God gives me to perform; I can study my Bible, 
pray, and trust Him to lead me into the right way, 
and so I can go on until my life and experience are 
like that woman’s. 

July—, 18—.— 

My days are becoming very full. 
If this continues, and it probably will, I shall 
have as busy a life as I ever had at Fledding. I 
have arranged for myself a sort of programme 
according to which my early morning hours are 
spent in Bible study, reading the prayer-book and 
praying for help to lead a life pleasing to God. After 
breakfast I practice my music and look over the 
new magazines and papers, of which I now have a 
large supply. In the afternoon I drive out, usually 
visiting one or two farmers. On my return I write 
letters and study. 

Thinking I would better read the New Testament 
through again, I studied this morning the first chap- 
ter of St. Matthew’s gospel. I was much impressed 
by a part of the twenty-first verse, “And thou shalt 
call his name J esus, for he shall save his people from 
their sins.” I have read this chapter many times, 
but never particularly noticed this verse. I have 
always thought of Jesus dying to save us from pun- 
ishment for our sins, but this verse says, “He shall 
save his people from their Sins. ’ ’ That will meet 
my needs, for while I have a desire to be forgiven for 
my sins, I have always been troubled over the tend- 


92 


In Primo. 


ency of humanity to continue in their sins. Since 
the question has been raised about our being saved 
in this life, and knowing that we are saved, and that 
there is nothing in death to change our sinful natures, 
it naturally follows that, although our past sins are 
forgiven, if we enter Heaven with an unchanged 
nature, we must retain this nature there and con- 
tinue in sin. But if Jesus is to save us from our 
sins, — I do not altogether understand this verse, but 
it seems to mean more than I had supposed, — if 
Jesus can save us from our sins so we can enter 
Heaven as sinless creatures, can He not thus save 
us while yet on earth? I knelt in my room and 
prayed that I might understand more fully what I 
read in the Holy Bible. 

July—, i8— 

To-day the Rev. Mr. Brooks, the 
Methodist minister, came to see Mrs. Tate, and also 
called on me. He talked very pleasantly about the 
country, and seemed glad to learn that I was going 
to spend some time in the place. He then said: 

“You are a member of the Episcopal Church?” 

“Yes,” I replied, “my mother and grandparents 
belonged to that Church, as well as Mrs. Bradford 
of Fledding Seminary. I never attended any other 
service until I came here. ’ ’ 

“Indeed! Well, we are glad to have you come, 
and wish you could influence more of the people 
living on your land to attend church.” 

‘ ‘ I had not thought about it, but I will try to do so. ’ ’ 

“Have you ever attended a camp-meeting?” 

“No, Mr. Brooks.” 

“Our district camp-meeting begins the twelfth of 


In Primo. 


93 


August. It is held at W , about fifteen miles 

from here. Would you not like to arrange to go?” 

“I do not know. Please tell me about this camp- 
meeting. What do you do when there? What 
arrangements do you make to go?” 

“We hold religious services; there are three or 
four sermons a day, besides several prayer-meet- 
ings. Christian people meet and talk of their 
Christian experiences, and try to urge non-Chris- 
tians to change their course and become servants of 
the Lord. 

“As to the arrangements, we rent a cottage or 
tent, and bring with us such things as are necessary 
to make us comfortable during our two weeks’ stay 
in the camp. ’ ’ 

“Really, I am quite interested. Could I rent a 
cottage or tent? I would need rather a large one, 
for Mrs. Tate would be glad to go, and I should 
take my maid. Mrs. Rodgers will be here soon and 
I should want her to go. Besides, we would need 
some one to cook and take care of the tent. Then 
there would be the horses and carriage, — some one 
must go to take care of them. ’ ’ 

“I was going to invite you to be our guest and 
occupy a room in our cottage, but your plan of 
taking a number of people is much better. Why 
not build a cottage, and then it will always be there 
for yourself and your people who may attend from 
year to year?” 

“I believe I should like that better.” 

“If you so wish, I will send a carpenter out to see 
you about it. Mr. Brown is a member of our church 
and will know just what will be needed.” 


94 


In Prinio. 


“Oh, thank you! That will be quite delightful, 
— building a new house and living in this way for a 
week or two.” 

“I think you will enjoy it. You will meet a 
great many of our best Christian young people.” 

“Indeed, I think I must go.” 

“As you are attending our services for the 
present, perhaps you would like to take some of our 
church papers?” 

“Yes, I think I would. I never have had time to 
read much, and am trying to make up for what I 
have lost in the past. ” 

So I subscribed for a number of missionary and 
other church papers. After this I told Rev. Mr. 
Brooks about the papers and magazines I am 
reading, and asked him if there were any that 
would tell me about farming, mills, and factories. 
He gave me the names of several publications for 
which I shall send. 

When he went away he said Mrs. Brooks would 
call in a few days. I have been told that this lady 
is a college graduate and a very superior woman, 
but believing that here she can accomplish the most 
good, she is content to live in this little village, 
among people greatly inferior to her intellectually, 
and is happy in her work. I like Rev. Mr. Brooks 
very much. After we are better acquainted I 
shall talk to him about this matter of being saved, 
and many other questions connected with it. 

July— i8— 

This morning Mr. Day, the grain 
merchant at the village, called. He introduced him- 
self, saying he was one of the church stewards, 


In Primo. 


95 


whose duty it is to visit the members of the 
church and congregation to receive their con- 
tributions towards the support of the church. As 
there is no church of any other denomination here, 
they give the opportunity to all who live in the 
vicinity to contribute if they so desire. I asked : 

“How much do you wish me to give?” 

“That is for you to decide. This year, repairs 
on church and parsonage, general running expenses, 
pastor’s salary and benevolent collections make it 
necessary to raise about fifteen hundred dollars, or 
three hundred and seventy- five dollars per quarter. 
We are back one hundred dollars on last quarter, so 
we now need nearly five hundred dollars.” 

“If I pay the one hundred dollars that is back, 
can the people raise the remaining four hundred 
dollars?” 

“Why, I hope so, — but as you are a member of 
another church we did not expect so much.” 

“I attend church here and have the benefit of the 
services, so I ought to bear my share of the 
expenses. It occurs to me that the deficit is a bad 
thing, and if I could relieve you of that it would not 
be so difficult to raise the remainder.” 

“Thank you very much indeed.” 

“If it is not an improper question, may I ask the 
amount of the pastor’s salary?” 

“That is a question of public interest and you are 
entitled to know. His salary is one thousand dollars 
a year. ’ ’ 

“If during the year you need more money than 
you can raise, please let me know. I shall always 
be glad to help.” 


96 


In Primo. 


“Thank you. You have been in class-meeting 
several times, but I have not seen you at our Sun- 
day-school. We would be pleased to have you 
come. Will you not teach a class?” 

“Oh, indeed, I am not capable of doing that. I 
am but a learner myself. “ 

“Well, then come and join one of the Bible- 
classes. Professor Benton, principal of the school, 
is an excellent Bible-class teacher.” 

“Thank you, perhaps I shall.” 

This is all that has occurred to-day that is unusual. 
After luncheon we start for New York. 

July — i8— 

Last evening, Mrs. Tate, Parsons 
and I reached Yew York. We had a very pleasant 
journey in a magnificent parlor car, which was 
quite a contrast to the coaches in which I came 
from Fledding to Sunset Park. 

At the station a beautiful carriage was in readi- 
ness, and every arrangement for our comfort had 
been carefully made. At the hotel Mrs. Rodgers 
was awaiting me. She is such a lovely lady. Some 
way, I had not been able to get it out of my mind 
that she would be like Mrs. Bradford. I am most 
agreeably disappointed, but will write more about 
her later. 

I have spent to-day in going over my spacious 
and elegantly-furnished city residence. It is so 
large and the details are so many, that as yet I have 
but a confused impression of velvet carpets, hand- 
some chairs and sofas, draperies and lace, and 
stained glass, through which the varied colored 
lights fall with fine effect upon floor, statuary, 


In Primo. 


97 


cabinets, and marble and inlaid tables. When I 
close my eyes visions of a wilderness of pictures 
and other works of art pass before me. I could 
arrive at no conclusion nor form any plans to-day. 
Mrs. Rodgers seemed quite at home among these 
wonderful things, and was able to explain what to 
me, in my ignorance, was new and strange. 

The beauty of the building and its contents thrill 
me with a new sort of pleasure that I cannot describe. 
Some way, too, it overwhelms and oppresses me 
to think of establishing myself here at present; 
Sunset Park will be a restful place after this 
labyrinth of splendor. I would like to see those 
grand saloons, drawing-rooms and halls lighted up 
with those wonderful chandeliers! Certainly it 
would look like fairyland. Through all this 
confusion of thought there steals across my mind, 
like a sad refrain, the memory that this beautiful 
home has been a delight to others now silent in 
death, — its massive doors are forever closed to 
them, — they can come home no more; and I, the 
stranger, lonely, and forsaken by kindred, have 
passed in and taken possession. Oh, truly, truly I 
must be careful how I use all that has been so 
unexpectedly placed in my hands. 

Our apartments at the hotel are also very grand. 
Arrangements have been made for us to take our 
meals in our private parlor, which we did last 
evening and this morning. This evening I asked 
Mrs. Rodgers to go with me to the public dining- 
room. Having seen so little of the world and its 
people, I want an opportunity to learn all I can 
about them. 


98 


In Primo. 


It was eight o’clock when we entered the dining- 
room. Near the small table at which we sat was 
a larger one where quite a company of people in 
evening dress were dining. The flash of diamonds 
and other jewels displayed to advantage the loveli- 
ness of these beautifully dressed women. Their 
manners were easy and polished, and they all 
seemed gay and happy. 

I suppose this is the sort of society Mr. Markham 
thought I would be eager to enter. Since seeing 
this party I am uncertain about my feelings in the 
matter. At present, in company with such people, 
I am sure I should feel very strange and ill at ease. 
Diffidence would prevent my laughing and talking as 
they do, and a silent, timid person would be out of 
place in such a party. On the other hand, I would 
like to know what they are talking about that 
pleases them so much. I wonder how it would 
seem to have on one of those beautiful dresses, and 
how I would look wearing such gems. I would 
like to go to a ball myself and see what it is like, — 
and to know these people and of what they are 
thinking. 

I believe the ball these people are going to attend 
is given in honor of some distinguished foreigner, 
who has just landed in New York. Although it is 
such an unusual season, many have come from differ- 
ent summer resorts to attend it. 

July — , i8— 

I have again gone over that 
marvel of a house, and have a somewhat clearer 
idea of the general arrangement of the establish- 
ment. The house itself is a triumph of art. I had 


In Primo. 


99 


a look at the library of which Mr. Markham has 
spoken. To his surprise and almost consternation, 
the first and only order I have given was to have 
the law books packed and sent to Sunset Park. He 
seemed to think it almost sacrilege to remove them 
from this place ; but I need them, so they are to be 
sent. 

There is very little of interest going on in the 
city; but New York itself would hold my attention 
for a long time. I have done some shopping and 
these huge business houses amaze me not a little. I 
have selected new furniture for the library at 
Sunset, carpet and upholstering of a cool, restful, 
dark green. 


CHAPTER VIII. 


July—, i8— 

This morning we attended Church 
services and enjoyed them very much. There was 
not a large congregation, but the clergyman was 
earnest and his sermon good. He spoke of character 
building, saying that it means more than what we 
do or say, for all we see, think, hear, read, — and 
even the influences we receive from association with 
others, enter into and become a part of its struc- 
ture. 

To me this is a very serious matter, for, as the 
clergyman reasoned it out, our characters are our 
very selves, that which we shall take with us from 
this world and have hereafter. How very important 
then that I make sure of obtaining divine help and 
direction! I would like to build up a noble, well 
rounded, complete character, but I do not know 
what elements to grasp, or what work to undertake 
to aid me in this development. I would like to 
spend my life accomplishing good, but there is no 
opportunity. I would like to show love and kind- 
ness, but there is no one to receive from me. I 
would be so glad to bring Esther into my home, and 
throughout her life-time relieve her of the necessity 
of care and toil; to bring her lovely mother with her, 
and send her noble brothers to college, and then 
furnish the means to establish each in his chosen 
profession. It would be such a pleasure to send her 


100 


In Primo. 


lOI 


sisters to school, and after their education is 
finished, settle the whole family in such a home as 
would suit them, providing them with all the com- 
forts and happiness in my power to give. 

The preacher also spoke of transacting business 
in a way that will allow the free exercise of the 
highest motives. I do not yet understand what 
opportunities for noble acts business transactions 
may afford; but I can be careful what I say and 
think, and thus make a beginning in character 
building, as a stepping stone towards good deeds. 
I can work hard to understand my business concerns 
and watch for opportunities. I can study, and pray 
for a good heart, so that if ever the possibility to 
do good does come, I may be prepared ; I can guard 
against selfishness, and unholy ambition, which the 
clergyman says is but another form of selfishness. 
Like the saintly woman who says such helpful 
things in class-meeting, I can endeavor “whether 
I eat or drink, or whatsoever I do, to do it all 
to the glory of God.’’ Perhaps, if I am careful 
in little things, God will help me to do greater 
things. 

When Mrs. Tate lived in Scotland she belonged 
to the Presbyterian Church. This evening she said 
she would like to attend a Presbyterian service, so 
we all went with her. 

The minister preached from the text, “For where 
your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” 
— (St. Luke xii. 34.) He proved from Scripture 
that the obligation to give one tenth of our increase 
is not a part of the old ceremonial law — as some 
suppose— but of the moral law. After making clear 


102 


In Prime. 


that this is one of God’s requirements, he pro- 
ceeded to show the necessity for such a law, and 
explained that the church is of divine origin, and 
that its demands cannot be set aside without incur- 
ring divine displeasure. Among its claims are the 
erection of church edifices, the support of the 
ministry, the missionary interests, both home and 
foreign, and the maintenance of educational 
institutions. 

He also mentioned the thousands of poor people 
whose sufferings give them a claim upon our sym- 
pathies; the sick people, of whom we should be 
mindful ; the homeless orphans, for whom we ought 
to provide; and the friendless, whose comfort we 
should consider. 

I am very glad to have heard this sermon, for it 
opens up an avenue of service that I shall enter with 
delight. Although I cannot personally perform 
great acts, I can at least consecrate my wealth to 
the service of Christ. The tenth of my income will 
be a large sum, but from what I have heard to-day 
there are enough worthy causes upon which it can 
be expended. 

I notice that while the different churches all have 
one purpose, viz., to lead people to serve Christ, 
each seems to emphasize some particular duty. 
One exalts that of showing due reverence to 
Almighty God; another lays especial stress upon 
personal religious experience; and a third dwells 
much upon the duty of Christian giving. I suppose 
that each has also its shortcomings, as Esther, in 
one case, has pointed out. As yet, I am undecided 
which is best adapted to my needs. 


In Prime. 


103 


July — , 18—.— 

Sunday evening the minister 
announced that on Monday evening, in the lecture 
room of the church, there would be a special meet- 
ing of the Woman’s Missionary Society. Being 
desirous of learning about all these interests, I 
asked Mrs. Rodgers if she thought it would be 
improper for us to go. She thought not, if we 
showed our interest by contributing to the treasury. 
Mrs. Tate was delighted to go with us. We reached 
the church a few minutes before the meeting opened, 
and at once a lady came forward to greet us. Mrs. 
Rodgers explained in her easy, beautiful way, that 
we were strangers in the city, and, having heard 
the announcement on Sunday, we were interested 
and came. Her cordial reception made us feel very 
welcome. 

After the meeting was called to order, the presi- 
dent stated that the society had undertaken to build 
a hospital for women and children in one of their 
foreign fields. She explained the great need of 
such an institution, and dwelt upon the blessedness 
of the privilege of contributing toward such an 
object. How much trouble and suffering there are 
in the world, of which I know nothing. The presi- 
dent said that five thousand dollars was needed by 
fall, and of this amount the churches in New York 
City were expected to raise two thousand dollars ; 
since this was one of the small churches, they were 
asked to raise but one hundred dollars. As many 
members of the larger churches were absent from 
the city, they could take no action until their 
return. Few of their own members being away, 


104 


In Primo. 


there was no reason why they should not begin at 
once. After a lengthy discussion, they decided upon 
the various things which they could do to raise the 
one hundred dollars, and the meeting closed. 

I then approached the president, telling her I 
would contribute something, drew my check book 
from my pocket, and made out a check for one 
thousand dollars. She looked much surprised, 
asked where I was staying, and then thanked me. 
This afternoon a committee appointed by their 
society was sent to thank me for my gift of yester- 
day. I told them I was glad to see them, but that it 
was unnecessary for them to have taken so much 
trouble, for it was as great a pleasure for me to give 
the money as it was to them to receive it. They 
said their president was much disturbed because 
she had made so little response yesterday. It was 
such an unusual thing for any one, much less a 
stranger, to come in and quietly give them a 
thousand dollars that it seemed too good to be true. 
The president, not knowing me, did not feel sure 
the check would be honored at the bank, hence her 
reserve. 

They then told me they felt more than ever obli- 
gated to raise their one hundred dollars as a thank 
offering for the one thousand dollars. 

After they went away I fell to thinking over what 
had occurred. I am surprised that it is such an 
unusual thing for rich people to contribute largely 
for so worthy a cause. Why is it? One would 
think it almost discreditable to the wealthier classes, 
that these earnest Christian women could hardly 
believe that one who had just learned of such needs 


In Prime. 


105 

should wish to give this sum towards helping to 
alleviate them. 

Mrs. Rodgers, who did not know the amount I 
had given until the ladies called, remarked this 
evening that it would be well for me to study care- 
fully the different causes worthy of consideration, 
and thus be able to apportion my contributions 
according to the importance of the claims. I told 
her that as yet I had had no time to inform myself 
on these lines, and that the Sunday sermon on 
Christian giving had impressed me so deeply, I felt 
that this first opportunity to act upon my new con- 
victions must be met with something unusual. She 
replied that if this was the case, there was no room 
for criticism of my unusual act. 

From what Mrs. Rodgers and the ladies said, I 
judge that when people give large sums of money 
they usually do it in a very public manner, — at some 
large and important convention. I wonder why? 
Surely I deserve no more praise for giving one 
thousand dollars to a good cause than many a poor 
woman, who, at a really greater sacrifice than mine, 
gives one dollar. Yet no one thinks much of that! 
Things seem to grow more mysterious and per- 
plexing. 

July— 18—.— 

Yesterday we returned home to 
dear old Sunset Park. ‘ ‘ Home” is a beautiful word ; 
having been without a home such a great part of 
my life, it seems as if I cannot say it often enough. 
I have read that the author of the touching song, 
“Home, Sweet Home,” was himself a homeless 
wanderer. I think only such an one could have 


io6 


In Primo. 


written the song ; only such an one could ever know 
the deepest longings for home. 

While in New York I saw much, heard much, 
and thought much. Life looks like very serious 
business; as fast as one problem is solved, new ones 
present themselves. By the way, Mrs. Rodgers 
says that many people make large gifts in public 
places, hoping thereby to incite others to do like- 
wise. Strange that this should be necessary. 
When people give money because some one else 
does, is it real generosity? But Mrs. Rodgers says 
that while some may not give from the highest 
motives, others give at such times, who have never 
before seen it in the light of privilege. 

July—, i8— 

Mrs. Rodgers is going to be a 
great help to me ; she is a true, earnest Christian, 
with whom I can talk very freely. She has told me 
much about herself and her niece Kate, of whom 
she likes to talk. ***** 4 : 

Mrs. Rodgers is a rather small, but well formed 
woman, about forty years old, with blue eyes and 
dark brown hair. The soft curves of her delicate, 
mobile features make one instantly feel that she 
could never say nor do a harsh thing. When she 
speaks, her soft, well modulated tones at once 
assure you that you are in the presence of a cul- 
tured, refined woman. She is so unobtrusive that I 
never feel her presence in the least unpleasant ; she 
is so thoroughly well bred, with quick, almost 
intuitive sympathies, together with so much tact, 
that I do not experience the least degree of uncom- 
fortable restraint in her presence as companion 


In Prime. 


107 


and chaperon; on the contrary, I find great relief 
and comfort in having such a friend to talk with, 
about all the things in which I am interested ; and 
her opinions impress me as being very correct. She 
says there is no way of understanding many of the 
things I inquire about without thinking them out 
for myself. Other things she takes great pains to 
explain. 

July— 18—.— 

I have just written a long letter to 
Esther, which I will now copy into my journal. 

Sunset Park, July — , 18 — . 

My dear Esther: — Yesterday I received your kind 
letter giving me permission to show Mrs. Rodgers 
yours about Christian experience. In my previous 
letter I have already told you how helpful it has 
been to me, and now I come to you with more of my 
perplexities. Many of these you will discover 
from my journal, but there are still others that 
trouble me. 

First, however, I want to say that you need not 
apprehend any misunderstanding of the spirit of 
your letter on the part of Mrs. Rodgers. She says 
that true Methodists will not shrink from just and 
conscientious criticisms of their faults. Mrs. 
Rodgers thinks that since others, as well as your- 
self, see these things, nothing is gained by attempt- 
ing to excuse or cover them ; a better way would be 
to acknowledge them and set about seeking a 
remedy, thus avoiding the contempt that would 
otherwise be deserved. 

In many of your criticisms Mrs. Rodgers quite 


io8 


In Primo. 


agrees with you. For one thing, she thinks that 
many Methodists so emphasize the importance and 
value of Christian testimony, that they come to look 
upon the act of testifying as the evidence of their 
Christianity, very much as I considered myself a 
Christian because I had been baptized. Conse- 
quently, in the Methodist, as well as in the Epis- 
copal Church, there are many who do not under- 
stand that to be a true Christian one must not only 
confess Christ, but obey His commands, and follow 
His example. This is, perhaps, the reason why the 
Church of God is disgraced by so many inconsistent 
Christians. Therefore, when these people under- 
take to talk of Christian experience, like all others 
who attempt to talk on a subject of which they are 
ignorant, their remarks are lacking in spirit, and 
become mere empty sound. Moreover, since the 
church members who are consistent in their per- 
sonal lives, so generally quietly acquiesce in the 
wrong-doing of nominal Christians, they, in a 
measure, make themselves responsible for the 
presence of such in the church. Hence, the testi- 
mony of the former is meaningless, disconnected 
and unprofitable ; while the knowledge that the sin 
of such people is allowed to pass unrebuked tends to 
make less confident the testimony of those who 
endeavor to be true. 

Mrs. Rodgers further says that no eloquence nor 
rhetoric can put life into the testimony of an incon- 
sistent Christian. On the other hand there are 
cultured, educated people, — and still others illiterate 
and uneducated, — who, because of the genuineness 
of their Christianity, give testimonies that are 


In Primo. 


109 

simple, definite and helpful to all who hear them. 
She is very positiv^e that this is the secret of the 
power of testimony ; and that the lack of it explains 
why so many such meetings are called “dry.” 

Mrs. Rodgers also deeply deplores the lack of 
reverence in many churches, besides the Methodist. 
On the other hand, she believes that a lack of 
seemly Christian cordiality has a chilling effect upon 
church attendance. While she wholly disapproves 
of everything like visiting, or talking of business 
matters before or following a service of worship, yet 
she thinks a friendly greeting, especially when 
extended to strangers, with an earnest invitation to 
“come again,” does much good. 

In returning to your letter again, I must say I never 
can thank you for it sufficiently . I think that to 
speak rarely of religion because it is such a sacred 
subject that you feel unworthy to do so, must be a 
mistake. How can it be otherwise when what you 
have written has helped me so much? Only think 
how much good you could have done me in all the 
past years, if you had talked with me of these 
things as you did of other matters pertaining to my 
interest! It seems to me like this: I love to talk 
about you because you have been so good to me. 
In the same way, since Christ has done so much for 
us, it ought to be the most natural thing in the 
world to talk about His love and goodness with those 
who know Him, or want to know Him. 

I could not speak of you in the presence of any 
one who did not respect you, and in some measure 
appreciate your worth, unless, indeed, it might be 
that I could do them a kindness by helping them to 


no 


In Primo. 


understand how noble and true a woman can be. 
So I can understand how one of your nature would 
shrink from speaking of religious subjects to those 
who do not reverence God, unless it might be 
with the hope of leading them to share in the joy of 
realizing His love ; but with those who already do 
this, I should think such intercourse would give the 
greatest satisfaction. 

My thought goes out still further. I am afraid 
that many of the girls at Fledding, like myself, 
have never realized that they may have real com- 
munion with our Savior, — that they may know 
they are children of “Our Heavenly Father.” A 
sermon such as I heard may never come in their 
way to set them thinking and inquiring. But they 
have you, and you understand all about it. If you 
do not tell them these things, I fear they may never 
hear them; and it seems to me this would be a 
terrible calamity. Esther, dear, dear Esther, won’t 
you, for the love of Christ, and for the sake of their 
precious souls, tell the girls of your own experience, 
and the joy it gives you? Since hearing and think- 
ing so much, my thoughts constantly go out to 
them ; I am so sorry they have not the opportunities 
I am having, but am so glad you are there, for you 
can, at least, give them a chance to know of their 
privileges. 

After all this, and what you will read in my 
journal, you will not be surprised when I tell you 
that I am inclined to think the Methodist Church is 
the one that can help me the most. Notwithstand- 
ing the seeming incongruities of those who talk in 
the class-meeting, there are always sure to be some 


In Prime. 


iii 


present, who are earnest, true Christians, and their 
testimony has already been so helpful to me that I 
do not want to lose the benefit I am certain it will 
be to me in the future. Moreover, the doctrine and 
teaching of this church seem to be Scriptural, and 
as such, meet my needs. You know that of late I 
have studied my Bible a great deal ; it has become 
a new and intensely interesting book. Some days 
I read it for hours, and find many injunctions to 
Christians to bear witness by word and deed to the 
salvation we have through Christ. About one 
matter I am yet uncertain; this church has very 
strict rules concerning the conduct of its members, 
especially concerning amusements. To be sure, I 
have been told that many of the members, 
especially the younger people, are not very 
particular about keeping the rules. However, if I 
join a church and promise to obey its laws, I would 
consider it dishonorable and wicked to break such a 
solemn pledge. I have not danced since I took 
lessons at Fledding before you came, but never 
even have thought of its being wrong, and cannot 
see any harm in it now. In any case, I must wait 
until I am sure I am converted before I join this 
church; and in the meantime I must find out for 
myself whether it would be right for me to make all 
the promises required to become a member. 

With your order-loving, esthetic nature and way 
of looking at things, I cannot imagine you as any- 
thing but what you are ; you almost seem a part of 
the grand but simple service of our Church, with its 
dim lights, sweet chants and glorious music; its 
reverential awe and silent worship. I am different. 


112 


In Prime. 


and do not absorb the spirit of the occasion, but 
need to be told what everything means and have it 
all minutely explained. With all their shortcomings, 
the Methodists do this, and it strikes a responsive 
chord in my soul. 

Will you forgive me for writing such a long letter, 
and wherever you see I need setting straight, 
please correct me? 

As ever, yours with love, 

JULIA SEYMOUR. 


CHAPTER IX. 


Aug. — , i8— .— 

About one o’clock to-day, quite 
unexpectedly, Mr. Yates arrived at Sunset Park. 
After luncheon he said there were some matters 
about which he wished to consult me. We went to 
the library and he explained : 

‘ ‘ Miss Seymour, I suppose you know that the late 
Mr. Clayton left a will by which he bequeathed all 
his prop'erty to his son, Frank Clayton. Frank Clay- 
ton’s mother, who died some years ago, was the 
daughter of Mr. Cyrus Cooper of Baltimore. His 
son, Mr. Henry Cooper, brother of the late Mrs. 
Clayton, called at my office last week and claimed 
that as Mr. Clayton’s will left all his property to 
Frank, he, Mr. Henry Cooper, as his nearest 
relative, is Mr. Frank’s rightful heir. I suppose 
there is no doubt that both Mr. Frank and his 
father, had they known what was going to happen, 
would have wished the property to go to the 
Cooper family. They were very much attached to 
Mrs. Cooper’s kindred.” 

“Excuse me for interrupting you for a moment, 
please. Are the Cooper people poor?” 

“No, they have plenty of money to carry this 
case through the courts should they choose to do so. 
Moreover, Mr. Cooper is himself a lawyer, with 
many friends in the legal profession; more than 
that, he is acquainted with most of the judges 


In Primo. 


before whom the case would be likely to come, 
several of them being his most intimate friends. 
He would have a great deal in his favor were the 
matter brought into court.” 

This was not what I had in mind ; I asked the 
question with the intention of providing for Mrs. 
Clayton’s brother if he were in needy circumstances. 

“But what can be done to prevent this suit?’’ 

“That is what I came to talk about. Even if Mr. 
Cooper won his case, it would cost him quite a sum 
of money before it was all settled. From several 
remarks you made when I was here before, I con- 
cluded that if you owned only Sunset Park and were 
thus free from the complications, perplexities and 
responsibilities of managing the remainder of your 
possessions, you would be happier and enjoy life 
more than in fulfilling the duties that are a part 
of a rich person’s life. 

“Therefore it occurred to me that perhaps you 
could effect a settlement with the Cooper family, 
whereby you could satisfy them and relieve yourself 
of those troublesome mills, factories, tenement 
houses, mercantile enterprises, and other business 
cares, without litigation, provided you were per- 
mitted to retain Sunset Park. ’ ’ 

“Mr. Yates, do you know whether Mrs. Clayton’s 
father gave her any money, and if so, how much? 
Also, whether she held it in her own name — or was 
it given to Mr. Clayton and so became a part of his 
property?’’ 

“As the legal adviser of both families, I have 
complete knowledge of these matters, but I hardly 
feel free to discuss them. Nevertheless, I will go 


In PrimOi 


so far as to say that Mrs. Clayton’s dowry from her 
father was considerable, and as she immediately 
turned it over to Mr. Clayton, it is included in the 
property now held by you.” 

“Why has not Mr. Henry Cooper presented his 
claim before?” 

“This I am not at liberty to explain.” 

“Have you any further information or advice to 
give me?” 

“I have told you all I have to say. As I have 
intimated, had Mr. Clayton known what the end 
would be, he would certainly have wished the 
Cooper family to have his property. I leave it to 
your judgment and conscience to decide as to what 
may be your duty as well as the wise thing to do.” 

“I know very little about law, but I have listened 
to you attentively, and will carefully consider what 
you have told me. When I have decided what I 
ought to do I will communicate with you. For the 
present I can only say that were the Cooper family 
poor and needy people, I would most willingly settle 
on them an amount sufficient to relieve them from 
any financial anxiety. As it is, if it is shown that 
any money from the Cooper fortune has come to me, 
I see no reason why it should not be returned to the 
family. 

“But when we come to speak of property which 
Mr. Clayton inherited from his ancestors, the 
matter does not seem so clear. It is true that 
because my grandmother, Margaret Clayton, 
married my grandfather, Edgar Whittington, 
against the wishes of her father, Robert Clayton, 
he disinherited her, leaving all his property to his 


In Primo. 


ii6 


only son, her brother John, the father of the late 
Mr. James Clayton. 

“Now, Mr. Robert Clayton, Grandmamma 
Whittington’s father, inherited this property from 
his father, Richard Clayton, who was, of course, 
Grandmamma Whittington’s grandfather. Grand- 
mamma Whittington said that her grandfather did 
not object to her marriage. Indeed, I have in my 
possession a letter which my dying mother placed in 
my hands with a most solemn injunction never to 
lose it, nor to speak of it, until I became a woman ; 
this letter was written to my grandmamma by her 
grandfather before her marriage, and in it he 
admonished her never to marry a man she did not 
love, and referred to unhappiness in the Clayton 
family caused by such marriages. In this same 
letter he approved of her marriage with my grand- 
father, Edgar Whittington. 

“Moreover, when, through failing health, he 
became unable to attend to business, and transferred 
his property to grandmamma’s father, Robert Clay- 
ton, who was his only child, it was with the under- 
standing that his two grandchildren, grandmamma 
and her brother John, should, on their father’s 
death, receive equal shares of the property thus 
assigned. He died before the marriage took place. 

“Knowing this to be true, and that grandmamma 
was the favorite of her grandfather — for with the 
letter mentioned, my mother also gave me my 
grandmother’s statement to this effect, which I was 
also to preserve, as it and the letter might prove 
useful to me — I am sure the Cooper family has no 
moral claim to the property descended from the 


In Prime. 


117 


grandfather of my grandmother. Of course, I do 
not know what right the law may give them, but if 
the unwritten wishes of the deceased are to be 
regarded, it seems to me consistent that the wishes 
of this grandfather should be first considered. 

“Under these circumstances, I cannot lightly 
deliver up an inheritance which would have come to 
me had the wishes of this grandfather been carried 
out. He certainly would not have desired that any 
of his property should pass from his own family to 
that of the Coopers.” 

“Do you intend undertaking to establish your 
claim to all this property?” 

“I do not know yet what I ought to do. If all 
this property rightfully belongs to the Cooper 
family, it would be wrong for me to contend for the 
possession of Sunset Park. If all rightfully belongs 
to me I ought not to shirk duty and responsibility 
by turning it over to any one who attempts to obtain 
it wrongfully. ’ ’ 

“I have already explained the ground of Mr, 
Cooper’s claim. I will also add that out of a desire 
to befriend you, because you have so few to advise 
you, I have come here to inform you of what may 
be a chance to retain for yourself a comfortable 
home. As I am also legal adviser of the Cooper 
family, I must ask you, please, not to mention what 
I have told you, as, were it to come to their knowl- 
edge, it would get me into trouble and might result 
in my losing their patronage. 

“I would be glad to bring about such a settlement 
between you and Mr. Cooper as would benefit you 
and occasion him no loss. If you agree to what I 


ii8 


In Primo. 


have proposed I will inform him of the terms on 
which you will settle with him. ’ ’ 

“Since I am entitled to all, or none, of the prop- 
erty, I shall not attempt to secure what does not 
belong to me. Therefore it will be unnecessary to 
mention your suggestions concerning Sunset Park. ’ ’ 

“As your legal adviser and attorney, what instruc- 
tions have you to give me?” 

“At present, none; I must have time to think.” 

“But, my dear young lady, you do not seem to 
realize that there is no time to lose. If you place 
your case in my hands I must leave this evening so 
as to be on hand to look after your interests. I 
assure you, I will use my best efforts to see that 
justice is done you. But this matter cannot wait.” 

“I have no instructions to give you. In any case, 
I do not see the advantage of any action, since you 
have intimated that Mr. Cooper will probably be 
sustained in any claim he may make.” 

“Will you enter no protest, make no conditions?” 

“Not to-day. ” 

“If you think you can decide upon your course 
by to-morrow I will remain until morning and tele- 
graph my partner to enter a protest on your behalf, 
which you can withdraw at any time.” 

“I cannot promise you an answer even then. 
Perhaps Mrs. Rodgers can help me to see more 
clearly. She is in the city to-day.” 

A quick light shot into Mr. Yates’ gray eyes, but 
was gone in a moment. He quickly asked: 

“Who is Mrs. Rodgers?” 

“My companion and chaperon, whom you have 
not met. ” 


Ill Prinio. 


“Where did you form her acquaintance?” 

“A friend, Mrs. Howard of Boston, recommended 
her.” 

“Mrs. Howard, wife of J. W. Howard?” 

“The same.” 

“Where did you get acquainted with Mrs. 
Howard?” 

“When she visited Miss Berkely.” 

“Who is Miss Berkely?” 

“A teacher at Fledding who has always been very 
kind to me and who takes a great interest in me. ’ ’ 

Mr. Yates remained silent for some time, and 
then continued : 

“Well, Miss Seymour, I would advise you to say 
nothing to any one about these business complica- 
tions ; it will be better to adhere to your principle of 
managing your own affairs. I am sure you will find 
the outcome more satisfactory.” 

“Mrs. Rodgers is a very intelligent, discreet 
woman, and I shall feel it a great privilege to talk 
over this matter with her.” 

“I am sorry. Miss Seymour, that you do not see 
the wisdom of consulting your legal adviser instead 
of a woman who has no knowledge of legal pro- 
ceedings. ’ ’ 

“Why, Mr. Yates, I have consulted you and you 
have told me your opinion. Now I wish to know 
what Mrs. Rodgers thinks is best, and I am sure 
she is not so ignorant as you suppose.” 

“No disrespect to Mrs. Rodgers was intended, I 
assure you. I never have met her. No doubt she 
is a most estimable lady. Still, it is hardly probable 
she understands legal matters.” 


120 


In Primo. 


“Be that as it may, I must know what she thinks 
of these things.” 

But little more was said, and presently Mr. 
Yates asked for a carriage, as he wished to go out to 
attend to some business. 

' In the evening Mrs. Rodgers returned in time for 
dinner, when she met Mr. Yates. She received him 
in her usual quiet, cordial way. He was polite, but 
reserved, so the conversation was mostly between 
Mrs. Rodgers and myself. After dinner Mrs. 
Rodgers seemed so weary that I begged her to retire 
at once, resolving to speak to her in the morning. 

Aug.—, i8— .— 

Early this morning I sought Mrs. 
Rodgers and told her of Mr. Yates’ errand. She 
considered the matter for a few minutes, and then 
said: 

“Julia, in a case like this I think you need more 
than one lawyer, — especially so since Mr. Yates is 
legal adviser for Mr. Cooper, as well as yourself.” 

“Shall I tell him so?” 

“No, I think you would better let him return to 
the city with the understanding that you will inform 
him of your wishes later. You must not be hasty 
in your actions ; you ought to have good legal advice 
from some one having no connection with Mr. 
Cooper. I cannot tell you what to do.” 

Accordingly, when I saw Mr. Yates I told him I 
was still unable to make any decision. He looked 
angry, but spoke very quietly, saying: 

“That leaves nothing for me to do but to return 
to the city. Yesterday I ordered my partner to 
enter your protest.” 


In Prime. 


I2I 


“Please have it withdrawn until I am prepared to 
tell you, definitely, my decision. ” 

“Well, again I must ask you to say nothing that 
will involve me in trouble with Mr. Cooper. Should 
you be writing to Mr. Markham, I ask you par- 
ticularly not to mention the subject to him. His 
knowledge of legal proceedings is limited, and he is 
apt to muddle business matters generally. If he 
has anything to do with this, he will mismanage and 
complicate affairs so that it will be almost impos- 
sible to straighten them out. He thinks he under- 
stands a great deal, and would want to take every- 
thing out of your hands at once. After your visit to 
New York Mr. Markham seemed dissatisfied with 
what he called your childish attempts to manage 
affairs, and wanted to find a way to prevent your 
dictating so much. 

“It is not well to repeat such things, but it is 
necessary for you to understand the situation. You 
will save yourself considerable annoyance if you tell 
Mr. Markham nothing.” 

After Mr. Yates had gone I told Mrs. Rodgers 
what he had said about Mr. Markham. I was much 
provoked because Mr. Markham had spoken with so 
much contempt of my efforts to understand and 
manage my own affairs. 

“But,” Mrs. Rodgers remonstrated, “Mr. Mark- 
ham impresses me as a kind, honest man. To be 
sure, he cannot understand a lady’s being able to 
transact business, but that is nothing serious, since 
he cannot hinder your doing as you think best. If I 
were you I would at once telegraph for Mr. Mark- 
ham to come to Sunset.” 


122 


In Priino. 


So a telegram was sent asking Mr. Markham to 
come immediately. 

Aug.—, i8— .— 

As expected, Mr. Markham 
arrived at one o’clock to-day. After luncheon Mrs. 
Rodgers accompanied us to the library, where I told 
Mr. Markham of Mr. Yates’ visit and business. 
He was greatly astonished, and for a time could say 
nothing more than to express his surprise. Finally 
he exclaimed : 

“I can’t see what Yates means I He knows that 
it is impossible for Cooper to make good such a 
claim. Had Mr. Clayton died before Frank was 
drowned, of course the Coopers would have been 
Frank’s heirs ; as it is, — it is preposterous ! Why did 
you not tell him to see me about it?” 

“Mr. Yates objected to my telling any one about 
it, — -even Mrs. Rodgers; so I thought I would better 
see you myself. ’ ’ 

“Objected to your telling any one! What did he 
want you to do?” 

“He said I could give him directions as my legal 
adviser, and he would look after my interests.” 

“Well, well, well! I know it is generally con- 
sidered that people must look out for Mr. Yates; he 
is usually very quiet, but sharp, and always carries 
things to an issue favorable to himself. But this is 
a bold, rash piece of business, not in keeping with 
his usual shrewdness and carefulness. Did he make 
no suggestion as to what you would better do? He 
has been legal adviser to the Cooper family for 
years. Did he make no propositions?” 

“None that I could consider for a moment, and 


In Priiiio. 


123 


he asked me not to mention what he had suggested, 
saying it would injure him if it came to the knowl- 
edge of the Coopers. ” 

“Well, but I must know what those propositions 
were.” 

“I am afraid I ought not to tell. I made no 
promises, only saying that as I could not consider 
the proposition, it would be unnecessary for me to 
mention it. I would be sorry to injure Mr. Yates.” 

“Injure him! It is very evident he intends to 
injure you. Doubtless he has calculated upon your 
youth, inexperience, ignorance and conscientious- 
ness ; probably, too, he has noticed your indifference 
to more wealth than your personal needs require. 
It is imperative that I know what propositions he 
made, as it will probably put me in possession of 
the key to his whole scheme. It is your duty to tell 
me in self-defense.” 

“Yes, Julia,” said Mrs. Rodgers, “Mr. Markham 
is right. Yesterday morning when you told me 
what had been said, I knew Mr. Yates was dis- 
honest and trying to wrong you, but I did not want 
to arouse your suspicion lest he discover it. I knew 
there would be less trouble if he went away think- 
ing you were doubtful as to what you ought to do. 
I think, too, Mr. Markham, you ought to know 
that Mr. Yates especially objected to your knowing 
anything about the matter. ’ * 

“Worse and worse! Well, Miss Seymour?’ 

I then told Mr. Markham about Mr. Yates’ 
proposition concerning Sunset Park. He seemed 
more excited than ever, and at last said : 

“Ladies, you really must excuse me; I shall have 


124 


In Prime. 


to go out and think this over alone. This evening 
I will talk with you again.’* 

After dinner Mr. Markham began: “It will be 
necessary to employ a first-class lawyer and inform 
Mr. Yates that in so important a matter you wish 
to have the assistance of a lawyer who has no con- 
nection with the Cooper interest, and thus relieve 
him from the embarrassment of managing the 
affairs of two contending parties, and probably 
pleasing neither. Then your new lawyer must 
go into the case instructed by you to resist the 
Cooper claims.” 

After some further conversation, Mr. Markham 
continued : 

“I shall keep watch of the case. It will be best, 
however, for Mr. Yates not to know that you have 
seen me. If he asks who advised your employing 
additional legal help, say that your friends thought 
it best. If he objects, ask him why, and teil him 
you should suppose he would be glad to be relieved 
of some of the responsibility, and that you do not 
understand his insisting on keeping everything in 
his own hands. Maintain that since your friends so 
advise, you think it best to retain the services of the 
second lawyer. If possible, avoid talking of this 
matter alone with Mr. Yates. In any case be 
careful not to commit yourself to anything in any 
way. ’ ’ 

Mr. Markham also told us that although Mr. 
Clayton always kept a sharp watch on Mr. Yates, 
and much of the time had confidential legal advice 
from the best lawyers, Mr. Yates generally managed 
to get the better of them all. Nevertheless, Mr. 


In Primo. 


125 


Clayton continued to employ him because he himself 
always desired to get the best of a bargain, and 
for such work Mr. Yates answered his purpose 
better than most lawyers would. So, taking all in 
all, when losses and gains were balanced, Mr. 
Clayton found it to his interest to retain the services 
of Mr. Yates. 


CHAPTER X. 


Aug.—, i8— 

Yesterday being Sunday, Mr. 
Markham remained at Sunset Park until this morn- 
ing. He is anxious to secure the services of an able 
and honest lawyer, and says this affair will amount 
to nothing further than slightly alarming Mr. Yates 
and making it easier to get my business out of his 
hands, which he thinks must be done as soon as 
possible. 

“Mr. Markham,” I queried, “do you think it 
would have been wiser for me to have acted on 
your advice and not have troubled myself about 
business matters? Would it have been better to 
have told Mr. Yates I would leave everything in his 
hands, to act as he thought best?” 

“Now, Miss Seymour, you have not forgiven me 
for what Mr. Yates told you I said; but really, I 
did not speak contemptuously of you; I only 
expressed my doubt of the wisdom of a young girl 
undertaking to manage such a property as yours.” 

“Yes, but do you think it would have been better 
for me to have said, ‘Mr. Yates, I am a young girl 
and understand nothing about these things. I will 
do whatever you advise?’ ” 

“Your agent is the one to act for you; you should 
have referred the matter to me.” 

“But suppose you were like Mr. Yates, between 
you, what would have become of me? Mr. Yates 

126 


In Prime. 


127 


insisted that he was the man to attend to this affair 
and that you must have nothing to do with it. 
Evidently he thinks you would not enter into 
partnership in his conspiracy. But suppose you 
and he were agreed, and for the liberal reward 
which you believe Mr. Cooper is ready to offer, you 
were willing to act in Mr. Cooper’s behalf, what 
would become of my interests?” 

“I see by the mischievous twinkle in your eyes 
that you are making fun of the old gentleman.” 

“But really, Mr. Markham, I have been dreadfully 
provoked at you. If it had not been for Mrs. 
Rodgers, I do not know that I would have sent for 
you at all. It is true I am only a young girl, but I 
am trying hard to become a wise woman. I do not 
like it when you treat me like a child and dis- 
courage all my attempts to learn. You have not 
answered my question yet.” 

“Well, in this case it must be admitted that it is 
certainly fortunate that you are ambitious to be 
able to manage your own interests. Generally, 
however, ladies do well to keep out of business 
matters. ” 

“This,” said Mrs. Rodgers, “forcibly illustrates 
that intelligence, guided by an earnest desire to do 
right, will generally bring people through troubles 
made by those who intend to wrong them. The 
very characteristics which Mr. Yates depended upon 
to make his undertaking secure, are the ones that 
have frustrated his purposes. 

“It is evident, in the first place, that Mr. Yates 
calculated upon Julia’s being here alone with the 
servants, and that consequently there would be no 


128 


In Pnmo. 


one to advise her. Since he was surprised when she 
mentioned Mrs. Howard, Miss Berkely and myself, 
he probably supposed she had no friends to whom 
she could apply for counsel. 

“In the second place, he had noticed that she was 
not of an ambitious, avaricious nature, but that she 
was generous and conscientious. Her delight in 
Sunset Park led him to believe the possession of 
this home would satisfy her, and the fear of losing 
it cause her to secure it hastily by immediately 
making an assignment of all other property in favor 
of Mr. Cooper. Last of all, he considered his safety 
made doubly secure by her ignorance of legal pro- 
ceedings, and her inexperience in business matters. 
Apparently, he did not anticipate her reasoning so 
clearly that if Mr. Cooper’s claim were really just, 
she could not rightfully hold any part of the property. 

“Neither did Mr. Yates calculate upon Julia’s 
ability to comprehend the responsibility resting 
upon her, or to turn his own argument to her 
advantage, by reasoning that if the wishes of the 
original owners of the property were to be regarded, 
they must begin with the intentions of Mrs. Whit- 
tington’s grandfather. Having judgment to see this 
clearly, and love of justice to influence her decision, 
she was able to go to the root of the matter at once. 

“So, I am impressed with the thought that intel- 
ligence and common sense, controlled by an enlight- 
ened conscience and love of justice, will not fail to 
aid one in business complications. Therefore, I con- 
clude that it is not only safe, but a duty, for women 
as well as men, to supervise their own affairs.’’ 

“Perhaps, Mr. Markham,’’ said I, “this affair will 


In Prime. 


129 


help to impress you that I am in earnest when I 
say I intend to understand everything about my 
property and business. So, if you do not want the 
inconvenience of explaining things to me, and of 
my reserving the power of making final decisions, at 
the end of the year you can resign your position as 
agent to a school-girl. * ’ 

“Oh, I do not mind the trouble; I have only 
wished to save you annoyance. If you are satisfied 
with what I can do, and will not blame me for mis- 
takes when you act contrary to my advice, I shall 
manage to get on. ” 

“I think I am not likely to be dissatisfied with 
what you do, and shall probably need your advice 
for a long time to come. ’ * 

Aug.—, 18—.— 

Mr. Markham engaged a lawyer, 
Mr. Thurston, and sent him down to Sunset Park. 
At his dictation I wrote a letter of directions to him- 
self ; also one to Mr. Markham, and another to Mr. 
Yates; which he was to deliver in person. To-day 
I received a telegram stating that Mr. Cooper had 
withdrawn his claim, but demanded the payment of 
Mrs. Clayton’s dowry with legal interest on the 
same from the time it had been given into Mr. 
Clayton’s hands. Mr. Thurston also telegraphed me 
that the claim was illegal and could not be enforced ; 
but that to permit an investigation would give him 
a good opportunity to obtain a thorough knowledge 
of Mr. Clayton’s affairs during the last twenty 
years, which will be of great value to him, as he is 
to be employed in Mr. Yates’ place 'as soon as these 


130 


In Primo. 


matters are settled. I replied, instructing Mr. 
Thurston to ascertain the exact amount of the 
dowry, for if I have any money that came from the 
Cooper family I certainly want to restore it. 

Aug. — , i8.— .— 

Last night, on account of the 
excessive heat, I slept but little, and so rose very 
early this morning and went out into the garden. 
About seven o’clock I went around to the front of 
the house and had gone up the steps onto the 
verandah, when I heard a carriage coming up the 
drive. What was my surprise to see that it con- 
tained Mr. Yates and another gentleman! 

Mr. Yates greeted me in an unusually cordial 
manner, and introduced his companion as Mr. 
Cooper. I suppose I looked the surprise I felt, for 
Mr. Yates at once said: 

“You must excuse this unexpected and untimely 
visit. Finding there is such a complete misunder- 
standing of affairs, I thought it best to come at once 
and talk with you personally, instead of trusting to 
correspondence. 

“After Mr. Thurston’s call I went to see Mr. 
Markham and undertook to explain matters to him. 
He seemed very much excited over what he had 
heard and refused to assist me in straightening out 
the complication. Finding that alone I could 
accomplish nothing, I have brought Mr. Cooper, 
that you may learn from himself just what has been 
done.” 

They declined my invitation to breakfast, saying 
they were in haste to return to the city by the next 
train. Mr. Yates then said: 


In Prime. 


“We shall be greatly obliged if yon will grant us 
an interview at once.” 

I seated them in the library, saying: 

“If you will please excuse me I will rejoin you in 
a few minutes. I wish Mrs. Rodgers to be 
present.” 

“It is quite unnecessary to disturb Mrs. Rodgers 
at so early an hour, as this business concerns Mr. 
Cooper only.” 

Seeing my hesitation, Mr. Yates added: 

“Nothing will be said that will commit you to 
any course of action. Mr. Markham seems to have 
received a remarkable impression about my last 
interview with you. This, taken in connection with 
the extraordinary instructions you gave Mr. Thurs- 
ton and myself, made it imperative that Mr. Cooper 
and I see you at once. ’ ’ 

Wishing to ascertain whether he knew of Mr. 
Markham’s visit to Sunset, I asked: 

“What did Mr. Markham say?” 

“Oh, he told over what you had said of our inter- 
view ; as usual when he talks of business, he spoke 
loudly, using many words, and seemed indignant 
that I had not consulted him instead of coming to 
you, considering you, as he does, such a mere child. 
As he seemed quite convinced that I had attempted 
to take some advantage of you, I have come to 
inquire what you said that could have caused such 
an excitement.” 

“I only repeated what you said to me, and on 
advice of friends, employed Mr. Thurston to assist 
you in caring for my interests.” 

“The only thing he has done has been to confuse 


132 


In Primo. 


things and treat me as a suspicions character. How 
did you come to let Mr. Markham know anything 
about the affair?” 

“I see no objection to Mr. Markham’s knowing of 
it.” 

“Have you taken others into your counsel?” 

“I have told only those whose advice I needed. 
Please excuse me if I decline to mention names.” 

“You will, at least, tell me what you have said.” 

“Certainly. I told all you said to me.” 

“But as a personal favor I asked you not to 
mention certain items.” 

On each of Mr. Yates’ cheeks burned a bright 
spot, and it almost seemed as if lightning would flash 
from his eyes, but his voice continued low and 
steady. With great effort I remained outwardly 
calm, as I replied: 

“I found it necessary to tell all you had told me. ” 

“To whom?” 

“Excuse me, please, but I have already answered 
that question.” 

“Well, either you have seriously misunderstood 
me, or others have seriously misunderstood you. 
Where this misunderstanding lies is what I want to 
know. ’ ’ 

“I am sure that I did not misunderstand you; I 
am equally sure that I correctly reported our con- 
versation, and that my friends did not misunder- 
stand me. ” 

“The fact remains that some one has made a mis- 
take. Therefore we are here, and in Mr. Cooper’s 
presence I wish to state that on August — , I visited 
you and informed you that, inasmuch as it is well 


In Primo. 


133 


known that had Mr. Clayton anticipated his own 
and Frank’s sudden death, he would most certainly 
have left his property to Mr. Cooper’s family ; and 
that therefore Mr. Cooper feels that the property 
justly belongs to him. He now knows that I said 
that in all probability he would be willing for you 
to retain Sunset Park. 

“A different account of this interview has been 
given, and for this reason I asked Mr. Cooper to 
accompany me here and allow me in his presence to 
rehearse the conversation with you. Will you 
please tell him whether I have correctly stated 
what I then said?” 

“Your statement is certainly incomplete; you 
represented that Mr. Cooper had legal claims that 
the court would probably sustain, and urged 
immediate action.” 

“I certainly never stated that Mr. Cooper had a 
legal claim. I did tell you that in my opinion he 
would be satisfied to settle with you by letting you 
retain Sunset Park. As to my urging immediate 
action, I meant that by this means you would leave 
in Mr. Cooper’s mind no doubt as to your desire 
to deal justly. ” 

“You said nothing that led me to suppose you 
considered it necessary for me to make such a 
favorable impression on Mr. Cooper. What did 
you mean by saying you would telegraph your 
partner to enter my protest to Mr. Cooper’s claim?” 

“Mr. Cooper was waiting to learn whether you 
would concede the justness of his claim. In 
accordance with your directions I instructed my 
partner to inform him that you would protest it.” 


134 


In Primo. 


“Yon see, Miss Seymour,” began Mr. Cooper, “I 
did not know of the expressed wish of Mrs. Whit- 
tington’s grandfather. I heard that you did not 
care to own so much property, and also that you 
were very conscientious and just. Knowing that 
Mr. Clayton would have left his property to me had 
he known he would die childless, I supposed you 
would see the justice of carrying out his will. 

“Mr. Yates was mistaken in thinking I would be 
displeased at his proposition that if you would 
accept Sunset Park we might arrive at a settlement 
of mutual benefit. I had not told Mr. Yates of my 
plans further than to instruct him to express to you 
my opinion as to who was the true heir of the 
property. Had things been as I supposed, I intended 
to ask you to retain one-half the entire property, 
should you care to burden yourself with so much. 
As it is, you seem to have as good a right to your 
grandmother’s share as I have to what would have 
belonged to Mr. James Clayton, had the wishes of 
this grandfather been carried out. 

“However, if you do not feel disposed to admit 
the moral justice of my claim, we will let the 
matter drop; only I do not want to be represented 
as attempting to obtain your property by bringing 
a lawsuit against you.” 

“I am amazed at what you and Mr. Yates have 
said, inasmuch as it is far from being in accord with 
what Mr. Yates said to me the other day. But we 
need not discuss the matter further, since you say 
you do not intend to insist upon your claims. ” 

“But, Miss Seymour, your reports of our con- 
versation damaged Mr. Cooper’s character and 


In Primo. 


135 


injured my reputation as a lawyer. The merest law 
student, however dishonest, would have known 
better than to say that a merely moral claim would 
be sustained in the courts. I think you should give 
me a written statement clearing me of such unwise 
and dishonest intention.” 

“Believing you intended to represent the matter 
as I have related, it is impossible for me to give you 
such a statement. ’ ' 

“Oh, never mind, Yates; I am satisfied you did 
not intend to misrepresent me to Miss Seymour. I 
am also satisfied that Miss Seymour has done what, 
to her best knowledge and belief, is right. No one 
besides Markham and Thurston know much about 
it; you care nothing about the opinion of the former, 
and the latter is a lawyer of whom a man in your 
position need have no fear. So, Miss Seymour, as 
I am the one chiefly concerned, if you will pardon 
the annoyance we have given you, we will drop the 
matter.” 

Feeling as I did, that Mr. Cooper said this 
because he saw Mr. Yates could not make me 
believe that I had misrepresented him, I really did 
not know what to say; but Mr. Yates broke the 
awkward pause by observing: 

“Well, Mr. Cooper, as this part of our business is 
finished, shall we take up the question of Mrs. 
Clayton’s dowry?” 

“There is not much to be said about that. In 
accordance with Miss Seymour’s directions the 
matter is being investigated. When the accounts 
are made up, my son Albert will come to Sunset 
Park and settle with Miss Seymour. Whatever 


136 


In Prime. 


accrues to us from this source I have decided to turn 
over to Albert, so I shall leave him to attend to the 
finishing up of the business. ’ ’ 

They would not remain at breakfast, but hastened 
back to the village. As he shook hands, Mr. Cooper 
said: 

“Now, Miss Seymour, don’t you disturb yourself 
thinking I want to take away your money. I only 
supposed you did not care for it, and would be glad 
to get rid of it, in which case I felt I had the best 
right to it.” 

Aug.—, 18—.— 

Immediately after the departure 
of Mr. Yates and Mr. Cooper I sent a telegram to 
Mr. Markham, in response to which Mr. Thurston 
arrived to-day. 

After hearing my account of the interview on 
Friday, Mr. Thurston advised me to write him a 
letter instructing him to settle Mr. Cooper’s claim. 
At his dictation I also wrote letters to Mr. Yates 
and Mr. Cooper informing them that I expected to 
be from home for some time, and referred all claims 
to Mr. Thurston for settlement, declining any 
further interviews on the subject. 


CHAPTER XL 


Aug.—, i8— 

To-day, Mrs. Rodgers, Parsons 
and I drove to the camp-ground. It is beautifully 
situated in a grove on a bluff which slopes down to 
a little river. As we neared the ground, through 
the openings here and there we caught glimpses of 
the white tents and pretty cottages nestling among 
the trees. When we came in sight of our green and 
white cottage we saw Mrs. Tate standing in the door 
to welcome us. 

Inside the cottage everything looked cozy, cool 
and comfortable. Mrs. Rodgers and I occupy the 
two front rooms upstairs, and Mrs. Tate and Parsons 
share a room in the rear of mine. Mrs. Tate was 
quite disturbed because I have no dressing-room, 
but I find it no hardship to dispense with a few 
luxuries for the next two weeks, especially when I 
remember my, cramped and inconvenient room at 
Fledding. Mrs. Rodgers says that when people 
exchange inconvenience and limited means for 
luxury and abundance, they are apt to become exact- 
ing and unable to endure discomfort. However 
that may be, I am delighted with my room, which 
is twelve feet square, and from off each corner of 
which is cut a small closet. The white China 
matting, fresh, white muslin curtains, light, easy, 
cane chairs and my tiny, white-draped bed, give 
137 


In Primo. 


the room a simple but dainty appearance. Mrs. 
Rodgers is also pleased with her room, which is the 
counterpart of mine. 

The other rooms upstairs are occupied by our 
home people who have come to look after the cottage 
and cook meals for our establishment, as well as to 
enjoy the meetings. At Mrs. Rodgers’ suggestion, 
in order that all in the cottage may have more of 
these opportunities, she and I will care for our own 
rooms, and, assisted by Parsons, will keep in order 
the sitting-room down stairs. 

On the first floor we have a large front room, 
forty feet long and twenty feet wide, fitted up so 
that it can be used as a sitting-room or a prayer 
meeting room. A heavy curtain hangs across the 
center of this parlor, which can be drawn if we 
wish to be alone when others are occupying the front 
part. Mr. Brooks is pleased with this arrangement, 
and we have invited him to use the room whenever 
he desires to do so. Also, our people from Sunset 
and the farms have been told they are welcome to 
come in and sit here when they want to rest. Back 
of this large room is a dining-room fifteen feet 
square, which we can use also as a private sitting- 
room when the large room is used for prayer-meet- 
ings. The kitchen is ten feet square, with pantries 
and closets. The stairway opens from the dining- 
room, so that we can be quite private in our living, 
although such a large portion of the cottage is 
given up to the public. 

Mr. Brooks says that if all who are able to do so 
would provide accommodations for a few who could 
not otherwise attend, much more would be accom- 


In Prime. 


139 


plished. I am glad he is pleased with our arrange- 
ment. 

After resting, Mrs. Rodgers and I walked over the 
ground. I was much interested in watching the peo- 
ple as they came, and in the unloading of their provi- 
sions and furniture. Here and there, too, men were 
putting up canvas tents, or giving finishing touches to 
newly built cottages. All were hurrying to complete 
their work, as the first services of the camp-meet- 
ing will be held this evening. 

People say there will be a large attendance and 
that even more would come if they could afford to 
buy or rent cottages. Referring to what Mr. 
Brooks said, Mrs. Rodgers observed that by build- 
ing a large house with many small dormitories and 
a large general sitting-room in which meetings could 
be held, some wealthy person could bring a large 
number of people within the influence of the meet- 
ings. Perhaps the people on my farms and many of 
their neighbors will come next year if I provide 
such a building. 

Mrs. Rodgers is quite familiar with all these 
things which are so new and interesting to me. 

Aug. — , 18—.— 

Mr. Brooks has introduced me to 
a number of young people from Hampton and I am 
becoming very well acquainted with them and their 
friends. Miss Nellie Millburn, who is a teacher in 
the high-school at Hampton, will make a pleasant 
companion for me while I am at Sunset. She is a 
fresh, wholesome, rosy-looking, fair faced girl, with 
light brown hair and blue eyes, and is a cheerful, 
happy-hearted, earnest Christian. 


140 


In Primo. 


I am also greatly interested in Miss Margaret 
Case, largely on account of her peculiar religious 
views. She is tall and slight, with dark complexion, 
black, waving hair and intense black eyes. When 
calm and undisturbed, she is pale, but when inter- 
ested, or animated, the color constantly flames and 
fades in her face. If much excited her whole frame 
is in a tremor. Miss Case is not a Christian and 
seems to be quite skeptical. She devides Christians in- 
to two classes, namely, hypocrites and self-deceivers. 

This evening Miss Millburn told me that Miss 
Case has had a sad exprience. Her parents died 
three years ago, leaving her little besides their good 
name. Since then she has been engaged in teach- 
ing. Her relatives seem to be cold-hearted, indiffer- 
ent people. A wealthy aunt belonging to a city 
church in which she has obtained a reputation for 
liberality, expects her niece to pay her a week’s visit 
once a year, and then manifests no further desire to 
see her until the next year’s visit. 

Another aunt, in less affluent circumstances, is 
very attentive to her rich sister, who rewards her 
with the cast-off clothing of her family, which the 
poorer sister remodels for her own children. But 
the homeless orphan niece receives little attention 
from this aunt, further than to be occasionally 
welcomed as a guest for two or three days. 

The bachelor uncle offers advice, but does not 
disturb his mind, nor interrupt his questionable 
amusements by giving any anxious consideration to 
the happiness and welfare of his niece. 

Miss Case’s high-strung, proud nature causes her 
to refer rarely to her lonely, penniless condition, 


In Primo. 


which she feels very keenly. Her suffering finds 
expression in her assuming a cynical attitude 
towards the world generally. Unfortunately, she 
has come in contact with a number of half-hearted 
Christians, whose discreditable dealings have stung 
her afresh. Not having intimate acquaintance with 
true Christians, it is not strange that she antagonizes 
the only Christianity which has come under her 
observation. Recently she has made the acquaint- 
ance of Miss Millburn, to whom she has become 
warmly attached. 

Aug. — , 18—.— 

To-day I met another bright, good- 
natured, fun-loving girl. Miss May Harris, whose 
parents are attending this meeting. Miss May does 
not question the truth of the Bible nor the reality of 
Christian experience. But when any one asks her 
why she is not a Christian, she laughs and says 
there are enough people making a failure of it now, 
without her adding another to the throng. To-day 
some one suggested: 

“Suppose, Miss May, you become an earnest 
Christian and show the others how.” 

She laughed merrily, her eyes dancing with mis- 
chief as she replied: 

“Couldn’t do it! That’s just the trouble. Don’t 
believe I could do as well as you people are doing — 
so why make matters worse than they are?” And 
she ran off to join a passing group of girls. After 
she was out of hearing, the one who had been 
talking to her remarked: 

“May knows her duty and she takes this way to 
quiet her conscience.” 


142 


In Primo. 


I wonder of this is so. What a strange thing is 
the human heart ! The more I question my own and 
study others, the more I am perplexed. 

Miss Douglas, who often leads young people’s 
prayer-meetings in the tents, attracts me. Her 
manner is quiet though cordial. Usually she takes 
very little part in conversation, but is an attentive 
listener and careful observer. Therefore, when she 
does speak her remarks are well suited to the 
occasion, and she never fails to make an impression. 

Aug. — , i8— 

This afternoon several of us were 
sitting on rustic seats around the trunk of a large 
tree. As is usually the case here, the conversation 
turned upon the subject of religion. A young man 
remarked : 

“Well, really, when you think about it, it does 
seem strange, when we have only a lifetime here, 
and an eternity beyond, that we should not give our 
whole effort to preparing for the hereafter.’’ 

A young girl who had been making sport of every- 
thing, replied: 

“Oh, I don’t know. I am having a pretty good 
time here. I mean to go right on and make sure of 
as much fun out of this world as I can. This life 
lasts a long time anyway.’’ 

“Yes, but according to their accounts, Christians 
are having a good time, too, and they say they are 
making sure of a good time hereafter,’’ objected the 
young man. 

“I declare, Fred Williams, I believe you will 
make a Methodist preacher yet!’’ 

“No, that is the queer thing about it. I believe it 


In Primo 


i43 


is my duty to be a Christian, and I see the wisdom 
of such a course ; yet I am in no way inclined to 
make any change by becoming one. Miss Case, do 
you not think this a strange thing?” 

“If I believed in what people call the Christian 
religion I should not hesitate a moment in making 
a decision. But never having had any proof of the 
genuineness of the Christianity of those who profess 
it, I am in no way inclined to number myself with 
them.” 

May Harris sprang to her feet, exclaiming: 

“Do you mean to say that Nellie Millburn’s 
Christianity is not genuine?” 

“Miss Millburn is naturally an honest, good girl; 
she and some others think it is because she is a 
Christian ; but had she never heard of the Bible she 
would have been just as she is.” 

“No, Margaret,” replied Nellie, “that is a mis- 
take. Mamma would tell you that before I was a 
Christian, everything was smooth with me until my 
will was crossed; then I was frantically rebellious 
and difficult to control. 

“When I was little more than two years old, one 
day mamma undertook to compel my obedience. 
Displeased because my porridge was not in the dish 
I wanted, I threw my spoon on the floor; mamma 
told me to pick up the spoon ; stamping my feet and 
shaking my head, I cried, ‘No! no! no!’ Coaxing, 
commanding, punishing, failed to bring me to the 
yielding point. 

“After struggling for an hour, I dropped down 
on the floor and fell asleep, exhausted, but unyield- 
ing. Mamma, as tired as myself, left me for a 


144 


In Prime. 


time, and when I awoke, renewed the struggle. I 
went to bed unconquered, and in the morning was 
tied in a high chair and placed in a corner of the 
room to meditate. At the end of two hours I began 
to call “Mamma!” When again placed on the floor I 
picked up the spoon, handed it to mamma and burst 
into an angry fit of crying. 

“As a result of my passion I was ill for several 
days. Mamma did not consider that I had yielded 
in an obedient spirit, but simply to regain my 
liberty. She says that until I was converted I 
never willingly gave up having my own way. So 
you see, however different I may now be in this 
respect, it cannot be set down to the credit of my 
naturally meek and submissive spirit, but is entirely 
due to grace.” 

Fred Williams observed: “Surely you have made 
out a clear case. Miss Millburn has given us strong 
proof of the power of Christianity to change human 
character. ’ ’ 

“But,” objected Miss Case, “you do not take into 
consideration that probably Miss 'Millburn had 
reached a period when she saw the unreasonableness 
of her willfulness She is naturally just and 
honorable; when she realized that her unwilling- 
ness to yield her wishes to others sometimes 
defrauded them of their rights, it would not have 
been in harmony with her nature to insist upon 
pleasing herself. ” 

“Oh, that does not necessarily follow,” returned 
Fred Williams. “At least it is not the case with 
most people. Of course, many strong willed people, 
because they are just and honorable, will yield to 


In Primo. 


145 


others when they consider it to be their duty ; but this 
alone would not cause them humbly and graciously to 
give up their desires, and even suffer inj ustice rather 
than persist in what they believe to be in itself right, 
when by denying themselves, they may relieve 
others from distress or inconvenience. For example : 
yesterday when Grandmother Brown took a fancy, 
that on account of the unusual crowd that had come 

to hear Dr. L , it was unsafe to lock up the 

Bedford cottage and leave it alone as usual, there 
were some discontented and cross looks, with a pros- 
pect of crosser words, as grandma pathetically 
announced that no more need be said, for she herself 
would stay. But Miss Millburn restored peace by 
immediately agreeing to remain in the cottage. 
Had I not a short time before heard Miss Millburn 
express delight at the prospect of an opportunity to 

gratify a life-long desire to hear Dr. L , I never 

would have guessed that missing the sermon would 
be a disappointment. ” 

“Yes,” exclaimed May, “and I was as provoked as 
I could be at Grandma Brown. I would have let her 
stay if she thought some one must remain, for there 
was not the slightest need of it. Nellie stayed just 
to gratify the whim of a childish old lady. ’ ’ 

“Well, Miss Case,” continued Fred Williams, 
“how do you account for Miss Millburn ’s action in 
this instance? She certainly was not actuated by a 
sense of justice or honor. Had I been called on to 
reason out to whom the sermon would do most good. 
Grandmother Brown or Miss Millburn, surely I must 
have decided in favor of the latter. So, how do you 
account for this occurrence?” 


146 


In Prinio. 


“I must reply to your question by asking another. 
How do you account for the failure of Christianity 
to produce such results in others?” 

“Fair play!” cried May. “We must first come to 
an understanding about Nellie Millburn. Then we 
will attend to these others in time. How can you 
account for Nellie’s action yesterday on other ground 
than that it was an example of what Christian grace 
can do?” 

“I can only say that out of a number of professing 
Christians with whom I am acquainted, hers is a 
very exceptional case. We cannot always account 
for exceptions to general rules.” 

“Very well,” rejoined May, “then by common 
consent we must admit that if it cannot be explained 
on the ground of Christian experience, it cannot be 
accounted for at all. I am satisfied to leave it there. 

“Now, I am ready to join in a tirade against the 
general order of Christians. Will Miss Case open 
the discussion?” 

“I did not wish to enter upon a discussion, and 
only intended answering Mr. Williams’ question by 
asking why Christianity does not have a similarly 
modifying effect upon a woman with whom I 
boarded last summer. She is a professing Christian, 
an enthusiastic Methodist, a great missionary as far 
as words go; very much opposed to dancing, the- 
aters and games. Yet all this did not prevent her pil- 
fering little things from my trunk. As she intended 
sending her daughter away to school, some dainty 
handkerchiefs with which I had provided myself 
probably struck her as a desirable supplement to her 
daughter’s outfit. Missing them, I locked both my 


In Prime. 


147 


trunks. Fearing I might lose the keys if I took 
them with me, I hid them in a drawer under a pile 
of towels, and went out to spend the day. The 
large trunk had a peculiar lock and was not easy to 
fasten. One of the three hinges of the smaller 
trunk was broken, and it was difficult to adjust the 
lid so the trunk could be locked. 

“Returning just at tea time, I noticed that my 
landlady looked much disturbed, and wondered what 
troubled her. When I went to my room I found 
both my trunks unlocked ! Looking for the keys, I 
found them in a different place in the drawer from 
where I had left them. Evidently, the lady had, for 
some reason, opened my trunks; and, unable to 
refasten them, became alarmed, and hastily throw- 
ing the keys into the drawer, fled from her field of 
operations. 

“I would like to hear an explanation as to what 
effect grace has had on this person.” 

“Now it is my turn,” called out May. “I am 
especially interested in this sort of discussion ; it is 
comforting to one of my turn of mind. You see, it 
would be pretty hard for me to be a model Christian 
like Nellie, — just enough and no more. So, the 
more I hear of inconsistent Christians, the more 
excuse I have for continuing in my own wicked 
course. Now, it will particularly help me to tell 
this story. It is perfectly true, for it happened in 
my uncle’s home. 

“My uncle is as nearly a perfect Christian as it is 
possible for any one to be. I am glad there are not 
many like him, for if there were, very shame would 
compel me to try to be good. Well, this uncle of 


148 


In Primo* 


mine is a Methodist minister. Once he was preach- 
ing in a place where the people were so good, — at 
least they said they were, — and so religious, so truly 
devoted to the church, and loved their pastor so 
much that they could never quite finish telling about 
it. 

“My uncle had five children, and the parsonage 
contained seven rooms. When you consider that a 
pastor needs a parlor in which to receive his rich 
parishioners, a study in which to work, a dining- 
room in which to eat, and a kitchen in which to cook, 
you can make a close calculation as to how snugly 
my uncle’s family were packed into that seven- 
roomed parsonage. 

“For reasons too evident to require an explanation, 
my uncle was not a rich man. The fact is, that 
after moving, settling down into the seven-roomed 
parsonage (please do not forget there were just 
seven rooms, and by way of description I will add 
that two of these were just eight feet square), break- 
ages replaced and damages repaired, he had twenty 
dollars in his pocket. He hoped the official board 
would soon inquire into his immediate financial 
needs. 

‘ ‘ The brethren and sisters came to church if it did 
not rain, or they were not too tired; and they 
listened appreciatively to his sermons (when they 
were there). A month passed and the twenty 
dollars were gone. Something had to be done. 
Uncle was one of those sensitive rAien who cannot 
remind people of their duty when they owe that duty 
to himself, so he could not tell the Board of 
Stewards that they ought to see that their pastor 


In Prime. 


149 


received his salary. The last Saturday of the last 
week of the quarter came. It was nine o’clock in 
the evening. I forgot to mention that in the mean- 
time Aunt had parted with some of her carefully 
saved wedding presents, and uncle had sold a 
number of his precious books, to procure food during 
the third month of their stay in the place. 

“Uncle had retired to his study, once more to ask 
God to help him in his trouble, when there came a 
knock at the door. On opening it he found a man 
who asked him to come with him to a certain part of 
the city, to marry him, which he did, and received 
one dollar for his services. He then went to the 
provision stores, but found all save one, closed for 
the night. He purchased sufficient to last over 
Sunday and went home. 

“He told no one outside of his family of his 
experience, but early the next week the people gave 
him a surprise donation party, and brought an 
abundance of provisions, besides a good sum of 
money. 

“You see, what I especially admire in those 
people was the peace and quietness of mind in which 
they were capable of enjoying their own abundance, 
all through those three months, without inquiring 
about the needs of their pastor; and then giving him 
a donation when they owed him a quarter’s salary. 
Really, a wicked girl like me almost envies them 
the Christian experience that enabled them happily 
and contentedly to go on their way to heaven, with 
such sublime indifference to the welfare of their 
minister. ’’ 

Miss Case asked: “Will some one explain to 


In Primo. 


15Q 

me in what respect Christian grace had improved 
these people?” 

Nellie leaned forward eagerly, saying: “Oh, but 
you forget the sublime faith of the minister! He 
could well afford to go through the painful part of 
the experience, that he might have such a blessed 
lesson about God’s mighty love to him. And as an 
answer to Miss Case’s question, I would ask, how will 
you explain the motive that led that minister to bear 
all that, and still patiently go on with his work as a 
Christian minister?” 

May called out, “No discussion of the main issue 
until all the witnesses have been heard. Who next?’ ’ 


CHAPTER XII. 


“That remind^ me,” began Oscar Black, “of my 
boarding place last winter. The lady of the house 
had an aged, invalid father living with her. As 
he was unable to come downstairs, his meals were 
carried to his room. I noticed that after we had 
finished our meals, this model Christian daughter 
would take a clean plate, put on it whatever was 
left on the table, sometimes even taking pieces from 
the plates from which we had eaten, and send it to 
his room. I am quite sure that poor old man never 
had a hot meal. 

“I have heard this daughter, a middle-aged woman 
herself, make very sad complaints about the extra 
trouble caused by her old father. Once she told me 
how, a short time before, he had been seriously ill, 
and from what she said, he must have suffered a 
great deal ; she told me that for some time, every 
morning, when she went to his room she expected to 
find him dead ! She told all this as if she were the 
one to be pitied, instead of the poor old man left 
to suffer alone all night. 

“Finally, I became so disgusted with her selfish- 
ness, cruelty and greed, that I removed to another 
boarding place.” 

Miss Case remarked: “Judging from my own 
observations and experience in dealing with pro- 
fessing Christians, these stories pretty nearly repre- 
sent their average conduct. Can you explain in 
what way grace has improved them?” 


152 


In Prime. 


“Now, Miss Case, ” protested May, “you must wait 
until we have heard all the evidence.” 

“Well then, Miss Harris,” began Will Thompson, 
“I have an uncle who is a physician. He gets 
exasperated with professing Christians who talk so 
much about doing good, but never do anything. I 
heard him tell of being called to visit a very sick 
babe whose mother was a church member. They 
were both anxious about its condition. While 
talking about it they heard a child crying, as if in 
great distress. The mother, hastily laying her babe 
in the cradle, ran out of doors. Presently she 
returned, saying that it was not one of her children. 

“ ‘But,’ asked the doctor, ‘did you find out what 
was the matter with the child?’ 

“ ‘No.’ 

“ ‘ Did you see where the child was?’ 

“ ‘No.’ 

“The doctor at once went out and in the alley 
found a little child, terrified almost into convulsions 
by a large dog that was not even looking at him ; 
but he was as much frightened as if it had been a 
mad dog. The doctor relieved the child, and on 
returning to the house, found the mother quite angry 
with him. She exclaimed : 

“ ‘I suppose you can prescribe for my child better 
now.’ 

“ ‘ Yes, madam, I can,’ he replied. 

“That is a specimen of the stories he tells of his 
experience as a medical practitioner, and they are 
about professing Christians as frequently as others. ” 

“Now, Miss Case,” warned May, “you are to say 
nothing until all have spoken. Who next?” 


In Primo. 


153 


“My brother/’ responded Miss Chaffe, “is also a 
doctor. Last winter an unfortunate girl who had 
been turned out of doors by her father, was very ill. 
My brother notified the ladies of the church to 
which my mother belongs, that the girl was in a 
dying condition, and utterly without food or warm 
clothing. She had been found in a deserted shanty. 
They said: ‘Let the poormaster look after her.’ 
As she had wandered there from another town, the 
poormaster declined to act, saying that he had had 
trouble enough with cases from other towns. If they 
waited until matters were adjusted with the town 
from which she came, the girl would die. These 
church ladies finally furnished her with a few old 
bed quilts, and the business men of the town con- 
tributed a little money. My mother, the minister’s 
wife and the doctor did the rest, and took care of 
that girl through a three-months’ illness. When 
she was able to be moved, my mother brought her 
home, kept her until she was strong, and then 
found her a place to work in another city. 

“Shortly after this, revival services were held in 
the church. One of the members asked my brother 
to come to the meetings and become a Christian. 
He replied, ‘No, madam! If yours is the only sort 
of Christianity there is, I should consider myself 
disgraced by possessing it. You go around to 
society and ladies’ meetings, to church festivals and 
missionary gatherings ; in Sunday-school you teach 
a class of well dressed children of rich parents ; in 
prayer-meeting you pray for such respectable 
sinners as I am. But if a Magdalene pass near 
you, you gather your silken robes about you lest 


154 


In Prime. 


you be contaminated. She may be sick, freeze and 
die, but your dainty feet never step within her room 
to relieve her sufferings, and by this means, perhaps 
win her to a better life. You are not like Him 
whom you call “Savior.” He never shrank from 
helping the lowest and vilest of sinners that needed 
help. I am better than you are, for I am like Him 
in one thing, at least. He scorned hypocrites and I 
scorn you.’ ” 

“Now, Edd Butterworth, you have told us 
nothing yet.” 

“As Miss Harris seems to be class-leader and has 
called on me, I suppose I must say something, 
whether or no. Luckily, I am prepared. 

“In G , where I resided a few years ago, lived 

a rich, active Christian lady whose husband was 
dead. She taught in the Sunday-school, helped in 
all church enterprises and was the life of all social 
church gatherings. She was popular with all 
classes, and the rich people of the church almost 
overwhelmed her with favors. 

“By one of those strange turns of fortune, as 
suddenly as unexpectedly, she found herself a poor 
woman, with an income of about four hundred 
dollars a year. In addition to her other misfortunes 
she fell ill, first with nervous prostration; then a fall 
so injured her spine that she was never able to sit 
up again. 

“Hoping to stem the tide, she did not at first make 
known her straitened circumstances. Hearing of 
her illness, her professed friends thronged the house, 
making anxious inquiries and almost burying with 
flowers the table, mantels, and whatever would 


In Primo. 


155 


hold them. No doubt some of these people planned 
for her funeral, and in their hearts schemed how 
they might obtain a desirable prominence by pro- 
viding floral offerings that in beauty and artistic 
arrangement should surpass those of their rival 
neighbors. 

“After a few days it began to be whispered about 
that Mrs. Truby was not only almost penniless, but 
that her creditors were preparing to dispose of the 
mansion in which she lived, and that she had 
engaged board with a poor woman who lived in a 
five-roomed cottage. Her friends said little of their 
intentions, but one by one they ceased visiting her, 
and by the time she was settled in the cottage she 
rarely saw her old associates. In a short time it 
really seemed as if no such person had ever moved 

in the social circles of G , so completely did she 

seem to have been forgotten. 

“A few friends remained faithful. To one of 
these she once remarked that, since her former 
friends could receive no further benefit at her 
hands, they troubled themselves no more about her. 

“So, there she lay for weeks at a time, without 
seeing a friend. The woman with v/hom she 
boarded was kind to her, but she, too, was poor, and 
largely dependent upon her own exertions for a 
livelihood; so Mrs. Truby had many hours of 
loneliness and suffering. Her mind preyed upon 
itself and finally gave way; soon after, she died a 
raving maniac, without doubt a victim to the cruel 
indifference and selfishness of the church she had 
served so faithfully in better days. 

“Some thought she ought to have had sufficient 


156 


In Prime. 


strength of character and Christian faith to have 
upheld her in her afflictions, and that was about all 
they said. 

“Of her long suffering from nervous diseases, the 
agoii}^ from her spinal trouble, the days and nights 
during which she could not sleep, the loneliness 
and friendlessness of her situation, — these never 
received any consideration. 

“The fact was, her former friends found it more 
agreeable to prepare papers to be read at the 
various church gatherings, than to do anything so 
obscure as visiting and cheering a dying woman, who 
could do nothing in return for such kindness. It 
was more popular to be members of the various 
church committees, and much easier to manifest 
their interest in words than in deeds. ' ’ 

Miss May then called on me, but I excused my- 
self on the ground that I lacked experience, although 
the little that I had observed led me to an unques- 
tioning belief in the genuineness of Christianity. I 
did not mention them, but I thought of Esther, Mrs. 
Rodgers and Mrs. Tate. However, asking pardon 
if I overstepped my privilege, I remarked that I had 
noticed that the narrators failed to call attention to 
the examples of true Christian conduct on the part 
of several of the people referred to. 

“Well, Miss Douglas,” proceeded May, “you have 
said nothing. I think you should be appointed 
judge, sum up the evidence, and give a decision on 
the question discussed.” 

“It seems to me,” responded Miss Douglass, “that 
all we have heard does not invalidate the evidence 
of Miss Millburn’s Christianity, while, as Miss 


In Prime. 


157 


Seymour has intimated, it does bring into prominent 
relief several fine examples of true, earnest 
Christian life. Moreover, were we each called on to 
give examples of real Christian living, as Miss 
Seymour also intimated, we must each turn witness 
to the reality of Christian experience. Even Miss 
Case, since she cannot account for Miss Millburn’s 
peculiar spirit of self-denial on other ground than 
that of Christian grace, must testify to knowing at 
least one person whose Christianity cannot be suc- 
cessfully denied. Since there is one such genuine 
example, even were there no others (and we know 
there are), I must conclude that Christianity is a 
fact; and that with one such example before us, we 
are responsible if we do not obey its teachings. 
This proved, our next step must be to pronounce 
judgment upon the accused. 

“Concerning the pretenders to Christianity of 
whom we have just heard, we will not condemn 
them to any worse punishment than that which has 
already overtaken them. I can conceive of nothing 
more terrible than to have such a character, and to 
know one’s self guilty of such contemptible and 
wicked conduct, as in the various cases cited, to say 
nothing of the merited scorn they receive from 
Christians and doubters alike. 

“Surely, those of us who pray, must realize 
their danger, and we will ask God mercifully to 
awaken them to a knowledge of their dreadful con- 
dition. 

“As for us, can we fail to see that these sad 
recitals are but cumulative proof of the need of con- 
secrated Christian lives, and that we should, as far as 


158 


In Primo. 


possible, counteract the diabolical influences going 
out from such lives as those depicted? 

“May, will not people ask wherein Judge and Mrs. 
Harris have failed, that their daughter should remain 
indifferent about her own salvation and that of 
others? Our Savior said, ‘He that is not with me is 
against me. 

“For myself, I never before felt so deeply the pro- 
found necessity of walking close to God, lest I, too, 
become a stumbling block and rock of offense to 
others. Let us pray. 

“Our Heavenly Father: 

“Here, under these solemn circumstances, listen- 
ing to these most appalling accounts of the crimes 
and unfaithfulness of those who falsely call them- 
selves Christians, we bow before Thee, to ask Thy 
forgiveness for our own sins of omission and 
commission. 

“We pray Thee to help us never to forget that a 
most awful responsibility rests upon us each, as 
individuals; that each of us must say: 

‘ A charge to keep I have, 

A God to glorify, 

A never-dying soul to save. 

And fit it for the sky.’ 

“May each of us improve this opportunity to 
beseech Thee, 

‘Help me to watch and pray. 

And on Thyself rely, 

Assured if I my trust betray, 

I shall forever die.’ 

“We also ask Thee to stamp indelibly upon our 
hearts the solemn truth, that through our refusal to 


In Primo. 


159 


obey Thy commands, we may not only lose our own 
souls, but may also become responsible to Thee for 
the loss of others, whom our lives may influence. 

“We ask all this in the great name of Christ. 
Amen. “ 

Aug. — , 18—.— 

Last evening while Miss Douglass 
was talking May Harris began to sob, and con- 
tinued weeping while we were praying. When we 
rose from our knees, she broke away from us and ran 
to her cottage. Finding the services at the stand 
closed, we all quietly went home. 

Although I did not retire until about one o’clock 
and did not sleep until three hours later, I rose in 
time for the sunrise prayer-meeting. All things 
considered, I am glad that I was the only one of our 
last evening party who was present. 

The leader prefaced his remarks by stating that, on 
the previous evening, he had gone to a retired place 
to meditate and prepare for the morning meeting. 
While there he had been interrupted by a con- 
versation which had greatly exercised him, and pre- 
vented his concentrating his thought upon any 
theme. Then, to my consternation, he proceeded to 
give an account of our last night’s discussion, and 
followed this with an exhortation, adding: 

“Brethren, I will ask each of you to answer for 
himself the question : What is there in my life to 
make Christianity lovely and desirable to the young? 

“Have we not been making serious mistakes? 
While there must not be the least abatement of 
earnestness in insisting upon outward religious 
observances, and in demanding an appearance of 


i6o 


In Primo. 


Christian sweetness and peace, there ought to be no 
neglect in dealing thoroughly with selfishness. Chris- 
tians should be constantly warned against becoming 
so absorbed in their own interests that they forget 
the consideration due to those around them. 

“These young people come into our homes as 
sons and daughters, as relatives, boarders or guests. 
While I trust that none present have been guilty of 
the atrocious crimes of which I heard last night, it 
may be well for you and me often to ask, as one of 
old once asked of a king in Israel, ‘What hath he 
seen in thine house?’ 

“When cases of need have come to us, have we 
said in deeds, if not in the plain words I have so 
often heard from the lips of other people, ‘I have 
enough of my own to care for,’ or ‘Charity begins at 
home, ’ or ‘ Mr. so and so should attend to this — he 
is rich and has the time’? And thus, because we are 
unwilling to forego something we desire to do or 
have, or because we are unwilling to undertake what 
we think another should do, the sick are uncared for; 
the sad hearted left to despair; the sorrowing are 
not comforted; the hungry are not fed. Do we 
think the grounds upon which we excuse ourselves 
cause the suffering of these afflicted ones to be less? 
With full knowledge of suffering within reach of our 
homes, how often do we sit down to our well 
supplied tables, and thoroughly enjoy the palatable 
meal provided for us, without a thought of the less 
fortunate? Does the knowledge of their suffering 
ever prevent our enjoying profound, refreshing 
slumber in our comfortable beds? 

“ ‘Oh,’ you say, ‘I cannot be supposed to know of 


In Prime. 


i6i 


and alleviate all the trouble in the city or country ; 
if one were to undertake to hunt up all the people 
who are in distress, there would be time for nothing 
else. Moreover, were I to spend all my time and sub- 
stance in that way, I would soon be as bad off as the 
worst, and need help myself. Besides, people who 
do right are never in such trouble. ’ 

“Well, suppose we knew that we or our children, 
at some future time, through misfortune, would be 
situated as some of these are ; suppose, even, that in 
some way we fall into wrong-doing, which eventually 
brings us to destitution and suffering; what would 
we want Christian people to do? When we are able 
to answer that question, we shall be prepared to 
understand our duty to those who are now thus 
circumstanced. 

“Our young people are taking note of what 
manner of Christians we are; they read us very 
readily. If those in our homes see in us selfishness 
and indifference to others; if they see that we are 
interested in them only to the extent of making a 
very close calculation, as to how little comfort and 
attention we can give them in return for the amount 
they pay for their board; or how much we may 
benefit socially, or in any other way, from their 
presence in our homes ; or that we are more inter- 
ested in the worldly interests of our sons and 
daughters than in their spiritual welfare, these young 
people are quick to draw conclusions. 

“On the other hand, while, if these young people 
are boarders, we make it clearly understood that we 
admit them as such as a business matter, and expect 
a fitting remuneration; or if they are with us as 


i 62 


In Prinio. 


guests or relatives, that we expect from them not 
only courtesy, but loyal, true friendship ; or if they 
are our sons and daughters, that we expect the 
obedience, reverence and consideration due from 
children to their parents; we must also give them 
reason to know we are not only apparently, but 
really interested in their well-being in every way; 
that we truly love them. We may be sure that such 
kindness prepares for us a way by which we can 
greatly influence them for good. 

“I am thoroughly convinced that much of the 
indifference of our young people is due to the care- 
less, indifferent, selfish lives of many professing 
Christians. Dear friends, let us, individually, look 
into this matter. Thousands of pious professions 
will not counterbalance the evil effects of one selfish 
act. I feel as if this were an evil calling for 
prayer and fasting, that the sin of selfishness may 
be cast out from among us. ‘To your tents, O 
Israel,* and tarry before the Lord until you know 
you have been given power to lead lives in which 
God can glorify Himself.” 

This afternoon, the minister who led the early 
morning service took charge of the young people’s 
general meeting. He spoke from the words, “What 
is that to thee? Follow thou me.” After saying 
that as he understood there were many unconverted 
young people present, he would address his remarks 
chiefly to them, he proceeded to explain the cir- 
cumstances under which the words of his text were 
spoken, and in the course of his remarks, when 
making applications, he said: “Among the various 
excuses you give for not becoming Christians, many. 


In Prime. 


163 


probably all of you, would say that you see so many 
inconsistencies among those who profess Christianity, 
that you decline making any attempt at leading a 
religious life. 

“We will not discuss the possibility of your being 
mistaken, — of your having misunderstood some 
really good people ; we will not consider the prob- 
ability of your changing your mind in the case of 
many of whom you complain, did you understand 
all the circumstances. Unfortunately, we must 
admit that too many professing Christians are 
unworthy of the name. We know, too, that the dis- 
position to cover up, or ignore the shortcomings of 
unworthy church members, is a great and crying evil 
of our times. Many say that we ought not to expose 
the faults of our church family, that it does more 
harm than good. Were these faults not known by 
non-Christians there might be some reason in the 
argument. As it is, I do not agree with them. We 
cannot expose what is already known, and every 
professing Christian is, with occasional exceptions, 
generally understood by his unconverted acquaint- 
ances. On the other hand,# by ignoring such wrong- 
doing we apparently give our approval of such 
awful practices; we also cause suspicion to rest 
upon good people, whereby the unconverted may be 
led to misjudge them, thus adding to the evil 
already existing. 

“It seems to me wiser to acknowledge the fact 
that such people are not true Christians, and per- 
sonally to protest against their recognition as such 
by allowing them to remain in the church. 

“But, laying all these considerations aside for the 


164 


In Prime. 


present, let us assume that Christian people generally 
are as bad as some claim they are. Does all this 
lessen the sin of your refusing to be friends of the 
Savior who offers to give you the best things in 
heaven and earth? But you do not believe in the 
Savior? And why not? Because you have seen so 
many pretenders? It would surprise me, if, in so 
intelligent a congregation of young people, one 
would permit himself to give such an illogical answer 
as that ! I do not believe there is one person here 
who never knew a Christian who led a life consistent 
with his profession. One such life proves the 
possibility and truth of Christian experience, and 
renders you as responsible as if the rest of the world 
were all true Christians.” 

At the close the speaker exhorted the Christian 
young people to pray for help to testify by their 
lives, as well as their words, to Christ’s power to 
save from sin. He also warned them against habits 
of carelessness, which after a time would lead to 
unfaithfulness; he believed that many who are now 
dishonoring the Lord by their inconsistent lives, 
(unless they had deliberately chosen a life of 
hypocrisy,) were probably as earnest when they 
began, as any young person present; but by yielding 
to little temptations at first, they finally became a 
dishonor to the church, and a stumbling block to the 
unconverted. He also admonished them not to be 
influenced by Christians who excused and tried to 
cover the sins of false professors, but to be outspoken 
in condemning the same ; otherwise, they themselves 
would become partakers in their transgressions. 


CHAPTER XIII. 


In these days I began to realize that, instead of 
being taught by me, Julia was becoming my teacher. 
As the years have gone by this has become more 
and more apparent. 

On her return from camp-meeting, Julia wrote me 
that she had committed herself and all her interests 
into the hands of the Lord, and He had given her 
great peace; her not understanding the simplicity 
of the terms on which Christ saves us, was what had 
hindered her finding this peace some time before. 
However, she was as yet undecided as to how she 
was to manifest outwardly the spiritual change of 
which she was conscious. The earnestness and 
enthusiasm of the Methodist people whom she knew, 
inclined her to identify herself with them. But she 
was not sure that the rules of that church did not 
exact more than was required by the teaching of 
the Bible, and she would not join a church whose 
rules she could not promise to obey. 

While Julia was at camp-meeting drinking in 
divine truth, Mr. Cooper was making important 
plans and arranging to carry them out. His son 
Albert, a young man about twenty-two years old, 
had just finished his course at the academy, and his 
father wished him to study law. As yet he had 
borne no responsibility, and felt no ambition to 
accomplish or acquire more than was connected 
with his daily amusements. Hitherto his father 

X65 


In Pritno. 


1 66 


had regarded and treated him as a boy; conse- 
quently his rather slow nature had not awakened to 
matters that interest men ; he had given little atten- 
tion to anything beyond the sports and exercises of 
his school life. When at home he spent most of his 
time with the dogs and horses, and in hunting. 

As Mr. Cooper was reserved in the presence of 
his family, he and Albert had never come to the 
mutual understanding usual between father and son. 
Albert was, therefore, somewhat surprised when 
his father, on his return from Sunset Park, called 
him to the study and began giving him a detailed 
account of the history and fortunes of the Clayton 
family. He told him of his late visit and remarked : 
“I saw at once that Yates had made a mistake, and 
that he entirely misunderstood the girl. In as easy 
a way as possible, I changed the appearance of our 
motives in coming, and made it obvious that I did 
not know the family history, and consequently had 
not understood the situation. I have now another 
plan which I wish you to carry out. * ' 

“I?’* 

“Yes; I want you to familiarize yourself with the 
Clayton business affairs, and then go to Sunset 
Park, ostensibly to settle the matter of your Aunt 
Clayton’s dowry; but really to get acquainted with 
Miss Seymour. She has seen few young gentlemen ; 
if you are careful and succeed in making a good 
impression, there is no reason why you should not, 
in a short time, marry her. When in possession of 
her fortune you will be the richest man in the 
country. ’’ 

For several minutes young Cooper stared at his 


In Primo. 


167 


father, his face very red and his hands thrust into 
his pockets. At last he ejaculated: 

“But I do not want to get married!” 

“Neither do I want you to, but, as you see, if you 
secure the money you must marry Miss Seymour, 
and if you do this at all you must do it at once.” 

“I thought you wished me to read law.” 

“Certainly; the more property you have, the 
greater the necessity for your having a thorough 
knowledge of law. Your marriage need not interfere 
with your plans in the least; you will go on just the 
same as before.” 

“With all that property to look after there will be 
time for nothing else; I prefer a more free and 
easy life. ’ ’ 

“Oh, so far as that is concerned, Yates and I will 
look after your interests as we alwa57's have done, 
until you are ready to settle down. You are too 
inexperienced to undertake that sort of thing yet. ” 

“Perhaps the young lady does not care any more 
for marrying than I do.” 

“A young fellow like you may rely upon himself 
to persuade a girl to marry him. ’ ’ 

“I do not know, in the least, how to go about it, 
and think I shall not be able to manage it. I 
have not thought of marrying for years yet. ’ ’ 

“All you will have to do, after settling affairs, 
will be to agree with Miss Seymour in her wishes and 
opinions, and to be very attentive and entertaining.” 

“But after I marry Miss Seymour what shall I do 
with her? Who wants to be tied to a wife? There 
would be no more hunting, yachting, or having a 
good time.” 


i68 


In Primo. 


“Have no fears, — we will manage all that. I tell 
you she is a very pretty girl ; if you want a hand- 
some wife, this is the best chance you will ever 
have. * * 

“I do not want a wife at all.*’ 

' “Well, I have told you what is best to be done. I 
shall expect my directions to be followed. ’ ’ 

“Very well, sir, but I am not likely to succeed.” 

This father, who realized how incapable his son 
was of undertaking large business enterprises, with 
the natural partiality of parents, never doubted his 
being able to please so bright a girl as he had per- 
ceived Julia to be. It never occurred to him that 
his untrained, somewhat awkward son, was hardly a 
suitable companion for one so cultured and refined 
as Julia Seymour. 

So it happened that one afternoon in September, 
Mr. Albert Cooper called at Sunset Park. Julia 
received the blundering, embarrassed young man, 
with wonder and trepidation, but her doubtful 
manner soon changed to a cordiality that put him 
more at his ease. Her quick sympathy with any sort 
of distress compelled her to put forth an effort to 
relieve her disconcerted visitor. Albert, in his 
gratitude for her kindness, thought he never saw so 
beautiful a girl as Julia, in her dainty blue muslin 
and white ribbons. 

Unaccustomed to business interviews, Albert did 
not know how to introduce his subject; at last he 
began : 

“Miss Seymour, I have called to see about the 
dowry of my aunt, Mrs. Clayton. ’ * 

“As I have placed the entire matter in the hands 


Ill Primo. 


169 


of my lawyer, Mr. Thurston, for settlement, I must 
refer you to him. ’ ' 

‘ ‘ My father gave me these accounts and statements 
to show you, and told me to get the amount these 
papers call for. ’ ’ 

“You can place them before Mr. Thurston and he 
will tell you what to do with them.” 

“Miss Seymour, the fact is, I do not understand 
this business. Except to spend the allowance my 
father has given me for the last three years, I never 
have had anything to do with money matters. My 
father told me to arrange this in a certain way, and 
you say it must be done in another way. I do not 
know what to do. “ 

Appreciating the boyish frankness of her guest, 
and seeing that Albert was apprehensive of what 
his father would think of his management, Julia 
followed her inclination to assist him as she would 
have helped a troubled child. 

“I can sympathize with you, Mr. Cooper, for when 
I came to Sunset Park a few months ago, I was quite 
ignorant of everything outside of school life. I 
found myself placed at an especial disadvantage 
because I did not understand business matters. So 
I have studied harder than I ever did in my life 
before. ’’ 

“You do not seem to be getting much fun out of 
your money. Most girls would go in for a good 
time. ’ ’ 

“I do not know how that may be, but if I manage 
this property in a Christian way, I must understand 
these things. ' Mr. Thurston has helped me a great 
deal by pointing out such passages in my law books 


170 


In Prime. 


as I need to consider. These I have studied care- 
fully, and I think I understand pretty well the points 
that apply to Mrs. Clayton’s dowry. If you will 
come to the library I will explain the matter as best 
I can.” 

In great astonishment Albert followed Julia to the 
tastefully furnished library, which had undergone a 
great change during the last few months. All the 
moldy old books for which she had no immediate 
use, were placed in cupboards having handsomely 
paneled doors. Many of the shelves with glass doors 
were still empty. But it was entertaining to look 
over the titles of the new books which had been 
recently placed in some of the cases. There was a 
full line of classical poetry and standard fiction ; here 
was a case full of theological works; in this were 
Ruskin and Emerson’s writings; while in another 
case was to be found the best that had been written on 
philosophy and metaphysics ; near by was a fine col- 
lection of physiological and anatomical works; then, 
an array of choice histories and biographies ; there 
were also a few new scientific works and a number 
of miscellaneous books; the much prized volumes 
of law, and a generous supply of reference books 
completed the present acquisition. 

A thoughtful stranger would have wondered how 
a girl came to make such selections. Soon after 
her arrival at Sunset Park Julia had drawn upon 
Mrs. Rodgers, Mrs. Howard, Mr. Brooks and my- 
self for lists of books. Mr. Thurston seemed par- 
ticularly to enjoy making up and discussing such 
inventories; even Mr. Markham was put under con- 
tribution. Besides, Julia soon learned to read care- 


In Prime. 


fully such book notices as appeared in her 
magazines and papers, thus adding to previous 
selections. 

It was in this room that young Mr. Cooper found 
himself, and in a few minutes the ponderous tomes 
were before him, and Julia was explaining and prov- 
ing that he had no legal right whatever to Mrs. Clay- 
ton’s property. 

“Nevertheless,” she continued, “I do not want 
any money that may have come from your family, 
and have instructed Mr. Thurston to ascertain the 
amount of Mrs. Clayton’s dowry, with the legal rate 
of interest since it came into Mr. Clayton’s hands, 
and pay it to your family.” 

Albert moved uneasily in his chair, and at last 
broke out: 

“You are the queerest girl I ever saw! My sisters 
never read such books as these ; all they care for is 
an exciting novel, which they will sit up half the 
night to finish. Do you really like to read such 
books?” 

“Why, don’t you see, unless I inform myself, I 
never shall know how to manage my affairs? I must 
read and study, whether I like it or not. However, 
I can candidly say I do enjoy it most thoroughly.” 

“Well, so long as they have plenty of money to 
spend as they please, I don’t believe Belle or Kate 
would trouble themselves about where or how it was 
obtained. ” 

“But you know, we have to be careful about the 
use of money, or it will do ourselves and others a 
great deal of harm ; it is a great power either for 
good or evil.” 


172 


In Primo. 


“I have never thought much about these things. 
Father always looks after everything, and all we 
know is, that he lectures us when we spend too 
much.*' 

“I do not know how it would be if I had parents 
to look after things. Probably I should not feel as 
I do now, and perhaps I would take less interest. 
Still, I think I should want to know for the sake of 
knowing. I would like to understand what is going 
on in the world and how people do things.” 

“Do you like to read history? There is so much 
here.” 

“Yes, but as I know more of history than of 
almost anything else, I shall read other subjects 
first. ’ * 

Albert then intimating his intention of leaving, 
Julia asked: 

“How long do you intend remaining in the place?” 

“Oh, I am from town for a week, but do not know 
how long I shall be here.” 

“If you would like to look over these books, please 
feel free to do so ; or if you would like to take a look 
at the country, there is a pretty good saddle horse 
in the stable which you are welcome to use. Then, 
if convenient, I shall be glad to have you take dinner 
with me to-morrow evening.” 

The next morning Albert was back at Sunset Park. 
Julia left him in the library taking down and putting 
up books. On returning she found him in a brown 
study, and to her inquiry as to whether he had 
enjoyed the books, he rejoined: 

“I don't understand it at all! Yesterday you 
showed me that we have no legal right to my aunt’s 


In PrimO. 


i73 


dowry, — that we could not compel you to pay it. 
Yet you say you are going to return it with interest. 
Why do you do that? I am sure we would not have 
done so.” 

“That seems a strange question. If for no other 
reason, do you suppose my self-respect and sense 
of honor would allow me to keep money that came 
from your family? But aside from this, I have 
decided to lead an earnest Christian life. I could 
not do this, and retain money that came from people 
who would not willingly have given it to me. A 
Christian must be morally as well as legally 
honest.” 

“My parents and sisters call themselves Christians, 
I suppose, but they believe one should keep all he 
can get. In such a matter I am sure they would 
act differently from you. I know that once when 
Belle had spent all her allowance and did not wish 
father to know it, she coaxed me to lend her part of 
mine. At first she made excuses that she could not 
spare the money to pay me ; finally she only laughed 
when I asked her for it. She vexed me so, that to 
pay her off I told father about it, which frightened 
her very much, as she expected he would take it 
from her next quarter’s allowance, and she was 
badly in debt. But father only said that it would 
teach me to be sharper about trusting people.” 

Just then Miss Case arrived. She had come to 
stay with Julia until Monday morning. After the 
introduction and some conversation in which Albert 
took little part, they were called to luncheon, to 
which Julia had invited him to remain. 

Some casual remarks about camp-meeting turned 


^74 


In Primo. 


the conversation upon religious subjects. Miss Case, 
who had admitted that she could no longer doubt 
the truth of Christianity, and was earnestly endeavor- 
ing to follow her convictions, incidentally remarked: 

“It is not so easy to keep the Golden Rule as a 
mere critic might suppose. I used to say I was as 
good as any Christian, and a great deal better than 
many of them. I now know that I was not as good 
as any true Christian, much less being better. ’ ’ 
“What do you mean by the Golden Rule?” 
inquired Albert. 

“To illustrate, take this example. A young girl 
who is attending school, boards where I do. Really, 
she never seems to have even a wrong thought, but 
she knows very little, — will never know much more. 
She has taken a great fancy to me and frequently 
comes to my room. She cannot talk, knows nothing 
to talk about. I feel that I ought to be kind and 
polite to her; but to any remark I make she simply 
smiles and replies ‘Yes’ or ‘No.’ For the last 
week she has thus spent two hours with me every 
evening, and I am beginning to feel that I cannot 
endure it. Yet, if I were a young girl, among 
strangers, lonesome and homesick, I should want 
some one to be kind to me, and so I try to act 
accordingly. Before I became a Christian, I would 
have taken a book and read, leaving her to sit there 
until she chose to go away. In other words, the 
Golden Rule simply means doing by others as you 
wish them to do by you. ’ ’ 

“Do you think any one does that?’’ 

“Oh, yes. Miss Seymour does.’’ 

“Miss Case! I have had so little opportunity to 


In Prime. 


^75 


do good to any one, you do not know whether that 
is true or not.” 

“Well, is it not true of Mrs. Rodgers?” 

“I do not know what Mrs. Rodgers would say to 
that question, but from what I have been able to 
learn of her life, she is the exemplification of the 
Golden Rule.” 

“I hope,” said Albert, “that I may have the 
pleasure of meeting this Mrs. Rodgers.” 

“You may, for she will be home to dinner,” 
returned Julia. 


CHAPTER XIV. 


During Miss Case’s visit Albert was in the com- 
pany of the young ladies a great deal, visiting at the 
home, taking drives, attending a lawn party given 
in honor of Miss Case, and accompanying them to 
church, not omitting even the class-meeting. His 
amazement increased with every day of his 
acquaintance with Julia and her friends. When the 
time came for him to return to his home, as he bade 
good-bye, he said: 

“Miss Seymour, I have learned a great deal since 
coming here, and have quite new ideas as to what 
it is to be an honest man ; I have also a different 
view of Christianity. The people I know who 
belong to the church, do not make their religion a 
part of their lives as you do ; I did not know that 
any one did that. I supposed they belonged to the 
church because it was the proper thing to do. 

“I am going home to work — to try to make the 
best of myself. My father will be displeased, but I 
have made up my mind that I will be an honest 
business man, in whose dealings, as you express it, 
there can be nothing that could be pronounced 
illegal in either moral or civil courts. ’ ’ 

Probably the young man had never made so long 
a speech before in his life. His face and neck looked 
so red and swollen that he seemed almost choking. 
Julia replied : 

“I am so glad, and hope that you also intend to be 
an earnest Christian.” 


176 


In Prime. 


177 


“Oh, I am all mixed up about that. I say, do 
you know, I have done nothing my father sent me 
here to do ; there will be a fine row when I get home. 
Miss Seymour, although I am a year older than 
you, you are much wiser and know a great deal 
more than 1. If you would be my friend and think 
of me as a big, awkward boy who needs teaching, it 
would do me a lot of good.” 

“Certainly, you shall be my brother, and I will 
scold and lecture you in a real sisterly way.” 

“Well then, I shall go home, think about it all, and 
before I begin my law studies I'll come down and 
talk everything over with you, and you shall scold 
me as much as you please. ’ ’ 

This was the first time in Julia’s life that any one 
had appealed to her for help in this way. 
Inexperienced though she was, she realized that this 
young man’s hitherto dormant nature was awaken- 
ing, and that much depended upon the help given 
him at this critical time ; he could choose the right 
or wrong with equal ease. 

Julia would have been much more concerned had 
she known how little he had been taught of the 
difference between right and wrong; that it was 
only because Albert was, as yet, so much of a child, 
— a child, too, who developed slowly — that with his 
abundant opportunity, he was not already hardened 
in wickedness; had she known of the father’s plans 
for his son’s future, she would have felt she could do 
but little to help him; but Julia would have been 
discouraged had she known his mother, whom he 
resembled somewhat in character. Never having 
been roused to self-sacrifice, she had grown into a 


178 


In Primo. 


selfish, careless, ease-loving, rather stupid woman. 
Certainly, Julia would have regarded Albert’s case 
as hopeless had she known his sisters, who had 
inherited their mother’s selfishness, low ideals and 
indifference, and their father’s intellect, as well as 
his inclination to take every advantage possible of 
those with whom he dealt ; to all of this, the young 
ladies added a certain amount of vanity, with a love 
of display, which was peculiarly their own. 

As Albert traveled homeward, he slowly turned 
over in his mind what would be the situation when 
he should present himself to his father. He could 
plan no course, formulate no statement, by which to 
make known his new ideas. When he reached 
home he did not announce his arrival, but went 
straight to his room, and without even removing his 
boots, threw himself upon the bed and slept heavily 
until the luncheon bell rang. 

When Albert roused himself and went down to the 
dining-room, he found the family already seated at 
the table. His father looked at him sharply, asked 
a few commonplace questions and relapsed into 
silence. His mother, without speaking and, as it 
seemed, reluctantly, took the trouble to pour him a 
cup of tea. Belle’s first remark, as he shuffled his 
knife, fork and spoon about, was: 

“Well, I see you are clumsy as ever.’’ 

Kate chimed in with, “Yes, your absence was 
quite a relief. The Seytons were here two days, 
and I was thankful to be spared the mortification of 
having to introduce such an uncouth youth as a 
member of the family. ’ ’ 

“Lucky for me, ’’growled Albert. “I suppose your 


In Primo. 


179 


English colonel was as dull and stiff as usual. ‘Aw, 
weally!’ is all he knows enough to say. I 
always want to thump him on the back or trip him 
up. ” 

“Yes, you have such elegant tastes and manners.” 

“Oh, do be quiet!” interrupted Mrs. Cooper. “I 
dread to have you children all at home, you make 
such a tumult.” 

“Get your girls married off as quick as you can, 
mother, and then perhaps we can get along.” 

“Yes,” retorted Kate, “then you can keep your 
dogs in the drawing-room, and have all the dirt and 
litter in the house that even you can desire.” 

“Humph!” was Albert's only reply. 

Then the girls began an altercation between 
themselves over their plans for the afternoon. 

Luncheon finished, Mr. Cooper asked Albert to 
follow him to his study, and when there inquired in 
a brisk way : 

“Well, sir, how did you get along?” 

“Oh, Miss Seymour is not such a muff as to want 
to marry me.” 

“You did not ask her to marry you yet!” 

“No, sir, I was not quite dunce enough to do that. 
I do not want to marry her, and if I did, she has 
too much sense to have me.” 

“Well, what about the money? Did you settle 
that business?” 

“Father, I can’t think what you meant by send- 
ing me on such a fool’s errand. When I pulled out 
that envelope of papers you gave me. Miss Seymour 
walked me into the library, opened her law books 
and proved that we have not the shadow of a legal 


i8o 


In Prime. 


claim to the money. Then she told me that she 
considered we have, what she called a moral right to 
the money, and that she had directed her lawyer to 
find out how much Mrs. Clayton had received, and 
pay us that amount with interest. Miss Seymour 
said she had told all this to you. Why did you send 
me there?” 

“I thought if you were the sharp young fellow you 
ought to be, you would soon convince the young 
lady that she owed us a large sum of money, and 
would probably get more than I could. Were either 
of your sisters in your place I am sure they could 
have done so. At the same time, I was pretty sure 
that if you tried, you could marry one of the richest 
women in the country. ’ ’ 

“Well, Miss Seymour is a great deal brighter than 
you suppose, and I am not such a conceited puppy as 
to think I could do anything of the sort. ’ ’ 

“What did you do?” 

“Nothing, but learn more in a week than I ever 
knew before in my life. I have made up my mind 
to be a decent man, something I never thought of 
before.” 

“Well, how are you going about it?” 

“In the first place I am going to study law with 
all my might. When that is finished. I’ll look about 
to see what next. ’ ’ 

“That is all right. In the meantime you can 
keep up your acquaintance with Miss Seymour, and 
when the time comes she will marry you.” 

“As far as that is concerned, I may as well tell 
you that will never be. I do intend to keep up my 
acquaintance with Miss Seymour, but she would not 


In Primo. 


i8i 


marry such an ignoramus as I, even if I wanted her, 
which I do not. Just compare her with Belle or 
Kate! She knows more now than they will ever 
know, — or our whole family for that matter. If I 
were thinking of getting married. I’d rather have 
that black-eyed Miss Case I met at Miss Seymour’s; 
she would just suit me.” 

“Who is Miss Case?” 

“Oh, a sharp, handsome school teacher who was 
visiting Miss Seymour. ’ ’ 

By this time Albert seemed to be overwhelmed with 
his own boldness, and further utterance just then 
was impossible. His father stared at his crimson 
face and bulging eyes for some minutes, apparently 
at a loss to understand him. At last, speaking very 
slowly, he said: 

“I am not just sure what you mean, but I want 
you distinctly to understand that you cannot marry 
a poor girl. What would your sisters think if you 
brought such a wife here?” 

‘ ‘ I wonder more what Miss Case would say if she 
saw them. I doubt if she would touch them with 
the tip of her dainty boot. But you need not con- 
cern yourself, sir ; Miss Case is too much of a lady 
to marry me, or to own my sisters as connections. 
I only said if I were going to marry, I would want 
Miss Case. As she would not have me, I shall never 
marry any one. ’ ' 

“Be all this as it may, let me hear of no more 
intimacy with Miss Case. I desire you to keep up 
an acquaintance with Miss Seymour, and to carry 
on your law studies as you intimate you intend 
doing.” 


i 82 


In Primo. 


Understanding that the interview was over, 
Albert left the room. As he passed out, he noticed 
a peculiar smile on his father’s face that seemed to 
say, “I am quite sure of the outcome of my plans.” 
Albert was not so sure. 

And yet there had been a time in that father’s life 
when he was a different man. Those who had 
known Mr. Cooper in his earlier years, said that he 
was then both warm hearted and generous. But as 
he became more and more absorbed in business he 
became more hardened, all generous impulses were 
smothered, and he became known as a sharp dealer, 
unscrupulous as to the means he employed, so long 
as he was the gainer. His home life, where self- 
interest alone was considered, had helped to make 
him what he was. 


CHAPTER XV. 


Aug.—, i8— 

This afternoon a Sunday-school 
picnic was held in the grounds of Sunset Park, 
which proved to be a most enjoyable affair. Of 
course, all the children were there, and also the 
young people of the village and surrounding 
country, many of whom are much better informed 
on general topics than I had expected to find them. 
They have their literary and reading circles, and a 
number of them have attended some seminary or 
college, so that they are acquainted with the usages 
of good society. Their parents are sober, sensible, 
well read men and women, who greeted each other 
heartily. While the people were gathering they 
gravely discussed the weather, crops, house-keep- 
ing, politics and religion. 

When the exercises of singing, prayer and speak- 
ing were over, luncheon was arranged on a long 
table. As the picnic was for the children, they were 
placed at the table first, and served by the older 
people, who enjoyed their refreshment later while 
the children continued their interrupted games. 

After dinner the older people visited, while those 
younger amused themselves in various ways. Early 
in the afternoon, a young lady. Miss Ida Close, 
invited me to join a committee which had been 
ordered to complete the arrangement of a pro- 
gramme for an all-day temperance meeting, in which 
183 


In Prime. 


184 

all the Sunday-schools, literary and temperance 
societies were to join, and which was to be held a 
few weeks later. 

Miss Close introduced me to half a dozen young 
people, and we seated ourselves on the grass under 
a shady tree. After they had arranged their pro- 
gramme, we were joined by several others. In the 
course of conversation, a number of church-members 
were mentioned, who rarely contributed to the sup- 
port of the various church interests. 

“How is that?” I inquired. “I supposed that 
when people joined the church, they promised to 
give of their means for its support. Is it honest, 
then, for them not to do so? How would we regard 
people who thus failed to keep their promises 
in business matters? Is it not much more serious 
to break one’s promise to God and the church?” 

“That is all very well for you,” rejoined Jennie 
Miller. “I suppose it is very easy for you to give of 
your means when you have so much, and will never 
miss it ; but it is quite different with me. In the 
first place I have no means, for my father supports 
me. In the second place, my father’s salary as 
village postmaster is so small that it takes every 
cent of it to keep our large family. ’ ’ 

“I do not believe,” said Emma Johnston, “there 
is a church-member over twelve years old, who is 
well, but might contribute something, — at least only 
in very exceptional cases. Why do you not earn 
some money?” 

“How?” 

“I have joined the missionary society,” said Miss 
Close, “and cannot get a cent to pay my dues unless 


In Primo. 


185 


I earn it ; as my father is a blacksmith, we do not 
get rich very fast. So, in the spring I set a hen on 
thirteen eggs, and she hatched ten chickens. Father 
lent me money to buy the hen and eggs and to 
pay for grain to feed them until they are big enough 
to sell, when I must pay him back. Whatever I 
have left over and above expenses I shall give to 
the missionary society. It will not be much, but 
at least I shall have tried to do something.” 

“Well,” said Miss Susy Leonard, “I made a dress 
for Miss Goodrich and earned three dollars, which I 
paid towards church expenses. It was very little, 
— but better than nothing. ’ ’ 

“And yours,” I added, “was a real gift, one that 
has cost you something. That is what troubles me. 
I have not the satisfaction of working for what I 
give, nor the privilege of being obliged to deny 
myself anything in order to be able to give. It 
must be a real pleasure to give what has cost one 
something.” 

“But you too can sew?” 

“Yes, but that, you know, would not be a real 
benevolence for one in my position; it would be 
taking employment from dressmakers who need 
the work. Were I to raise chickens, the principle 
would be the same. In the case of Miss Close and 
Miss Leonard, theirs is a real benevolence, which 
adds to the benevolence treasury ; while in my case, 
nothing would be gained beyond the gratification of 
a sentiment, and possibly harm might be done.” 

“I never saw it in that light before. Thank you 
for helping us to realize our privileges,” replied 
Miss Close. 


In Primo. 


1 86 


“I tell yon,” cried Ella Smith, who is not a 
Christian, “if I were rich like yon, I’d not raise 
chickens, nor sew, nor bother myself abont anything ! 
I’d bny a new dress every day and bnild a honse an 
acre sqnare. Oh, I’d have a good time!” 

“Bnt that is not all that money is given ns for, and 
we are acconntable for the nse we make of it. Besides, 
I wonld rather make people happy and have many 
friends, than have all the dresses in the world. ’ ’ 

“Bnt do yon not think,” asked Harry Day, “that 
it helps poor working people when rich people 
spend their money in clothing, fine honses and 
expensive living generally? Is it not better to pro- 
vide work for people so they can earn their own 
living, than to let them become panpers to whom we 
mnst give alms?” 

“That is a qnestion I do not yet fnlly nnderstand. 
Bnt in my own case, I feel that the thing I can do 
now is to help those who can not work. When I learn 
what more I can do to assist people to help them- 
selves, and thns raise the moral standard of people 
generally, I shall be glad to do it. 

“Of one thing, however, I am certain. If rich 
people wonld give generonsly and systematically for 
the maintenance of the chnrch and its interests, and 
also for the relief of the destitnte, at the same time 
stndy to effect a change in the conditions that 
canse all this poverty and tronble, even if it lessened 
their immense bnsiness profits, — the snm of the 
snffering in the world wonld be rednced. 

“From what I can learn, few rich people are doing 
any of these things. Therefore, so long as the 
present state of affairs continnes, and there are so 


In Prime. 


187 


many helpless poor, I shall try to do as much good 
as I can in the best way I know. ’ ’ 

“If you wait for your fine dresses until all the 
poor people are made comfortable, you will never 
have them,” demurred Ella Smith. 

“That does not trouble me. If I can only do 
something helpful, as well as give what I shall not 
miss, I shall be satisfied.” 

A stranger who had joined us a few minutes pre- 
viously, followed with: — 

“I hope, for one thing, that you will avoid what 
seems to be a growing tendency on the part of rich 
people. For instance, sometimes when a president of 
a great corporation, or a rich manufacturer, gives a 
sum of sufficient amount to be published in the news- 
papers, he immediately increases the price of the prod- 
uct he controls, thus taking the amount of his gift 
from the consumer; or else he lowers the wages of 
his employes enough to refund the amount given. 
In either case he takes to himself credit for his 
generosity. ’ ’ 

“I do not understand how one can conscientiously 
do such a thing.” 

“Conscience has nothing to do with it. The man 
simply wants to pose as a philanthropist, and at the 
same time advertise himself and his business with- 
out any expense to himself. In the near future this 
will become so common, that public disgust will 
compel them to cease that sort of advertising,” and 
the stranger moved away. 

“There are great problems in the business 
world,” said Harold Day. “The cry is that the rich 
are growing richer and the poor are growing poorer ; 


1 88 


In Prime. 


— that capital is arrayed against labor, and the plea 
of the employes is not for alms, but for wages at 
living rates. It is the duty of all classes, rich and 
poor, to study these matters, not from standpoints 
of self-interest, but with a view to better all man- 
kind. ” 

“We are learning too,” said Jennie Miller, “that 
poor people are not the only ones who are puzzled 
as to how they shall manage their business affairs. ’ ’ 

“It seems to me. Miss Seymour,” added Mr. 
Norton, “that if you consider yourself as simply the 
Lord’s steward over your fortune, conducting your 
business and using your money as you think Christ 
Himself would do, it will require your best mental 
powers and occupy all your time. In that case you 
would be spending your whole life in direct and 
most active work for the Master.” 

“Thank you for that suggestion. It accords with 
a sermon I heard in New York, in which the clergy- 
man said that it is possible to glorify God in the 
conduct of business. Hov/ever, I do not quite see 
what I can do in that way; but if I ‘do all for Jesus,’ 
— then attending to rents and contracts is service 
rendered to Christ. This opens to me a wide door. 
But you see, I do not know just how to begin, nor 
what is the right course for me to pursue. There 
is so much to do. In the first place, I need to sup- 
plement my education by doing a great deal of sys- 
tematic reading; besides this it will take a long time 
to understand my business affairs so I can conduct 
them in such a way as will most benefit the largest 
number of people. And then they tell me I owe a 
duty to society. What I have heard, seen and read, 


In Primo. 


189 


has aroused my curiosity to see what fashionable life 
is like, and to learn my duty in that direction. Most 
of all, I am unsettled about some religious matters ; 
people have such different ideas of what God 
requires of us ; it seems as though it would take a 
lifetime to understand the Bible and know just what 
is right.” 

Oscar Jones remarked: '‘Truly, if one looks at it 
in the right way, yours is a formidable undertaking, 
and being rich means a great deal more than having 
plenty of money to spend on having a good time.” 

“I find it so, and since I have so vague an idea of 
what my duties are, I am glad whenever I hear 
anything in this connection definitely explained, as 
Mr. Norton has done.” 

I then spoke of the sermon I had heard in New 
York on the subject of Christian giving. Oscar 
Jones asked in great surprise : 

“Do you mean to say. Miss Seymour, that the 
minister thought people ought to give a tenth of 
their income towards the support of the church?” 

“Yes, towards the support of the church and its 
interests, — and he proved it from the Bible.” 

“Some people prove a great deal from the Bible. 
I do not believe it is our duty to give more than we 
can afford.” 

“Do you not think we can always afford what the 
Lord requires?” inquired Mr. Norton. 

“But I do not believe that, under the New 
Testament dispensation, we are required to give one 
tenth of our income.” 

“But,” continued Mr. Norton, “what is the 
ground of your belief? I often hear people say. 


190 


In Primo. 


‘This is right and that is wrong,’ or ‘I believe this 
or that, ’ as if that settled the matter for all time and 
for everybody. Now, on a question of this sort, 
ought we not to look for higher authority than 
simply our own belief or feeling? 

“I think, Mr. Jones, the best way to satisfy your- 
self on this point, will be to study the subject in the 
Old and New Testaments, finding how far they 
agree, and corroborate each other, in the matter of 
keeping the moral law and living holy lives.” 

“That is a large undertaking.” 

“True, but he who resolves to follow the teachings 
of Christ has a large undertaking on hand, and to 
succeed he must put forth his best effort, humbly 
depending on his Savior for help. In dealing with 
such important matters as deciding what Christ 
teaches concerning our duty, it does not seem con- 
sistent with Christian faithfulness to excuse our- 
selves by simply saying, ‘I do not believe Christ 
teaches this, ’ insead of ascertaining the truth at any 
cost.” 

“I stand reproved, and will study the subject as 
you suggest; if I find this to be the teaching of 
Christ, I’ll follow it.” 

“But,” asked Mr. Day, “was not paying tithes a 
Mosaic and ritualistic law? Are we bound by that 
law now?” 

“It was not a part of the ceremonial law, but of 
the moral law. That you must admit is still 
binding.” 

“Yes,” said I, “in the sermon to which I referred, 
the minister read from the Bible, proving that 
Abraham paid tithes hundreds of years before the 


In Primo. 


191 


ceremonial law was given. Jacob also paid tithes. 
Twenty years before God gave the law providing 
that the Levites should be supported from these 
tithes, He said to Moses, ‘The tithe is the Lord’s;’ 
and this was long before the ritual was given. 
Moreover, history teaches us that the early church 
taught the duty of paying tithes. ’ ’ 

“Well, you have greatly interested me in the sub- 
ject, and I shall certainly study it thoroughly. 

“For the present let us suppose this a duty. In 
the first place, I do not see how a farmer is going to 
know how much is a tenth of his income ; in the 
second place, I do not see how a farmer can afford 
to pay one tenth of his income. He makes so little 
from year to year.’’ 

“I am now teaching,’’ explained Mr. Norton, “so 
at present, tithing my income is a very simple 
matter. I have only to deduct one tenth from my 
salary as I receive it from month to month. But 
when on the farm, I found that if during the year a 
farmer keeps a careful account of all business out- 
lays, and deducts the same from his entire income, 
a tenth of the remainder is the Bible requirement.” 

“But what do you call business outlays? Would 
you include living expenses?’’ 

“I do not see that a farmer should deduct his 
living expenses from his income, any more than I 
should deduct mine from my salary.” 

“But most farmers board their hired men, and 
because of this, also have the expense of hired help 
in the house. How would you arrange that?” 

“That is not a difficult problem. The farmer 
must keep an account of the amount and value of 


192 


In Prinio. 


supplies used; then by calculating the cost of board 
per capita, he can find the outlay for hired help.’* 

“That,” objected Mr. Day, “is more trouble than 
most farmers will take the time to attend to.” 

“It is just what every farmer must do if he 
achieve the highest possible success with his business. 
I have no doubt that farmers would be many dollars 
richer every year, if they would thus undertake to 
tithe their income, for they would thus conduct 
their affairs in a more business-like manner. Lay- 
ing duty aside, it would be the most profitable way 
to farm. ’ 

“That is a new way of looking at it.” 

“Yes,” said Lois Reed, a Sunday-school teacher, 
“that is always the way with the Lord’s commands. 
‘In keeping of them is great reward;’ spiritually and 
temporally. To be sure, it is a poor Christian who 
would keep them only for the sake of temporal gain ; 
but if he had no higher motive, he would have his 
reward. ’ ’ 

“Do you think the rule would hold good in all 
departments of business?” 

“Certainly, whatever leads a man to make more 
careful, conscientious business calculations must 
help him to be a wise business man.” 

“But generally the one who drives the sharpest 
bargains, and looks out for number one, is the man 
who makes the most money,” said Oscar Jones. 

“I thought,” interrupted Jennie Miller, “we were 
talking about the best way for Christian people to 
conduct business. I hope we are not to compare 
ourselves with rogues and dishonest men. Of course, 
we cannot compete with men who improve their 


In Primo. 


193 


opportunities to steal thousands of dollars, directly 
or indirectly; though, even in their case, the sequel 
usually proves that ‘The way of the transgressor is 
hard/ ’’ 

“From your remarks, Miss Seymour,” said Mr. 
Norton, “I judge you are convinced of the Chris- 
tian’s obligation to pay one tenth of his income.” 

“Yes, and as soon as I can find out what one tenth 
of my income is, I shall gladly obey the law.” 

“It seems to me that Miss Close and Miss 
Leonard, instead of only giving one tenth, have 
given all their income. What more could be 
required? Of course, when we hear of the great 
need in the world, we long to give more ; but as a 
simple matter of keeping God’s commandments, 
they have abounded in good works, since the tenth 
is what we owe, and all more than that comes under 
the head of a ‘free will offering,’ ” was Mr. Nortons* 
reply. 

“This opens another door for me,” said I, “for 
since I need not restrict myself to simply paying 
one tenth, it is my privilege to abound in good 
works by giving, as a ‘free will offering,’ as much as 
will not interfere with my regular income and thus 
prevent a continuance of such gifts.” 

“I have often thought,” returned Mr. Norton, 
“that since a tenth is what is required of all 
Christians, rich people who are disposed to carry out 
the spirit, as well as the letter of the law, would 
want to give many times one tenth.” 

At this point we were called to the stand to assist 
with some music, so the discussion closed. 

“The people do not seem to hold themselves so 


194 


In Prime. 


aloof from me as they did at the picnic last Fourth 
of July,’* I remarked to Ida Close, to which she 
replied : 

“Why, don’t you understand that? How did we 
know but that you would repel our advances? 
When the Clayton family and their friends came to 
spend a few weeks at Sunset Park in the summer, 
they ignored all the people here. Sometimes they 
came to our picnics, and walked about, looking 
curiously at us and our arrangements, often seem- 
ing much amused at our expense. Of course we 
never approached them socially or in any other 
way. ’ ’ 

I find I am not so timid about talking to people as 
I was a few months ago. When I realized how 
large a part I had taken in that discussion I was 
quite amazed. 

^ ^ 

Sept. — , 1 8 — . — 

I believe I am a Christian. I 
know I have given myself to the Lord, and since I 
belong to Him I must be saved. I am sure He will 
lead me on to become more and more like Himself, 
and to be like Jesus is the chief desire of my heart. 
How wonderfully life opens out before me! The 
more I learn the more I see of life’s privileges; but 
I also find an increasing number of problems. The 
question of amusements is still before me, and I am 
unable to understand why dancing, theaters, and 
many of these things are wrong. Those who 
object to them have given me no satisfactory reason 
for doing so. Most of their arguments, when 
brought down to the last analysis, are about the 


In Primo. 


195 


same as that of an elderly gentleman whom I heard 
speaking against dancing. Some one asked him why 
he objected to this particular amusement, and he 
answered : 

“I despise it and I always did.” 

“But why?” 

“I don’t know, but I despise it.’' 

This argument does not impress me as con- 
clusive. I have heard others say that a deeply 
spiritual Christian is never found in the ball room ; 
that participation in such amusements dims their 
religious experience and lessens their joy. But I 
do not understand why this should be so. Esther 
does not object to dancing, and I am sure she is an 
earnest, consistent Christian. I have prayed for 
light, but see no way to decide for myself unless I 
have some personal experience in the matter. To 
be sure, Mrs. Rodgers says that I will understand 
many things more clearly when I am older ; but 
that does not help me now, unless I simply follow 
the advice of those who condemn such amusements, 
or follow the example of those who approve of 
them. In either case I find myself in a dilemma; 
on the one hand, Mrs. Rodgers, and others, whose 
judgment seems good, disapprove of balls; on the 
other hand my mother and grandmother had no 
objection to them; neither have Esther and Mrs. 
Howard. It does seem to me that young people are 
capable of understanding more than older people give 
them credit for, and that it would be much better 
to explain things in general, in such a way that one 
could see the reasons for their objections. After 
much reflection, I have about decided to allow Mrs. 


196 


In Primo. 


Howard to make what she may consider suitable 
arrangements for me to spend a part of the winter 
in the city, that I may see something of fashionable 
life. 


CHAPTER XVI. 


Sept. — , 1 8 — . — 

Just as I had come to the above 
mentioned conclusion, Miss Ida Close came over to 
see if I would not attend the union temperance 
meeting, for which the final arrangements were 
made last week at the picnic. So, yesterday, we 

went with a large delegation by train to E ; 

where we were met by committees, and sent in 
carriages out to the grove where the meeting was 
held. All the meetings were good, but I was 
especially interested in the speech of Mr. Granby, 
a congressman from Massachusetts. He is a man 
of striking appearance, tall, broad shouldered, stand- 
ing so erect that he looks even taller than he is ; he 
has a high, broad forehead, large, intensely black 
eyes and dark, slightly curling hair. He seems to be 
a natural orator, having a fine gift of language, and 
a voice of remarkable melody, power and effect. 
Mr. Granby is very earnest as well as original, and 
most people pronounce his ideas extreme. How- 
ever, they are not likely to forget his address, in 
which he handled his subject in a masterly manner. 
His hearers may object to his arguments, but they 
cannot combat them. His interesting style and fine 
bearing make him a very attractive speaker. 

Hs * Sj< * * Hi JH 

Last evening, as a number of us were standing 
together, discussing the events of the day, Mr 
Granby and Mr. Day joined our group. Mr. Gran- 
197 


198 


In Primo. 


by quietly and easily turned the conversation, which 
was general, so that each one seemed, incidentally, to 
make some remark about the temperance sentiment 
of the people where he resided, and in the same 
way, before he left, each had expressed his or her 
personal views, except myself. Finally, Mr. 
Granby turned to me, saying: 

“And where is your home?” 

“At Hampton.” 

“Oh, you and Mr. Day are from the same place. 
Are you forming any new plans for interesting the 
people there?” 

“I am a stranger at Hampton, having been there 
only since last June. I hardly know what needs to 
be done or what should be my part in it.” 

“Oh, well, you will find plenty to do. I notice 
you sing well ; that is always a help, ’ ' and with that 
he passed on. 

Later in the evening we gathered about the 
organ at the stand. Mr. Granby has a reputation 
as a soloist as well as an orator, and in response to 
an invitation to sing, he asked if I would accompany 
him, which I did. His rich, wonderful voice rang 
out upon the air like a clarion call, seeming to sum- 
mon all the world to great and noble action. As his 
tones vibrated upon the air, one seemed to hear the 
marshaling of mighty hosts of crusaders, ready to 
march upon every rampart of evil, confident of 
victory and exulting in the foreseen triumph. 
There is such power, such an influence in music and 
song! I never so realized it before, — I begin to 
understand what people mean- when they talk of a 
consecrated voice. 


In Primo. 


199 


This morning, as I sat in front of the tent, Mr. 
Granby approached, lifted his hat, and said: 

“Miss Seymour, yesterday you seemed doubtful 
as to what you could do to help interest others in 
this cause. I understand you have great possessions 
in money and property ; that means great power for 
good.” 

I then told him something of my desires and per- 
plexities. 

“Yes,” he replied, “undoubtedly, there are many 
problems connected with making the right use of 
money. If I had it I would try to use it conscien- 
tiously. As it is, I am glad to be free to use all the 
time and strength at my disposal, in direct personal 
effort towards bringing about what seems to be 
greatly needed in the way of reforms. ’ ’ 

I then told him of how my time had thus far been 
taken up, and of my efforts to understand my duties 
in various directions, including the question of my 
duties and privileges in matters of benevolence; 
and that as yet I saw no prospect of bringing order 
out of the chaos. 

“And yesterday,” said I, “you brought more 
problems to be solved.” 

Referring to my being so fully occupied in attend- 
ing to business matters, and in considering my rela- 
tions and duties to those with whom I deal and 
those whom I employ, I expressed regret that, indi- 
vidually, I could take so little part in the hand to 
hand work in which Mr. Day and others were so 
busily engaged. 

“At the most,” said I, “I only can assist 
indirectly. ’ ’ 


200 


In Prinio. 


“I think I understand yon, and while others are 
probably envying you what appears to them your 
great opportunities for doing good, I offer you 
my sympathy because of the opportunities denied 
you. 

“There are also other difficulties in your way 
besides those you mention. There are many suffer- 
ing and destitute people who have not learned that 
there is a cause for their troubles, as well as for 
everything else ; that frequently they are themselves 
to blame for what they suffer; and that God is work- 
ing out great plans of which we, with our finite 
conceptions, can have little comprehension. They 
naturally look with more or less suspicion upon all 
who, as the}^ think, are so much more highly favored 
than themselves. Often they feel much bitterness 
towards the rich who are indifferent to the needs of 
those less fortunate than themselves; and they fail 
to distinguish between them, and those who sym- 
pathize with them in their distress and are seeking 
to help them. 

“Then too, it does seem as if the workers are 
mostly those who have nothing but themselves to 
give. Consequently, many of those whom they go 
to help, regard the good work of the city missionary 
as simply an employment, — and people whose own 
hearts are untouched by the love of Christ, are 
often perverse enough to refuse to understand that 
those who undertake this work must be supported, 
or they would be unable to do it. I have often 
thought of how much good it would do if rich 
people, who do not need support, would themselves 
engage more frequently in personal work, 


In Primo. 


201 


instead of contenting themselves with giving their 
money.” 

“But what can I do?” 

“Please allow me to mention something you can 
avoid doing. I was once present when a rich 
woman gave one dollar to a charitable cause, saying, 
‘This is a widow’s mite.’ The gentleman who was 
advocating the cause, turned sharply upon her with, — 

“ ‘A widow’s mite! Madam, do you know what 
that means? It means every dollar you have, even 
your living!’ 

“Really, Miss Seymour, I have heard rich people 
talk in that strain until I am disgusted. 

“I knew another rich woman who said, ‘Since I 
supply the money to carry out such a scheme, I 
expect to be excused from all further effort in the 
matter.’ ” 

“Yes,” I returned, “I have studied the Bible on 
this subject, and think I understand it.” 

“Then you have read the command, ‘Whatsoever 
thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might, ’ which 
throws some light upon the problem as to what 
you can do. You will find much to do in Hampton. 
I suppose, too, you expect to spend some time in 
New York?” 

“Yes, I have decided to spend a few months there 
next winter.” 

“I also expect to be there occasionally during 
December and January. If you will let me know 
of your arrival, I shall be glad to assist you in finding 
out what personal work you can do there. But I 
anticipate that your city friends will object to your 
thinking of anything outside of society matters. ’ ’ 


202 


In Prime. 


‘ ‘ I am going to the city with the express purpose 
of ascertaining what duties I owe to society. I 
shall be all the better prepared to judge of this if I 
can discover the relation of society to the needs of 
the world. Therefore, your kind offer, for which I 
sincerely thank you, is in line with my plans.” 

“Well, I shall be glad to meet you and to be of 
any service to you there, if your friends do not find 
a way to upset your plans.” 

“No, since this is a part of my purpose in visiting 
the city, I shall certainly carry it out.” 

* * * * He 

Oct. , 1 8 . 

One week ago yesterday I reached 
the large, home-like residence of Judge Harris, 

which is in the suburb of A . Judge Harris is a 

dignified but cordial gentleman, and his wife is a 
sweet, motherly woman. They have three sons. 
May being their only daughter. Since she was con- 
verted at camp-meeting, the entire family are now 
Christians. 

At Sunset Park I am accustomed to reading from 
the Prayer Book mornings, but I was never in a 
house before where family worship was conducted 
as it is there. After breakfast the household gathers 
in the parlor, each member bringing a Bible and 
hymn book. Judge Harris announces a hymn, 
which all join in singing, May playing the organ; 
then a chapter from the Bible is read a verse about; 
and Judge Harris offers prayer, in which he prays 
for each one present. In the evening, before 
retiring, a verse is sung, and the Judge calls on 


In Primo. 


203 


some one, his wife, one of his sons, perhaps May, 
or one of the servants, to pray. 

This seems to me a most beautiful custom and has 
helped me so much. Throughout the day the 
influence of these simple services seemed to go with 
me, constantly reminding me of God’s presence in 
this home, which is truly His temple. When I told 
Mrs. Rodgers about it, she said that in her home 
this custom existed, and I have decided that it will 
be helpful to have the same at Sunset. 

May’s brother Jack, who is three years older than 
herself, and Sam and Rob, who are younger, are 
intelligent, jolly boys, very gentlemanly, — not 
awkward and ill at ease, like poor Albert Cooper. 
Yet I cannot help wishing he were there for a 
while ; I am sure it would do him a great deal of 
good. 

I was greatly surprised to find Miss Isabelle 
Granby at the Harrises’. Although I liked her very 
much, I had little opportunity to make her 
acquaintance, as her brother came for her on Thurs- 
day, spending the day there and leaving in the even- 
ing. May met Miss Isabelle at boarding school. 
They form a great contrast in appearance, May 
being small and slight, with blue eyes, fair com- 
plexion and light hair; while Miss Isabelle, like her 
brother, is tall and dark, with refined features and 
expressive, large dark eyes. I am just a little afraid 
of her, although she is very friendly, good natured 
and full of fun. She is very dignified, wise, and so 
well informed, that while Judge Harris and others 
talked of many things of which I had never heard. 
Miss Isabelle seemed to know all about whatever 


204 


In Primo. 


was discussed. May says she was the brightest girl 
in school, and that the teachers were very proud of 
her. 

Mr. Granby, senior, is a well educated New 
England farmer, who comes of a good family. 
After he was graduated from college his health 
failed, and having inherited the old homestead which 
had belonged to three generations of well educated 
Granbys, he became a farmer. Mrs. Granby was 
the daughter of an Amherst professor. Isabelle has 
a sister, Alice, who is married to a Cincinnati 
physician, whom May describes as the sweetest, 
tiniest lady she ever saw, — beautiful as a blue-eyed 
fairy, — good as an angel, and as wise as her mother. 
May does go on so ! But I gather that this Alice is 
well worth seeing and knowing. There is also a 
gentle, brown-eyed brother Ernest, who, when he 
was two years old, had a fall which injured his spine 
and crippled him for life. When Isabelle mentions 
him, her eyes grow large and luminous, as if she 
feels so much more than even her tongue can 
express. When Mr. Granby speaks of Ernest his 
face and voice express unmeasured affection. It 
must be wonderful to be loved as these two love 
their brother. 

Mr. Howard Granby, after going through college, 
took an extensive law course, and is now noted in 
his profession. Judge Harris seems to attach much 
importance to his opinions. Mr. Granby has 
served a term in his state legislature, and is now a 
Representative in the Congress of the United 
States. He is also in demand as a lecturer, and has 
done effective service in the temperance work. 


in Primo. 


205 


Although Mr. Granby is so wise and famous, I am 
not in the least afraid of him. He is graver than 
his sister and even more dignified ; yet I find it easy 
to express my thoughts in his presence, and do not 
shrink from letting him know how ignorant I am. 

The afternoon the Granbys were at Judge Harris’, 
a number of people were in the drawing-room, 
and in reply to some remark, a young lady rather 
flippantly exclaimed : 

“Well, I see no harm in dancing, — at last for peo- 
ple who are not Christians.” 

“And why,” said another, “is it wrong for Chris- 
tians to do anything that it is not wrong for you to 
do? All people are commanded to obey the Lord. 
When you, or Christians, fail to do this, in either 
case it is disobedience, and disobedience to God is 
sin in one, as much as in the other. I do not speak of 
dancing especially, but of anything that is wrong. ’ ’ 

Then followed a discussion, the conclusion of 
which was that wrong is wrong, no matter by whom 
committed. In this connection it was also brought 
out that we are not only responsible for what we do 
know, but for what we ought to know. An elderly 
gentleman asked me if I thought it wrong to dance. 

“I have not yet been able,” I returned “to 
determine the question for myself, and cannot judge 
for others.” 

“Do you not consider it safe to accept the 
opinions of mature Christians? May seems satis- 
fied that her mother’s judgment in such matters 
is to be relied upon. Would it not be well to follow 
May’s example?” 

“If I had a mother like May’s, in matters where it 


2o6 


In Priino. 


was merely a question of indulging in some amuse- 
ment, I would certainly respect her opinions and 
accede to her wishes whether I saw a reason for it 
or not, so long as no principle was involved. That 
would be not only safe, but right. My mother died 
before I was ten years old. However, if I followed 
May’s example, I should decide that it is not wrong 
to dance, for my mother did not disapprove of it, 
and she was a Christian. As it is, so many good 
people differ in opinion on this subject, that 
situated as I am, I see no way for me but to think 
the matter out for myself.” 

A discussion of Puritan conduct followed, in the 
course of which Mr. Granby read as follows from a 
book he held in his hand : 

“ ‘New England never made provision for amuse- 
ments. Amusements have for ages, in Europe, 
been the bribe which government threw to the 
people for their political rights. Fiddles were 
cheaper than ballot boxes. Kings, formerly, 
would pay liberally to amuse, but nothing to 
instruct. The old Puritan, regarding games and 
amusements as poisonous flowers, whose odor 
bewitched the senses and stupefied manhood, 
abhorred them. It was not hatred of pleasure, but 
of the seductive purposes to which it had been 
seductively put. 

“ ‘It was the practical philosophy of New England 
that a free and intelligent people, thrifty in 
business, managing their own matters, and zealously 
occupied in building up the common wealth, had 
excitement enough, and variety of interest in their 
normal affairs, and that earnest men did not need, 


In Primo. 


207 


like children, to be fed on frolic and amusement/ ” 
— (Norwood, Beecher.) 

“In what follows,” remarked Mr. Granby, “the 
author, in expressing his own views, somewhat 
modifies what I have just read, but to my mind, 
these words, without qualifications, express the 
truth. 

“If we distinguish between helpful and harmful 
pleasure by considering the results of amuse- 
ments pursued for the sake of pleasure, we shall not 
often have occasion to regret indulgence in that 
which is blameworthy. To do this, we must some- 
times look deeper than simply to observe the 
tendency and result of what has gone on around us, 
during our own short lifetime, although very 
often we may, if we will, learn much from this. We 
must consider the uses to which an amusement has 
been easily adapted through many generations, and 
the result of the same, if we would determine the 
general tendency of its influence. 

“If we thus study dancing and the amusements 
usually associated with it, as we now see them, and 
as given in European history, how often shall we 
find the ball an occasion of intrigue, conspiracy and 
other wrong-doing ! For a very striking example of 
this we may turn to the massacre of St. Bartholo- 
mew’s night. How often, too, have dancing, 
gambling and drinking been the direct occasion of 
the overthrow of good causes in both peace and 
war!” 

This seemed to me like real argument against danc- 
ing ; real reason, — not simply feeling, — on the subject, 
or doing a thing because some one else does it. 


CHAPTER XVII. 


Oct. — , 1 8 — . — 

To-day I received an unexpected 
visit from Mr. Albert Cooper. He informed me that 
he stopped off at the village where Miss Case teaches, 
and called on her. When I told Mrs. Rodgers of 
this she replied : 

“I am not in the least surprised; moreover, if I 
am not much mistaken. Miss Case will prove to be 
not wholly indifferent to Mr. Cooper.” 

“Oh, Mrs. Rodgers, that is impossible!” 

“My dear, I am of the opinion that some day Mr. 
Cooper will astonish his friends. Natures like his 
awaken slowly, but he is capable of a great deal 
more than is manifest at present. Indeed, I rather 
like the young man, and think when his latent 
powers are developed he will prove a strong 
character. I am inclined to believe he will prove 
the sort of man who will form just the balance such 
a quick, active, nervous person as Miss Case will 
need to keep her from going to extremes. Just 
give the young man time to develop, and Miss Case 
time to understand and appreciate him, and you will 
see. ” 

I was dumb with astonishment and perhaps some 
indignation, — not indignant with Mrs. Rodgers, — 
but with the idea that such a thing as she suggested 
might even be possible, and after a few minutes 
came to my room to relieve myself by writing in my 
journal. 


30S 


In Primo. 


209 


Oct. — , 18 — . — 

Mr. Cooper has been over twice, 
and I have been trying to look at him through Mrs. 
Rodgers’ eyes. I knew, at the end of his first visit 
that he was struggling with new ideas of manliness, 
and rejoiced that mine had been the opportunity to 
show him some of the better possibilities of life. I 
hoped that in consequence of this he would be a 
better man than his father ; I thought him a very 
commonplace youth, who would probably spend his 
life making and taking care of money; he seemed to 
have very few ideas and to have been taught very 
few of the amenities of society, or to have been a 
very inapt pupil. On his two last visits I have studied 
him closely, and observe in him an earnestness that 
was not noticeable the first time I met him. This 
morning he told me that he intended to undertake 
a course of reading outside his law studies, and 
inquired what books would be best for him to begin 
with. 

A few days ago I received a letter from Miss 
Case, a part of which I shall now copy into my 
journal. 

“Brownsville, October 9th, 18 — . 

“My dear Miss Seymour: — ^ * 

By the way, last evening, to my surprise, Mr. 
Cooper called again. * h: * * * 

* * He said he was going to H . He surely 

seems a diamond in the rough. Although his 
appearance is not prepossessing, yet the frankness 
with which he expressed his regret at having 
acquired so little knowledge, with his blunt, but 
pathetic appeal to be ‘told how a fellow was going 


210 


In Prime. 


to set about being a man,’ quite moved me. I 
wonder if you and I cannot form a conspiracy to 
help him on a little. As the work of a public 
benefactor is more in your line than mine, you will 
probably have to do most of the helping ; but you 
may depend on me to do what I can. How would it 
be if you could contrive to smuggle him into the 
society of Judge Harris’ family? They would under- 
stand him so well, and would heartily sympathize 
with him in his new ambitions. 

“This finishes all the news I have to tell you, so I 
will close. 

“Yours, with much love, 

“MARGARET CASE.’ 

There now! I suppose Mrs. Rodgers will say, “I 
told you so;’’ but I will draw no hasty conclusions, 
and as far as I am able, will help Miss Case. If Mr. 
Cooper is a “diamond in the rough,” I shall consider 
it a privilege to help polish him. If he is to be any- 
thing to Miss Case I am especially anxious to do this ; 
in any case, if he does not marry her he will prob- 
ably marry some other woman, and if I can help to 
get him ready to make her happy I ought to do it. 
Life seems to be made up of many queer things of 
which I never dreamed. 

^ 4 : 4 : 

Oct. — , i8— . — 

I am arranging for an old-fashioned 
Thanksgiving at Sunset Park, to which the Harrises 
have promised to come; so I also invited Mr. 
Cooper. He seemed overwhelmingly delighted and 


In Primo. 


2II 


immediately asked if Miss Case would be here, too. 
I was happy to be able to assure him that I expected 
her, as well as several other young ladies. Besides 
Nellie Millburn and two of our friends, I had asked 
May Harris to bring three or four of her own and 
her brother’s friends. 

Well, I’ll have nothing to do with this prospective 
love affair; I am not even going to believe in its 
possibility, — and Margaret Case shall not have the 
remotest hint that such a thing has been thought of. 
I wish Mrs. Rodgers had not put it into my mind. 
If May Harris should get an inkling of it there 
would be no peace for any one, she is such a tease. 
She even managed to extract considerable fun out 
of an imaginary preference for me, on the part of 
Mr. Granby. If a real case were on hand, I would 
beg to be spared May’s artillery. 

I shall proceed on the principle that I ought to 
help every one to the extent of my ability, in just 
the way they most need help ; if money is needed I 
will give that ; if my influence can be used to lead any 
one to a better course, I will give that ; if I have had 
more favorable advantages, thereby obtaining 
superior knowledge, and feel that my advice or 
instruction is needed, it shall be freely given. 

I have heard Judge Harris say that if young ladies 
were thoughtful and desired to do good, there was a 
wide field of usefulness for them in the way of 
influencing young men aright. He thinks many 
young men could have been saved from ruin, if 
young ladies had taken the trouble to make them 
understand that a continuation in objectionable con- 
duct would forfeit the respect of their lady friends. 


212 


In Primo. 


Now, if I can arouse in Albert Cooper an ambition 
to be manly, and can throw around him the influence 
of such people as the Harrises, surely I shall have 
done a good work. One thing, however, troubles 
me ; he does not seem to have any religious 
tendencies. He listens respectfully when I speak 
of these things, but makes no response. Perhaps 
Miss Case will be more successful in awakening him 
to the advantages of a Christian life. 

Oct. — , 1 8 — . — 

I have told Mrs. Rodgers about 
my failure to interest Mr. Cooper religiously. She 
answered : 

“You are in too great a hurry to see the results 
of your efforts. Your are comparing this young man 
with the young people from Christian homes, whom 
you met at camp-meeting. But this boy has evi- 
dently had no earnest Christian acquaintances. In 
coming here he entered, as it were, a new world. 

“I have had little talks with Mr. Cooper, and think 
I understand something of his home life and past 
history. You are the first young lady who ever 
treated him as if he were not more of an annoyance 
than anything else. This, with a knowledge of your 
wealth and independent position, impressed him 
favorably ; your readiness to explain things led him 
to listen willingly; your ideas, to him startlingly 
new, pleased his impressionable nature. 

“You will find he has considerable selfishness. As 
yet, he has cared onl}^ for boyish sports ; beyond the 
sarcasms and ridicule of his sisters, he has, hitherto, 
encountered little opposition or hindrance in indulg- 
ing his tastes. Besides causing him to regard them 


In Primo. 


213 


with contempt and dislike, the conduct of his sisters 
has affected him but little. Consequently, he has 
had few experiences that incline him to deceit, and 
he has come to regard any sort of effort to keep up 
a good appearance as a great trouble ; therefore he 
prefers to take a very direct course in speech and 
action. 

“Your straightforward business dealing, while it 
struck him as very unusual, impressed him as the 
easiest, and consequently as the most desirable way 
to avoid inconvenience. Then, too, he admired and 
stood somewhat in awe of you, and was not 
insensible to the nobility of such a life as all this 
opened up before him. Thus he reached the first 
decisive moment of his life, and has turned his 
attention in a new direction. Having been moved, 
he is simply following an impulse in the right direc- 
tion. His selfishness is really helping him at this 
point, for he wants to stand on a level with you and 
Miss Case, and feels, rather than thinks, that he 
must take a certain course to accomplish this. The 
course happens to be an upward one ; so you and 
Miss Case, if you desire it, and are judicious, have 
an opportunity which only you two young ladies can 
use successfully.” 

i(< 4: ^ 

Nov. , 18 . 

Social opportunities! This con- 
tinues to be a vague term to me. Mrs. Howard, 
Esther, Mrs. Rodgers, Mr. Granby and even Mr. 
Markham, have all referred to these responsibilities, 
and each one seems to have a different view of these 


214 


In Prime. 


duties. I have also talked with Mr. and Mrs. Brooks, 
who hold still other views. 

During the past few months my studies and other 
duties have claimed my attention. I have also 
done what I could for the improvement and 
happiness of the young people in the vicinity. The 
house, the library and the grounds have been open 
to them. They seem to appreciate my interest in 
them, and my efforts to share with them my 
privileges and advantages. In turn, I have derived 
great benefit from this association, for these young 
people are surprisingly bright and intelligent. 

After long reflection I have decided to write a 
letter to Esther, of which the following is a copy: 

Sunset Park, Nov. ist, i8 — . 

Dear Esther: — The trees are stripped of their 
beautiful autumn leaves of crimson and gold; the 
bright, sunshiny days are gone, and the doors and 
windows are closed. 

Outside it is dark and cold; “it rains and the wind 
is never weary.” No more delightful walks in the 
woods, nor drives through ever varying country 
scenery. When the snow comes the bare trees, 
homely farm fences and black stubble fields may 
take on new beauty, but at present the eye rests on 
nothing cheerful or interesting. 

But come away from the window, and sit down 
with me in my inviting green library. The bright 
fire in the grate is throwing a warm, rosy light over 
the handsomely bound books in their artistic cases, 
and on the pictures on the wall. All is as cozy and 
homelike as can be; only one thing is lacking, 
namely, your presence. So, come and talk with me. 


In Prime. 


215 


For the last hour I have been in a brown study, 
and I am going to tell you all about it. You know 
I have been studying, but you do not know how 
hard. I never put in more busy hours at Fledding 
than I have since coming to Sunset Park. Several 
times Mrs. Rodgers has become alarmed and 
insisted upon less work and more recreation. Nearly 
every week, by urging upon me some duty to the 
young people in the vicinity, has she beguiled me 
into attending neighborhood entertainments and 
giving dinner parties ; or sometimes suggesting how 
pleasant it would be to have some young lady visit 
me for two or three days; perhaps she would 
remember that we ought to return visits and calls. 
When all else failed, she would pretend she was 
very lonesome, and complain that I never sat with 
her to talk. She has even threatened to advertise 
for a young lady companion for herself, so she would 
have some one to help her through with her lonely 
days. 

Mrs. Rodgers managed to have Nellie Millburn 
here during October, and it was made to appear that 
I could not very well excuse myself from daily 
driving her to and from the village school. How- 
ever, I was delighted with the arrangement, and 
greatly enjoyed Miss Millburn ’s stay at Sunset Park. 
Moreover, Nellie has helped me a great deal in my 
studies, in which she is deeply interested. 

Well, the result of all this is that I begin to feel 
very wise ; and I cannot do much more until I make 
a new venture out into the world. I think the time 
has come when I should turn my attention to what 
you and others have termed my “social duties. “ So 


2i6 


In Primo. 


I have decided it would be well for me to spend part 
of the winter in New York. How can it be 
managed? Mrs. Rodgers has been invited by the 
lady with whom her niece lives, to spend a month, 
including Christmas, with them, and I wish her to 
have the opportunity to do so. Therefore, I would 
like to go to New York about the first of December, 
and remain a month or so after the holidays. 

I want to be an inmate of a society home, and so 
far as may be, a part of it, so that I may pursue my 
new study to the best advantage, untrammeled by 
the cares and responsibilities of my own home. 

You asked about Mr. Cooper. There is nothing 
new to tell, I believe, — only that he has written 
Miss Case and myself each a letter, asking if we 
would be so kind as to correspond with “such a 
good-for-nothing scamp” as himself, and help him 
to keep up his courage to go through the drudgery 
of his law studies. We are going to do our best to 
grant his request. Hoping to hear from you soon, 
I am as ever, your loving JULIA. 

^ ^ ^ ♦ * * 
Nov. — , 1 8 — . — 

A letter from Esther tells me 
that Mrs. Howard has secured an invitation for me 
to spend some time in New York with Mrs. Bristol, 
one of her friends By the same mail I received a 
most cordial letter from Mrs. Bristol, in which she 
says it will give her great pleasure if I will spend 
two months of the season with her. 

I am glad that Esther approves of my going to the 
city; she says I have comprehended my affairs more 
quickly than she anticipated. 


CHAPTER XVIII. 


Dec. — , 1 8 — . — 

This afternoon I arrived at the 
palatial residence of Mrs. Bristol in New York. My 
desire to see something of the fashionable world is 
about to be gratified. So here I am with several 
trunks containing what seems a most generous 
outfit, but which, I understand, will need frequent 
replenishings to meet the large demands soon to be 
made upon it. Parsons is delighted to leave the 
country, and anticipates great satisfaction in giving 
free vent to her abilities and tastes in attiring a 
society young lady. 

Mrs. Bristol, whom I met to-day for the first time, 
is a tall, fair woman, with light brown hair, and gray- 
blue eyes lighted with a vivacious, but ever changing 
expression. She received me very cordially, and 
expressed her delight at having what she was 
pleased to call a beautiful young lady to chaperon 
during the season, remarking that she expected to 
be much courted by the gentlemen, as in that way 
they would hope to be more favorably represented 
to me. 

After resting a while in my room, it was time to 
prepare for dinner. As I viewed myself in the full 
length mirror I could not but notice that the blue 
silk evening dress in which Parsons had arrayed 
me, was very becoming; that the st3de in which it 
was made, with its long train, added much to the 
dignity of my appearance ; while the pearls on my 

217 


2i8 


In Primo. 


neck and arms seemed to leave nothing to be 
supplied. I must confess that I enjoyed my own 
reflection. I wonder if I am growing vain that I am 
so glad to be beautiful. 

On entering the brilliantly lighted drawing-room, 
I beheld Mrs. Bristol arrayed in a bewilderment of 
black silk, lace, and starlike diamonds, against 
which the dazzling whiteness of her shoulders, neck 
and arms formed a beautiful contrast. As I stood 
there, lost in wonder at her loveliness, she turned to 
me with her peculiarly fascinating smile, took my 
hand and introduced me to her husband, a faultlessly 
dressed gentleman, with so large a bank account 
that his mind has never been disturbed by considera- 
tion of ways and means. 

When seated at dinner, Mrs. Bristol informed me 
that she had arranged for a quiet evening all to 
ourselves, that we might talk over my costume for 
the ball on Friday night while Mr. Bristol was 
present, as she relied very much on his taste in such 
matters. She said that unless I preferred something 
different, she had already decided upon white silk and 
lace, but was uncertain about the ornaments until 
she saw me. Mr. Bristol observed that nothing 
could be more becoming than what I wore this 
evening. He thought that with his wife in diamonds 
and me in pearls we would prove excellent foils. 
But Mrs. Bristol objected, saying that something 
special must be done to offset Miss Ogden, who, she 
has ascertained, is to appear in a rich, orange 
colored dress, with a magnificent set of diamond- 
mounted jets. From what I heard of Miss Ogden, 
I think her toilets must be unapproachable, and Mr. 


In Primo. 


219 


Bristol says she has, as yet, outshone all rivals, and 
in that costume will be regal as an oriental queen. 

Mrs. Bristol then told of a Miss Rimmons, who 
made her debut last winter in pale pink, with cloudy 
white lace and pink rosebuds. 

“A dream of loveliness," said Mrs. Bristol, “until 
Miss Ogden swept into the room with her rose 
colored silk, trimmed with lace which gave her the 
appearance of having been sprinkled with genuine 
diamond dust. Do you recall the arrangement of 
her wonderful black hair and the effect of her 
magnificent dark eyes? Poor, dainty little Miss 
Rimmons faded and drooped, like a withered flower, 
while Miss Ogden carried all before her, remaining 
the triumphant queen of society and loveliness in 
New York.” 

“Well, do you think it will be hard to circumvent 
her?" inquired Mr. Bristol. “If our fresh blown 
blossom appears resting on clouds of soft white silk 
and lace, every other color must but enhance her 
loveliness. But the ornaments must be carefully 
considered. However, it seems to me that her 
abundant hair, fine eyes and delicate but natural 
color of lips and cheeks will be hard to eclipse." 

Mrs. Bristol finally decided that with festoons and 
vines of delicate green leaves, and a gleam of 
emeralds to give brilliancy to the effect, my white 
silk and lace would so harmonize with Miss Ogden’s 
orange as but to render my costume the more 
exquisite. 

“So," she said, “instead of one belle being 
reduced to a fading lily and the other developed into 
a blazing meteor, each will add to the success of the 


220 


In Prime. 


other. There is no use in trying to vanquish a 
woman of Miss Ogden’s style in such an attire as she 
has planned for Friday evening. ’ ’ 

“Oh,” I cried, “I would be sorry indeed to spoil 
her dress! I am sure that could give me no 
pleasure. Let us both look our best. ’ ’ 

But Mrs. Bristol only said, “Tut, tut, little one!” 
and declared I did not know with what I had to con- 
tend, — that Miss Ogden would spare nothing to 
annihilate me. 

“Well,” resumed Mr. Bristol, “I think your plan 
good, only do not have a profusion of the emeralds, 
— let there be just a glow of the jewels. The choice 
of materials and the arrangement of hair and 
drapery are the all-important matters now. ’ ’ 

On returning to the drawing-room Mrs. Bristol 
said she had understood I was a musician, and asked 
me to play something for them. Going to the piano 
I ran my fingers over the keys of the splendid 
instrument and asked : 

“What would you like to hear?” 

“Oh, whatever you can play best,” she replied. 

After I had played two or three pieces, she said: 

“That will do. Thank you very much. You play 
remarkably well.” 

Mrs. Bristol then desired me to select the finest 
piece of music I dared undertake and practice it 
until I could play it perfectly ; she said I must also 
have a second selection ready, as some one would be 
likely to insist on hearing more of what she called 
my excellent performance, and assured me she 
would call me forward at the most propitious 
moment. Then, telling me that hitherto Miss 


In Prime. 


2^1 


Ogden had been their prima donna, she expressed her 
confidence that I could easily excel her, which 
would at least give me a slight advantage, and this, 
at the beginning, Mrs. Bristol thought to be very 
important. 

When I again protested that I would rather be 
good friends with Miss Ogden than to eclipse her, 
Mrs. Bristol cried out : 

“Good friends with her! Of course you must be 
good friends. You must seem to admire her and to 
be utterly unconscious of your own attractions. 
Otherwise you will spoil everything. Only, you 
must not let her patronize you, but be friends with 
her in every way that will enhance your own 
charms. ’ ’ 

“Will not that be treating her dishonorably?” I 
asked. 

Again Mrs. Bristol seemed surprised, asked if I 
thought she would want me to do anything wrong, 
and said : 

“I have had many years of experience in social 
matters and I know what is right. Trust me.” 

Mr. Bristol informed me that when he first met his 
wife she was the belle of the season; that her youth 
and beauty still enabled her to hold her place, and 
that many of the young ladies were quite jealous of 
her. 

“This,” continued Mr. Bristol, “is the first time 
Mrs. Bristol has undertaken to bring out a young 
lady and I am quite interested in her success ; so 
you must not oppose her plans.” 

“No, indeed ! I want this to be something unique. 
I am young enough to be your chum, but as a 


222 


In Primo. 


married lady I can also be your chaperon. We 
shall plan to help each other; I will advance your 
interests as a marriageable young lady, which favor 
you will reciprocate by bringing around me a class 
of people among whom I wish to be a recognized 
leader. Now, I have told you a social truth, some- 
thing I do not often consider necessary; but our 
mutual interests require a perfect understanding, 
and I see that this is the best course to pursue with 
you. 

“Hitherto, as a young married lady, I have held 
my own, and worked my way along quietly but 
surely. But I have now reached a time when I can 
accomplish my purpose better by having on hand a 
beautiful young heiress like yourself, whose attrac- 
tions will bring about me the young men belonging 
to the upper class in New York society. The young 
ladies of the same social standing will follow ; and of 
course, the wise papas and mammas will hover 
around where the desirable young people gather. 
So, because of the favors I can confer, the probabil- 
ities are, that by the end of the season, I shall have 
accomplished my ambition to be acknowledged as 
a leader in our part of the social world, by those 
among whom I now stand as only an equal.” 

I tried to explain to Mrs. Bristol that while I 
would be glad to help her in any way I could, still I 
did not wish her to inconvenience herself on my 
account ; also, that I came to the city simply to see 
something of society life, and because I thought I 
would enjoy it. I told her that I was not anxious 
to outshine any one, and if the people would be kind 
to me it was all I desired. 


In Primo. 


233 


Mr. Bristol assured me they had every confi- 
dence in my ability to fulfill their expectations, 
and prophesied for me a brilliant and successful 
season. 

They then spoke of the unusual number of young 
men in the city for whom the friends of society 
young ladies were ready to bid high. They 
intimated that a young lady of my position would 
rarely have a better opportunity to make a desirable 
settlement. 

“These considerations are not to be ignored,” con- 
cluded Mr. Bristol. 

“Oh, yes, and young Lord Riverton is here too!” 
exclaimed Mrs. Bristol. “To be sure, he is as poor 
as a church mouse, but he has a title that reaches 
back into history. If he marries a young lady of 
wealth she will have an assured position.” 

I could have cried with vexation and shame as I 
disclaimed coming to New York with such schemes 
in my mind. I asked them to arrange as they 
thought best about my costume, for of course I 
would like to look well, and what they proposed 
seemed suitable ; but begged them not to refer to 
those other matters. 

As it was now late, Mrs. Bristol kissed me, and 
they bade me good night. I came to my room and, 
feeling too wide-awake to sleep, I have written up 
my journal. 

This conversation with Mr. and Mrs. Bristol dis- 
turbs me. Of course, as Mrs. Bristol told me, this 
was an evening spent in confidential talk for which 
there may be no further opportunity ; and not know- 
ing them well, I must have somewhat misunderstood 


224 


In Primo. 


them. It does not seem possible that they really 
mean I shall launch out on a systematic scheme to 
deceive people; to make them believe I am much 
pleased with them, and interested in their welfare, 
when really I am making every effort to circumvent 
them and thwart their plans, — to the end that I 
may profit by their misfortunes and disappoint- 
ments. Yes, I must have misunderstood Mr. and 
Mrs. Bristol. 

Mrs. Bristol would do anything to please any one, 
and help a friend all she could, provided the one 
benefited would follow in her train, acknowledging 
her as a leader. To say the least, she seems very 
ambitious. Mr. Bristol seems more interested in 
society matters, entertainments and amusements, 
than in anything else. When I get well acquainted 
with them I hope I shall understand them better. 

Dec. — , 1 8 — . — 

Certainly I am in a new world. 
This morning at breakfast, Mr. and Mrs. Bristol 
discussed final arrangements for their ball. The 
main thing seems to be to excel, in artistic arrange- 
ment and grandeur of effect, all the previous affairs 
of the season. Mrs. Bristol frequently reminds me 
of how much she depends on me to make the evening 
a success. Once she remarked : 

“You see how important it is for me to have a 
young lady who will be the acknowledged belle of 
the season. ’ ’ 

I again tried to tell her how unequal I am to what 
she expects, and that she will probably be dis- 
appointed so far as I am concerned, at which she 
only smiled and replied : 


in Primo. 


^25 


“Look just as pretty, and be as sweet as you can, 
and all will be well. ’ ’ 

After breakfast we saw the dressmaker. Mrs* 
Bristol charged her repeatedly to be sure to make 
my dress in the prettiest and most becoming style, 
and promised future patronage if I proved a success. 
The dressmaker praised my appearance, assuring 
Mrs. Bristol again and again that she need give 
herself no concern, for I should be the best dressed 
young lady in the room. 

This evening a number of people were here to 
dinner. When I have been in the city at different 
times, staying at the hotel where I saw society 
people, ' I have wished that I was one of their 
number, — that I knew the topics of their conversa- 
tion, and how they spent their time generally. 
Now my desire was gratified, — I was one of their 
number. The guests were Mr. and Mrs. Benson 
and their daughter, Mr. and Mrs. Sandford, daughter 
and son, besides two other young gentlemen. 

Mrs. Benson wore a rich, black velvet dress; Mrs. 
Sandford’s dress was of heavy, silver-gray silk; 
Miss Benson, a tall, somewhat languid young lady, 
with fair, rather colorless complexion, and large, 
dreamy brown eyes, was attired in delicate green 
silk with most beautiful rose pearls. She talks 
little, her manner indicating her acquiescence in 
whatever others say. Miss Sandford was dressed in 
pale purple, which is, I judge, her most becoming 
color ; as, if one were quite frank, her hair is what 
would be called red, and her complexion is some- 
what florid. But she looks well in that shade of 
purple ; her features are well rounded and regular. 


226 


In Primo. 


and, although below medium height, she is well 
formed and plump enough to redeem her from 
looking insignificant. She is bright, talks well, and 
is not in the least timid. 

They talked about theaters, concerts, balls and 
receptions, past and prospective. Their conversa- 
tion was interspersed with personal compliments, 
and instrumental music rendered by the young 
ladies. As their performances were rather ordinary, 
when Mrs. Bristol sent me to the piano I gave them 
a few simple pieces I picked up last summer. 

After their guests were gone Mrs. Bristol 
exclaimed: 

“There, that is over and quite satisfactorily!” 

“Yes,” rejoined Mr. Bristol, “but how tiresome!” 

But Mrs. Bristol said that they were people who 
could not be ignored, and it was impossible to 
invite them to a regular dinner party. 

“Miss Benson,” she continued, “will probably 
marry that dull young Monroe, whose mother moves 
in the very first society. ’ ’ 

Mrs. Bristol also said that of course Mrs. Monroe 
did not like the notion of her son’s marrying into a 
family that had so recently come up from the plow 
and the mill. But as they have money and are 
accumulating more, she is making the best of it. 

“So,” Mrs. Bristol concluded, “if we keep up a 
tolerable intimacy with Miss Nellie Benson, we 
shall stand a chance of being very acceptable to 
Mrs. Clarence Monroe.” 

Mr. Bristol remarked that young Mr. Sandford is 
also likely to succeed in connecting himself with a 
family of high position and decreasing means, by 


In Primo. 


227 


marrying, as he said, “that plain Miss Crawford. “ 
Mr. Bristol seemed much pleased over an invitation 
to take a tenting-out trip next spring, as the guest 
of young Mr. Sandford, and pronounced him “a 
jolly good fellow, who spends his money freely.” 

“Who else is going?” inquired Mrs. Bristol. 

“Oh, a lot of upper ten fellows, you may be sure, 
or he would not presume to ask me. He under- 
stands that. ’ ' 

They then discussed their guests at length, Mrs. 
Bristol pronouncing Mrs. Benson “very ambitious 
without the least tact in concealing it!” She 
declared that from her manner, any one would 
readily see that her mother skimmed milk and 
washed dishes in her girlhood. It seems she made 
what, for her, was considered a fortunate marriage, 
as Mrs. Benson’s father, from a small beginning, 
became a well-to-do real estate dealer. Mr. Benson, 
having engaged in the same business, has become 
very wealthy. Miss Nellie is their only daughter. 

“She would be quite pretty,” remarked Mrs. 
Bristol, “if she were to brighten up a little; as it is, 
she is the most stupidly good natured girl I ever 
saw. ’ ’ 

But they consider that the Sandfords are bright 
enough. It seems their money comes to them as 
the result of lucky investments in western mines. 
Mrs. Sandford was described as a quiet, self- 
satisfied, comfortable woman. 

“But,” said Mr. Bristol, “her husband sees and 
understands everything, and their daughter is just 
like him. She took in the whole situation this 
evening, and if she ever gets the chance, will pay 


228 


In Primo. 


you up for inviting her to ‘an informal dinner, at 
which just a few intimate friends will be present. 

Mrs. Bristol, however, expressed herself as 
having no concern about that, for, before Miss 
Sandford would get such “a chance” her brother 
will have married Miss Crawford, and she herself 
will have received more satisfactory attention from 
Mrs. Bristol. 

Mr. Bristol thought she was, no doubt, correct, 
and said that he would leave her to manage the 
social ladder. He then remarked that I looked tired 
and as if I had not enjoyed myself. 

“But,’^ said he, “we must take the good with the 
bad. To-morrow night you will make up for the 
wearisomeness of this evening. ’ ’ 

“Oh, indeed,” I replied, “you do not understand 
me. I have been much interested, as well as much 
puzzled this evening. If you do not enjoy the com- 
pany of these people, why did you invite them 
here? Certainly, if they knew how you felt they 
would not care to come.” 

“Don’t you understand?” asked Mrs. Bristol. 
“Because their antecedents were outside the pale of 
society they have not been accepted unconditionally 
here ; yet, on account of their unlimited wealth, as I 
have said, there is every prospect of their becoming 
connected with some of our most exclusive families. 
Therefore, although I cannot invite them with peo- 
ple of more assured position without giving offense, 
I want to keep in favor with them in order to 
benefit myself in their coming day of power. For 
this reason I invited them informally, as intimate 
friends, which cannot be considered otherwise than 


In Primo. 


229 


as a compliment, at a time when I could not be 
expected to have a large party.” 

“But,” I queried, “if they understood your 
motives how could they think it a compliment?” 

Mrs. Bristol then explained that Mr. and Mrs. 
Benson and Mrs. Sandford were too stupid to under- 
stand anything about it ; that they were satisfied to 
be simply rich and comfortable. Mr. Sandford, his 
son and daughter, in all probability, she thought, 
understood the situation and knew that while Mrs. 
Bristol had done the best thing for herself, she had 
also done the best thing possible for them. In 
short, they must know that the affair was one of 
mutual benefit. 

‘ ‘ In my way, ” she said, ‘ ‘ I lift them upward now ; by 
and by they in their turn will reciprocate the favor.” 

“Yes,” added Mr. Bristol, “they can at least 
speak of having dined at the Bristols’. But Miss 
Seymour will better learn these things by experience. 
It is very late and we have a full day to-morrow. 
We shall need some rest before morning.” 

So, bidding one another good night, we sepa- 
rated. On my table I found a letter from Mrs. 
Howard. By some oversight it was not sent up 
earlier. As I have been so troubled over all I have 
seen and heard since coming to the city, and am still 
too restless to sleep, I will copy it. Perhaps writing 
Mrs. Howard’s comforting words will incline me to 
sleep. 

Boston, Dec. 4th, 18 — ; 

My dear Julia:- — 

I have been thinking about you and 
wondering how you are enjoying your first glimpse 


230 


In Primo. 


of the world, about which you have been so curious. 
If I understand you aright, I think this letter will 
find you about the most astonished and mystified 
young lady in New York. You are so thor- 
oughly honest and sincere yourself, that you will 
be much amazed at what society people consider 
polite and proper. Do not be too much distressed 
by all this. Your nature is such that you can never 
be other than true and frank; and it is not necessary 
nor right that you should be. Quietly, and without 
controversy, go on in your unpretending way, — 
being kind, and as far as possible, helpful to all, and 
you will have no difficulty. In time, too, you will 
find that many, whose words now seem to have no 
meaning, because only spoken to fall pleasantly on 
the ear, — are really kind-hearted, well intentioned 
people. They simply have never known any other 
life, and think nothing about the signification of their 
words. For example : Mrs. Bristol, devoted to 
society, does and says all sorts of insincere things, 
yet she rarely says or does anything really harmful 
to any one. True, she always tries to manage as 
she thinks will be most to her own advantage ; still, 
she never does anything in a malicious spirit. Of 
course, you will meet those of whom this cannot be 
said; but the same is true of all classes of people, 
and is not an especial peculiarity of the society 
world. 

On the other hand, you will, ere long, meet those 
who are as honest and sincere as you are, — who will 
be congenial and in perfect harmony with yourself. 
They, however, do not usually devote themselves so 
exclusively to society as does Mrs. Bristol. We 


In Prime. 


231 


might say that while they are in society they are 
not of it. 

I said nothing of all this before you went to New 
York, because I thought you would understand me 
better if I waited until you had a little experience 
in your new life. 

Please remember that I am your friend, and also, 
that since I arranged for your introduction into 
society, I consider that you have a claim on me 
whenever you may wish for information or advice 
that I am able to give. Yours with love, 

CORDELIA HOWARD. 


CHAPTER XIX. 


Dec. — , 1 8 — . — 

After my first night of indulgence 
in fashionable amusements, I have been very dull 
all day, but feel more wide-awake this evening. 

I have been to a ball, a very fashionable ball. As 
a result am I any better satisfied with life? Am I 
any clearer in my convictions of duty? Perhaps I 
have not had time to study all the phases of these 
questions in the light of last night’s experience. 
However that may be, I find myself somewhat con- 
fused by the multitudinous and varied impressions I 
received. May it not be well to review them? 

When I saw my reflection in the long mirror in my 
dressing-room, I felt that surely I had no cause for 
dissatisfaction! As Mrs. Bristol has since said, the 
dressmaker’s art and Parsons’ skill had omitted 
nothing that could enhance my natural attractions. 
The excitement caused by anticipation, together 
with the thrill of pleasure I felt in the consciousness 
that I had never seen any one so tastefully arrayed 
as the figure I viewed in the mirror, added a glow 
of animation to my expression. 

As I proceeded to the ball-room, Mrs. Bristol’s 
admonition to “retain my self-possession under all 
circumstances, ” recurred to me. Could I doit? I 
was not very confident. On entering, Mrs. Bristol’s 
look of approval steadied me somewhat; but the 
slight hush in our immediate vicinity, and the knowl- 
edge that many eyes were turned towards me, com- 

232 


In Prime. 


233 


pelled the utmost effort to overcome my trepidation. 
Introductions followed, and I found myself, through 
Mrs. Bristol’s management, I am sure, tete-a-tete 
with Lord Riverton, who stared at me obtrusively 
through his eyeglass, while complimenting me. ' I 
did not feel certain as to how he intended his 
flattering remarks to be understood. Surely he did 
not expect me to take such personalities seriously! 
It seemed equally impossible that, on such short 
acquaintance, he would use such expressions in a 
bantering way. Therefore I did not know how to 
reply, — but as I must say something, I concluded to 
treat his remarks as good natured jests to a girl 
having her first experience in society, and said 
laughingly : 

“Really, Lord Riverton, you do not know how 
vain you may make me. ’ ’ 

“Vain! That were impossible to one with such 
soft and gentle eyes.’’ 

“Oh, I assure you, I am growing very conceited. ’ ’ 

“A small fault in one who must perceive an 
admirer in every beholder ! ’ ’ 

“I am surprised that those in the room show so 
little appreciation ! Is it not strange they are not 
silent with admiration and wonder?’’ 

“Ah,’’ said he, “one so accustomed to homage as 
Miss Seymour can but regard my poor tribute as 
insignificant.’’ 

“Indeed, you are quite mistaken. Your sincerity 
is so evident, your judgment so penetrating, that I 
feel perfectly safe in accepting your opinion!’’ 

Lord Riverton gave me a quick, questioning 
glance and bowing, said : 


234 


In Primo. 


“Miss Seymour honors me!” But he looked 
uncomfortable, and a silence fell. Just then 
another introduction demanded my attention. More 
compliments followed, to which I fear my replies 
were not always conventional. Really, there was 
no conversation, in the ordinary sense of the word, 
throughout the whole evening. I cannot now recall 
a sentence which was not the most commonplace 
remark, the most fulsome flattery, or at best, a more 
or less direct compliment. The refreshments were 
declared delicious ; the music enrapturing ; the 
decorations so exquisite; and the beauty of the 
ladies so entrancing. 

Judging from my observation of those near me, 
the experience of the other ladies did not differ from 
my own. I noticed, however, that they received the 
remarks upon their personal charms in rather a 
different manner from that in which I received 
mine. A lady, when told that she sang like a 
seraph, replied, “Thank you very much. ” Another, 
when her partner declared that she danced like a 
fairy, said, “You make me wish to dance forever.” 
One, when complimented on her fascinating and 
peerless beauty by a gentleman who begged her 
hand for the pleasure of a dance, returned : 

“It would be impossible to refuse your agreeable 
request.” 

Mrs. Bristol says all this was merely harmless 
flirtation, and that the “shy, and rather shrinking 
manner” in which I received the eulogistic tributes 
showered upon me, but riveted the chains with which 
I bound my victims. I have not repeated to her my 
conversation with Lord Riverton, for I soon found 


In Primo. 


235 


that such compliments formed the substance of such 
conversation as went on around me. 

Miss Ogden was so delighted to make my 
acquaintance, — said that she had been told yesterday 
that she would need to be careful to-night, or she 
must lay down her scepter. In great distress I 
began to protest, but she stopped me, saying that 
she would not have me suppose her so lacking in 
appreciation that she could not recognize radiant and 
unrivaled beauty; nor, recognizing it, that she had 
not the nobility sincerely to congratulate the happy 
possessor of such charms. 

I assured her she was mistaken in thus rating 
whatever about me might be pleasing, and ex- 
pressed a wish that she would forget all these 
things. 

“Simply be my friend,” said I, “and I hope you 
will let me be yours.” 

“Just the thing!” she replied, “you are quick in 
understanding a situation. And that air of sim- 
plicity becomes you the best of anything you could 
adopt. This season we will present something 
unique. We will be friends instead of rivals, and 
each by way of contrast will emphasize the attrac- 
tions of the other. ’ ’ 

‘ ‘ But you do not understand me. I mean that, — ’ ’ 
I began, — when, tapping me on the shoulder, with a 
smile she turned away to greet others. 

Of course Miss Ogden and I can never be friends. 
Either our ideals are different, or she is a calculat- 
ing girl. In either case we can have nothing in 
common. Query: In what other place could I be, 
where, from my simple presence there, I could be 


236 


In Primo. 


so misjudged? I wonder if others were thinking the 
same of me ! 

Mrs. Bristol says that Miss Ogden considers 
herself vanquished, and sees that joining her forces 
with mine, on terms of equality, is the only chance 
of maintaining her position as the peerless beauty 
of New York; and she again warned me not to let 
Miss Ogden patronize me, as that would give her 
a conclusive advantage. I told Mrs. Bristol that I 
would be no one’s rival, but she merely laughed, 
saying : 

“We shall see if Miss Ogden has things all her 
own way. ’ ’ 

All this is very unsatisfactory and disappointing. 

Besides those who were engaged in complimentary 
dissertation, were the young people who said but 
little, and seemed to think what they did say very 
amusing, for they laughed continuously, and I 
wondered what they were so merry over. When, in 
the course of the evening, I happened to be in their 
vicinity, I found nothing that was to me amusing. 
A young man made some flippant remark at which 
all in his neighborhood were convulsed with 
laughter ; a young lady replied in a similar strain, 
and again there was a burst of merriment. It 
reminded me of the little girls at Mrs. Bradford’s, 
at the beginning of a new school year. When 
sent out to the play-ground for the first time, for a 
while they would regard each other shyly ; then one 
after another would break out into a little laugh ; 
presently, as they overcame their timidity, they 
would all laugh together. But here the comparison 
ends, — for the children soon found something of 


In Primo. 




interest, — to themselves, at least, — to talk about; 
which these young people seemed unable to do. I 
used to enjoy the laughter of the little girls, for I 
knew it prepared the way for happy companionship ; 
but the laughter of these seemingly grown-up 
children promised neither entertainment nor 
instruction. As I cannot laugh at anything that 
does not appeal to my sense of humor, my interest 
in them ceased. 

At another time I found myself near a group of 
elderly ladies, who were discussing society oc- 
currences, conjecturing probable happenings, and 
now and then remarking upon the toilets, move- 
ments and prospects of those present. 

Occasionally I noticed a group of elderly men 
gravely conversing. But very soon Mrs. Bristol 
would appear among them, and in her cordial, easy 
manner, disperse them in various directions; one to 
talk with a lady, for the moment disengaged ; 
another with a message to a person in a remote part 
of the room ; a third was asked to bring her fan 
from a place where it had been left ; and so on, until 
she had broken the circle, — in the meantime man- 
aging to bring together other people as best suited 
her purposes. 

Mrs. Bristol declares that grave conferences must 
not be permitted, if one hopes to carry a ball 
through to a successful end, and complains that 
middle-aged men require a deal of looking after. 
She also informed me that she kept a constant 
watch lest I lead some one into a discussion of 
philosophical or social questions, which would have 
thrown a shadow over the whole company. Mrs. 


238 


In Primo. 


Bristol’s guests pronounce her a perfect hostess, and 
greatly admire her ability in keeping every one 
engaged, and in good spirits, as well as on good 
terms with themselves and every one else. 

I really did enjoy dancing to the time of that 
grand orchestra; yet, after awhile I found myself 
wearying of this style of music, and longing for 
something deeper, more soul-moving, — something 
classical, which stirs, rouses and elevates my whole 
being, — in comparison with which the music 
adapted to the ball-room sinks into insignificance. 
Until I join the great orchestra in the hereafter, I 
shall never be able to express in words or song 
what the masterpieces of great musicians on earth 
have meant to me. 

I also enjoyed the graceful and artistic arrange- 
ment of the rooms, and of all that went to make 
the evening a success in its way. I should have 
enjoyed the apparent cordiality and urbanity of the 
guests had there been less flattery, and had I not 
been oppressed with a remembrance of some of 
Mrs. Bristol’s remarks on politic politeness. It 
would have given me rare pleasure, had I been per- 
mitted to enjoy the marvelously beautiful costumes 
of the ladies, and the elegant, — sometimes too 
exquisite, bearing and attire of the gentlemen ; for I 
love to look at beautiful people and imagine that 
their characters are as beautiful as their exteriors; 
but as it was, the deference and tributes paid to 
myself and those around me were so embarrassing 
as to seem almost indelicate. And as I intimated 
before, Mrs. Bristol’s remarks echoed in my ears 
and heart, so that I felt there was a lack of sincerity 


In Primo. 


^39 


in what I was hearing, which greatly marred my 
enjoyment of what would otherwise have given me 
great pleasure. I wondered, too, how many plans 
and schemes were being carried out by means of 
those flattering expressions and sweet smiles. 

I could not help thinking how delightful it would 
have been, if those who I am sure could talk and 
talk well, instead of confining themselves so closely 
to laudatory personal remarks, only would have 
introduced a little more bright, animated, yet 
sensible conversation on subjects that must interest, 
more or less, all intelligent people. Had none of the 
guests recently seen a superb painting; a master- 
piece of statuary or architecture? Could no one 
recall a stanza from some rising poet, or quote a 
sentence from some original thinker, making enough 
comment to show a gleam of thought that would 
cause us to long for an opportunity to hear more? 
Would not this have been as compatible with 
really merry pastime, as the “done to death” com- 
pliments? Truly, I did not hear one sally of what 
could be called real wit or genuine humor ; only that 
continuous strain of flattering and parrying. If 
these people had no fund of humor within them- 
selves, surely it would have been permissible to 
quote from some humorist or satirist they had read! 
No, — really, it was not fun nor merry-making. I 
wonder what people attend these balls for. 

I suppose it would have been considered bad form 
had I mentioned to one of my nartners the excellent 
and helpful sermon I heard last Sunday at Hampton. 
This is a question with me, — if the general atmos- 
phere of the ball-room debars literary reference, all 


240 


In Primo. 


comment on social conditions and remedies, and 
especially renders any allusion to religious matters 
objectionable and out of place, — is the ball-room 
then a proper place for an earnest, intelligent 
Christian? 

If all that truly and deeply interests me has no 
admission to the ball-room, what shall I find there 
that can have any attraction for me? 

As I began this entry, so I must close it, — with 
the question : having been to a fashionable ball, as 
a result am I any better satisfied with life? Am I 
clearer as to my convictions of duty? As things 
look to-night, I could not return an answer favor- 
able to the ball-room. 

However, I will not be hasty in my conclusions, 
but will watch and wait awhile longer before 
deciding what position I shall take upon this ques- 
tion. I suppose I shall find an answer to my 
inquiries ere long. 

^ ^ 4e sic 4: 

Dec. , I 8 . 

Ever since I reached New York I 
have been in a whirl of social engagements. Calls, 
dinner parties, concerts, theaters and balls fill my 
programme until long after Christmas. I have 
little time to think quietly. 

Learning that Mr. Granby was in the city, I men- 
tioned my acquaintance with him. At once Mrs. 
Bristol started up, exclaiming: 

“Do you know the Honorable H. Granby? Why, 
he is one of the lions of the hour! Did you say he 
asked you to inform him of your arrival? Pray do 
so at once ! As an orator he has made a national 


In Prime. 


241 


reputation ; he has been a successful statesman also ; 
many say that the state governorship is now within 
his reach. 

“They do say, too, that he is uncomfortably uncon- 
ventional in his ideas, although a model gentleman 
in dress, manners, culture and education. But then, 
you know, we allow and admire eccentricities in men 
of his position which we would not tolerate in lesser 
lights. 

“Is he then so very rich?” 

“Rich? No! But he is famous. I believe he is 
a very talented and able lawyer; although he thus 
commands a fine income, he spends so much time 
and money reforming the world and fighting corrupt 
city corporations, breweries, saloons and all that 
sort of thing, that he is not likely to get rich very 
soon. 

“Nevertheless, he is well connected, and was 
introduced in New York by the Clintons, who are 
really the most exclusive people in the East. Mrs. 
Clinton I have beheld from afar; her fine patrician 
face always stands in my mind for all that is aristo- 
cratic and well descended. In truth, I suppose hers 
is the bluest blue blood in the country. * ’ 

“She must be a superior woman to be the intimate 
friend of the Granbys. ’ ’ 

“Of the Granbys! Do you know other members 
of the family?” 

I told Mrs. Bristol I had made the acquaintance 
of Miss Isabelle at the home of a mutual friend. I 
also told her what I had heard concerning the 
family. 

“Dear me!” said she, “this is fine. Of course 


242 


In Primo. 


Mr. Granby will call, and an acquaintance with the 
Clintons will follow. My dear, you have done me 
the best turn I have had for many a day ! Do you 
know any more such people?” 

“Oh, yes!” I replied in a teasing mood. “I know 
Nellie Millburn, a teacher at Hampton, and Miss 
Case who teaches at . ” 

“You provoking girl! Answer my question.” 

“You asked if I knew any more such people as the 
Granbys; since I consider these young ladies as 
cultured and interesting as the Granbys, I mentioned 
them. I think, too, Mr. Granby would approve my 
judgment.” 

“Oh, you wee lambkin! If some one does not 
guard you and protect you, the dissolute, hypo- 
critical fortune-hunter will eat you up some day!” 

“Mrs. Bristol, I do not like that! Although your 
remarks would insinuate that I have little capability 
or judgment, thus far, at least, I have found little 
difficulty in distinguishing self-interested people 
from those who are sincere. Moreover, I am not in 
a hurry to be eaten up by any one.” 

“Now, child, don't be foolish! It is more than 
evident you are in no hurry ; otherwise Lord River- 
ton would not have failed to secure from you a share 
of favor that would mark him as preferred above all 
rivals; to say nothing of a score of others who are 
scorching their wings hovering around you; an 
alliance with any one of whom would have been 
considered a brilliant success by any young lady 
save yourself. 

“These young men do not pretend to be very 
good, — that is the trouble. I must give them a 


In Primo. 


243 


hint as to where they may find the road that leads 
to your heart. I am glad Mr. Granby does not 
seem to be a marrying man, or I should expect to 
see him bearing away the prize. Whatever 
advantage it may be to know him socially, he is not 
my ideal of a suitor for you. There now, I have 
vexed you again!” 

And she drew me down beside her on the sofa, 
petting me, and telling me she would not have me 
get angry with her for the world. There is no use 
arguing with Mrs. Bristol, so as soon as I could get 
away, I came to my room. 

:ic ^ ^ He ifc 

Dec. — , 18 — . — 

Mr. Granby called this afternoon. 
While shaking hands he gave me a quick, searching 
glance, unobserved by others, and rather felt than 
seen by me. I wore a rich, but simply made white 
velvet dress with few ornaments. In some way that 
I cannot explain, I was conscious that he was 
pleased with my appearance. As usual, I was so 
perfectly at ease in Mr. Granb3^’s presence that I 
felt not the least embarrassment. 

Mrs. Bristol has invited Mr. Granby and others to 
a dinner party for one evening this week. He 
intimated that at that time we would probably have 
an opportunity to make some plans for me to see 
the other side of New York life and interests. 

Yesterday I was at Church, where many 

New York society people attend. I must write to 
Esther that if Episcopal Church people are rever- 
ential in their church manners, all of their clergymen 
are not so. Yesterday morning the clergyman 


244 


In Primo. 


hurried through the reading with really indecent 
haste, even mumbling the prayers; the congrega- 
tion seeming infected by his example. I was as 
much shocked by the absence of anything like real 
worship, as Esther was by the restlessness of that 
Methodist congregation about which she wrote me. 


CHAPTER XX. 


Dec. — , 1 8 — . — ' 

This evening I received two 
letters, one from Mrs. Rodgers and one from Miss 
Case. I will copy the part of Mrs. Rodgers’ letter in 
which she refers to social amusements. 

Boston, Dec. i8th, i8 — . 

My dear Julia: — 

si? ❖ ^ H« 

I am not in the least surprised that things im- 
press you as they do. I should have been greatly 
mistaken in your character and principles had it 
been otherwise. 

I think you are quite correct in your opinion of 
dancing, and I also agree with you that much the 
same may be said of theaters and card parties. They 
lack the true element of wholesome amusement, and 
contain much that is objectionable. I especially 
approve of all you say about the ball dress, and the 
exposure of person to which it subjects the wearer. 
Although the divine artist never made anything 
more beautiful than the human form, yet the 
customs of civilized society for centuries, and the 
inherited tendencies of the race are such, that any 
Style of dress which unnecessarily exposes its out- 
line, is, to say the least, ill advised. 

I, too, am deeply grieved that wine has so 
prominent a place at all these entertainments, and I 
am humiliated that women, even young women, 
245 


246 


In Primo. 


use their influence to promote its use. As things 
are, there are few circles of society, or places of 
amusement, — and I greatly fear, few of our Chris- 
tian colleges, where mothers can safely send their 
young sons, feeling that here there are no young 
women who use their influence to promote the use 
of the wine cup. 

I need not further supplement what you have said 
about the ball-room, but will add a few thoughts on 
some points which you have not touched concerning 
theaters. 

Mr. Rodgers used to say that he thought it 
inappropriate and inconsistent for respectable 
people to countenance, or indorse by attendance, any 
place of entertainment where the performers were 
people, whom, on account of their doubtful 
character, they would be unwilling to receive in 
their homes as friends, or recognize as acquaintances 
on the street. 

It cannot be denied that there have been actors 
and actresses who were good men and women ; but 
for my part I do not want my associations to be 
such, that when I die, it will be necessary for some 
one to explain to the public that, notwithstanding my 
profession or occupation, and associations, I was 
really a pure woman. I want that fact to be so 
established that to mention any necessity for an 
explanation would be a disrespect. The public is 
always uncertain as to the character of actors and 
actresses; and those among them who live pure 
personal lives have to bear the taint which attaches 
to the reputation of the profession in general. I 
cannot help thinking there must be something lack- 


In Primo. 


247 


ing in their self-respect, if nothing more, when they 
choose and remain in such a profession. 

Hi 

I think Mrs. Rodgers is right. 

Miss Case, in her letter, mentions having seen Mr. 
Cooper again, and that he is really greatly 
improved, is studying hard, and taking advantage of 
all his opportunities to the best of his ability. She 
seems hopeful of his success in his new ambitions. 

Dec. — , 18 — . — 

This evening Mr. Granby and 
several others were here to dinner. Among the 
guests was a Mr. Volt, who is a rising author. He 
is very cynical, and has a characteristic way of 
emphasizing people’s weak points that is not always 
agreeable. Mrs. Bristol detests Mr. Volt, but says 
she must endure him because, just now, he is quite 
the rage. 

When we returned from the dining-room, in some 
way a few of us who happened to be grouped 
together, were drawn into a conversation about 
dancing. I expressed much the same opinion that 
I already have written in this journal, as to what I 
thought would add much to the interest and enjoy- 
ment of such entertainments. To this Mrs. Bristol 
objected, saying: 

“But, my dear Miss Seymour, people go to balls to 
enjoy the music and dancing and prefer to abandon 
themselves, for the time being, to that amusement, 
with the mind unincumbered with more than the 
pleasure of the hour.” 

“I can understand,” I replied, ‘‘how one might 


248 


In Primo. 


enjoy an hour of such pastime, but the thing that I 
cannot comprehend is, how one can go through with 
it night after night, for four or five months out of 
every year. ’ ’ 

Then Mrs. Bristol declared that I would change a 
ball-room into a conversazione, to which I returned : 

“I do not see why a little feast of reason would 
not be quite consistent with any sort of amusement, 
as well as add zest to the enjoyment of the hour.” 

“Any discussion of this sort,” urged Mrs. Phillips, 
“however informal and desultory, would be unen- 
joyable to half the younger guests; the majority of 
the other half of the young people would probably 
say that when they wished to hear such matters 
discussed they would attend the various clubs 
organized for these purposes. ’ ’ 

“But, Mrs. Phillips, I am not contending for 
literary, or any other discussion at your balls. 
Indeed, I would retain and encourage more real 
merriment and wit than I have yet seen, all of 
which would be quite in keeping with a little of the 
rational conversation for which I am pleading. ’ ’ 
“After all,” began Mr. Granby, “more important 
than the matter of present enjoyment, is the ques- 
tion as to what will be the result of spending so 
much of life in this way. Will not one who, from 
early youth, thus invests his time as well as his 
physical and mental power, become in reality as 
light headed and as empty hearted as the dancers 
have impressed Miss Seymour as being? Must not 
those who spend their years and energies on trifles, 
themselves become mere triflers? All amusements 
should be judged from the standpoint of results, 


In Primo. 


249 


rather than from the pleasure derived from them 
in the present hour.** 

“That,** said I, “reminds me of a sermon I heard 
in the city last summer, in which the clergyman said 
that all we say or do, and all with which we come 
in contact, enters into and becomes a part of our life 
and character. Then how can we afford to live for 
mere amusement, to say nothing of the time, which, 
according to this, is worse than wasted? Judged 
from these standpoints and principles, how shall we 
reach the best of which we are capable, — how build 
lofty and steadfast character, — build wisely — 
broadly, if we give our time and thought to balls, 
theaters and card parties? These things impress me 
as being serious matters, for — 

‘The tissues of the life to be 

We weave with colors all our own^ 

And in the field of destiny 
We reap as we have sown.* ’* 

“I am surprised,’* followed Miss Hamilton, “to 
find one who, like myself, does not fully endorse 
the way in which we society people spend so much 
of our time. While resting between dances I have 
often noticed others, and have been struck with the 
idea that their appearance was so lacking in dignity. 
I would be unable to control my laughter did not 
the whole thing seem so absurd, and even pitiful. 
To see a whole room full of grown up people 
whirling and whisking around in that way ! Why, 
if they had to work all night like that to accomplish 
something good and useful, what an outcry they 
would make!’* 


250 


In Primo. 


“But/' resumed Mrs. Phillips, “you know that if 
we are to have social gatherings at all, we must 
provide something that will amuse and entertain. 
Many young people have no taste for such enter- 
tainment as Miss Seymour seems to prefer. They 
are not conversationalists; neither do they enjoy 
hearing each other talk. I am afraid, without 
dancing, they would find social events rather 
dull." 

“Yes,” exclaimed Mr. Volt, “what are you going 
to do with those who only know enough to dance? 
By no means deprive them of the only amusement 
of which they are capable. Cards, as we have them 
now, were invented to amuse one of Europe’s 
imbecile kings, and think what a boon they have 
been to imbecility ever since! Why should not 
dancing serve the same purpose? No! Let them 
dance and play cards, for beyond this they are not 
worth a thought or an effort more than a lot of 
kittens. ’ ’ 

“No,” said Mr. Granby, speaking quite seriously, 
“every one is capable of being his best, and we 
should never rest satisfied until we have done our 
utmost to bring those with whom we come in con- 
tact up to their highest possibility.” 

“Do you not think,” inquired Mrs. York, “that 
when these amusements are indulged in with modera- 
tion, so far from being harmful, they may be really 
beneficial in many ways?” 

“There are so few who indulge moderately that 
I am unable to judge. From what I have been able 
to observe, those who dance at all, usually dance 
the season through.” 


In Prime. 


251 


“Of course, discretion and common sense must be 
used. “ 

“I do not question the wisdom of your remark. 
I only know that very few dancers use discretion. 
The trouble really lies back of this. It is largely a 
question of education, — or perhaps of miseduca- 
tion, — in many cases of no education. Most of the 
young people in society have, with great expendi- 
ture of money, time and effort, been fitted for this 
sort of life and little else; consequently, they know 
no other form of amusement or entertainment. 

“Others, forbidden to dance without having been 
given a reason that appeals to their better judg- 
ment, break through all restraint and recklessly 
plunge into a life of real dissipation ; while a still 
worse state of affairs is brought about, when, as not 
infrequently occurs, one of the parents, — too often, 
I fear, it is the mother, — assists the son or daughter 
in secretly attending such places against the direct 
commands of the other parent. Still others, whose 
attention has never been called to the evils that 
may result from indulging in this fascinating pas- 
time, simply dance because the rest do. 

“If, from the first, parents and teachers would lay 
the foundation of an education which trains the 
child towards the development of his best and 
greatest possibilities, there would be no trouble in 
satisfying the young with wholesome entertain- 
ment. ” 

“Oh,” broke in Mrs. French, “is it not better for 
people to dance than to spend their time gossip- 
ing?” 

“I was not aware,” retorted Mr. Volt, “that 


252 


In Primo. 


gossiping had been suggested as a substitute for 
dancing. I understood that healthy, intelligent 
amusement was the recommendation. Perhaps I am 
dull of comprehension. Does Mr. Granby really 
prefer gossiping to dancing?” 

“Can you explain to me what healthy, intelligent 
amusement is?” asked Mrs. French. 

“I doubt if I can,” was Mr. Volt’s dry reply; and 
then he continued: “Mr. Granby, the trouble is, 
you do not understand the aim and end of dancing. ’ ’ 

“Well,” I ventured, “I have often wondered why 
people go through so much real toil, and anxiety 
over many details, through an entire season. I am 
sure one season will be more than enough to satisfy 
me, for the rest of my life!” 

“Why, Miss Seymour,” exclaimed Mr. Volt, “you 
must be slow of comprehension! How else can 
people convince one another of their high social 
standing unless they can boast of an invitation to 
So-and-so’s ball? How can they make known their 
wealth and their artistic taste, if there are no ball- 
rooms where they can display their valuable gems 
and costly attire? And how, — oh, tell me how, — 
the clever, anxious, managing mammas can advertise 
the fact that they have marriageable daughters 
whom they are willing to dispose of to the highest 
bidder. And when so many are in the field they 
must each make an effort to outshine all rivals. 
Therefore, all this flattery, of which Miss Hamilton 
complains, is not only acceptable, but eagerly 
listened to by the vain darlings and the ambitious 
mammas. What are gentlemen to do when they 
know they are expected to make themselves agree- 


In Prime. 


253 


able in this way, and that their welcome within the 
charmed circle largely depends upon their skill in 
this direction?” 

Several of the older ladies exclaimed and demurred 
at Mr. Volt’s way of putting matters, but Mrs. 
Bristol argued: 

“Well, and what is wrong about parents desiring 
to make suitable settlements for their daughters? 
Your way of stating it is unfair. Were there no 
such things as balls and similar gatherings, how 
would you gentlemen ever meet, — or know of the 
existence of all the fair girls of New York? I am 
sure you seem very eager to avail yourselves of the 
opportunities thus afforded. What would you have? 
Shall we return to oriental customs where the young 
people are allowed no voice in such matters, and 
never meet until their wedding day?” 

“A gentleman always must own himself worsted 
in an argument with a lady. In this instance your 
triumph is most apparent, since young people in 
America are never allowed to meet except at 
balls. ’ ’ 

Mrs. Bristol made no reply to Mr. Volt’s rude 
remark, which was the nearest approach to anything 
like an expression of displeasure I had ever seen in 
her. Miss Hamilton broke the momentary silence 
by saying: 

“But to return to the question of the necessity of 
balls as we now have them. What is their purpose?’ ’ 

“They answer many ends,” explained Mrs. Phil- 
lips, “amusement, opportunities to make desirable 
acquaintances, exclusion of the undesirable (of 
course I do not approve of the public ball), contact 


254 


In Prime. 


with first society people, and advantages in many 
ways. ’ ’ 

“But, Mr. Granby,” persisted Miss Hamilton, 
“simply as an amusement, — like snow-balling, for 
instance, — do you think dancing necessarily wrong?” 

“Of course, any one knows that simply moving 
about to the time of music, — in itself, — can have no 
evil effect. Neither am I prepared to say that dancing 
might not be carried on harmlessly. As Miss 
Seymour said some time ago, one can understand 
how it could be enjoyed for an hour or so, to which 
I again reply that so few thus restrict themselves in 
dancing that, for myself, I am unable to judge what 
the results of such dancing might be. But the 
question that faces us is, why is the social atmos- 
phere of the ball-room what it is? Few amusements 
so easily lend themselves to evil, or can be so com- 
bined with what all moral people condemn, or at 
least consider questionable, as dancing. 

“I have only mentioned facts without going into 
causes, which every one can study for himself. As, 
perhaps, least among the causes that could be 
named, is the fostering and cultivation of vanity, 
rivalry and pride. In the train of these, as has 
been intimated, we shall find flattery, insincerity, 
and finally falsehood. With truth destroyed and 
conscience dulled, the flood-gate of moral destruc- 
tion is open. ’ ’ 

“I hope,” said Mrs. Bristol, “you do not judge us 
by these standards. ’ ’ 

Bowing towards us, Mr. Granby replied : 

“My presence as a guest in this company answers 
that question,” 


In Primo. 


255 


‘‘But do you think these results necessarily fol- 
low?” again inquired Miss Hamilton. 

“We are likely to be more or less affected by the 
influences with which we surround ourselves. The 
history of more than one generation is necessary to 
illustrate the truth of much that has been said 
to-day. But the reply to a single question may help 
you to answer your own inquiry. What noted men, 
who have accomplished great things, have been espe- 
cially fascinated by ball-room attractions?” 

After this Mrs. Bristol skillfully guided the con- 
versation into other channels; and as she managed 
to engage Mr. Granby’s attention during the 
remainder of the evening, we had no opportunity 
for talking over old plans. Upon taking his leave, 
Mr. Granby asked me what day I would be free to 
visit the art exhibition. I mentioned Monday 
afternoon, at which time, Mr. Granby said, we could 
consider the matters in which we were inter- 
ested. 

After her guests were gone, Mrs. Bristol referred 
to the discussion on dancing in a way that showed 
she considered they had taken an undue advantage 
of their privileges in thus disapproving of amuse- 
ments in which they knew their hostess participated. 
Her husband remarked: 

“I was engaged in conversation with the others, 
but from what I could hear and see, I concluded you 
had your hands full with Granby and Volt, and that 
Miss Seymour and Miss Hamilton were proving 
themselves enfants terrible, I was surprised that 
you let the conversation run on so long. I did my 
best to hold the attention of my immediate party 


256 


In Prime. 


lest the discussion become general. Why did you 
not exercise your prerogative as hostess and intro- 
duce a different topic?” 

“Well, had it been any one but Mr. Granby I 
would have done so, but I knew, of course, that he 
would understand such a maneuver, and I tolerated 
his unconventionality rather than run the risk of 
offending him. He can, if he chooses, bring us into 
touch with a class of people with whom I am most 
anxious to be on terms of intimacy. But I think 
Miss Seymour ought to have helped me instead of 
leading every one deeper into the discussion.” 

“I am sorry,” I returned, “if I have trespassed 
on forbidden ground; but I was so intensely in- 
terested that I never thought of your objecting to 
the subject. Pray pardon my offense. ” 

“Oh, never mind! Of course I was annoyed, — 
but it is of no great consequence, although I must 
confess it was a new experience for me. It is a pity 
you are so intense. Miss Seymour; if you could at 
least assume a more cool and dignified indifference, 
you would make society matters easier for yourself, 
and more comfortable for others.” 

I had never seen Mrs. Bristol so near manifesting 
impatience, and was greatly distressed. Indeed, 
the tears were too near the surface to permit my 
speaking. Seeing this, she laughed lightly, 
resumed her usual affable manner, and began 
speaking of something else. When bidding her good 
night, I said: 

“I am so sorry to disappoint or annoy you. You 
know, when I first came, I told you I thought I 
should not succeed in meeting your expectations.” 


In Primo. 


257 


Putting her arms around me, she kissed me, 
saying : 

“My dear child, do not trouble yourself about this 
a moment longer. The fact is, that although occa- 
sionally somewhat inconvenient, your unstudied 
frankness has a unique charm peculiar to yourself. 
I would not have you different in any way, — unless 
it might be to have you more ambitious about your 
own interests. “ 

“Oh, I am ambitious — only in a different way 
from what you mean.” 

I am more and more convinced that this sort of a 
life would trammel and handicap me in a way that 
would prevent freedom in living a consistent Chris- 
tian life. 


CHAPTER XXL 


Enough has been given in the preceding chapters 
of Julia’s journal to show the conclusions to which 
she came concerning dancing, and how she reached 
them. After the holidays she managed to avoid, to 
a certain extent, the many engagements that had 
hitherto claimed her entire time. By this means 
she obtained opportunity to study for herself, under 
the guidance of Mr. Granby, the poverty-stricken 
side of life in the great city. 

During her stay at Sunset Park, Julia had studied 
the various enterprises in which her money was 
invested, and not from books only, for later in the fall 
she made several short visits to the mills, factories, 
warehouses and mercantile establishments belong- 
ing to her. At these times she carried on her 
investigations, not only from a business standpoint, 
but from the position of one interested in the cir- 
cumstances and welfare of the employes. Before 
leaving the home of Mrs. Bristol, Julia formed sys- 
tematic plans for benefiting those in her service, 
which, later on, were developed and carried out. 
Of course she was not able, personally, to supervise 
this work. But about this time. Miss Kate Holmes, 
Mrs. Rodgers’ niece, became Julia’s special 
secretary. Among other things, during her first 
year in this work, Miss Kate made lists of those 
engaged in the various departments of business, 
and was instructed to keep herself informed 
258 


In Primo. 


259 


of all family events. When a new member entered 
the family of an employd, an express package 
came to the home containing everything by way of 
wardrobe, or other necessaries either mother or child 
could require. If a wedding was to take place, the 
bride received something for the home appropriate 
to the circumstances of the recipient. Was there 
sickness in a family, the daintiest of jellies and 
whatever could add to the comfort of the sufferer, 
or hasten his recovery, found its way to the sick 
room. When death entered a home, flowers were 
sent and a carriage waited upon the bereaved. 
Afterwards, a kind letter of sympathy was written, 
and if possible, the secretary arranged for some one 
to visit them personally, offering such comfort as 
they were prepared to receive. Books were also 
sent, and everything possible done that could in the 
least cheer them in their affliction. If a widow or 
orphan were left destitute, help was given until 
they could arrange for their own support. In short, 
every opportunity was utilized to bestow real benefit 
upon those in Julia’s employ, the greatest tact and 
delicacy being exercised to help them, but at the 
same time never to wound their self-respect. 
Great care and discrimination were used also, never 
to encourage a disposition to neglect either duty or 
careful economy because of expectation of such help. 
Where such attentions were inappropriate, Julia’s 
personal interest was manifested in some other 
way, so that all connected with her in business 
matters, came to consider her a real friend. 
Arrangements were also being perfected at this 
time for the establishment of libraries within easy 


26 o 


In Primo. 


access of the greater number of employes. A 
movement was also set on foot to provide Sunday 
services, and where the interest seemed to warrant 
it, to erect places of worship, in localities distant 
from churches. Ministers were to be stationed at 
such places, towards whose support the people so 
served would have the privilege of contributing as 
they were able. The people were consulted respect- 
ing their choice of denomination, for Julia was most 
liberal toward all evangelical churches, as was 
manifested by her frequent and sometimes large 
gifts to the different societies. 

Having completed these plans, the first of March 
Julia accepted an invitation to accompany Mrs. 
Clinton to the Pacific coast. Mrs. Rodgers remained 
behind to assist Miss Holmes. 

It is greatly to be regretted that space cannot be 
afforded for a few of the many letters Julia wrote 
me at this time, giving interesting accounts of her 
journey along the coast, as well as her beautiful 
word pictures of mountains, plains and valleys. 
She enjoyed these as only one of her capacity could. 

The months of July and August she spent 
exploring the great lakes from the western 
extremity of Superior to Niagara Falls, and thence 
to the mouth of the St. Lawrence river. Julia 
then took a trip to the Central Western states, and 
as she wended her way southward, gave me the 
pleasure of a short visit. October and November 
found her reveling in the beauty of the Southern 
states. 

While at San Francisco, Lord Riverton appeared 
upon the scene, but did not remain long, as he soon 


In Primo. 


261 


found that Julia declined to accept the offer of his 
title and heart; after which he found it more 
agreeable to continue his American travels alone. 

Returning to New York in December, Julia, with 
Mrs. Rodgers and Miss Holmes, took up her abode 
in her stately city mansion. As would be expected, 
Julia was as individual and unique in the manage- 
ment of her home, and in her attitude toward 
society, as she had been in everything else. 

With the familiarity of an intimate friend, Mrs. 
Bristol called before Julia and Mrs. Rodgers were 
fairly settled. After admiring the magnificence of 
the place and its appointments, she turned to Julia, 
and laughingly said: 

“But of what use is it all? You will never 
have any one here but grave philosophers, philan- 
thropists, and doctors of divinity, who will never 
notice their aesthetical surroundings. I suppose you 
will have an inscription over the entrance to the 
house, ‘None laugh who enter here!’ “ 

Julia laughed right merrily as she returned: 

“Come to our reception next week on Thursday, 
and see! By the way, I want to ask your advice 
about some matters. ’ ’ 

The next moment they were deep in discussion as 
to the arrangement of the rooms for the reception, 
considering questions of costume and other details 
connected with the coming event. When this was 
settled to their satisfaction, Julia said: 

“I give a reception to the city missionaries of all 
denominations on Tuesday evening, following this 
affair. I shall expect you to come and help me 
entertain them; you are to wear your prettiest. 


262 


In Primo. 


most becoming dress, and air all your charms and 
graces for their benefit. ’ ’ Mrs. Bristol made up a 
comical face of horror and despair. Anticipating 
her reply, before she could speak, Julia continued: 

“Oh, yes, you are coming, and you are going to 
behave your sweetest too ; so are Mrs. Clinton, and 
Mrs. Oliver, and ever so many more. The house 
will be full ! Oh, I assure you, it will be quite the 
fashion, so you need not hesitate!” 

Mrs. Bristol colored, but laughed good-naturedly, 
saying : 

“You are a naughty girl! Well, we will see about 
it.” 

She did come, — to both receptions, and contributed 
much to the success of the first and the enjoyment 
of the second. When leaving the latter, she 
whispered to Julia: 

“Really, dear, these missionary people are quite 
interesting. I had no idea they had so much life 
and animation.” 

“Have I not always told you that the merriest, 
gladdest people in the world are those whom you call 
‘such intense Christians’? And I am sure I do not 
know who has a better right to laugh heartily and 
joyously than ‘a child of the King.* ” 

“Well, perhaps I’ll join you sometime in your 
expeditions with them.” 

And she was as good as her word. Indeed, 
taking an active part in mission work became for a 
time something of a fad, not only with Mrs. Bristol, 
but with many other very fashionable ladies. About 
this time I received a letter from Julia, a part of 
which was as follows; 


In Primo. 


263 


New York, Dec. 20th, 18 — . — 

My dear Esther: — 

* * * 

Yes, Mrs. Bristol and 
her friends are manifesting their interest in the 
masses of New York in many helpful ways. But, 
oh, Esther! I feel that their hearts are not really in 
the work. So long as it is a popular thing to do, 
and influential people lead in the matter, they are 
willing to make it a fad ; but there are among us, 
too, certain ambitious women, who, just so long as 
it gives them prestige or influence, will contend for 
offices and power to control and direct affairs. But 
as soon as something new, be it what it may, 
receives attention from those whom they wish to 
follow, and whose approval they would make any 
effort to secure, they will drop out of this work and 
forget its existence. 

There are, however, ladies, who, like Mrs. 
Clinton, have taken a steady hold on these interests, 
and who will not be in the least affected by the 
popularity or prejudice the work may find among 
those I have mentioned. If there were only more 
like them! And what wonderful things could be 
achieved, if all who appear thus interested were 
only so indeed ! What a pity there are so few who 
are sincerely in earnest in their Christianity! 

Of course, this state of affairs obtains in all 
philanthropic and charitable organizations. How 
much to be deplored is the fact that in such work 
any one should be led by sinister motives ! But, as 
Mrs. Rodgers says, even those who are actuated by 
politic motives may be aroused to nobler living and 


264 


In Primo. 


to act from higher motives, through being brought 
in contact with the real needs of the world. 

Albert Cooper visited us the other day. I would 
not have believed he could improve so much in a 
year. He is quite manly in appearance and 
thought, — most of the boyishness of a year ago 
having disappeared ; but he retains the ingenuousness 
which will always be a part of his manhood. 

From Julia’s journal I will quote a few extracts: 

Jan. — , 18 — . — 

The ladies are still spending one 
day out of each week in city work. They give a 
great deal of attention to unimportant matters. To- 
day, after a lengthy and desultory discussion of 
matters having little relation to the work in hand, 
Mrs. Lee, one of the wealthy, earnest women 
present, said: 

“An hour from now I have an engagement at 

street, to look after the funeral of the mother of a 
large family of poor little children, two of whom are 
very ill with scarlet fever. I am very anxious to 
know what will be your decision about the question 
that came before us last week for consideration, 
namely, the establishment of a bureau of exchange for 
the benefit of men and women who are able to work, 
but cannot find employment. I know of at least 
twenty people who are out of work and who dread 
being obliged to accept charity. If the ladies will 
oblige me by laying these other matters on the 
table until this bureau can be settled, it will bring 
relief to many troubled people.’’ 


In Prime. 


265 


“Do you mean to say,” cried Mrs. French, “that 
you are going into a place infected with scarlet 
fever? Why do you not hire some one to go?” 

“I would have done that because of several 
women I know who would have been glad to earn 
the money. But I have found a great hindrance to 
our work in the belief of the people that, only those 
who are paid, or in some way receive their support 
for doing such work, are willing to undertake it. 
Just last week a man sneeringly asked: 

“ ‘Do you suppose one of your rich ladies would 
come near a family sick with scarlet fever?’ 

“ ‘Yes,’ I replied. Now I must make good my 
word. ’ ’ 

“Impudent fellow! They ought to be glad for 
help in any way.” 

“Well,” continued Mrs. Lee, “I am convinced that 
if we are to do these people any good, we must 
show them that our hearts are moved in their 
behalf ; that ours is not a cheap sort of sentimen- 
tality from which we derive a great deal of satisfac- 
tion, at very little cost to ourselves. When they see 
that we are ready to spend and be spent to do them 
good, we shall be able to make them understand and 
respect the missionaries and other agents we engage 
to do this work. But, ladies, I am waiting to learn 
what action you will take about the bureau of 
exchange. ’ ’ 

“Oh,” said Mrs. French, “I think we have quite 
enough on our hands now. Of course we enjoy 
having to do with charitable interests, but we do 
not want it to become such a burden that it will 
interfere with our personal interests and comfort. I 


266 


In Prime. 


am delighted with this idea of wearing a badge. 
And do you not think it will have a fine effect if we 
provide ourselves with black morocco-bound pocket 
Testaments, and engage in reading them while 
driving to business meetings or going to visit our 
districts?” 

Seeing there was likely to be a prolonged dis- 
cussion, I rose and stated that I would be personally 
responsible for the bureau, if the ladies would grant 
me permission to do so. They immediately elected 
me secretary of the bureau and Mrs. Lee departed 
on her errand of mercy. I know a number of ladies 
who will assist me with this work ; it will be a little 
difficult to get it started, that is all. 

Then Mrs. Russell, a grave, dignified, elderly lady, 
whose whole soul is in this work, rose, addressed 
the chair and said : 

‘T think, ladies, we should be more regular in our 
way of conducting these meetings. We waste much 
precious time, which I, for one, can ill afford, in 
desultory discussions of unimportant matters, and in 
rambling conversation. The dignity of the work 
demands, — and we owe it to ourselves, — that we 
keep its pressing and critical needs in view.” 

Miss Ford pouted a little over the more serious 
turn the conduct of the meeting had taken, and in 
an aside remarked : 

‘Tt is no fun to be so stiff. I would like things a 
little more social and informal.” 

What a pity there are so few earnest, consecrated 
women like Mrs. Lee and Mrs. Russell! It leaves 
such heavy burdens to be borne by the few, which 
could be carried so much more easily, and with 


In Prime. 


267 


more far reaching results, if all were deeply 
interested. Like the majority of those who are 
anxious to help, my hands are already full, and even 
with the assistance Mrs. Rodgers and Miss Holmes 
give me, — and the latter has a clerk, — I find it 
difficult to attend thoroughly to all I have under- 
taken. Mrs. Rodgers remonstrates with me con- 
tinually, because she thinks I am overdoing. But 
with so much need and trouble in the world, how 
can I help it? 

^ S|c * ^ 

And so the work went on. The destitute and 
helpless were not neglected; but what was even 
more important than this, was the work of assisting 
the discouraged ones, who, through no fault of their 
own, had become involved in difficulties, and in con- 
sequence thereof had been forsaken by most of the 
professed friends of more prosperous days ; but who, 
with a little timely aid, could easily extricate them- 
selves. 

The beautiful city home became a favorite resort 
for artists, musicians and literary people. Clergy- 
ment, philanthropists and those interested in the 
general welfare of the commonwealth were frequent 
visitors; educators, scientists, statesmen, lecturers 
and the better class of politicians often met there. 
Mr. Granby was, perhaps, Julia’s most frequent 
caller, as on his trips to New York he always spent 
as much time as he could spare, in her congenial 
home, and seemed greatly to enjoy its associations. 
Julia’s entertainments usually took the form of a 
musicale, a literary conversazione, or an occasional 
reception to such noted or promising persons as 


268 


In Primo. 


might be in the city. Also, from time to time, 
receptions were given to the Sunday-school teachers 
and other especial workers in the different churches. 
In all this she was nobly seconded, not only by Mrs. 
Rodgers, but by many other friends whose 
acquaintance she had made; even Mrs. Bristol 
added all she could towards helping Julia to carry 
out her wishes in these matters. The fashionable 
world did not avoid her; indeed, many of them 
declared that they received no invitations with more 
delightful anticipations than hers. 

However, as Mrs. Rodgers said, Julia was over- 
working. But she did so thoroughly enjoy this sort 
of activity that one had hardly the heart to raise 
much objection to her course. In one of her letters 
written to me she said : 

“Oh, blessed, blessed service! All for Jesus, all 
for the glory of God! Esther, I know now just 
what that good woman at Hampton means when 
she talks about ‘tying on little shoes for the glory 
of God.’ You remember how inclined I once was 
to be dissatisfied because I thought looking after 
business affairs, and seeing that my money was 
rightly used, would so consume my time that I would 
have little opportunity to do personal work. That 
feeling is all gone now, and I call it high honor to 
be permitted to do anything for Jesus. I am 
thankful to be allowed even to add up long columns 
of figures, and look over and sign business papers ; 
for since He gives it to me to do, this, too, is His 
service. I am just as conscious of God’s presence 
when doing this, as when praying with a dying man 
in some wretched tenement house. Besides, it is 


In Prime. 


a6g 


now clear to me, what I really always knew, that 
the money I inherit will do just as much good as any 
I might earn, if given in the same spirit.” 

The first of March, having arranged for the carry- 
ing forward of the work she had inaugurated, Julia 
and Mrs. Rodgers took a trip to Mexico. On their 
way they stopped at Fledding, and so insisted on 
my arranging for myself and family to spend the 
summer vacation months with them at some quiet 
and convenient place, that I promised to do so if 
possible. As usual, we consulted Mrs. Howard, 
who of course knew of just such a place as we 
wanted, and to our great delight, on our earnest 
insistence, decided to join us with a few of her 
friends. 


CHAPTER XXII. 


July— i8— 

Well, dear old journal, here we 
are! It seems too good to be true that Esther, her 
mother and sisters, Mr. and Mrs. Howard, Mrs. 
Rodgers, Miss Holmes and myself are all here 
together, in this roomy, beautiful country boarding 

house, nestled among the hills and woods of . 

Hammocks are scattered around the broad verandas 
and under the trees. Down in the corner of the 
large, welbkept, grassy lawn in front of the house, is 
a magnificent elm tree, underneath which are rustic 
seats, where two or more of our party can be found 
most of the time. 

To my surprise I found Mr. Granby here, whom I 
have not seen since last winter. He and his sister. 
Miss Isabelle Granby, have been here for a week. 
Their married sister, Mrs. Willard, is coming in a 
few days. Dr. Willard finds it difficult to leave his 
large practice, but we hope to have him with us a 
short time at least. 

July—, i8— .— 

Miss Granby and I took a long 
ramble in the woods to-day; we bid fair to become 
good friends. She is such a brilliant, beautiful girl, 
only two years younger than I am. She will finish 
her college course and then intends to do post- 
graduate work. How learned she must be ! I feel 
quite insignificant beside her. It makes me regret 
more than ever my lack of past opportunities. 

270 


In Prime. 


271 


Well, I can only make the best of such as I still 
have for reading and private study. 

Mr. Granby is a scholarly man, yet when I talk 
with him I do not feel embarrassed over my 
meager attainments. It seems very natural for him 
to explain to me things that I do not understand. 
Still, when I am alone and think it over, I know that 
when compared with Isabelle I must seem most 
deficient and unimproved. 

July—, 18—.— 

I am surprised to find how much 
selfishness remains in me. I compel myself to let 
Esther’s mother and sisters have her to themselves 
most of the time ; then, too, Mrs. Howard has some 
claim on her. Therefore, we have not had one hour 
of uninterrupted conversation. They are by no 
means an exclusive family; but not having seen 
Esther for three years, they naturally feel that they 
cannot let her out of their sight for a moment. 
Mrs. Berkely calls me “daughter Julia,’’ and likes 
to have me sit on a low stool at her feet with my 
head on her knee, while she smoothes my hair and 
tells me how much she loves me for my own sake, 
and because I was such a comfort to Esther for so 
many years. 

Esther is just her own dear self, looking at me 
and smiling the same as she always did. I wonder 
what she thinks of Mr. Granby ; they talk together 
a great deal at the table, and she seems to know as 
much as he does. 

No, they do not make me feel like an outsider, for 
they take me right into their happy circle. I am the 
exclusive one ; I have so much to tell Esther about 


272 


In Prime. 


that I have never written in my journal and that I 
cannot speak of before others. Oh, well, — my time 
will come when I can have her to myself long 
enough to tell her part of it anyway. 

July—, i8— 

Last evening the Rev. Mr. Gray, 
a friend of Mrs. Howard and Mr. Granby, came 
in on the late train. This morning he preached an 
earnest, good sermon, in the little country church 
about a mile from our boarding house. Mr. Gray 
being an Episcopal clergyman, he and the Berkelys 
became acquainted at once. He seems to enjoy talk- 
ing with Esther as much as we do. I am glad to see 
her mother and sisters so happy with her, and am 
gratified and delighted when eminent people 
appreciate her. But I do so want her to myself, just 
a little bit, as I used to have her at school. Yester- 
day Miss Holmes came also. Thinking she and 
Mrs. Rodgers would enjoy an opportunity to be 
alone with each other; and knowing that since Mr. 
Howard has to be in the city all of the week, he and 
Mrs. Howard consider the hours they have together 
very precious, I have remained in my room nearly 
all day. 

Late this afternoon I went down into the parlor 
and found Mr. Gray and the Granby party there. 
Hoping to learn more of such matters, I listened 
while they talked about the increasing poverty in 
great cities, and of the need of missionaries to teach 
the people. Miss Isabelle said many bright, 
opportune things. Finally Mr. Granby turned to 
me, saying: 

“Miss Seymour is greatly interested in all good 


In Primo. 


273 


works. Perhaps you and she can devise some plan 
for the betterment of these conditions.” 

Mr. Gray turned eagerly, and said : 

“Yes, I have heard something of Miss Seymour’s 
work, and have come to the conclusion that she 
realizes how much is needed besides money. We 
need more men and women who are ready to go, 
with loving hearts, right in among the poor, miser- 
able people, and teach them personally. If rich peo- 
ple would only show their love by their presence as 
well as by their contributions, the needy ones would 
believe in their sincerity, and would no longer think 
they have reason to feel that only those who need 
the support given them for doing so, will come to 
their relief. ’ ’ 

“I think,” responded Mr. Granby, “that Miss 
Seymour is one who both works and contributes.” 

“Then she belongs to a class that has great 
influence for good. Granby, what you said to me a 
few months ago in the city, is true. Too many rich 
people are excusing themselves from doing their 
whole duty because they give money, which, with 
their abundance, is no sacriflce on their part. Also, 
too many poor people are spending their time 
lamenting because they have little or no money to 
contribute, and so give nothing.” 

“I think, Mr. Gray, you can go a step further and 
say that the majority of people who would have you 
think them generous, and greatly interested in every 
benevolence, are simply quieting their consciences 
by expressing beautiful sentiments, — or in other 
words, satisfying themselves with talking instead of 
doing. 


274 


In Prime. 


“This is, to a greater or less extent, true of all 
philanthropic and reformatory work. As you 
know, I have been somewhat engaged in temper- 
ance work, but am beginning to feel discouraged and 
disgusted. I find that where you can succeed in 
popularizing temperance, you can obtain a sort of 
success, but it is very temporary indeed. The next 
new interest or excitement that comes along, 
attracts the attention of the people, — meantime, the 
saloon has an easy triumph!” 

“What is the reason of this? It can hardly be 
on account of ignorance, for there seems to be 
a great deal of lecturing and teaching on the 
subject.” 

“No, it is because the temperance people are not 
in earnest. They would rather temperance pre- 
vailed, but when you get right down to the root of 
the difficulty, there are few who will sacrifice any 
personal interest for their principles. We have a 
deal of talking about ‘Vote as you pray,’ but even 
the man who only does this has come far short of 
his duty. ’ ’ 

“I,” said Mr. Gray, “have had little connection 
with the present so-called temperance movement, 
further than to preach against intemperance as a 
sin; to deal personally with individuals along the 
line of urging each man to vote according to his con- 
victions ; and in attempting to reclaim drunkards. 
Hence, I do not know much about the difficulties 
you specialists have to meet.” 

“Oh, I am not a specialist. Yet I am often 
invited to give temperance lectures, and to help 
organize various leagues. The chief difficulty, I 


In Primo. 


275 


find, is to discover any moral backbone in the so- 
called temperance people.” 

“You generalize; tell me some particulars, so I 
may understand exactly what you mean.” 

“Well, for example, here is a place in which local 
option is before the people. I am speaking of the 
towns now, — not the large cities. One third of the 
voters are church-members, who can generally be 
depended upon to vote for no saloon ; and the same 
can be said of many who are not professing Chris- 
tians. But a great majority of the business men, 
who may be total abstainers personally, will tell you 
that it is to their interest financially to have licensed 
saloons in the place. They say that the saloon tax 
pays for the sidewalks, street lamps and other neces- 
saries, thus lessening the general property tax. They 
also claim that people who would otherwise go to 
more distant towns to sell their produce, and make 
their purchases, trade here when there is a saloon in 
the place, thus benefiting business and the town.” 

“Undoubtedly! And these voters are joined by 
those in the community who patronize the saloon, 
thus forming a majority. But what more can tem- 
perance people do? They are simply outnumbered, 
and, as a minority, must submit.” 

“If they were in downright earnest, — if they would 
take the trouble, — the}^’ could do a great deal. For 
one thing, they could soon prove to business men 
that it is the total abstainer who supports trade, and 
not the man who frequents saloons. The latter 
spends his money in the saloon, for he cannot get 
whisky without paying for it. But when he comes 
to the merchant, the doctor, Che lawyer or the 




In Prime. 


blacksmith, he has his purchases, or the services he 
has received charged to his account. We all know 
how much a drunkard’s promise to pay is worth. 
And were it otherwise, such a man has little left to 
spend on his family. ’ ’ 

“How would you make this clear to business 
men?” 

“By not dealing with those who are known to vote 
for licensing the saloon. This would prove a much 
greater power than mere voting, and can be 
exercised by every man, woman and child. 

“Some say give woman the ballot. But the man 
who votes for the saloon would not tolerate his 
wife’s voting against his wishes! 

“Others say ‘Agitate! Create public sentiment!’ 
There has been no lack of this. Have results been 
satisfactory? 

“Still others argue, ‘Legislation is the remedy!’ 
I ask, what is the use of further legislation, when 
we are powerless to enforce the laws we have? 

“But by simply looking upon the saloon supporter 
as a dishonored man, with whom respectable people 
can have nothing to do in either a social or a 
business way, the Church and the various temper- 
ance organizations could do away with the liquor 
traffic in six months, even if none of them could 
vote ; and this, too, without a direct appeal to law or 
politics. 

“It looks as if our temperance people enjoy hear- 
ing their own voices more than doing commonplace, 
obscure work, — or making personal sacrifices, — such 
as not having meat for dinner, or taking the trouble 
to go to another town to find a true temperance 


In Primo. 


277 


blacksmith. Oh, no! That sort of thing will not 
send their names echoing down the twentieth 
century as apostles of temperance, as they fancy 
their talking may do. 

“I have come to the conclusion that many talk 
temperance because it is easy and costs nothing; 
but they are not to be depended upon. Observa- 
tion has taught me that people may pray long and 
loud, but the saloon keepers are not a bit afraid, so 
long as the prayers stay in the church and do noth- 
ing else. Many, too, will vote as they pray, but the 
saloon keepers care nothing for their voting so long 
as the saloon secures a majority, which, as things 
are, it is not difficult to do. It is ‘the doing some- 
thing’ on the part of temperance people that stirs 
up the wrath of the liquor men. 

“But call on your temperance folks to sacrifice 
their comfort or convenience, their time or their 
money, and you will find out how strong their 
temperance principles are. ’ ’ 

“On the same principle,” said Mr. Gray, “that 
when a few really earnest temperance people under- 
take to enforce the laws that saloon keepers violate, 
every saloon keeper and brewer in the country is 
taxed for funds to aid the prosecuted saloon keeper 
in defending himself; but it will be found that 
few, if any, will come forward to help the temper- 
ance men who are trying to enforce the law. No, 
sir! They will stand back and say, ‘They ought to 
have known better than to try to fight the saloon in 
the courts. ’ 

“The men who have undertaken to carry the suit 
through the courts, may be defeated, and in turn 


278 


In Primo. 


prosecuted and ruined, — perhaps imprisoned; and 
the mass of so-called temperance people who talk, 
vote and pray for ‘no saloon,’ will give themselves 
no concern about the matter, further than to bewail 
the liquor power; whereas, they ought to bewail 
their lack of loyalty to the cause they have 
espoused.” 

“You think,” asked Isabelle, “that temperance 
men ought to guard the morals of the people, pro- 
tect themselves against the danger of the saloon, and 
stand by each other as stanchly as the whisky men 
defend and protect their interests, and stand by each 
other?” 

“I think that real temperance men not only 
ought, but will do so. The trouble is, we have 
very few conscientious temperance men. I see 
obstacles are much the same as they used to be 
when I gave temperance lectures a few years ago. 
I now refuse all such calls, and tell those who 
invite me to speak, that when professed temperance 
people show me reason to believe that they are 
honest in their professions of temperance principles 
by doing what they can themselves, I am ready to 
help in every way I can, — but not until then. 
Hence, I have been devoting my time to persuading 
men to become out-and-out Christians; that 
accomplished, their temperance principles are likely 
to be correct. ” 

Just then a young man, who came in late last 
night, and who had been sitting in the room during 
part of the conversation, but with whom none of us 
are acquainted, said : 

“Mr. Granby, you speak of refusing to trade with 


In Prime. 


279 


those who vote for saloons. Is not that equal to 
bribing them to vote for temperance?” 

“No, sir. In this country ever}^ man is allowed 
his preference with regard to those with whom he 
wishes to associate or deal, and can select those who 
are most congenial and most in harmony with him- 
self and his interests. It is surprising that tem- 
perance people do not more generally prefer to 
associate and deal with each other. ’ ’ 

“I must admit your principle to be correct; but 
do you not think such methods more likely to 
embitter men, and confirm them in a determination 
to continue their course, when patience and for- 
bearance would probably lead them to adopt your 
views?” 

“This forbearance has been shown them, and 
they have abused it. When men are utterly 
indifferent to the welfare of humanity, so long as 
their gains are not interfered with, ‘patience ceases 
to be a virtue.’ 

“Moreover, these men know the right and wrong 
in these matters. All this talk has, at least, 
accomplished that, and their continued course in 
wrong-doing is a forcible answer to those who 
maintain that education is a cure for the evil. It 
proves conclusive!}^ that education, in itself, is 
‘a savor of life unto life or of death unto death.’ 
And we are glad to concede that the talking has 
brought about a few personal reforms. That this is 
not more generally true is the cause of my 
dissatisfaction. 

“But as far as effecting any thing along the line of 
protection and defense is concerned, very little has 


28 o 


In Primo. 


been accomplished. The trouble with these busi- 
ness men, who favor the saloon, is that they have no 
principle. They vote as they do, simply to promote 
their own selfish interests. It is personal character 
with which we have to deal. One of two things must 
be done ; either a man must be moved by his con- 
science, or he must be made to feel that his evil 
conduct is disastrous to his interests. In the latter 
case, the permanence of his reform is doubtful. He 
stands in the position of one who is a criminal at 
heart, whose neighbor has cause to regard him as an 
enemy, — ready to injure him to any extent, if he 
thinks it is to his interest to do so. Would that 
neighbor trade with such a man? No, sir. 

“When men think as much of the morals of their 
own and their neighbors’ families, as they do of 
their property, there will be more action and less 
talk. * ’ 

“These are not parallel cases.” 

“No, sir, they are not. It is impossible to draw 
a case that will parallel in atrociousness that of the 
man who, by vote and influence, places in the path 
of the young in any community such a pitfall of 
destruction as the saloon. Murder does not com- 
pare with the heinousness of ruining the character 
of a young man, and sending him out a wreck, soul 
and body, to pollute and degrade all with whom he 
may come in contact. 

“How a Christian man or woman, in these days 
of enlightenment, can shun the saloon keeper and at 
the same time continue to deal with the man who 
voted to license his saloon, or continue to recognize 
him as a decent man and a friend, I cannot com- 


In Primo. 


281 


prehend. I am really forced to the conclusion that 
such persons are neither sincere Christians nor 
earnest temperance people. Certainly, a consistent, 
conscientious man or woman would abstain from 
the use of any article, rather than buy from one 
who is a deadly enemy, and who, for the sake of 
financial gain in mere dollars, deliberately helps to 
place in the way of their boys, or their neighbor’s 
boys, that which aims directly at their ruin.” 

“Well, how are these people to be roused and 
brought to do their duty?” 

“Now you have touched the root of the difficulty. 
I know of nothing but genuine Christian experience 
that does that. And I care not what profession a 
man makes, if his Christianity does not help him to 
do right in this matter, I have no faith in his pro- 
fession. As Mr. Gray intimates, dealing with the 
individual is the important work. However, I 
would not have our efforts confined to this. There- 
fore, when invited to give a temperance address, I 
go, and tell the people what I believe to be the 
plain truth, namely, that if people want to do away 
with the saloon so much as they say they do, let them 
begin to do as well as to talk, I tell them I have 
no objection to their talking as much as they please, 
— some talk is of course necessary, — provided they 
speak the truth ; but that I am tired of hearing men 
and women prate when I know they are doing 
nothing. ’ ’ 

“Well, supposing your method to be right, do you 
think it practicable? If you refuse to deal with 
those who vote for licensing the saloon, with whom 
will you deal? Would it not result in temperance 


282 


In Primo. 


men being obliged to close up business, and in most 
cases, cause so much inconvenience that home life 
would be unbearable? It is easy to suggest these 
things, but we must remember that if temperance 
people refuse to trade with these men, they in turn 
can refuse to trade with temperance people, and 
thus easily crush them financially. ’ ’ 

“What you say is true because so few temperance 
voters and their families can be relied upon to stand 
by the cause. You bring us right back to where 
we started; if the temperance voters, who are the 
ones that support trade, would take the trouble to 
combine, and prove faithful to each other, they could 
win their cause. The opposite party does this most 
effectively, because it is to their interest financially to 
do so. But temperance men suppose their interests to 
lie in another direction, and cowardice, selfishness, or 
lack of honest principle prevents them from doing 
anything effective. So long as this is so, they can 
accomplish nothing through agitation, legislation, 
voting, or even education, unless it may be to gain a 
few spasmodic and very temporary victories, which 
they relinquish the moment they are likely to lose 
anything in popularity, convenience or money. 
The responsibility of failure rests on temperance 
people themselves.” 

The announcement that dinner was ready broke 
up the discussion. As we passed out to the dining- 
room, Mr. Granby said to me : 

“I suppose, Miss Seymour, you think me a very 
rabid temperance man.” 

“Oh, no, only very much in earnest and tired of 
half-hearted people and half-way measures.” 


In Prime. 


283 


“Yes, you have understood me.” 

“But, Mr. Granby, I have been wondering how a 
person who believes in radical measures as you do, 
can act consistently with his views. You may find 
many who agree with you in theory, but I fancy 
there are few who are strong and courageous 
enough to carry out their belief. Standing 
practically alone, how do you manage to live up to 
your theories?” 

“Now, Miss Seymour, you have touched upon a 
perplexing and painful subject. I do not advocate 
nor engage in much discussion on this subject with 
such business men as we have been speaking of. If 
the method I mentioned could be quietly and gener- 
ally carried out, the work would be quickly accom- 
plished with little confusion or difficulty. ‘Less 
noise, more work,’ is my motto. ” 

“After all, Mr. Granby, is it not, as you have 
already intimated, really a question of being a 
loyal Christian, whose consecration means ‘Obey God 
at all hazards and leave results with Him’? ” 

“Nothing less than that, and the lack of such con- 
secration, and that only, delays the coming of the 
Christ. It is an individual matter — each one who 
meets this condition helps the coming of the 
Kingdom ; and all who fail to do so, retard it. ’ ’ 

Here the conversation became general^ and after 
dinner I returned to my room. In a short time 
Mrs. Rodgers and Kate joined me. Mrs. Rodgers 
asked if I felt she had deserted me. I must have 
smiled in rather a disconsolate way, for she said: 

“I went to call you to our room, but found you 
had joined the party in the parlor, where you 


284 


In Prime. 


seemed to be enjoying yourself; and Mr. Granby 
seems so happy in your society that I would not 
interrupt you. ’ ’ 

“Yes, and he always makes the conversation very 
interesting,” I replied, and then I told them of our 
discussion. After this we went down to the parlor, 
where all the inmates of the house had gathered for 
some singing before we separated for the night. 


CHAPTER XXIII. 


July—, i8— 

This afternoon, Mr. Granby’s 
sister, Mrs. Willard, came. She has the daintiest, 
most perfect physique I ever saw. She has a very 
delicate complexion, light brown hair and the 
bluest blue eyes! Mrs. Willard can wear any color, 
but looks best in pale pink, as it seems to give her a 
little more color. Without the least apparent effort, 
her manner is most perfect and graceful ; in her, 
awkwardness or hesitation would be impossible. 
But Mrs. Willard’s greatest charm lies in her social 
power. Beautiful, gentle little lady that she is, in 
her unobtrusive way she takes her place as leader 
as naturally as she smiles or speaks; she makes 
every one feel at ease and calls out the best in those 
with whom she associates. Even Mrs. Howard, 
with an added queenliness, falls in with the current 
of Mrs. Willard’s influence, and her so doing only 
emphasizes her own brilliancy of intellect and 
accomplishment, as even Esther had not imagined 
possible. 

I am startled about Esther ! From the first it was 
apparent that Mr. Gray especially enjoyed talking 
to her, and had a way of finding a place at her side, 
— but this did not surprise me, — who does not 
admire Esther? It has given me great satisfaction 
to see how she is appreciated here. However, it 
has begun to dawn upon me that Esther is not 
285 


286 


In Prime. 


altogether indifferent to Mr. Gray. It is becoming 
quite apparent that she is well content to listen to 
accounts of his work, and her face glows with a 
great interest when he tells of the wide opportuni- 
ties in connection with his mission. 

I am afraid I should not be quite pleased if any- 
thing serious came of this. Of course, I desire her 
highest happiness and good, but I have always been 
so ambitious for Esther, — I should be dreadfully 
disappointed in case she should enter into a lifelong 
co-partnership with Mr. Gray in his missionary 
work amid such uncongenial surroundings. I have 
so wanted her in a position where her endowments 
should have no limitations set to them. I do not 
forget her spiritual needs, — but I know that her 
supplies are boundless, and she does not fail to avail 
herself of them. I must remember, however, that 
He who thus provides for her spiritual needs will 
provide all else that is necessar)^ — all this has been 
in my thought for Esther. Oh, what have I not 
planned for her ! 

July—, i8— 

To-day I received a telegram telling 
me of Mr. Markham’s sudden death from heart 
disease. This is sad news, for I have come to look 
upon Mr. Markham as a kind and faithful friend. I 
start immediately for the city, Mrs. Rodgers and 
Kate accompanying me. 

% * 4: 4c 4c 4« * 

July — , i8— 

We returned from the city last 
evening. This is the first time since I was a child 


In Primo. 


287 


that I have been called to mourn the loss of a friend ; 
and I do mourn for Mr. Markham. 

Yesterday I asked Mrs. Markham if it would dis- 
tress her too much to talk with me a few minutes. 
She said no, so I took the liberty to inquire if her 
husband had left his affairs so that she and her two 
daughters could live in comfort, without undue 
anxiety. She told me that Mr. Markham had for 
some time anticipated dying thus suddenly, and had 
made all necessary provision for his family. In his 
quiet way, Mr. Markham has been an earnest, 
faithful Christian, and we can rejoice in the hope 
of knowing him in the life beyond. 

I summoned Mr. Thurston to meet me in New 
York to arrange my business affairs and get them 
in order to place in the hands of a new agent. I 
fear I shall not be able to find another like Mr. 
Markham. 

Last Saturday, while we were away, Esther’s 
brothers came ; so now we are a large company, and 
every one seems happy but myself. Richard 
Berkely is a fine looking young man. How queer 
everything is ! He and Kate have struck up a great 
friendship. They like the same books; they have 
the same taste in art, although each seems to get 
different thoughts from pictures and sculpture. 
I was with them to-day, under the shade of the elm 
tree, but not being in a mood to talk, I listened to 
the conversation they seemed to enjoy so much. 

July—, 18—.— 

This evening, Mrs. Rodgers, who 
is slow to remark upon such matters, said to 
me: 


288 


In Prime. 


“My dear, I think you may have a successful 
rival in Mr. Gray. * ' 

At the moment, the thought of my beautiful, 
queenly Esther being buried in the dark, loathsome 
slums of New York, was most unbearable, and I 
said something to that effect to Mrs. Rodgers, to 
which she replied: 

“But last winter you spent a great deal of your 
time there, and seemed to enjoy it, although many 
felt you were fitted for what they believed a more 
important sphere, and that you were inconsiderate 
in thus depriving them of your society.” 

“Oh, that was different.” 

“How different?” 

“Oh, — you understand, — I am not like Esther. I 
could not fill such places as she could. Think of her 
bearing and beauty, her exquisite taste and accom- 
plishments, her capabilities and talents. ” 

“Julia, do you think anything is too precious or 
too excellent to be used in God’s service? Should 
we not give Him our best? You used to complain 
because you could do so little that cost you any- 
thing. Here is an opportunity to prove how deeply 
in earnest you were. Can you not, without any 
consideration of self, or of any desire or hope you 
may have entertained, willingly, gladly, and without 
stint, give up your friend, who is your dearest 
possession, to the Master, for this work, if He wants 
her?” 

“What a hard test has been given me! My 
Esther to spend her life upon those poor, degraded 
people who cannot appreciate her.” 

“In God’s sight these poor, miserable ones are as 


In Prime. 


289 


precious as those among whom you would place 
Esther. Think a moment, — if you were one of 
these, so starved and distressed, so vile, soul and 
body, do you not think a beautiful, gifted woman 
like your Esther would be much more likely to have 
power to uplift you, than one who was not so 
endowed?” 

“Yes, Mrs. Rodgers, I am sure she would.” 

“Now, let us suppose that Julia Seymour is a 
child in one of those squalid places, which are the 
only homes these poor people know anything about. 
She has never slept in a clean, comfortable bed, nor 
had a decent dress ; her hair has never been combed, 
nor her body bathed ; she has never had other than 
stale food, and of that an insufficient quantity. 
Drunkenness and brawling are every-day occur- 
rences in the family in which she is so unfortunate 
as to have been born. Whom shall we send after 
her?” 

“Oh, Mrs. Rodgers! What a terrible picture!” 

“Whom shall we send?” 

“I am sure I would want Esther to come to me. 
It was she who did come to me, lighted the monot- 
onous, cheerless life in which she found me, and 
saved me from sinking into discouragement and 
lethargy.” 

“One thought more. Our Savior, our infinite 
Savior, the adored of Heaven, left His exalted 
throne and came away down to the most fallen of 
men and women ; dwelt among them, was despised, 
reviled and crucified by them. For what purpose? 
That He might save them, ‘For God so loved the 
world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that 


290 


In Priino. 


whosoever believeth on him should not perish, but 
have everlasting life. ' 

‘Was it for crimes that I have done, 

He groaned upon the tree? 

Amazing pity, grace unknown, 

And love beyond degree!’ 

“When we think of this great offering, how little 
seems the greatest sacrifice that we can make ; even 
when we devote to His service those we love most ! 
Since He, with all His infinite goodness, power and 
wisdom, condescended to make this sacrifice for us, 
can we say that anything is too valuable, or too 
excellent, to be spent in the work which our Savior 
inaugurated and Himself did? Must we not cry out: 

‘I sink, by dying love compelled. 

And own Thee conqueror?’ ” 

“I am overcoming, Mrs. Rodgers, I am over- 
coming through Christ’s all-conquering love.” 

“ ‘Weighed in the balance, you will not be found 
wanting.’ Good night, my dear.” 

“Wait, Mrs. Rodgers, wait a moment, please. 
There is more I want to talk with you about. ’ ’ 

“About yourself, my dear?” 

“No, only as Esther and my love for her are a 
part of myself. But Mr. Gray, — do you think he is 
the right one? I can give Esther up to God, but I 
am not sure that I want her to marry Mr. Gray. ’ ’ 

“Yes, Julia, to me they seem well adapted to each 
other. Mr. Gray is certainly Esther’s equal in 
intellect and culture. You have heard him preach; 
as you know, he makes no attempt at display, but 
you must have noticed his choice language and 
power over words, as well as his logical arguments ; 


In Primo. 


291 

while his fervor and earnestness carry his congrega- 
tion with him at every point. 

“As to his family, he is as well connected as 
Esther. While his friends made no objection to his 
becoming a clergyman, about his engaging in city 
mission work they feel somewhat as you do about 
Esther ; he enters upon it without their sympathy, 
approval or support. 

“He is now serving an aristocratic church, which 
almost idolizes its gifted pastor. They are willing 
Mr. Gray should continue here, and as is now his 
practice, spend some of his time visiting among the 
poor people of New York; but devoting his life to 
the work they consider a great mistake. 

“Mr. Gray is an intimate friend of Mr. Granby, 
whom you know well enough to understand that 
there must be something unusual about the man he 
would receive as such. ’ ’ 

“Thank you, Mrs. Rodgers, you have been very 
kind to me. “ 

July—, 18—.— 

I slept very little last night and 
have had headache all day. So many things 
trouble me that I have no longer any peace of 
mind. I am sorry I came here, and would go away 
if I could do so without disturbing other people and 
breaking up their plans. 

Since my talk with Mrs. Rodgers I have been 
taking more particular notice of Mr. Gray. He 
really has a fine, strong face. No, I cannot find 
fault with his appearance, and knowing what Mrs. 
Rodgers has told me, I cannot feel that he is 
unworthy of Esther. 


292 


In Prime. 


July — , i8— 

This morning Mrs. Rodgers asked 
me if I had thought of any one to act as agent in look- 
ing after business matters, and when I told her that as 
yet, I did not know of any one available, she suggested 
Edward Berkely. She said it was true he was 
young, but he seemed a man of sound judgment, 
and it would be a great advantage to secure an 
agent of whose honesty there could be no doubt. I 
was delighted with the idea, and seized the first 
opportunity to speak to him about it. The glad 
light that came over his countenance was in a 
moment overshadowed by a look of regret, as he 
replied : 

“I cannot tell you how much I wish I were able to 
accept the position you offer me ; it would be much 
more to my taste than standing behind a counter as 
I now do, but I have had no experience that would 
fit me for such responsibility. I appreciate the con- 
fidence you repose in me, but I cannot con- 
scientiously undertake what you ask me to do.” 

I hunted up Esther and appealed to her, but found 
that she, too, was doubtful as to the wisdom of my 
proposition. However, she said she would lay the 
case before her mother. I called Mrs. Rodgers, and 
going to Mrs. Berkely ’s room we proceeded to con- 
sider the advisability of the undertaking. 

Mrs. Rodgers insisted that Edward had more 
ability than they gave him credit for; I explained 
that Mr. Thurston understood matters thoroughly, 
and would help Edward; while I should continue 
my supervision, whoever had charge of the business. 

Finally, it was settled that Edward would look 


In Primo. 


293 


after matters for me until I could find some one 
better qualified for the place. 

The increased salary will enable Edward to spend 
what leisure he may have in reading law; and I 
shall ask Mr. Thurston to assist him in every way 
he can. 

July—, 18—.— 

This evening, after dinner, Mrs. 
Howard called me to her room, and motioning me 
to a seat on a stool near her feet, drew my head on 
her lap, stroked my hair, kissed me and said : 

“Julia, dear, something troubles you; will you 
not tell me what it is?” 

I hesitated a moment, for the tears were ready to 
start, and then replied : 

“I have had some trouble with myself about 
Esther and Mr. Gray; but it is over now, — only I 
think so much about it, — and other things, — that 
sometimes I cannot sleep well.” 

“Do you not think you are rather premature in 
thus settling Esther’s affairs? Mr. Gray has been 
here such a short time they have hardly become 
acquainted. ’ ’ 

“I have thought about it almost from the first. 
It came to me with the power of a conviction. I 
talked with Mrs. Rodgers about it; she, too, has 
seen it from the beginning. ” 

“I think myself that Mr. Gray and Esther are 
favorably impressed with each other, but it does 
not necessarily follow that they will be married. ’ ’ 

“I believe they will?” 

“Be that as it may, do not worry over it.” 

“No, I got the better of myself a few days ago, 


294 


In Prime. 


and if it is best for Esther to marry Mr. Gray I am 
determined to be happy over it.” 

“Julia, if you will allow me, I am going to 
exercise a great privilege, — may I ask if you care 
for Mr. Gray yourself?” 

In amazement I sprang to my feet and stood look- 
ing at her, utterly unable to speak. 

“Well, my dear, I hope you are not angry with 
me?” 

“Angry! — No! But whatever put such a thought 
into your mind?” 

“Don’t look so frightened,” she said, laughing, 
“I simply could not understand why you should 
worry yourself sick over Mr. Gray and Esther, 
unless the matter in some way touched you, per- 
sonally.” 

“Then you had not thought of it before I 
mentioned them ? ” 

“I assure you I had not.” 

“Oh, I am much relieved,” and I sank down again 
upon the stool. “I was frightened lest you and 
others had misunderstood my attempts to be 
especially friendly with Mr. Gray ; for I have found 
it hard to forgive him for coming between Esther 
and myself.” 

“What an intense little thing it is! But you do 
not mean to tell me you would not be glad of any- 
thing that would add to Esther’s happiness?” 

“Oh, it is not that!” Then I told her about my 
talk with Mrs. Rodgers. 

“Well, since you are in this frame of mind, I will 
talk to you on a subject more in harmony with your 
thoughts than what I was going to say. ’ ’ 


In Prime. 


295 


‘‘Oh, no, talk to me about both.’' 

“No, you have had excitement enough for one 
evening. My other subject will keep until you are 
more composed, for it is a matter on which I want 
your very best judgment.” 

“Very well then, for I could not give a sensible 
opinion on anything to-night.” 

“I will tell you of some of Mr. Gray’s desires con- 
cerning his chosen work. He has no thought of my 
seeking help for him in carrying out his ideas, so 
you must not suppose that I am his agent in the 
matter. Since you are a Methodist, I do not sup- 
pose it ever occurred to Mr. Gray that you would be 
likely to interest yourself in his undertakings. He 
does not know you so well as I do. ’ ’ 

“What are his plans?” 

“I do not know all his plans; but he wants to carry 
on a mission in one of the most neglected por- 
tions of New York. It is not his wish to make it a 
charitable institution altogether, — but rather to 
teach the people to help themselves. Mr. Gray 
wants to build a large church or chapel, having 
lecture rooms and Sunday-school rooms. He has 
been trying day-schools on a small scale, but finds 
that many of the children he hoped to benefit are 
kept at home to care for those younger, while the 
mothers go out to their daily work, washing, 
scrubbing, or toiling all day in the sweat shops. So 
Mr. Gray plans to erect a school building containing, 
in addition to the ordinary educational department, 
an industrial school for girls, one for manual 
training for boys, a kindergarten school and play- 
rooms, dining-room and nursery. Here the children 


296 


In Prime. 


could be taught and their dinners given them, for 
which those old enough to do so, would be required 
to work a short time daily; and the babies taken 
care of, thus leaving their mothers free to attend to 
their work.” 

“Yes, from what I have seen among these 
people, I understand the utility of all this.” 

“Mr. Gray also desires to build a comfortable 
home for the missionary to live in — by the way, I 
never heard him mention the need of a home until 
he came here ; perhaps he is thinking what would 
be necessary if such a woman as Esther were to be 
mistress of it. That would be in accord with your 
opinion as to what is to be the outcome of affairs.” 

“Oh, Mrs. Howard! I see some splendid possi- 
bilities, — but go on, please.” 

“I have heard Mr. Gray speak, too, of having 
work-shops and wood-yards, where people who are 
out of work can earn their board and lodging until 
steady employment can be found for them. To 
make this possible, a building suitable as a boarding 
house for the laborers will be required. ’ ’ 

“His plans are quite extensive. Nevertheless, I 
can see my v/ay to help him, in any case; but if 
Esther is to be connected with such a mission, how 
especially I would enjoy putting things into shape!” 

“You must remember it will cost a great deal of 
money; as Mr. Gray will manage it, it will branch 
out, and can be limited only by a lack of consecrated 
workers and means to support it. ’ ’ 

“I would be glad to help inaugurate the work, at 
least, and this I am able to do. If Esther and Mr. 
Gray stand at the head of it, I can make careful 


In Prime. 


297 


calculations, and after a year or two, endow the 
work so as to guarantee it a moderate support. I 
shall ask Mr. Gray not to make it known that I am 
back of the undertaking, financially, and probably 
my contributions will be duplicated by his many 
friends.” 

“All this you must arrange with Mr. Gray. 
Think it over carefully and pray for direction so 
you may be sure what is just the right thing to do. 
Do not let your enthusiasm and your love for 
Esther outrun your common sense, nor cause you to 
forget your duties in other directions. ’ ’ 

“Mrs Howard, I am beginning to understand 
what people mean when they talk about cross bear- 
ing. Hitherto, I have found it such a pleasure to 
do whatever I could to help make the world better, 
that I could not understand what people mean when 
they call Christian work and giving, cross bearing. 
Now, however, that duty runs somewhat counter to 
my wishes, I begin to understand it better.” 

“Well, you must remember that whatever God 
plans for us, has for its ultimate end our highest 
good and happiness. He always does the wisest 
and best thing for us, and it is the height of folly to 
resist His will, or to be unhappy over His 
requirements and dealings.” 

“Why, yes, if Esther does marry Mr. Gray, just 
see how much happiness I shall gain for myself, 
besides all the good that can be done ; and I was so 
foolish as to feel quite wicked about it at first ; yet, 
by this very means, I may be able to do for her and 
through her, what I have wished to do for the last 
two years. ’ ’ 


298 


In Prime. 


“Yes, if this comes about, it will be one of the 
instances where the Lord allows us to see how wise 
and good are all His ways. From it you at least 
must learn to abide His will cheerfully, nay, joyfully, 
even when you cannot see the outcome. I fear 
we have but a vague understanding of God’s love, 
after all. We apprehend very faintly what an all- 
wise, all-powerful, all-loving Being He is. We 
must seek to know more of Him. “ 

“I am glad he does not leave me all alone to find 
out things, but takes such delightful ways to teach 
me of Himself. I think, hereafter, I shall call duty, 
joy, even if I do not understand the whys and 
wherefores of it; or if it sometimes runs quite 
counter to my most cherished hopes and plans. “ 

“If you carryout your resolution, your life will be 
full of gladness for yourself and others. ’ ’ 

“Do you know, I sometimes think seriously of 
entering upon mission work myself. I cannot lead 
an aimless life in fashionable society ; neither can I 
simply settle down to enjoy my wealth, and 
occasionally give money to such causes as impress 
me as worthy. ’ ’ 

“Careful, — be careful! When you are sure you 
are called by our Savior to take up any life work, 
obey, instantly and joyfully. But be careful how 
you plunge into anything, because, as now seems to 
be the case, you are unsettled and restless. You 
are young and can afEord to take time to think it 
over well, and make sure that you are right. ‘All 
things come to him who waits. * After awhile you 
will see clearly what is your work.“ 

“Yes, that is true. One thing, however, is 


In Primo. 


299 


certain. I must get things well in motion before 
Mr. Gray and Esther come to any understanding. I 
am afraid she may rather upset my plans if they are 
not well under way by the time she comes to the' 
throne.” 

“Well, my dear, be careful and considerate in all 
you do. I will now let you go back to your room, 
for it is getting dark. ’ ’ 

So, bidding her good night, I came away. Find- 
ing myself restless and wakeful, I finished writing 
up my journal. 


CHAPTER XXIV. 


July — , i8— 

To-day I had an opportunity of 
talking with Mr. Gray. The conversation led into a 
discussion on religious work, in which he gave me 
his ideal of city mission work. I told him I had 
heard something about his plans from Mrs. Howard, 
and was greatly interested in them. I also said to 
him that if he could meet my conditions, namely, that 
my name should be in no way connected with the 
movement, and that no one should know that I had 
contributed toward the enterprise, or its support 
after its establishment, I would like to help in 
making such an undertaking possible. 

Mr. Gray seemed very grateful and readily com- 
plied with my conditions. Then we talked over 
plans and he gave me estimates of the cost of the 
various buildings, with all of which I was well 
pleased, except that of the missionary home, which 
I insisted should be larger and better supplied 
with modern conveniences. To this Mr. Gray 
replied : 

“I planned a very moderate outlay for this, 
because I anticipated a lack of funds; also, because 
there seems to be a prevailing opinion that people 
who engage in special work of this sort ought to be 
very self-denying.” 

“I, too, have heard a deal about that, but I am 
impressed that very many who are so ready to 

300 


In Prime. 


301 


insist on ascetic living for those who devote their 
lives to the good of others, are, themselves, any- 
thing but ready to set the example. One Christian 
is as responsible as another for the uplifting of the 
world. If you are willing to lay aside all that your 
opportunity, superior advantages and abilities make 
possible for you, surely those who are not called to 
make such sacrifices ought not to expect or require 
you to have less of home comforts than they them- 
selves enjoy.” 

“Yes, I know that it is not reasonable, and that the 
same people who talk in this way, ignorant ones 
excepted, usually do it, because either they them- 
selves do not want to make the sacrifices necessary to 
carry through such undertakings; or they are in 
positions where they wish to manage the funds thus 
saved to carry forward schemes and ambitions of 
their own. In either case, selfishness is at the root 
of the matter. Since this is so, I have thought it 
best to live with the utmost economy, and leave 
them no excuse for withholding their funds, and 
compel them from very shame to assist a little.” 

“You cannot do it. There is no satisfying the 
demands of these dogmatic, pharisaical, selfish peo- 
ple. We can only ignore them. I really have 
little faith in the Christianity of any one, who com- 
fortably settles down to the belief that more self- 
denial is required of men like you than of any one 
else. 

“Now, in tr y own case, I have consecrated what I 
possess to the service of the Master. Since you are 
engaging in the work Christ commanded the 
church to do, you and I are co-partners with Him in 


302 


In Prime. 


this service. As a comfortable home and sufficient 
support are as necessary for you as for me, I believe 
it to be as much my duty to see that you are thus 
provided for, as it is to provide for myself.*' 

“That is a correct principle. The responsibility 
of Christianizing the world rests upon all Christians 
equally. But since so few of them thus feel their 
responsibilities, I see no way but to do the best 
possible with the small means at hand.” 

“Only, do not call such narrow-minded, selfish 
people Christians. With your permission, I would 
like to provide such a mission home as I, myself, 
would be willing to occupy.” 

“Miss Seymour, there is yet another point to be 
considered. I fear that a missionary living in the 
sort of home the business man considers necessary 
for himself, would not be able to come into such close 
contact as is desirable with the class of people 
among whom I wish to work.” 

“Now, Mr. Gray, — please excuse me for presum- 
ing to differ in opinion with one who has had so 
much experience as yourself, — but last winter I did 
a little of this work, and am convinced that the 
antagonism felt by the classes you refer to is not 
caused by the wealth of rich people, but by the spirit 
they manifest. The cause lies in the selfish 
indifference of the moneyed ones. If a wealthy man 
or woman goes to them with a true, loving heart, 
recognizing that they are human beings, and treat- 
ing them as if they were capable of bettering them- 
selves if the opportunity were given, there is no 
trouble in getting in touch with them. It is the 
lack of real sympathy that makes the trouble, and 


In Primo. 


303 


no amount of money given as alms will ever bridge 
the chasm.’* 

‘‘I, too, have felt that. Still, the idea that a large 
house and pride are inseparable, seems so fixed 
in the minds of both rich and poor that it is hard 
to overcome.” 

“Do you not see that even the little, inconvenient 
house you have planned, will seem like a palace to 
many of these poor people who live in such wretched 
places? Moreover, if you have a plain, large house, 
and make the people truly welcome to come and 
enjoy it with you, this in itself will prove a powerful 
auxiliary to your general work. Tell them that 
this house was placed there by one who loved you 
and them; and that it is intended for their enjoy- 
ment, and also as an inspiration to them to try to 
win a comfortable home for themselves. ” 

“If you build such a house, with such an under- 
standing of the uses to which it may be put, I make 
no further objections. Although I do not agree 
with you in all particulars, I think you are right in 
your general conclusions. Still I do not want to 
accept your contributions, and then have you feel 
dissatisfied with the use I may make of what you 
have provided. ’ ’ 

“I think there will be no trouble on this score. 
On the principle that I would not be willing for you 
to occupy a less comfortable home than myself, I 
insist upon what I have told you. On the other 
hand, if any home I may ever possess, can help any 
one to a happier, more successful life, it would be 
my highest joy to use it in that way. Therefore, I 
should desire you to do the same with yours. For 


304 


In Prime. 


this reason I insisted on a suite of private apartments, 
sacred to your own use, where you could retire from 
care and work, and rest undisturbed.” 

“Very well, in these respects we are of one mind. 
You have put some things in a new light. Few 
young ladies have thought so deeply on such sub- 
jects as these. “ 

“You know, my life work is simply to be just the 
sort of woman Christ would have me be ; hence it 
behooves me to study my work as carefully and as 
prayerfully as you study yours.” 

“That is true.” 

I came away to think and pray over this great 
undertaking. More and more I realize the respon- 
sibility of those to whom the Lord has given treas- 
ure to be used for Himself. 

July—, i8— 

To-day the Berkelys went out for 
a picnic, Mrs. Rodgers and Kate accompanying 
them. The Granbys and Mr. Gray have also gone 
in a large carriage for an all-day outing. Not feel- 
ing in a mood to accompany either party, and 
having a good excuse for not going, since I have 
not been feeling well, I stayed at home. One of 
Mrs Howard’s children is ailing, so she thought it 
best to remain with them. 

I am going to write something that hitherto I 
could not tell even to m3’’ journal. However, since 
Mrs. Howard knows about it, I may as well put it 
down. This afternoon she asked me to come and 
sit with her in the cool parlor. Presently she said : 

“I think this a good opportunity to ask you about 
the matter I spoke of a little time ago.” 


In Primo. 


305 


“Yes,” I replied, “I have been intending to speak 
to you about that.” 

“Julia, do you believe me to be a true friend to 
you; that I would do anything I could to help you?” 

“Yes, Mrs. Howard, I am sure of that.” 

“Well, I am going to prove my friendship for you 
by running the risk of offending you. I am going 
to speak to you on a very delicate subject, for unless 
I do, I fear there may be some misunderstanding 
and consequent unhappiness. ’ ’ 

Wonderingly I replied: 

“You will not offend me. What is it?” 

“Well, Julia, the other morning, feeling too 
indolent to read, too unsocial to talk to the lively, 
pleasant people in the house, and not disposed to 
endure the solitude and loneliness of my private 
room on such a beautiful day, I hied me away from 
this pretty spot to a quiet, shady place in the grove 
which I am in the habit of visiting. I had been 
there but a short time when Mr. Granby, who had 
gone for a walk, passed near, saw me and seated 
himself beside me. I at once resolved to improve 
the opportunity by speaking my mind to Howard 
Granby, and knew there was little probability of 
interruption in this leaf-screened retreat. 

“I drew him out to express his views of life and 
to mention the aims of his ambition. Then I 
ventured to broach the subject on my mind by 
making a remark which led to a conversation that 
seemed greatly to disturb him. 

“ ‘Mr. Granby,’ said I, ‘you have disappointed 
me.’ 

“ ‘I am very sorry,’ he replied, ‘but tell me in 


3o6 


In Primo. 


what way; perhaps I may be able to redeem 
myself. ’ 

“ ‘Will you really allow me the privilege of a 
great friend who takes a deep interest in you?’ 

“ ‘Certainly, Mrs. Howard.’ 

“ ‘ I take you at your word and you are in honor 
bound not to take offense. * 

“ ‘I so consider it. ’ 

“ ‘Well, I am disappointed that you have not felt 
the appropriateness of a marriage with Miss 
Seymour. With your high ideals of life, and her 
intense earnestness to fulfill her mission in the 
world, I thought there could be no doubt as to the 
result of your acquaintance. What is the matter? 
I am sure you are not indifferent to Miss 
Seymour. ’ 

“Mr. Granby made no reply, but rose and walked 
to the edge of the little brook near which we had been 
sitting. As he passed me I caught a glimpse of the 
struggle in his pale face, but as he stood looking 
across the stream to the opening beyond, I saw only 
his tall, well proportioned form, which seemed to 
speak of strength of body and character that would 
enable him successfully to combat and overcome 
every difficulty. 

“Presently he returned to his seat beside me, 
picked up the book he had dropped and aimlessly 
turned the leaves. Seeing he was not ready to 
speak, and being uncertain as to what he would say, 
I waited. When at last he began, his still pale face 
and suppressed tone revealed the emotion he felt. 

“‘Mrs. Howard,’ he said, ‘I admit that I have 
been much interested in Miss Seymour; I will go 


In Primo. 


307 


further, and say that she is the only woman whom I 
have wished to make my wife ; and I am sure she is 
the only one who can ever fill that place. But there 
are obstacles in the way which render impossible 
my marriage with Miss Seymour. ’ 

“ ‘I cannot conceive of any possible objection to 
such a marriage. Since you have told me so much, 
will you not tell me all?’ 

“ ‘Yes, I believe it would do me good to open 
my heart to so true and sympathizing a friend. 
Undoubtedly I am far too reticent. 

“ ‘Miss Seymour is immensely wealthy. Were 
it otherwise, I would spare no effort to win her. As 
it is, my sense of honor would not perm-it me to ask 
her to share such a home, comforts and privileges 
as I could offer her. Neither could I be dependent 
upon my wife financially, as would be the case were 
she to provide for herself the support to which she 
has been accustomed. ’ 

“ ‘I am surprised at your unreasonableness, but 
will not argue that point with you now. Regarding 
her as you do, has it never occurred to you that she 
has a right to know your sentiments? Why do you 
not simply state the facts to her and leave her to 
act as she thinks right, and for her happiness. ’ 

“ ‘That being the view I had of my duty, I have 
done so. ’ 

“ ‘Did she refuse you? 

“ ‘She could hardly do so when I did not ask her 
to be my wife, but simply told her of my regard for 
her and the reason why I could not ask her to share 
my life. ’ 

“ ‘What did Julia say?’ I asked in dismay. ‘A 


3o8 


In Primo. 


more embarrassing situation for a young lady could 
not be conceived. ’ 

“ ‘Miss Seymour behaved with perfect grace and 
dignity, replied that she considered my regard for 
her as a great honor, bowed, and retired to the 
house. We had been standing under the great elm 
tree on the lawn. ’ 

“ ‘Howard, do you not see what an unfair 
advantage you have taken of an intelligent, fair- 
minded and beautiful woman? You have satisfied 
your sense of honor by stating your side of the 
question, but you have given her no opportunity to 
do the same without seeming to be what she has 
been taught to consider unmaidenly. Rather than 
do that, Julia Seymour would carry the secret of her 
unasked love to the grave. I must say you have 
done very badly!’ 

“ ‘I grant that, but I could not do better under 
the circumstances. ’ 

“ ‘But if Julia loved you enough to be willing to 
live in just such a manner as she would were she a 
poor girl, would you not consider your conditions 
met?’ 

“ ‘I do not anticipate that a bright, beautiful girl, 
like Miss Seymour, would be willing to relinquish 
her opportunities and most cherished plans for such 
a reason ; especially when I am the man for whom 
the sacrifice is to be made. ’ 

“ ‘How do you know? Perhaps you are depriving 
her of lifelong happiness!’ 

“ ‘Mrs. Howard,’ he replied, rising and standing 
before me, ‘I do not believe you realize what this 
young lady is. You do not know her as I do, who 


In Primo. 


309 


have watched and studied her for these two years. 
She is as good and capable as she is beautiful. If 
you could have seen Miss Seymour while I was 
telling her of this great crisis in my life, as she 
stood with the sunlight filtering through the leaves, 
falling on her golden hair, her fair face, her dainty 
green and white muslin dress, her beautiful, slender 
hands clasping the bunch of red roses I had brought 
from the city, and with such a kind, modest 
expression on her face ! If you could have heard the 
sweet seriousness and the dignity of her answer, 
and beheld the quiet grace of her manner as she 
spoke, and at the end bowed and left me, — knowing 
and honoring her as I do, it would be presumption 
in me to ask her to become my wife. ’ 

“ ‘If Julia Seymour loves you, she would count 
herself honored beyond measure were you to ofEer 
her your lifelong companionship and love. ’ 

“ ‘Mrs. Howard, you amaze me! Surely you do 
not appreciate Miss Seymour. ' 

“ ‘It is because I do appreciate both you and her 
that I say this. No ordinary man will make Julia 
Seymour happy; neither will an ordinary woman 
make 3"ou happy. It is because she, as a woman, 
can measure up to you in ability and character, that 
I say she could well afford to cast aside her wealth, 
rather than lose what you might offer her. ’ 

“ ‘But. Miss Seymour gave me not the slightest 
reason to suppose that under any circumstances 
she would marr^^ me!’ 

“ ‘Did you expect her to do so?’ 

“ ‘If she loved me would she have been able to 
listen to me so calmly and to reply so collectedly?* 


310 


In Prime. 


“ ‘If she loved you as much as you love her, and 
found her heart responding to your sentiment, she 
would. Because a girl blushes, casts down her eyes, 
and appears embarrassed, you are not to conclude 
she is in love with you. It may be because she 
fears you may think that of her; or she is embar- 
rassed because she is uncertain of your meaning ; or, 
perhaps, because she has not the power to under- 
stand a great affection. “Perfect love caste th out 
fear.” Julia’s calm reception of your statement 
would, to me, mean that her soul was in the most 
perfect harmony with yours; that she understood 
you so completely, and so fully returned your 
affection that it was impossible for her to feel the 
least embarrassment. ’ 

“ ‘Mrs. Howard, you put things in a strange way, 
and have given me much to think about. Pardon 
me if I leave you now. I must be alone for a time 
to consider what you have so clearly and simply 
presented. ’ 

“I came back to the house, well content with my 
morning’s work. At luncheon inquiries were made 
as to the reason of Mr. Granby’s absence. (You 
had a headache and did not leave your room.) 
One of the young ladies remarked : 

“ ‘We must hold Mrs. Hov/ard responsible for Mr. 
Granby’s non-appearance, for, as I v/as rambling 
in the woods this morning I saw them seated near 
the brook, deep in some serious discussion. ’ 

“ ‘I left him in the grove two hours ago,’ I replied. 
‘You will have to get some one else to account for 
his absence since then. ’ ’ ' 


CHAPTER XXV. 


When Mrs. Howard paused, I said : 

“I will be perfectly frank with you, Mrs. Howard, 
although it is not easy for me to talk on this 
subject." 

“I know it, my dear, but remember how much I 
love you and that I am doing with you as I would 
like some good woman to do with my daughter, 
should she ever be similarly situated. I am doing 
what I think your mother would want done could she 
know the circumstances." 

"Mrs. Howard, you have understood me perfectly, 
and as things are, I am not sorry you spoke to Mr. 
Granby as you did, although, had I known your 
intention, I could never have consented to it. 

"Mr. Granby has again spoken to me, saying 
that perhaps he had not dealt fairly with me in 
making his statement in such a way that I could 
not express my feelings without seeming uncon- 
ventional ; he asked me not to suppose that he did 
this intentionally, and explained to me as he did to 
you, by saying that he did not wish to ask me to 
leave my life of ease and wealth to share such a 
home as he could offer me. 

"I did not hesitate to tell him that I fully recipro- 
cated his affection. Furthermore, I told him that 
although I could not understand what difference it 
could make as to who owned the money, or whether 
it came from his family or mine, since all our 


312 


In Primo. 


interests would be one, — still, his income, which he 
had named, would procure for me all that I need, 
or, in any case, intend to spend on myself per- 
sonally. I then explained to him that I had already 
decided that all of my income, over and above what 
my simple wants require, ought to be devoted to 
benefiting humanity. Therefore, his feeling on the 
subject of receiving any of my inherited wealth, or 
of not being able to support me in the style of living 
which would be mine, were I not married to him, 
need not stand in the way. 

“I still further told him that, since I feel God 
has given me my means for use in his service, 
I cannot conscientiously let it pass out of my hands; 
and hence I must retain control of it for this purpose. 
Mr. Granby declared this arrangement perfectly 
satisfactory to him. 

“You know, Mrs. Howard, I have tried fashion- 
able life in the highest circles of American society, 
and care nothing for it, further than that I prize the 
friendship of genuinely good rich people as much 
as I do that of any other good people. I know, 
too, that none whose friendship is of any value will 
withhold it because I choose a simple mode of life. 
The home, society and privileges that Mr. Granby’s 
income guarantees, will meet, not only all my needs, 
but all my desires, so far as such things can. Com- 
munion with God, — the companionship of my hus- 
band, and the abundant opportunity for intellectual 
culture that will be mine, will meet every other 
possible need of my being. So you see, my pros- 
pects promise as perfectly happy and complete a life 
as is possible in this world. ’ ’ 


In Primo. 


313 


“I am very glad you have come to so satisfactory 
an understanding,” replied Mrs. Howard. “I sup- 
pose you have no objection to telling me when you 
and Mr. Granby expect to be married?” 

“We have no definite plans as to time. Mr. 
Granby says he does not want to hurry me. He 
does not doubt my affection for him, but thinks it 
is best for us both to be perfectly sure this is the 
right thing for us to do. Therefore we have 
decided to wait two years, and if we are then of the 
same opinion, he thinks we will be safe in marrying. ” 

“Well, I hope by that time Mr. Granby will find 
that he ought to take you and your gold, and share 
it with you as willingly as you share his income with 
him.” 

“Yes, I recognize this as his weak point. Yet, 
realizing his many noble qualities, I am disposed to 
yield to this honorable, if rather extreme demand 
of Mr. Granby’s. 

“I have been thinking how little girls who are not 
rich know of the troubles of those who are. Now, I 
have had offers of marriage from those who were 
very willing to take charge of my money, and in 
consideration of this, were willing to take me, too ; 
but see the trouble I have had in coming to an 
understanding with the one man in all the world 
whom I want to marry ! Other girls know nothing 
about what I have undergone this summer. It was 
really making me ill.” 

“The old adage is, ‘All is well that ends well,’ and 
I think it will come out all right. In the meantime 
will you carry out your plan of foreign travel?” 

“Yes, Mr. Granby and I talked that over. He 


314 


In Prime. 


has spent two years abroad; otherwise he would 
want me to wait until after our marriage and then 
arrange to spend some time in Europe together. 
As it is, he thinks he ought to apply himself closely 
to business and thus prepare to carry out his plans 
for the future. ’ ' 

“When do you expect to start? The last I heard 
you say about it, you seemed anxious to go as soon 
as circumstances would permit. ’ ’ 

“As things are turning out, I do not want to leave 
America until Mr. Gray’s mission buildings are well 
under way. As nearly as I can understand, that 
will not be before October, or at least a month later 
than I had intended going.” 

“Does Esther know about your engagement to 
Mr. Granby?” 

“No. This, together with her and Mr. Gray’s 
affairs, have so troubled me! For a long time I 
have been looking forward to this vacation, when I 
could talk everything over with Esther, but you 
know there has been no opportunity. Then, after 
the first interview with Mr. Granby, you can 
imagine how I felt, — and I could not talk to Esther. 
After the second I did not feel any more disposed 
to do so. ’ ’ 

“Your disinclination to talk of your affairs ought 
to be respected. Had I known of this second inter- 
view I would not thus have intruded myself upon 
your confidence. Please forgive me, and rest 
assured I shall repeat nothing you have told me. ” 

“Oh, you do not understand me. I am not sorry 
you have thus spoken to me ; it is really a relief to 
talk with some one about it, although I should have 


In Primo. 


315 


shrunk from it had I known what you were going 
to say when you began. ’ ’ 

“I think there are more who sympathize with you 
than you know. ' ’ 

“Mrs. Howard, has any one else suspected the 
truth? Since Mr. Granby told you I do not object 
to your knowing all ; but I would rather others did 
not know of his feeling about money matters, lest 
they criticise him. We understand each other, and 
it is not necessary to make explanations to others.” 

“No, no, Julia, only they have noticed all the time 
how Mr. Granby has, in a way, seemed to claim 
you, and that you were unhappy; they have only 
wondered what was the matter.” 

“I am sorry I could not better guard my secret. 
Of course, now it does not matter so much. But 
for awhile I did wish I could go away from this 
place without causing too much comment.” 

“Why, child, who would comment unkindly? Do 
you not realize that you are among friends? 
Excuse me, but do you know you have somewhat 
withdrawn yourself from us all?” 

At this the thought of all the late loneliness and 
trouble overcame me, and I could not longer control 
myself, but wept unrestrainedly. Mrs. Howard drew 
me into her lap, caressed me like a child, and told 
me how much they all loved me. When I grew calm, 
I said : 

“Mrs. Howard, I suppose I am to blame, — but I 
am all alone in the world ; never before have I so 
wished for my mother. Esther has her mother, her 
brothers and her sisters; the Granbys have each 
other; so have Mrs. Rodgers and Kate, while you 


In Primo. 


316 

have Mr. Howard and the children. Then to make 
it still worse for me, Mr. Gray has been laying this 
new claim to Esther. So I felt there was no one 
who really had time to think about my trouble. 
Before I came here I could not help knowing 
that Mr. Granby loved me, and I wanted to talk 
with Esther about it, but could never find her alone, 
and I could not interrupt the family conversation 
by calling her away from them.” 

“Is it possible that our Julia has been a little 
jealous?” 

“Oh, Mrs. Howard, how can you so misjudge me? 
I am not in the least envious of one of you. I would 
not take from you a single joy. Don’t you know 
that? But do you not see how I have wanted some 
one to talk a little while, just with me? Everybody 
has been very kind ; you have let me right into your 
circles and made me one of you. The trouble has 
been that I have had some affairs I was unwilling to 
let any one know of but Esther; since Mr. Gray 
came I have not wanted to tell even her. I have 
always felt that I must tell her everything first, and 
then I would know what to do next. Not being 
able to do this, and feeling that I could not come in 
between any of the friends here, has made me feel 
somewhat alone.” 

“No, I know you are not jealous. I said that to 
get at the root of this separation from us all. Now 
that I have broken through your reserve, you will 
not fail to come to me freely, will you? As is often 
the case, things seem to be taking a shape that will 
give several of you young people food for thought. 
But all this was bound to come sooner or later, and 


In Primo. 


317 


the turn your affairs have taken has made it espe- 
cially hard for you. But has not Mr. Granby told 
his sisters of your engagement?’' 

“Oh, I suppose I am a little nervous and morbid. 
They are so devoted to their brother, I have feared 
lest Mrs. Willard and Isabelle might not find it easy 
to reconcile themselves to my coming into their 
family life, where, hitherto, they have had Howard’s 
undivided affection and attention. Mr. Granby says 
it is utterly impossible for such unselfish sisters to 
feel in that way. But you know how I felt about 
Mr. Gray! However, I have consented to his telling 
them to-day; so you can understand how uncertain 
I feel about what will happen when they return this 
evening. ’’ 

“Why, you foolish little girl! What a lot of need- 
less trouble you are giving yourself ! Several days 
ago Mrs. Willard remarked to me how glad she 
would be, should Howard make you her sister, for 
you were her ideal of what his wife should be. So, 
now run back to your room, have a good rest, and be 
prepared to receive an overwhelming welcome into 
the Granby family. ’ ’ 

I rested awhile, and then hastened to my journal, 
for I shall probably have little time to write this 
evening. 


CHAPTER XXVI. 


Soon after Julia’s engagement was made known, 
Mr. Gray and myself informed our friends of our 
intended marriage. As Mrs. Bradford had written 
me that, on account of failing health, she would be 
obliged to close Fledding, and therefore would no 
longer require my services as a teacher, there was 
no reason why we should postpone our marriage. 
Hence, in order that it might take place before 
Julia’s departure for Europe, we arranged for an 
early date in September. By the first of October 
it would be necessary for Mr. Gray to return to New 
York to look after his work there, and see to the 
completion of the mission house, as well as to super- 
intend the work of the other buildings, all of which 
were begun early in August. Since we were not 
planning an extended wedding tour, we accepted 
Julia’s invitation to spend the intervening time at 
Sunset Park. 

Mr. Granby’s family, whose home was in the 
country, insisted upon Julia’s making them a visit, 
from which place the following letter was written : 

W , September — , i8 — . 

Dear Esther: — = 

:1c ^ ^ 

Of course you want to know about Howard’s par- 
ents and their home. Howard and Isabelle inherit 
their dignity of manner and general characteristics 
from their stately, intelligent mother, whom they 
318 


In Prime. 


319 


also resemble in person. She is an ideal, loving 
mother, and takes me into her heart as she does her 
other children. 

Except that he is of medium height, Alice Willard 
bears a stronger likeness to her father than the 
others do ; it is from him she inherits her elegance 
of manner and fine presence. As you have heard 
from Mrs. Howard, he is well educated, and has 
considerable literary ability; he is one of the finest 
conversationalists I ever met. In your mother and 
Mrs. Rodgers I saw and felt what a mother could 
be, but I am now learning something of what it is 
to have a father. I am as much at home in his house, 
and believe he gives me as large a place in his heart, 
as if I had been born here. 

Ernest, Howard’s only brother, has one of the 
most beautiful Christian characters I ever knew. 
He has been a sufferer since early childhood ; pos- 
sessed of powers that would have enabled him to do 
great things had he grown to manhood in health 
and vigor, he has been compelled to spend his 
young life in a sick room. Here he has so devel- 
oped his naturally patient disposition, and so studied 
the deep things of God, that it is an inspiration to 
know him. He has opened up the Scriptures to my 
mind, and taught me more of what God is like, than 
all the ministers I have ever heard, and all the teach- 
ers I have ever had. His large brown eyes seem to 
be ever looking out and beyond, into things too 
great to be spoken of. From unseen sources he 
draws supplies of wisdom and grace, until he himself 
has become like an inexhaustible spring of fresh and 
living water. 


320 


In Primo. 


Mr. and Mrs. Granby have taken great pains with 
his education, and so far from having become a 
mystic, or one who gives attention to nothing out- 
side of religious matters, he is interested in all the 
events of the times. Ernest says that the more he 
learns of what is going on in the world, the more he 
is interested in the relations of the Kingdom of God 
to the condition and conduct of men. 

Before coming here Howard intimated to me that 
I would better not bring Parsons with me, as his 
mother and sisters would probably prefer doing for 
me all that I would be likely to need, and that room 
at the farm-house was limited. How I laughed at 
him, and assured him that I had not forgotten the 
lessons learned at Fledding! 

I find the farm-house delightful. It was built by 
Howard’s grandfather a few years before he died. 
It is a large, two-storied stone house, with deep 
windows and large, pleasant rooms. 

My room is upstairs and over the parlor. It is 
redolent with the odor of dried rose leaves and of 
other sweet-scented blossoms. Everything in the 
room, while very simple, is cozy and restful; the 
white muslin window curtains and white bed dra- 
peries giving a fresh and dainty appearance to the 
room. 

The entire house is furnished in a simple, but 
comfortable and tasteful manner. The only really 
valuable articles it contains, aside from the rare old 
china and silverware with which the table is set, 
and which has been in the family for generations, 
are a number of fine family portraits of past and 
present generations, and some good oil paintings. 


In Primo. 


321 


These are scattered through the different rooms, and 
some are excellent works of art, representing the 
collections of more than one lifetime. Of books 
there is no lack, for there are bookcases or shelves 
in every room in the house, not excepting the 
kitchen. One side of Ernest’s room, which adjoins 
the parlor, is occupied by shelves filled with well- 
chosen books. 

The little lawn in front of the house is shaded by 
fine old trees under which the family spends con- 
siderable time on warm days. Within a five min- 
utes* walk, and across a tiny, picturesque brook of 
the clearest water, is a quaint old country church, 
surrounded by a grove of majestic elms, under 
whose shade father Granby played when a child. 

I need not tell you that I am enjoying myself 
with these refined, highly spiritual people, nor what 
a dear sister Isabelle is. I should be hard to please 
were I not satisfied with them, and with the recep- 
tions they have given me. 

As ever, your loving 

JULIA. 

A letter from Mrs. Granby to Mrs. Howard, 
written shortly after this, expresses the delight the 
family felt at the choice made by her son. In this 
letter she said: “Julia came to us as one of our own, 
at once taking her place, and seeming as much at 
home with us as if she only had returned after a 
short absence. I cannot realize that I have not 
always known her and that she has not always been 
my child. Indeed, Howard says she has.“ 


322 


In Prime. 


After Julia’s return to New York, Mr. Gray and 
myself reached the city in time to spend a few days 
at the hotel with her before her departure, our home 
not yet being ready for occupancy. Here I also 
met Mr. and Mrs. Albert Cooper, who were on their 
way to the Continent on their wedding trip. We 
were most agreeably surprised to find in Mr. Cooper 
a gentleman of easy and rather prepossessing 
manners. He promises to become an intelligent 
and successful business man; and his frank and 
honest face indicates a man of principle and honor. 

From Julia I learned that Mr. Cooper’s father had 
died the preceding February, leaving him the bulk 
of his large property after providing for his wife 
and two daughters. The elder daughter had 
married an English officer a short time before her 
father’s death, and was in Europe when it occurred. 

It seems, as I have since learned, that the father 
felt great satisfaction in Albert’s intimacy with 
Julia, and although somewhat impatient with what 
he termed his son’s slowness in bringing things to a 
climax, he w^as always hopeful of the outcome. 
Albert thought it best to keep his own council and 
allow matters to take their course. With this in 
view, he earnestly applied himself to his law studies, 
and kept up his acquaintance with Julia and Miss 
Case, and such friends of theirs as he chanced to 
meet, always making the best of his opportunities 
for self-improvement. 

After his father’s death, although it was evident 
to himself as well as others that he would never suc- 
ceed as a lawyer, he followed the advice of his new 
friends, and determined to finish his course of study, 


In Prime. 


3^3 


because of the help it would be to him in the man- 
agement of his large property. 

Early in the summer, after accomplishing this, he 
greatly astonished and displeased his sisters by 
announcing to them his engagement to Miss Case. 
Even his mother roused herself from her indolent 
indifference sufficiently to express her disapproval 
of his marriage with a penniless school-teacher ; she 
had supposed he was going to marry Miss Seymour. 
Why had he not done so? Finding her indignant 
remonstrances of no avail, she settled down again 
into her usual state of apathy, while his sisters 
declared they would never recognize his intended 
wife as a member of their family. Albert, in his 
slow, quiet way, informed them that they would 
probably have no opportunity to do so, as he did not 
care to have so cultured a lady as Miss Case com- 
pelled to associate with women so lacking in intelli- 
gence and refinement as his sisters. 

On her part, Miss Case did not consider it neces- 
sary to inform her uncle and aunts of her plans. 
Therefore, when they heard of her marriage to a 
man much wealthier than even her rich aunt, they 
showered congratulations upon her, reproaching her 
for not letting them know of it, so they might have 
arranged for her wedding in the home of her rela- 
tives. They now insisted that she and her husband 
should come to visit them before their departure for 
Europe. Mrs. Cooper replied briefl}^, stating that 
Mr. Cooper’s plans were such that it would not be 
convenient to accept their invitation. 

After Julia, Mrs. Rodgers and the Coopers left 
New York, Mr. Gray and myself were fully occupied 


324 


In Prime. 


in the work with which our hearts and hands were 
filled. 

Until I recently read these later entries in Julia’s 
journal, I did not know of her thoughtful and gener- 
ous provision for my comfort and welfare. Mr. 
Gray, faithful to his promise, had never mentioned 
it to me. Neither had I the least idea of the trouble 
Julia felt over my probable marriage with Mr. 
Gray; nor of her difficulty in securing opportunities 
for confidential conversations with me. I did not 
suspect her need of sympathy and counsel, for I felt 
that she had developed into a capable woman, whom 
I was no longer competent to guide and advise ; she 
had become my companion rather than my pupil. 
I found in her heights and depths of spiritual power, 
which caused me instinctively to feel like sitting at 
her feet to receive benefit and instruction. Then, 
too, the certainty I felt of the wisdom of whatever 
course she might pursue, prevented my thinking of 
her continuing to consult me on matters closely 
related to herself. But Julia never realized all this, 
and construed my inability always to go on counsel- 
ing and directing her, into a lack of opportunity to 
secure my undivided attention. 

Before I met Mr. Granby I had discovered that he 
had won Julia’s heart, and it was with no small 
anxiety that I awaited the outcome of their acquaint- 
ance. After I knew him I could not tolerate the 
thought that two people so evidently fitted for each 
other, should fail in fulfilling what, to all appear- 
ances, was their destiny. However, I never pre- 
sumed upon broaching the subject to Julia. 

As Julia elsewhere remarks in her journal, this 


In Primo. 


325 


clinging to her friends, and relying upon their judg- 
ment, indicated a lack of faith in God. By being 
deprived of the human support she had so depended 
upon, she learned to take a firmer hold upon the 
Rock of Ages, and to place all her dependence upon 
Him. Since that time, she claims to have looked 
more entirely to her Lord and Savior as the source 
of all help, wisdom, love and sympathy ; and to have 
learned to appeal to the “Mighty Counselor” in her 
times of need. 

Julia and Mrs. Rodgers spent two years abroad. 
Time and space do not permit my giving her 
delightful, helpful letters written to me during those 
two years. Suffice it to say that she shared with me 
every beautiful scene, every helpful experience, 
every addition to her fund of knowledge. In her 
whole busy life, Julia was never known to forget a 
friend ; in the midst of her travels and enjoyment of 
things new and strange, her thoughts were full of 
interest and plans for those she loved. The follow- 
ing is copied from her journal, written while cross- 
ing the Atlantic on her way to Europe : 

October — , 18 — . — 

I am very happy to-day. Mr. 
and Mrs. Cooper have been telling me of their plans. 
In the midst of the conversation, Mr. Cooper broke 
out with : 

“Miss Seymour, I want to tell you something! 
Mrs. Cooper and I have been talking things over, 
and we intend to follow your example and begin life 
by always first considering God’s will with reference 
to our plans. We believe this to be not only right 
and wise, but a debt we owe for all the good you 


326 


In Primo. 


have done us, and for the influence of your Christian 
example.” 

“Yes,” added Mrs. Cooper, “we see the advantage 
of beginning right, if we hope to succeed. I have 
noticed quite a number of middle-aged people who 
seem to be anxious to lead an out and out, thorough 
Christian life, but who in past years have allowed 
themselves to become so entangled in business, and 
in social and family matters, that it seems almost 
impossible to make a change without uprooting and 
overturning their whole lives. Also, aside from the 
difficulty they find in beginning to do new things in 
a new way, they encounter serious and determined 
opposition from their families and friends. We see 
that if we begin right we shall avoid such complica- 
tions and trouble.” 

“We have been wondering,” continued Mr. 
Cooper, “whether you would care to sell your New 
York residence just as it is, furniture and all. You 
remember you took me over the house when I 
visited you last winter. I was much pleased with 
the place. ’ ’ 

“The fact is,” continued Mrs. Cooper, “we intend 
to carry out your theory, developed the winter you 
and Mrs. Rodgers occupied the house. We want to 
show the possibility of rich people living in a happy, 
reasonable way in a beautiful home, and at the same 
time making it a means of giving pleasure and help 
to all within our reach. Your stay in the city was 
too short to have the general and permanent effect 
we believe possible. ’ ’ 

“I am very glad to hear you say this,” I replied. 
“I have my hands too full to do all I see needs to be 


In Prime. 


327 


done. I had to let go of something. Therefore, I 
gave up trying to mould fashionable life that I 
might devote more time to helping people who 
desire to be respectable, but who are unable to over- 
come their misfortunes without assistance. Then, 
too, since I have not had a college education, I feel 
that I ought, and must, supplement what I have 
received by travel and private study. I shall be 
glad to see you take up this work, for I believe you 
are well adapted to make a success of it.’' 

“While my income is large,” continued Mr. 
Cooper, “and will enable us to do a great deal that 
will give us, — and we hope many others, — much 
pleasure, yet we must of necessity limit out opera- 
tions for making people better and happier; so 
we will endeavor to cooperate with you by taking 
up some lines of work for which you have no 
time.” 

But, oh, I cannot tell how much joy it gave me to 
find that anything in my life or example has led Mr. 
and Mrs. Cooper to the resolve they expressed. If 
I could only exert such an influence over more 
people I would not so much regret my own limita- 
tions of time and ability, for money does not enable 
one to do all that I desire to do. In this case I feel 
that through the Coopers I am being allowed to 
carry on a work that lies very near my heart. So 
much energy and talent are being wasted by the 
society people of our great cities. Oh, for more peo- 
ple like Mr. and Mrs. Cooper, who will make it their 
business to show there is something better than a 
ceaseless round of fashionable frivolity; who will 
show to what true and noble uses beautiful homes, 


328 


In Primo. 


and all other beautiful things God has given us, can 
be put! 

This morning Mrs. Cooper said to me: “Miss 
Seymour, we have no intention of burying ourselves 
in solemn seriousness ; we expect to be very much 
alive to all rational, wholesome enjoyments. 
Indeed, we intend to gather about us very much the 
same class of people as those who, with such evident 
pleasure and profit, used to frequent the house when 
you lived there. In fact, we intend to offer some- 
thing rarer, more desirable and more enjoyable, 
than is to be found in the homes of the merely 
wealthy.'’ 

“And you will find yourself a part of a very small 
but excellent company of people, who, occupying the 
first positions in the city, are laboring, as they can, 
towards the same end as yourselves, and by whom 
you will be gladly welcomed,” I replied. 

Unprepossessing as was his first appearance, 
Albert Cooper was well worth saving; he hardly 
seems the same person as the shy, awkward, uncer- 
tain boy, who made his first visit to Sunset Park 
over two years ago, and listened with such amaze- 
ment to my business ideas. He often speaks of that 
time, and declares that whatever there is about him 
that is worthy he owes to the efforts of his wife and 
myself, and that we have made a man of him. Yet 
it seemed such a little thing simply to be kind to 
him, to sympathize with his desires, and to encour- 
age his attempts to reach a higher plane of life. 
He is now an earnest Christian gentleman. 

^ ^ ^ ^ 

After spending two years abroad, Julia returned 


In Primo. 


329 


to America and was married to Mr. Granby at the 
home of Mr. and Mrs. Cooper. As they were both 
desirous of seeing South America, Mr. and Mrs. 
Granby went there on their wedding tour, returning 
the following spring. At this time Parsons was 
married to a merchant who owned a small store in a 
little town in the west. Finding that Parsons hoped 
they might be so prosperous as to enable her, in a 
year or two, to open a millinery shop in connection 
with her husband’s store, Julia furnished the means 
to do'so at once, much to the delight of the grateful 
couple. 

During Julia’s absence from America, many 
changes had taken place, among which was the 
marriage of my brother Richard and Miss Kate 
Holmes. Shortly after Mr. and Mrs. Granby’s 
return from South America, his sister Isabelle was 
married to my brother Edward, thus adding another 
link to the chain of affection between the two fam- 
ilies. Edward continued to act as agent for Mrs. 
Granby, and had worked up quite a law practice. 
His experience as agent, also, led him about this 
time to make a beginning as a real estate dealer, in 
which business he has proved successful. When 
Miss Kate Holmes resigned her position as Julia’s 
special secretary, Miss Nellie Millburn took her 
place. 


CHAPTER XXVII. 


From Julia’s journal I learn that after their mar- 
riage, Mr. Granby told her that from the time he 
first met her at the temperance meeting, five years 
before, he began to look forward to the fitting up of 
a home. Although he never allowed himself to 
hope that she would share it with him, yet he was 
all the time conscious that, as his plans progressed, 
he had her in his mind, and in everything studied 
what her tastes and wishes might be. Accordingly, 
he purchased a sightly place on which he intended 
to build eventually. It commanded a fine view, 
was but a few miles from the city, and accessible 
by convenient trains. 

Much to the regret of his New England friends 
and constituents, Mr. Granby withdrew from polit- 
ical life, believing that by so doing he could be 
more useful and influential in his work of reform. 
But when he decided to leave Boston and begin the 
practice of law in the city of New York, his friends 
were still more disappointed. However, he consid- 
ered that his prospects for success, and the oppor- 
tunities for working along his chosen lines would be 
greater in New York than elsewhere. Moreover, 
Julia preferred New York, inasmuch as she was 
sufficiently acquainted with the possibilities and 
needs of the city to enable her to begin, at once, to 
cooperate with others interested in the public good. 
Besides, most of her acquaintances and friends 
330 


In Primo. 


331 


lived in that city, and she naturally felt more at 
home there. 

Mr. Granby speedily established himself in his 
new field, and at once took his place among the 
foremost men of his profession. 

Notwithstanding the many responsibilities she was 
bearing, Julia still found time to meet her friends 
socially, and ere long, the people who had considered 
her city residence so delightful, found her suburban 
home equally attractive. I take from her journal 
the following entry, made in the early fall after 
her marriage. 

“I do so much enjoy this lovely home, — even 
more than I did Sunset Park. That was a delight- 
ful experience, but there was no one to enjoy it 
with me. Dear Mrs. Rodgers* presence and love 
made it a real home ; yet it was mine and not hers. 
Now, my every home joy is also Howard’s, and 
everything about it is not mine, but ours, and a 
sweet, homelike place it is. 

“What I most enjoy is the beautiful scenery. 
The elevation of ground upon which the house is 
built gives us a fine view of the river, two miles away 
to the east, and of the country beyond it. On the 
other side the sweep of hill, plain, valley and sky, 
gratifies my love of grandeur and sublimity. 

“The ample grounds, with the magnificent great 
trees, the well kept and tastefully arranged flower 
garden, and the wide expanse of country, give a 
sense of spaciousness, freedom and freshness that 
furnish all the delights of rural life, while our 
proximity to the city gives us all the conveniences of 
city life. 


In Primo. 


33 ^ 

“Our home overlooks the pretty, busy village at 
the foot of the hill, from which we are far enough 
away to escape the sound of traffic and travel, but 
near enough to enable us to look down upon the 
pretty cottages, tiny green lawns, the churches and 
school-buildings, with here and there a more pre- 
tentious dwelling, all of which makes us feel the 
neighborhood of people, and prevents any loneliness 
we might otherwise experience. 

“I think we have an ideal house. Everything is 
on a much smaller scale and in a simpler style than 
in the New York residence, but there is no lack of 
grace and refinement in the taste with which our 
handsome parlor, pleasant dining-room and really 
beautiful library are fitted up. Those whom we 
have been privileged to entertain have found our 
guest rooms comfortable, pleasant and airy. 

“As many months as I have lived here, I still feel 
a start of surprise whenever I pass out upon any of 
the many verandas with which our house is sur- 
rounded. I am sure no artist could give so much 
delight as the varied views which the windows of 
our different rooms afford. When planning and 
building the house, Howard made an especial study 
of this, as well as of the arrangement of the verandas. 

“Yes, I am sure ours is the dearest home in the 
world. I would not exchange it for the most palatial 
residence I ever saw. There is nothing about it I 
could wish different. 

“One afternoon, a few weeks ago, Mrs. Bristol 
visited here and greatly amused me by remarking in 
some surprise : 


In Primo. 


333 


“ *I do not know but you look as pretty in your 
simple white muslin home dresses as you used to in 
lace and welvet!’ 

The only subject on which Mr. and Mrs. Granby 
seriously differed was that of her going beyond her 
strength in carrying on her philanthropic work. 
Once, when Mr. Gray was away, and having the 
leisure to do so, I spent an evening at the Granbys'. 
Mrs. Rodgers was also there. Mr. Granby came in 
a few minutes before dinner, and when we were 
seated at the table he said to his wife, “What 
have you been doing all day, my dear?” She 
answered : 

“I went to the city, attended to some business 
there, and then went over to Esther’s and brought 
her home with me.” 

“Well, I thought you had a great deal on hand. 
About eleven o’clock this morning I had occasion to 

drive to street, and there I saw you alignt from 

a car and hasten down street. Two hours later 

I was at , and again saw you descend from the 

cars and pass upstairs. ’ ’ 

“Is that so? I did not see you!” 

“No, I think you were in too great a hurry to see 
any one. About four o’clock I saw you scurrying 
down Broadway as if afraid you would miss the last 
train for home. Happening to know you were busy 
every moment this morning before breakfast, and 
that you had a hard day’s work yesterday going over 
business matters with Thurston, I concluded it was 
time for me to know how many hours constitute a 
day’s work for my wife.” 

Julia colored, hesitated, and then replied: 


334 


In Primo. 


“I could not help it, Howard. I had promised 
personally to look after two poor families in the 
neighborhood where you first saw me ; I also had to 
meet a committee of which I am chairman. The 
appointment was for one o’clock, and I hurried 
because I was late. That over, I took luncheon 
and went down Broadway to see two young men 
concerning some work connected with the Associa- 
tion’s reading-rooms. ' ’ 

“Where next?” 

“To see Esther and bring her home with me. 
Are you not glad?’’ 

Mr. Granby turned to me with a smile, saying: 

“You see, she wants to change the subject.’’ 
Then turning to her he continued: 

“But, Julia, why did you not postpone part of this 
work until to-morrow? And I would like to know 
where you took luncheon. ’ ’ 

Julia looked troubled, and as if she would like to 
avoid this question, as she answered: 

“To-morrow Nellie Millburn will spend the day 
with me.’’ 

“Indeed! Then another day will be given to 
accounts and reports. But where did you lunch?” 

“Oh, Howard, why do you ask so many unneces- 
sary questions?” 

“But where?’’ 

“I could not help it! I did not get out of the 
committee meeting until after three o’clock; so I 

ran into , ordered my luncheon, and had barely 

time to run down Broadway, go to see Esther and 
catch the train by which I wished to come home. ’ ’ 

“Doughnuts and coffee!” 


In Prime. 


33S 


wanted nothing more; and you know that 
there they serve their customers quickly/' 

“You seem quite familiar with the place, so I 
judge this is not your first visit there. But why did 
you not take a carriage instead of walking or going 
on the street car?” 

“Oh, Howard, you know that the streets, leading 
to the place where you first saw me, are so blocked 
by traffic that a carriage cannot get through so 
quickly as the cars ; and T walked down Broadway 
because I had several little errands to attend to ; so 
it was not worth while to take a carriage.” 

“Well, my dear, I know you enjoy this work, and 
I am glad to have you do so much of it as is reason- 
able. But really, I must object to your thus 
crowding your life until these activities become 
positive toil. I cannot have you overdoing in this 
way. ’ ’ 

“I am glad to hear you say so,” joined in Mrs. 
Rodgers. “Julia gives herself no time to rest. 
True, she does not deny herself the pleasure of 
spending her time with you when you are at leisure 
to be here ; but the moment you leave the house she 
has something on hand which demands her imme- 
diate attention. 

“Some one, with sufficient influence to bring about 
the desired effect, should have looked after this 
matter long ago. Even with her perfect health and 
fine constitution, Julia cannot endure such constant 
occupation. But I must confess that I fail to per- 
suade her to do what she is able, and leave the rest 
for some one else.” 

“I would like to know who would have looked 


336 


In Primo. 


after those sick, starving children to-day, if I had 
not done so. I have found that most people leave 
such work for ‘some one else.’ And the committee 
meeting had been twice postponed because neither 
time could I be present,” returned Julia, with 
decided emphasis. 

‘‘There, you see how it is,” continued good, 
motherly Mrs. Rodgers. ‘‘The girl loads herself 
down with work, and then others force her into the 
presidency and secretaryship of I do not know how 
many committees and organizations.” 

By this time Julia looked not only embarrassed, 
but somewhat vexed. But when Mr. Granby 
turned to her with the peculiar smile he never gave 
to any one else, the fire died out of her eyes and the 
unusual color left her cheeks, as she returned his 
smile. 

Julia told me afterwards that when they talked it 
over the next day, Mr. Granby helped her plan a 
way whereby so much of her time would not be 
required as to leave her no leisure for rest. This, 
however, did not end the difficulty, for, like many 
other young people who enjoy exceptional health 
and strength, Julia found it difficult to realize that 
she could overdraw upon these blessings. Hence, 
these discussions were frequently renewed and fol- 
lowed by more carefulness, until some emergency or 
accumulation of work drew her into committing the 
same indiscretion. 

When Julia had been married a little over two 
years, she wrote in her journal: 

‘‘I wonder how much more life holds for me! 
For the last two years it has seemed as if my cup of 


In Primo. 


337 


happiness could contain no more ; but what shall I 
say of the unbounded joy I feel as I clasp my beau- 
tiful boy in my arms? Sometimes it seems as if my 
heart would burst with gladness. He has his 
father’s great dark eyes, and is so perfectly well — 
has never had an ailing moment, and he is a month 
old to-day. I wonder how Howard can bear to be 
away from him a moment! Yet I know he feels as 
deeply as I do, although he does not express himself 
in the torrent of words I cannot repress. Oh, my 
beautiful, beautiful boy! 

“I can now sympathize with Esther in her tender- 
ness for her delicate, fairy-like, little three-year-old 
daughter. But Esther has a constant fear lest her 
frail little snowdrop, whom in my honor she calls 
Julia, shall not long grace the earth. Oh, how 
could I live if I thought my boy would be taken 
from me? But hush, — I must not say that. As 
Esther tells me, ‘God knows best,’ and He makes no 
mistakes; and yet, what should I do? I must pray 
for grace to bear my joy, and remain submissive and 
trustful in the knowledge that my boy’s highest 
good is in the Heavenly Father’s hands. 

“I wanted to name our boy Howard, but his 
father insisted on naming him Seymour. 

“Mrs. Rodgers will be in soon, and as she does 
not like to have me write, I must stop. But I had 
to give expression to what I feel.” 

A year before this, at Julia’s earnest request, Mrs. 
Rodgers had come to live with her. She claimed 
the right to have Mrs. Rodgers with her a part of 
the time, instead of her remaining always with 
Mrs. Kate Berkely. 


338 


In Primo. 


When her baby was two months old Julia made 
the following entry in her journal: 

“To-day our son was baptized, and for the first 
time I have felt that I could really give him up to 
God for life or for death, — for anything that my 
Heavenly Father’s love should decree. With this, 
great peace and quietness have come into my soul. 
I no longer fear what may be, for I know that all 
will be well. 

“I love my boy more now than I could have under- 
stood even a month ago, for this deep, strong, 
unmeasured love seems to take hold upon eternal 
things. I can express it in no other way, — and 
there is nothing in this affection that is not in per- 
fect harmony with my loving God supremely. The 
wild idolatry I felt a month ago, is gone, — and 
oh, the sweetness of the love that has taken its 
place ! 

“I feel that this child belongs to God, but has 
been sent to bless my life for so long a time as it 
shall please the Father to leave him with me. 
Should he be removed to Heaven before myself, 
the blessing he has brought me must remain, 
and the hope of re-union hereafter makes Heaven 
a brighter prospect, whether my child or I shall 
first reach its shores. I have wonderful peace and 
rest. * * 

Some months after this, one day when Julia was 
at my home, looking so well and happy, I gave 
expression to a thought that flashed through my 
mind, saying: 

“Julia, have you ever thought of the possibility 
of your being taken to Heaven suddenly and unex- 


In Prime. 


339 


pectedly? Have you thought of the advisability of 
having everything in order in case such a thing 
should occur?” 

“Oh, yes,” she replied, brightly, “soon after 
Seymour was baptized Howard spoke of it, and 
everything is ready. But I hope to live long enough 
to be my own administrator as far as my property 
is concerned, and during my life to bestow most of 
it where I would like to have it go.” 

I again copy from the journal: 

“Yesterday Seymour was two years old. Mrs. 
Cooper came to see us, bringing her two boys. She 
also has a little daughter a few months old. 
Albert, the eldest, is four years old, and is much 
like his mother. He is a slight, nervous child, and 
quivers with excitement, while the color comes 
and goes in his face just as it does in hers; he 
is constantly in motion. This seems to annoy 
his mother, who remarked with considerable satis- 
faction : 

“ ‘Ernest is not a bit like Albert. He is so quiet 
you would never know there was a child in the 
house. Isn’t he fair?’ 

“ ‘Yes,’ I replied, ‘very fair.’ 

“I was glad she asked the question in such a 
form, for I think Albert, with his dark eyes and 
active mind and body, much the more interesting 
child. Little Ernest is two years old, and has the 
whitest hair I ever saw, — soft and fine as silk, — so 
white one can hardly distinguish the line where it 
separates from his extremely fair face ; his cheeks 
are pink with health, and he has his father’s placid 
blue eyes, slow movements and contented disposi- 


340 


In Primo. 


tion. He is a great contrast to Seymour, who is 
brown as a berry, with very dark hair and eyes, and 
his cheeks are as red as roses. Seymour, while not 
a nervous child, is very active, and made great 
exertions to induce Ernest to join him in play with 
his toys. But Ernest only stared at him with wide- 
open eyes and mouth, and seemed to hear nothing. 
When his mother stood him on his feet he remained 
standing just where she placed him, his only move- 
ment being to put into his mouth the piece of cake 
he was holding. Mrs. Cooper looked at him with 
great complacency, and I knew she was contrasting 
him with my dark-eyed laddie, giving the favor to 
her own plump, blue-eyed boy. I suppose his quiet 
nature is restful to one of her intense, active 
temperament. But I am well content with my 
sturdy rogue, who is just now coaxing me to play 
riding in the cars with him. ” 

Later, Julia wrote in her journal: 

“For the past few days my heart has been so full 
of pain I have been unable to write. The other 
morning we received a telegram saying, ‘The angels 
came last night and took our little Julia away. Can 
you come to us ? ’ Hardly realizing what I did, 
I accompanied Howard and Mrs. Rodgers to 
Esther’s home. ‘Oh,’ I thought, ‘what shall I say 
to Esther? How can I bear this trouble that has 
come to her?’ Thus trying to compose my thoughts 
and prepare to be of some comfort to our stricken 
friends, I entered her room. Surely, in passing, 
the angels must have touched the bereaved mother, 
for I never saw such calm, peaceful, holy sub- 
mission as was in Esther’s face. I forgot all and 


In Prime. 


341 


just rushed into her arms. Instead of comforting 
her she turned comforter to me. 

“ ‘Why, child,’ she said, ‘why do you look so 
white and terror-stricken? Have you forgotten that 
my little blossom is safe with Jesus, never more to 
suffer pain and sickness?’ 

“ ‘Oh, Esther,’ I gasped, ‘that your child should 
be taken! I could endure it were it some other; 
but how can I bear to have you so bereft?’ 

“This side of heaven I shall never see anything 
sweeter than the smile with which Esther turned to 
me, saying: 

“ ‘Julia, I am not bereft; my child still lives, is 
still mine, mine eternally. I saw something last 
week that I could not have borne had it come to me. 
A beautiful girl, who had drifted into a bad life, 
returned to her mother only in time to die, leaving 
no hope of her hereafter. I would have mourned 
all my life had my child lived and become like that, 
and then died without manifesting the least desire 
for anything better than her life had been ; turning 
in bitterness from all who tried to direct her 
thoughts to eternal things, — only faintly answer- 
ing: 

“ ‘ “I do not care for these things now, — I did 
when I was a little girl, — but now I do not enjoy 
being with good people, so how can I care for 
heaven?’’ With these words she passed out into the 
beyond. 

“ ‘How can I be thankful enough that the dark, 
bad part of this world has never touched my darling, 
but that I have given her back to God as pure as 
when He sent her to me!’ 


342 


In Primo. 


“And I was comforted. I do not understand why, 
but I have never found it an easy thing to be willing 
that trouble should touch Esther. At this point I 
have failed hitherto. There is more that I need to 
have God do for me.“ 




CHAPTER XXVIII. 


Seymour was three years old when Julia’s second 
son was born. Of this she wrote in her journal: 

“And they say this sweet, blue-eyed boy looks like 
me ! Be that as it may, he is a most lovable child. 
Something about him so appeals to my tenderest 
affection that I can hardly endure to have him out 
of my sight for a moment. There must be a great 
deal of room in a mother’s heart. It used to seem 
to me that Seymour so filled mine that I never could 
give another child so much love as I did him ; but I 
love this fair-faced boy, with hair like sunshine, just 
as much. Yet he does not seem to reach down so 
deep into my being, and take hold upon my very life, 
as my first-born does. Strange to say, this child 
seems to have taken a stronger hold upon his father 
than even Seymour. We were talking of the mys- 
tery of these things with Mrs. Rodgers, and she says 
it is nothing unusual ; for while we do not love one 
child more than another, yet the special needs of our 
natures often find a more pronounced response from 
one than from the others; hence we feel a stronger 
sympathy with each other. 

“We have named this son Howard.’’ 

A year later I was spending the day with Julia, 
when Mrs. Phillips called. Tn the course of conver- 
sation she said: 

“Really, Mrs. Granby, I wonder how you can be 
willing to confine yourself so closely to domestic 
affairs. You keep but two servants besides that 

343 


344 


In Prime. 


little twelve-year-old girl who helps to look after the 
children. Do you think it right thus to narrow your 
life?” 

“I do not understand you,” returned Julia. “In 
what way do my home duties seem to narrow my 
life?” 

“Why, even with your laundry work done out of 
the house, — with so few servants, you must be left 
with many household duties to look after. It seems, 
too, that you take most of the care of your children. 
All this must leave you very little time to enjoy 
yourself. ’ ’ 

“Oh, but I enjoy looking after our home; and the 
pleasure of taking care of my children I could never 
give up to a hired nurse. So far from considering 
this work narrowing, I feel that nothing has so 
deepened my enjoyment of life, and so broadened 
my sympathies, as my boys. 

“Moreover, nothing ever so stimulated me to 
effort, — I never so felt the necessity for spiritual 
culture, mental development, and home refinement, 
as since I became the mother of these children. I 
find my resources taxed to the utmost since they are 
here to be influenced by my life, and trained by my 
teaching. 

“And this is not all, for there is more to be con- 
sidered than my own comfort, happiness and benefit. 
I want to be a comfort to them. When they are 
men I want their sweetest memories to cluster 
around myself. I want the home influence for good 
to follow them as long as they live. ” 

“But you are kept at home so closely; you have 
so little time to go out in society.” 


In Prime. 


345 


“I am afraid I have little sympathy with women 
who complain on that account. I do not understand 
them. For my part, I enjoy the companionship of 
my husband and children more than any I can find 
outside my home. I cannot see where the dragging 
down and narrowing, so often complained of, are to 
be found. ” 

“But do you not think the outside world has some 
claim upon you?’’ 

“Certainly, and I conscientiously try to meet this 
claim. Indeed, I go out into society as much now 
as I did during the first two years of my married 
life.’’ 

“And are you able to give as much time as for- 
merly to charitable and religious work, for which you 
always have had such a passion?’’ 

“I have not been obliged to give up any of my 
personal work among the poor. Since my own boys 
came to bless my life, and to teach me more of the 
needs of childhood and the yearnings of mother- 
hood, my sympathy with unfortunate, helpless chil- 
dren, and toiling, troubled, suffering mothers, is 
greatly quickened and intensified. I find I can do 
more really helpful work in less time and with less 
outlay of effort than formerly. 

“To our work of general philanthropy Miss Mill- 
burn has proved herself especially well adapted. 
Then Mr. Granby’s sister, Mrs. Edward Berkely, is 
interested in all these things, and we plan and work 
together, thus accomplishing more than we could 
working separately. Mr. Granby is a tower of 
strength to me. His wide experience, and power of 
grasping a situation quickly, enable him to help me 


346 


In Primo. 


greatly in simplifying the work, and thus making 
the most of time and opportunity. ’ ’ 

“I suppose Mrs. Rodgers is a great help to 
you?” 

”Oh, it almost seems as if I could not do without 
her. She is like a mother to us. Indeed, at her 
own request the children call her grandmamma, and 
she loves them as much as if they were her grand- 
children. 

“Yes, when it is necessary for me to be away from 
home I feel no anxiety about the boys. But I some- 
times grudge the time I must spend away from my 
darlings.” 

“Well, I half believe you are right, and that you 
are really getting more out of life than many of us 
who are making such a constant study of reducing 
to a minimum our home cares, so that we may have 
more time for our fashionable society life. 

“Then, too, I notice that many people seem to be 
giving more attention to questions relating to society, 
and are beginning to express much the same opin- 
ions as you have always held. Only, you know, so 
many have accustomed themselves to a certain mode 
of living, and there seems no way nor place to make 
a change. ” 

“Yes, I can see how that is; but if we only can 
influence young people, who are just beginning life, 
to start right, we shall accomplish a great deal. * ’ 

“Even then, they so often begin life hampered by 
plans which their parents have made for them, that 
it is difficult to overcome their unfavorable circum- 
stances and environments. Do you remember that 
Miss Hamilton you met one evening at Mrs. Bris- 


In Primo. 


347 


tol’s, several years ago, and who was so interested 
in that remarkable discussion?” 

“Yes, and I have often wondered as to her 
whereabouts. I liked her very much.” 

“Oh, the family spent a great deal of time abroad. 
They have returned to America, and a few months 
ago Miss Hamilton was married to Mr. Francis, the 
young millionaire. It seems she has some uncon- 
ventional ideas of life, with which her husband 
sympathizes. But her father-in-law, the elder Mr. 
Francis, simply forbade any innovations, and 
declared he would have no following after the 
Granbys and Coopers. They say there has been 
considerable family trouble, but it looks as if the 
father had triumphed, for the young people are 
settled in a brown stone front, and are going the 
usual rounds of fashionable life.” 

“I am sorry for them,” said Julia, “but if they 
are in earnest they will find their way out of this 
labyrinth. ’ ’ 

“I suppose so, but you see, it is not easy for every 
one to do as you have done, — your case has been 
quite exceptional.” 

“Yes, I know things have been comparatively easy 
for me. I have often wondered why I have so little 
trouble. ’ ’ 

All this while I had been listening, but now I 
said: 

“I have heard Mrs. Rodgers remark that it is 
because you have been so sincerely intent upon 
knowing and doing the will of God. 

“But wherein has young Mrs. Francis failed, that 
she should have such trouble?” 


348 


In Primo. 


“I know nothing about her beyond what I have 
heard from you. One thing, however, is certain. 
Had she and her husband considered everything as 
carefully before they were married, as did Mr. and 
Mrs. Granby, she would have found out in what her 
connection with the Francis family was likely to 
involve her, and knowing this, if she chose to enter 
the family, she would have no cause of complaint 
or dissatisfaction concerning conditions which she 
previously understood.’* 

“Yes, that is true, and this should be a warning 
to other young people who wish to carry out their 
convictions.” 

After Mrs. Phillips’ departure I said to Julia: 

“I think Mrs. Phillips is right about a growing 
interest in questions relating to social life, and also 
in the sort of work in which you are so much 
engaged. I believe that your example, and that of 
others like you, is bearing abundant and good fruit, 
proving in a most satisfactory way the truth of the 
promise, ‘Cast thy bread upon the waters, for thou 
shalt find it after many days. ’ ’ ’ 

A few days afterward Mrs. Bristol came to see 
Julia, and, as usual, rallied her upon what she was 
pleased to call her eccentric mode of life, and 
exclaimed : 

“Really, I do not believe you have been to a ball 
since you joined the Methodists!” 

“When I came to spend the winter with you,” 
answered J ulia, ‘ ‘ 1 was already in accord with Metho- 
dist doctrine, and approved of most of the rules of 
that church, but was uncertain whether I could 
sanction its restrictions concerning amusements, and 


In Primo. 


349 


thought it dishonorable to join a church to the rules 
of which I could not assent. My first season in 
New York convinced me that the Methodists had 
taken the correct position on the subject of amuse- 
ments. 

“For these reasons, before going abroad, I joined 
the little church at Hampton, of which I remained a 
member until I came here, when I presented my 
letter of membership and joined the church in the 
village near us.” 

“Well, even if I did not dance myself,” said Mrs. 
Bristol, “I would prefer a more liberal church than 
the Methodist. Why does it make such rules when 
other churches, as remarkable for their piety, do not 
presume to interfere with the freedom of their 
members?” 

“There may be few churches besides the Metho- 
dist that have such rules, but I assure you that we 
are not the only people who do not approve of 
such amusements. In New York, and when 
traveling, I have met many who were members of 
other churches. I recall acquaintances who are 
among the most earnest workers in these churches, 
who take the same position on the subject of amuse- 
ments that I do. I have heard of a bishop in the 
Episcopal Church who refused to lay hands upon 
candidates for confirmation if they indulged in 
dancing. You see, this is not a peculiarity of 
Methodist people.” 

“Yes, the clergyman now preaching in our church 
is talking on this line, but he does not presume to 
enforce his views among his people. ” 

“Well, if I, and others, prefer to belong to a church 


350 


In Priino. 


that is agreed upon this matter of amusements, why 
should we not have the privilege of doing so? By 
this we interfere with the privileges of no one, for 
those who differ from us in opinion are at liberty to 
go elsewhere. I must confess I have very little 
respect for those who join our church, knowing the 
rules and preferences of our people, and then 
attempt to change those rules, or failing that, break 
them. It seems to me a serious infringement upon 
the rights of others.” 

“What will you do when your boys grow up and 
want to dance?” 

“Very early, we began a course of training with 
our children, calculated to instill such principles 
as will cause them to feel that the spirit of the 
ball-room is not in harmony with that of Chris- 
tianity. 

“In the second place, we intend to give them such 
education and culture as will so develop their char- 
acter and intellect, and so inspire them with lofty 
ideals, that not only will they have no taste for these 
light and questionable amusements, but will find 
them so thoroughly unsatisfactory as entertainments, 
that they will consider nothing so irksome as the 
necessity, — could there be one, — of participating in 
them. 

“In the third place, when our children are old 
enough to reason, we shall explain to them our 
objections to these things. 

“With divine direction and help, for which we 
daily pray, we believe that by such a course we shall 
see our boys grow up into manhood not dependent 
upon such trivialities for their enjoyment. 


In Primo. 


351 


“All this training and education includes a 
preparation of mind and heart that is intended to 
lead them, early, to take hold upon things that are 
eternal. I would not like to spend all this time 
fitting them simply to live a few years in this world, 
and neglect their interests in the world where they 
are to spend the cycles of eternity.” 

“Perhaps, however, after all you can do, they 
maybe like you, and want to find out for themselves 
whether these things are objectionable.” 

“Mr. Granby comes of old Puritan stock. As far 
back as the family history is known, there is no 
record of any one who found the ball-room, and its 
associate places of amusements, attractive. We hope 
our children have inherited this quality. 

“As for myself, you must remember that my case 
was somewhat peculiar. Before I was ten years old 
I had been taught certain principles that made me 
ready to do whatever was shown to be right. Until 
I met Mrs. Gray at Fledding I received no further 
directly moral or religious instruction; Even after 
that, my life was so isolated, that, had any one pre- 
sented such questions relating to my duty to the 
outside world, I could not have understood them. 

“Therefore, when I reached Sunset Park, I was as 
inexperienced and ignorant as if I had just 
descended from one of the planets. The question 
soon came before me, but people so differed in opin- 
ion on the subject, and those who objected to these 
amusements gave such unsatisfactory reasons for 
doing so, that I decided to investigate for myself. 

‘ ‘ Had any one told me what I can now explain, 
and what you heard me talk of when I was in your 


352 


In Primo. 


home, I should never have doubted a moment that 
the ball-room held nothing I needed or desired. 

“Anxious not to fail in my duty to society and the 
world at large, I came to New York for a season of 
fashionable life. As you know, I was not long in 
learning that such a life did not meet my ideas of 
the way in which I ought to spend my time and 
strength.” 

“But did Mrs. Rodgers never explain what you 
say you are going to explain to your boys?” 

“I must again remind you of my peculiar 
position. ’ ’ 

“Well, Mrs. Granby, we shall expect your sons to 
grow up very serious, sedate young men. I suppose 
that even now they never laugh nor get into mis- 
chief.” 

“Oh, don’t think for a moment that they do not 
have plenty of fun! It is well we have no near 
neighbors, or they might feel themselves scandalized 
by witnessing our frolics. But our amusements are 
of such a character that, many times, when in the 
midst of them, Mr. Granby says : 

“ ‘See, it is the boys’ bedtime, let us have 
prayers. ’ 

“Calling the household together, we then ask our 
Heavenly Father’s blessing upon us all, and even 
upon our pastimes. 

“I fancy, Mrs. Bristol, few ball-room guests are in 
a frame of mind that would enable them, at a 
moment’s notice, to cease dancing, kneel down and 
ask God’s blessing upon themselves and what they 
were engaged in a moment before. Or, imagine 
them coming home at four o’clock in the morning, 


In Primo. 


353 


calling the household together to give thanks to God 
for the blessings and enjoyments of their lives, and 
then going to their rooms to sleep until it is time to 
prepare for the next entertainment.” 

“I am glad your children are so proper and satis- 
factory in their behavior.” 

“You maybe sure they are not model children. 
They have such streaks of badness ! But do you not 
see that is one of the strongest reasons why we 
should most earnestly, and persistently, pursue the 
course of which I have told you? We are obliged to 
do it if we would keep our children from being 
ruined at the very beginning.” 

“My! What dreadful things do they do?” 

“Seymour is a very determined, positive child, so 
bent on having his own way that he sometimes dis- 
obeys our most emphatic commands. Even little 
Howard sometimes taxes our patience to the utmost 
of endurance. He is intense and excitable, becom- 
ing so absorbed in whatever interests or pleases him, 
that sometimes we have to use really severe meas- 
ures to make him understand that he must think of 
others and remember to obey. 

“Mrs. Rodgers laughs, and says he is just like I 
was when I was so busy with all sorts of work. 
When Mr. Granby wants to tease me, he compares 
Howard to myself by referring to the way I rushed 
through things the first two years after I came 
here. He says we must wait for Howard to under- 
stand, what I have nearly learned, — that more can 
be accomplished when we do not undertake too 
much.” 

“I should like to see you administer discipline! 


354 


In Prime. 


What do you do? Do you suppose the children 
know when they are punished?” asked Mrs. Bristol, 
with an amused laugh, in which Julia merrily joined, 
replying : 

“I punish them in the old-fashioned way my 
mother and grandmother employed.” 

“And does Mr. Granby take a share in this house- 
hold government? What are his methods?” 

“I have never asked any questions, but from 
remarks the children make, I think a little willow 
switch is successful in bringing about the desired 
results. ’ ’ 

“I never should have dreamed of such a thing,” 
continued Mrs. Bristol, still laughing. “Will you 
not invite me over when something of the sort is 
going on? I would rather witness that, than attend 
the finest concert ever given in New York.” 

“No, indeed! Such performances are quite pri- 
vate, and rarely referred to afterwards. We are 
most careful about this, for among other things we 
wish to foster self-respect in our children. To do 
this we must show respect for their feelings. 

“But they are not all bad! They are most gener- 
ous, kind-hearted little fellows, and seem to be 
naturally truthful, perfectly so, I think. I never 
knew anything — the loss of anticipated pleasure, or 
the prospect of certain punishment — to cause them 
to swerve from what was strictly true. 

“Then, too, young as they are, they seem to be 
religiously inclined. Since Seymour was one year 
old, I have made a practice of taking him alone every 
day and praying for him. Now Howard accom- 
panies us. I feel that they understand what it 


In Primo. 


355 


means, for sometimes when Seymour is not behav- 
ing well, I say to him, ‘I think you would better go 
and pray’; and he always drops everything and 
runs to his room, Howard, of course, following him. 
Standing near the door I have seen them kneel side 
by side, and heard little Seymour's voice as he 
prayed; and although I am not near enough to 
understand what he says, the Lord hears, for he 
always comes back quiet and good. 

“With these characteristics to work upon, we feel 
that all is possible for our boys, as far as develop- 
ing them into true and noble manhood is con- 
cerned. ’ ’ 

“Yes, I see you are likely to go on your way to 
the end of the chapter; and I am as little likely to 
change as yourself; I, too, am accomplishing the 
ambition of my life, which, as you know, is to be a 
leader in New York society, and I thoroughly enjoy 
my triumph. But you have no such ambition for 
yourself and children. ’ ’ 

“No. My supreme ambition for them and for 
myself, reaches beyond the bounds of time and 
mortality, on through the eternal years of God, — 
there to be ever, and yet ever growing into the per- 
fection made possible for us, through the love of 
Christ.” 

“Yes, and you will reach it!” replied Mrs. Bristol, 
in the most serious manner I ever heard her speak. 
“You will accomplish your ambition, and sometimes 
you almost stir me to imitate your example.” Kiss- 
ing Julia, she bade her good-night. 

When she was gone Julia said: 

“If I could only see Mrs. Bristol getting the best 


356 


In Prime. 


out of life, and devoting her really superior powers 
to the noblest ends, it seems just now as if I could 
ask for little more. I have always loved the 
woman.'* 


CHAPTER XXIX. 


Thus for another year in the Granby family life 
passed peacefully, happily and uneventfully, filled 
with duties that grew more precious as the good thus 
wrought was more fully understood. 

Early the next winter Julia found her home cares 
greatly increased, for her hitherto healthy children, 
sharing the fate common to childhood, passed 
through a siege of whooping-cough. Seymour did 
not suffer much, and beyond the necessity for care- 
fulness to avoid his taking cold, he gave little extra 
trouble. But little Howard was seriously ill, and 
caused his parents and Mrs. Rodgers no small con- 
cern. This anxiety, the close confinement and 
nights of broken rest, wore upon Julia until her hus- 
band and friends were apprehensive lest the out- 
come be more unfavorable for her than for the 
children. 

But when, at the end of three months, measles 
came to distress the household still further, leaving 
both children, Howard especially, pale and weak, 
Julia began to look like an invalid herself. To 
augment the trouble, one bitter cold night early in 
March, Julia was aroused by Howard’s hoarse 
coughing, and fearing croup, she ran hastily through 
the hall to call Mrs. Rodgers, and returned to her 
room. By this time she was thoroughly chilled, but 
giving no further attention to herself than simply to 
draw on a dressing-gown, she directed her whole 

357 


358 


In Primo, 


thought and effort to relieve her baby, who, between 
his choking struggles, clung frantically to his mother. 

They worked for two hours. The most alarming 
symptoms over, Mrs. Rodgers became conscious of 
Julia’s danger and insisted on her returning to bed 
at once, while she applied such remedies as were at 
hand to ward off the cold, which Julia’s already 
husky voice showed she had taken. 

The next day, though tired and languid, Julia 
was around as usual. But Mrs. Rodgers was 
uneasy about her and very glad when Mr. Granby, 
who had been hastily summoned to the bedside of 
his invalid brother, returned. Mr. Granby insisted 
on calling a physician at once, although Julia 
declared that she was really better than she had 
been for some time. Indeed, she seemed to have 
recovered her usual spirits and persistently busied 
herself about the home; but the color that burned 
in her cheeks was not the old-time flush of health, 
and her increasing weakness gave serious cause for 
anxiety. 

When April came, we, as well as the physician, 
realized that not only was her disease fatal, but that 
we could hope to keep her only a few weeks longer at 
the most. The spring was unusually early, but the 
bright sunshine and gentle breezes that brought 
strength and vigor back to the children and made 
the green grass start up on the lawn, only seemed 
to hasten Julia more rapidly from her earthly home 
and friends. 

Julia was well aware of what awaited her, but it 
made no change in her quiet, cheerful life. She 
spoke as naturally of her speedy departure as she 


In Prime. 


359 


had of her plans when about to start for Europe. 
One day Mrs. Rodgers said to her: 

“My dear, your calm, happy spirit is a great com- 
fort to us all. In the years to come we shall look 
upon these last precious days with great thankful- 
ness. “ 

Julia turned her unusually bright eyes upon Mrs. 
Rodgers, and with a clear, steady look, replied : 

“And why should these not be happy, restful days 
for us all? As far as I myself am concerned, years 
ago I trusted all in the hands of God, and have been 
more than satisfied with the way He has rewarded 
my trust ; and I have great peace as I look forward 
to the future. ’ ’ Pausing a moment, she continued : 

“I am glad this peace, although stronger and 
deeper than ever before, is not new to me, — that I 
have had it for years. Were it otherwise, I should 
fear it was one of the deceptive characteristics com- 
mon to my malady. But I know it is not this, for in 
the days of health and strength I proved what it 
means to have ‘peace like a river,’— the ‘peace that 
passeth understanding.’ ’’ 

“This is the sweetest memory you can leave with 
us, that the same faith that has actuated your life 
abides with you now. But, Julia, if it is not a pain- 
ful subject, will you tell me how you feel about part- 
ing with Howard and the children?’’ 

With a sweet, quiet smile she replied: 

“It is a long time since I have had any dread of 
the changes our Heavenly Father may, in His wis- 
dom, send to us. I have no fear but all will be done 
in the way that will work out to be most for His 
glory, and our highest good, No, I have perfect 


360 


In Primo. 


rest of mind concerning things on earth and things 
in heaven. 

“Of course,” and the sweet face took on a grave 
look, “I cannot help feeling sorry for Howard. I 
cannot help seeing what this parting is to him. But 
I know that God loves and pities him more than I 
can, so I know that it is not wrong for me to sym- 
pathize with him and feel sorry for him. But I also 
know that God will bless and comfort him beyond 
anything of which we have any conception. ’ ’ 

After resting a moment she went on : 

“Now, this is the way I feel about the future. I 
know that Howard is the Lord’s, and that having 
kept him thus far. He will keep him to the end. 
Howard will go right on, leading an earnest, conse- 
crated, useful life, and at the end, which to me seems 
only a little way off, we shall be together again. 

“As for the children, — well,. you know, I think I 
did a great thing for my children when I married 
their father, in that I complied with the scriptural 
injunction, ‘Be ye not unequally yoked together. ’ A 
dying mother must have food for much unhappy 
thought over leaving her children to the care of an 
unchristian father. 

“When our children were born, Howard and I 
committed them to God, and we have been united 
in our efforts to bring them up ‘in the fear and 
admonition of the Lord. ’ Now my part of this work 
is done, and as I leave husband and children in His 
hands, I can trust Him to guide and help Howard as 
he takes up his work alone, just as He has guided 
and helped us in the past.” For a time Julia 
seemed lost in thought, and then began again ; 


In Primo. 


361 

“Mistakes I may have made in the management 
of family matters, but God knew I tried to do what 
would please Him and has graciously overruled 
them. Therefore, with nothing of the past to trouble 
me, the present and future I trust to His love.“ 

In subsequent conversations Julia asked Mrs. 
Rodgers if she would be willing to remain in the 
home, and help Mr. Granby take care of her boys 
until they grew to manhood, should she and they be 
spared so long. To this Mrs. Rodgers sadly con- 
sented, and they spent much time talking over plans 
for the future, Julia freely expressing what she 
wished and hoped for her children. 

One morning, as she lay on a couch that had been 
drawn up to a window where she could look out 
beyond the river, and enjoy the sight of budding 
trees and springing grass, Julia said to me: 

“Esther, but one thing troubles me; it so hurts 
me to see the grief in Howard’s face. He tries to 
hide it from me and to talk with me cheerfully, as 
in the past, but some way I love him so much it 
seems as if I could feel his very thoughts. I know 
his trust in God is firm, but this separation from me 
is breaking his heart. 

“There are some things which it would be a relief 
to talk over with him more fully than I have done, 
but when I begin to speak, in spite of his strongest 
effort, his face grows so white, — so tense and drawn 
with the pain he feels, that I have not the heart to 
pursue the subject. So I would like to talk over 
these matters with you, if you do not mind. You 
know that next to Howard you are my dearest 
friend. ’’ 


362 


lu Primo. 


Having assured her that I was glad to do anything 
that would give her comfort, she told me of many 
little things she would like to have done when she 
was gone; also, of little keepsakes she would like 
delivered to many of those whom she called her 
people ; and mentioned many other things that were 
of a personal and sacred character. 

Then she spoke of the disposition she had made of 
her property, saying she had provided for the sup- 
port of many charitable and philanthropic institu- 
tions, and for Mr. Gray’s work. When I remarked 
upon the completeness of her arrangements, she 
replied : 

“Oh, don’t you remember, once, when you were 
speaking of my extraordinarily good health, and 
asked if I had ever thought of the possibility of 
being unexpectedly called from this world, that I 
told you I had, and that all was in readiness for my 
Lord to come? So there has been little to do by 
way of final preparations, for I had thought it all 
out long before I was sick. To a great extent, I 
have fulfilled my wish to become my own executor, 
and most of my money is bestowed where I would 
have it. 

“Perhaps,’’ she continued, “you would like to 
know something about what we have done regarding 
family matters. Of course I wanted to make some 
special provision for my husband. True, he makes 
a great deal of money by his profession, but one 
never knows what may occur. When I spoke to 
him about this, and of my desire to leave him at least 
twenty-five thousand dollars with the understanding 
that it should never be spent, except for his own 


In Primo. 


363 


personal use, he said that while he felt quite sure 
he would never need the money, yet, if it would be 
any comfort to me, he would most willingly con- 
sent to my doing so, and promised to use it only as 
I had requested. 

“I have also left my boys twenty-five thousand 
dollars each. Howard will support and educate 
them, so that by the time they are twenty-one years 
old, the interest that will accrue, added to the prin- 
cipal, will give them each a good capital. Of this 
Howard also approves. He says that if they grow 
up the sort of men we hope and believe they will, 
this will be more than sufficient to start them in 
life.” 

“But do you not think,” I asked, “that this may 
impress others as indicating a weakness of faith on 
your part? Will it not seem as if you do not alto- 
gether trust God to keep your boys in the right way, 
and to direct them in a wise use of all this money 
you have thus placed beyond their reach?” 

“Logical people will not form such conclusions. 
Whatever I might do, unreasonable people would 
misunderstand. 

“When this property came into my possession, I 
consecrated myself and all I owned to the service 
of God. 

“All I expended upon myself before marriage was 
in preparation to make the best use of my wealth. 
Since my marriage none of it has been spent upon 
myself or family. 

“I feel it is right to make the provision I have 
mentioned for my husband and children. Beyond 
this, I must render back to God the trust He 


364 


In Prime. 


gave me. It has been simply a question of how to 
do it. 

“While God does promise me that He will care 
for and guide^them, He does not assure me that my 
sons will live to grow up; or if they do, that they 
will be able to manage so large a property. It may 
be, too, that like their father, they will choose a line 
of work in which they will prefer to be unimeum- 
bered with wealth. Or, as was the case with the 
property of the grandfather of grandmamma Whit- 
tington, it may pass from them into unworthy hands. 

“Therefore, by devoting it to causes which I have 
studied, I have made sure of the money being used 
to benefit the world. ’ ’ 

“All this is true, and should your boys not become 
such men as you hope they may, the money they - 
will have will be more than enough for them. ’ ’ 

“I have no misgivings as to that.” 

“Neither have I. I am speaking on general prin- 
ciples that all parents would do well to consider.” 

“Yes, I understand. I have also left Mrs. Rodgers 
twenty-five thousand dollars and provided for Nellie 
Millburn. And Esther, dear Esther, I have left 
twenty-five thousand dollars for your personal use. 
You will not refuse me this last wish for you?” 

I could not resist the pleading manner in which 
she said this, so I consented to her request. She 
seemed quite wearied now, and with a satisfied, 
happy expression, soon fell into a restful sleep. 

This quiet life went on until early May. One 
morning Mrs. Bristol came quietly in, looking 
unusually grave, and appeared to be nerving herself 
for the occasion. This seemed nothing strange, for 


In Primo. 


36s 


we all felt that a few hours at the most would bring 
the close of this beautiful life here. Julia had 
appeared weaker this morning, and was lying with 
closed eyes, but looked up as Mrs. Bristol entered, 
and smiled the welcome she seemed too languid 
to speak. Mrs. Bristol went softly to her side, 
saying : 

“I would like to tell her something. Do you 
think she is able to hear me? I will not be long.” 

Mrs. Rodgers and I rose to leave the room, but 
Mrs. Bristol raised her hand to detain us, and 
hastily said: 

“No, what I have to say I want you all to hear.” 
Then turning to Julia, she proceeded: 

“Mrs. Granby, I have hastened here this morning, 
fearing I might be too late, to tell you that after a 
hard struggle of weeks’ duration, I have at last 
decided to live for nobler things than I have hitherto 
sought, — to begin life all over again, and try to be 
like you in my ambitions and efforts. I can never 
be to the world and to my friends just what you have 
been — I have begun too late for that. But even so, 
I feel that God has accepted me, and will make of 
me and the remainder of my life the best that is pos- 
sible. My husband joins me in this, and asked me 
to tell you that he too feels he is now a child of 
God.” 

The look of exceeding joy that shone in Julia’s 
face startled us all, for it seemed greater than her 
frail frame could bear. In a low voice she replied : 

“Please sing that hymn with the chorus, ‘We’ll 
carry the tidings home, ’ ’ ’ which we, with difficulty, 
did. Then lifting her almost transparent hands. 


366 


In Primo. 


with an effort she placed her arms around Mrs. 
Bristol’s neck, saying: 

“God knows all about this now, but as soon as I 
get home I’ll tell this great good news over and 
over again.” Then embracing her, Mrs. Bristol 
withdrew. 

It had been a glorious day, upon which Julia had 
several times remarked. As the afternoon wore on 
the room seemed flooded with sunshine. Mrs. 
Rodgers, Mrs. Willard, Mr. Granby and I- sat near, 
intently watching beside her; she seemed to have 
fallen into a sweet, restful slumber. After a few 
minutes Mrs. Willard made a movement directing 
our attention to her, and we saw that her pure spirit 
had taken its flight, leaving but its casket behind. 
But what a beautiful casket ! So fair, so sweet and 
youthful looked the waxen face, so childlike the 
angelic smile, that a few hours later it was decided 
by those who could think about such preparations, 
that only a white receptacle and a white velvet pall, 
with delicate blue forget-me-nots embroidered in the 
corners, with the same delicate blossoms placed in 
the white hands, were appropriate. 

We will not linger over these details. We all felt 
that any ostentation would be unseemly, and only 
the members of the Granby family who could leave 
their homes at the time, and Julia’s most intimate 
friends were present during the last rites. But the 
wreaths and clusters of flowers that found their 
way to the house testified to the many loving 
friends whose hearts were moved in sadness with 
our own. Some of these floral tributes touched us 
deeply, for they came from poor people, whose 


In Primo. 


367 


offerings showed their appreciation of the kindness 
Julia had ever manifested towards them. Others 
there were, — costly ones, — bearing no names of 
senders, — but just a line, saying that the life that had 
been as sweet as the flowers had helped to brighten 
their lives, in memory of which the blossoms were 
dedicated. Few indeed had been sent as a mere 
formality. As far as we knew, they were from 
those who had not waited for an opportunity to 
make a public display of their love for Julia, but had 
proved it to her during life. 

The next morning I met Mr. Granby leading Sey- 
mour and Howard through the upper hall. Some 
one had taken charge of the children’s attire and 
dressed them in little mourning suits. Mr. Granby’s 
face wore a distressed look as he said to me: 

“Esther, I have been looking for you everywhere. 
Will you not see that these children are dressed in 
their ordinary clothing? I know Julia’s mind on 
this subject, and it would have grieved her to have 
any of us make such a demonstration as this. 
Besides, I do not want Julia’s boys to have the 
memory of their mother shadowed in this way. 
Hers was a sunshiny life, and I want all recollec- 
tions associated with her to leave a correct impres- 
sion upon their minds.” 

I took the children, dressed them in the blue vel- 
vet suits their mother had ordered only a month 
before, and brought them back to their father. It 
made my heart glad as I saw the relieved look upon 
his face, and he seemed for a moment almost cheer- 
ful as he said : 

“Thank you, that is more suitable.” 


368 


In Primo. 


He kept the children with him most of the day, 
even sitting near them while they slept. I saw that 
already, as far as possible, he had taken the place 
and obligations of both parents. 

The last time I looked upon Julia’s dear face, the 
heavenly light that seemed breaking through the 
loved lineaments was speaking, as no human words 
could speak, of her rest and peace, and of her love 
for us. It almost seemed as if there were a halo 
about her. “Robed in holiness,’’ were the only 
words that suitably expressed the thought then sug- 
gested to my mind. I could but recall her words to 
the minister the last time he visited her, and I think 
it fitting to close this record with them. 

In response to his inquiry whether her hopes of 
the future continued as bright as ever, she replied : 

“Why should they not? I know, — better than any 
one save God, — how imperfect and unsatisfactory 
my life has been. But my hopes are not resting 
upon my past life, — not upon anything I have said 
or done. I rest only in the efficacy of the great 
Atonement. Without Christ I should be undone, 
wretched, miserable, — lost; but God knew I wanted 
to be good, and long ago He took me as I was, and 
since I had no goodness of my own. He robed me in 
Christ’s righteousness.” 

Truly, no other words could describe her appear- 
ance, with the holy light resting upon her face and 
wrapping her about, — only, “Robed in Christ’s 
Righteousness. ’ ’ 


THE END 







